When I decided to take a trip to Portland, I had a certain angle I thought I wanted to write about, well a pretty obvious angle/question, since Portland is 76 percent white (making it the whitest major city in America): Do black people live in Portland?
Not to mention that like many cities across the country, Portland has an ongoing issue with gentrification. With all of that information, I didn't know what to make of the town.
One of my questions got answered early on since I got a chance to connect with young black people as I explored the city. One guy was even named Ermias, which sparked a conversation about Nipsey Hussle's senseless death and how we as young black people can help keep the marathon going.
During all of my rideshare rides, I'd ask, "What should I do while I'm in Portland?" The general answer was, "You should eat..." I guess that makes sense given WalletHub named Portland American's number one foodie city. What I realized after chatting with the locals is that much of what the people of Portland "do" aside from waterfall hikes is try the wealth of restaurants the city has to offer — and there are a lot of them.
I had a Middle Eastern brunch, got my caffeine fix with a dose of sneaker culture at a black-owned coffee shop, and topped it all off with a beautiful meal at an upscale Peruvian restaurant. I'm pretty sure I gained a few pounds while I was here, and thanks to the hospitality at two of the cities newest hotel — I felt like I was in my dream home away from home with fresh, crisp air and a little rain on the side.
Here's what I ate, where I slept, and what I did between meals because those were the main event. (And to be honest, there wasn't much time to see anything in between meals.)
Where I Stayed
The Hi-Lo Hotel
Bianca Lambert / xoNecole
The Hi-Lo Hotel is an upscale boutique hotel from Marriott's Autograph collection. Decked out with high ceiling plush loveseats, tiled floors (which I think were heated), and a bathroom I dream of calling my own. Accented with gold hardware, a Kohler jacuzzi tub, a counter large enough to hold all of my beauty products, and plush robe in the closet — I was in my happy place.
I even had a glass of wine compliments of the Hi-Lo, ran an Epsom salt bath, and relaxed.
As an LAer that is used to a limited amount of space and no bathtub, this was everything to me. Thanks to my bath, I was so relaxed that I tried to watch something on HBO (which was complimentary), but I was out until my alarm went off the next morning.
What made the Hi-Lo even better was their staff attention to detail — using my name to greet me and taking care of my concerns with a sense of urgency. Not to mention the hotel was just a block away from Nordstrom, Zara, and a new favorite, MUJI. Imagine Ikea, but with Japanese skincare, minimalist clothes, and sleek homeware. I almost spent all my coins in there, but I talked myself out of it.
The Hoxton Hotel
Bianca Lambert / xoNecole
The Hoxton Hotel is relatively new to Portland and is a hotel concept out of London, which means they are known for their European style rooms and culture. For instance, their room sizes are smaller, and their linens are a little different too. So don't think the housekeeping staff forgot to put a top sheet on the bed or left the room without placing face towels on the rack. If you're a traveler that wants to spend less time snuggled in their room, and more time exploring the city or even the property itself this is your hotel.
With a full-service restaurant (La Neta), a rooftop bar (Tope), and a speakeasy-style basement bar, you don't even have to leave the hotel. One thing I will note is while the hotel decor was beautiful and the staff was friendly, the service was lacking. I had to ask multiple times to get the thermostat adjusted in the room, and even after requesting that many times, no one came up or followed up until Ellie stepped in by bringing me an extra duvet and a glass of wine along with a sincere apology.
Aside from that small issue, I'd say the location, decor, and even the room sizes make it ideal for a traveler that likes swanky style with the exploration.
One more perk of this Portland newbie is that they offer a complimentary breakfast option (granola, yogurt, and organic OJ) and if you have a late night craving for a late night snack like M&Ms or chips, you can grab them downstairs for just a dollar.
What I Ate
Deadstock Coffee
Bianca Lambert / xoNecole
Deadstock Coffee was at the top of mind because I read that it was black-owned and their inspiration was sparked by their love of coffee, sneakers, and community — and it showed. Walking into Deadstock was a sensory experience. With the smell of coffee, the sounds of beans grinding over the hip-hop tunes, and the sneakers and lockers lining the walls, you knew what they were trying to say. Since they don't have a menu, I wasn't sure what to order until the barista said, "We're known for our mocha." A few moments later, I was snapping a picture of my sneaker-topped mocha and sipping it on my way to my next place.
Bianca Lambert / xoNecole
Fried Egg I'm In Love
I was told to expect a line at Fried Egg I'm In Love, but lucky for me I'd just missed the lunch rush. I walked up and was greeted by Ryan, who I asked to tell me what I should order. I always want to know what the locals think is good because they know better than anyone. "Order the YOLKO ONO," he said.
Stacked with a fried egg, homemade pesto, parmesan, and a hand-pressed house sausage patty, the sandwich already sounded delicious, but he told me to add Havarti and aardvark aioli — which I did, and it was one of the best things I've ever eaten. I usually find over-hyped restaurants to be a disappointment, but this one was worth it.
Tusk
Bianca Lambert / xoNecole
I was going to head over to Voodoo Doughnut for breakfast, but decided on Tusk — a Middle Eastern restaurant that everyone in this town raves about, I mean everyone. Screen Door (another local fave) was just across the street, but the line was out the door, and I was in a time crunch because I had a horseriding lesson at noon. I walked into the airy eatery and was seated at the bar. I took a look at the menu and decided on the Chicken and Apricot Sausage that came with chickpeas, yogurt, fried cauliflower, sunny eggs, and of course the sausage. I almost asked to take the yogurt off, but part of enjoying something new is having it the way the chef envisioned. It was one of my favorite meals I had over the course of my trip, but I have to talk about the rhubarb tart.
Y'all, it was so good—I inhaled the warm, crispy pastry in what felt like seconds.
Tasty and Daughters
Bianca Lambert / xoNecole
Next up was venturing to the Southeast to try another recommendation of my Uber drivers. This was another restaurant that I was told to be prepared for a wait, but I think skipping weekend brunch and opting for their Happy Hour saved me some time. I walked in and was seated at the end of the bar. One thing that stuck out to me about this restaurant was their chef Marcus Sherard, who is a black and classically trained with Southern roots. The happy hour menu had a lot to offer layered with oysters, radicchio salad, frites, and a fried chicken biscuit. I went for the biscuit, and it didn't disappoint — the biscuit was flakey, the chicken tender, and I felt like the bartender saw me when she said, "Would you like hot sauce?"
Santé Bar
Black-owned and operated by Véronique LaFont, the Santé Bar is a part of the community and a favorite local hangout. You can feel it the moment you walk through the door of the LGBTQ craft cocktail bar. If you're a fan of charcuterie and an original cocktail like the Cat's Meow (all designed by the owner), you'll enjoy spending a little time here.
Pok Pok
Bianca Lambert / xoNecole
Another local recommendation was Pok Pok, a street Thai restaurant that comes highly recommended because of their fish-sauce wings, which didn't disappoint. If you're a sour whiskey person, don't forget to order their Tamarind Whiskey Sour.
Andina
I had to make my last night's dinner count by going to a highly recommended upscale Peruvian spot called Andina. From the service to the food, it lived up to its reputation. Everything was wonderful: the Yuca Frita, Acelgas, Conchas A La ParrIila, and the service was top notch, thanks to Kale. Oh, and don't forget to have their Sacsayhuamán cocktail made with habanero pepper vodka shaken with pureed passionfruit and cane sugar. Since I love a spicy cocktail, this one hit the spot — I wish I could have one right now.
What I Did
Vintage Window Shopping on Hawthorne Blvd
One thing I loved about Portland was Hawthorne Blvd. Lined with rows of vintage stores and coffee shops (there is no shortage of coffee in Portland), if you aren't afraid of a little rain, you can walk the street and pop in and out of boutiques like Magpie, House of Vintage, Vintage Pink, and plus-size consignment boutique Savvy Plus with friendly faces and epic finds. If you get hungry on your trek, stop by Matt's BBQ Tacos food truck for a quick bite.
Horseback Riding
Getting out of the city was important to me since Portland is known for its green lush backdrop and hiking trails. You all know how much I love an Airbnb experience, so I took a rideshare to North Plains (17 miles from Portland). As my driver swerved around the windy roads, I got a little nervous about getting back, but that wasn't an issue. Thirty-seven minutes later, we arrived at the ranch where I was going to take my first horseback riding lesson. Lisa and Jon were my guides. I walked the grounds, interacted with the horses, and learned about the remarkable creatures.
Then, it was time to learn to ride. If I'm honest, I was terrified. While horses are gentle giants, I still was fearful, but Jon and Lisa did an excellent job of giving me the knowledge to help alleviate the fear and encouraged me to let them know if I was nervous.
Arnold was my horse. I helped brush his silky coat (they shed as it gets warmer) and then Lisa got him ready to ride! My nerves kicked in, so I could walk him around the bard for a bit first. We walked around the barn, and Arnold let me be his guide, but I still wasn't quite ready to ride. But, I did face part of my fear by climbing on Arnold's back, which felt like a small victory. I hope to keep working with horses to get more comfortable with them, but this first is an experience I will always cherish.
Portland is now one of my new favorite cities. It was more than I expected and I can't wait to get back and see more! Next, the time I'll have to remember to pack my denim with lots of stretch and an umbrella.
Featured image by Getty Images
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Bianca Lambert is a proud Atlanta native soaking up the Los Angeles sun. She is the founder of Mae B: a stationery company for women of color and a digital content creator on a mission to elevate the voices of women of color everywhere.
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
The Essential 3-Step Skincare Routine Every Woman Over 30 Needs
At the tender age of 29, I discovered the world of skincare after complaining to a coworker about excessively oily skin. Her list of suggested products? A cleanser, toner, serum, and moisturizer in that exact order. It was that simple. Easy enough, I began using her recommendations, and my life was completely changed forever.
Now that I'm in my 30s and diving deeper into my love of beauty, I've begun to question the simplicity of my everyday regimen wondering if there's more to maintaining beautiful, healthy, and youthful-looking skin.
We all know Black doesn't crack but when reading up on beauty trends, many online experts suggest that every woman over 30 needs specific products to fight against fine lines and wrinkles. To maintain perfectly smooth glowing skin after a certain age, if it's not eye cream, then it's a specific product or procedure that could cost more than what I'm willing to pay for anti-aging effects. I decided to get the real tea on the skincare needs of Black women over 30.
I spoke with beauty expert Eden Gilliam, an esthetician with 11 years of experience in the beauty industry and founder of EVE MILAN, a Black woman-owned skincare company based in New York City.
Courtesy of Eve Milan
"I like to stay away from adding a bunch of extra products into a person's skincare routine that they're not going to commit to. Too many steps ultimately lead to becoming so frustrated that you're not going to do much of anything." Eden states.
"For example, the area around your eyes is more delicate of course, it's the thinnest skin you have so it may need more attention as you age. However, if you have a nice hydrating serum like hyaluronic acid that's already in your daily routine, then you can definitely get away with using that on your under-eye skin. For people that like to keep it natural, using shea butter also keeps that area hydrated." Her point? "Keep your routine simple."
After working hands-on with clients, Eden identified common skincare struggles which led her to create a line of products designed to restore confidence and a healthy glow no matter one's age. She explains, "There isn't anything that a three-step system can't solve." With age comes responsibility and a quick morning and nighttime routine are extremely effective when balancing healthy skin and busy life. "It should only take 10 minutes of your time, knowing exactly what you're doing and feeling confident in your routine."
The Simplicity Set: 3-Step System
"When it comes to the products we offer, like our best-selling 'Simplicity Set,' it's a hydrating cleanser, gentle exfoliant in the form of pads and a serum."
1. Gentle Cleansing Gel No. 103
Courtesy of Eve Milan
Every routine starts off with a cleanser. Eden suggests tackling your skincare basics with a nourishing cleanser that balances oil production while delivering a deep clean.
2. Superfruit Enzyme Exfoliating Pads
Courtesy of Eve Milan
Recently introduced to the process of exfoliation, when speaking with Eden I learned how instrumental this process is for aging skin. "Exfoliating as you get older is going to be the foundation of any skincare routine. You have to exfoliate. As we age, our skin turnover rate starts to slow down and it's not renewing itself as fast as it used to. That's how you get clogged pores, fine lines, and wrinkles, even dry skin. When exfoliating, that allows the remaining products you apply to be more effective."
When asked what's the difference between an exfoliant and a toner, Eden explains, "A toner completes the cleaning process which is why it's used after a cleanser but exfoliants dissolve the glue that holds your skin cells intact. You want these skin cells to regenerate like they used to."
"A chemical exfoliant, which I believe every Black woman should be using, not a scrub (physical exfoliant), penetrates into the skin and keeps working throughout the day. It also increases your skin turnover and helps with appearing how it was in your teens and 20s."
Another tip when using the enzyme exfoliating pads, you can use [them] on your face, neck, chest, anywhere on your body, even your bikini area when suffering from ingrown hairs. Take care of all areas and achieve a head-to-toe glow by getting the most out of your products. Don't neglect the rest of your body by focusing solely on your face while other areas suffer from dry, cracked skin.
3. Reset Serum No. 422
Courtesy of Eve Milan
To complete the 3-step system, Eve Milan's Reset Serum is the perfect universal hydrating formula created for skin types. Doubling as a moisturizer, this is the final step to securing fresh and rejuvenated skin. Eden shares, "If you are going to invest money in anything skincare-wise, you'll want a serum." For a hydrating, vitamin-rich product, the Reset Serum soaks into the skin with healing ingredients like Gotu kola, niacinamide, and ceramides which provide you with anti-aging benefits. Whether oily or dry skin, this hydrating serum is for everyone.
"Asking whether a hydrating serum is for dry skin only is like asking if a person needs water. Your skin needs water, not oil. One of the main things that African-American women deal with is post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation which is brown spots resulting in the lack of hydration. No matter your skin type, you need products that add water to the skin and keep it in there."
Aside from the 3-step process, Eden also shares the importance of good health and probiotics when it comes to healthy skin. She adds, "One thing I tell my clients, we need to take vitamins. Skincare is what you are eating and the vitamins you are taking. Ask yourself what you are eating and drinking. Like caffeine, is it helping you or causing more problems?"
Without the use of harsh chemicals, Eve Milan's mission is to get customers to feel comfortable in their own skin. All the products are made free of sulfates, parabens, phthalates, artificial color, and fragrance to limit your exposure to toxins.
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Featured image by Getty Images
Originally published on October 30, 2021