

It's been 573 days since my last New York Fashion Week. That's one year, six months, and 24 days. The last time I was in Manhattan, February 2020, was just as Big Rona was placing a chokehold on the world. I would have never guessed that while I was living my best life in the NYC streets, a pandemic would soon change my life completely. Because of the state of the world, there were no shows in September and by February 2021, the fashion houses were trying to figure out how to put on runway shows which led many brands to the digital space.
When the New York Fashion Week calendar was released for September, there was no doubt that I needed to be there. I was a bit anxious thinking about how we normally do fashion week -- packed and chaotic -- given the pandemic. But my nervousness subsided when I learned of the vaccination requirement for all NYFW events.
I knew that this season would look different with smaller events but my soul still beamed at the opportunity to get dressed up again, learn about emerging designers and leave a stamp on fashion's biggest month. I'm sure you're ready to hear all about it so keep reading for an exclusive behind-the-scenes gander of this southern belle taking over New York Fashion Week!
Day 1 of NYFW
The weather gods decided that fashion week needed some rain so I opted for a comfy, chic look. This leather dress and sneakers paired with my Telfar bag was ideal for a day running around the city in the rain.
I kicked off my New York Fashion Week with Essence Magazine's Fashion House, "an elite experience discovering and recognizing cutting-edge Black creatives in fashion and their contributions." From the talk with Sevyn Streeter on her style inspirations to the runway show featuring Eclectist, I couldn't ask for a better start to my favorite week of the year.
Next, I headed to NYFW on Fifth, a new location for the shows this year. Fifth Avenue is known for its plethora of stylish stores so it was only right to showcase the future of fashion in the epicenter. I attended the ROOKIE USA show which gave more than it was supposed to in the best ways. In its 12th year, the collection gathered tiny humans (aka kids) as models which made for the most adorable show ever. The celebrity and professional kid models lit up the runway with the latest dance moves and their bright personalities. Seeing celebs like Yung Miami, Dr. Wendy Osefo, and Victor Cruz cheer on their babies made my heart so full.
The last stop of the day: AVNU Back on the Block. If you don't know about AVNU, let me introduce you. Nareasha Willis created this luxury streetwear brand for everyday people. Her most popular creations are the "Ghetto Until Proven Fashionable" pieces because... well, the statement is all facts. I have been a fan of the brand for years so I was in love when I finally met my long-lost cousin. The event was the ultimate family reunion with jamming music, the Electric Slide and 'ayyyyyeeee's all around.
Day 2 of NYFW
I woke up with such excitement because I knew the lewk I planned would eat up the gworls. My talented friend, Candra, made me a custom top speaking all facts, "Ghetto Girls Did It First," and I wore it with a matching mesh top and pants and the oh-so-fabulous Char workroom shorts. My extra-large bamboo earrings and bamboo Brandon Blackwood bag brought it all together. I love making a statement with my outfits and this lewk definitely did that.
Day two started with Tiffany Brown Designs. In her NYFW debut, she created the "Lavender" collection comprised of 50 shades of purple. The pieces were versatile in style from tailored suits to athleisure getups. When speaking about the collection and why she chose NYFW as her coming out, Tiffany said, "Because it's the fashion capital of our country and this is the time to shine and celebrate the human spirit," said Brown.
Photo Courtesy of The Riviere Agency
"Lavender symbolizes and represents spiritual healing, tranquility, easing of tension, and purification. Today, with this collection, we are celebrating the human spirit."
Then, I headed to Spring Studios for one of the most anticipated events this season: The Black in Fashion Council Showroom. I was beyond thrilled the attend the showroom as BIFC's mission "to represent and secure the advancement of Black individuals in the fashion and beauty industry" fills my heart all the way up. I bumped into Blake Van Putten, creator of the cult-favorite bag, "Protect Black Women." We talked about his new designs and the future of CISE and let's just say that he has some heat in store for the people. I also met other Black designers like Samantha Black of Sammy B Designs and Nalebe Footwear designer, Amina E Means.
Joce Blake
Continuing in Spring Studios, I checked out the Rebecca Minkoff "I Love New York" collection. In celebration of the brand's 20th Anniversary, Rebecca unveiled her first-ever collection of NFTs. This new take on fashion week presentations featured model portraits shot by Cass Bird. The immersive NFT experience by Yahoo was definitely one to remember.
Day two's finale show, The Athletic Side of Us (TASOU), left no crumbs. It was definitely one of my favorites this season. For me, the diversity and inclusion of all sizes and bodies was everything. The pieces were designed for everyday life and meet at the intersection of transitional fashion and ancient civilization from southern Nigeria.
Day 3 of NYFW
I wasn't attending the MET Gala but that doesn't mean I couldn't bring MET Gala energy. Day 3's lewk gave blazer and crystal skirt realness. Memphis wardrobe stylist, Jenil Askew, made me this custom skirt and yeaaaaa... she did that!
By Day Three, I was definitely feeling the exhaustion of NYFW but I knew I had to push through. Our first show was the Global Fashion Collective, a platform specializing in supporting creative designers by establishing their presence around the world. I always enjoy the assortment of world designers because it exposes me to new designers and how they embed their culture into every single thread. This season's lineup included Ay Lelum (Vancouver, women's), C'EST D (NY, women's), CEDIM The School of Design (Mexico, women's), Irene de la Vega (Mexico, women's), [unusual] (UAE, men's), SAINTJESUS (Chile, women's), Carlton Jones (NY, women's/men's), SARAL ZENS (China, women's), and Blue Tamburin (Korea, women's/men's).
When I arrived at the Bomb Fashion Show, our girl Olivia Dope was spinning -- it was a whole vibe. The first of its kind, the goal was to increase diversity during New York Fashion Week. Not only was BFS sponsored by Shea Moisture, it also featured two designer ensemble runway shows with beloved brands like Oyemwen, London Couture, and Mah Jing Wong.
Photo Courtesy of Fashion Bomb Daily
Next on the schedule was Deity New York. While Renee Bishop created her black-owned luxury women's wear brand Deity New York, she was determined to leave her mark on her official entrance to NYFW with her signature utilitarian staples designed to make women feel and show up as their best selves.
We love Renee's vision of normalizing black entrepreneurs running luxury brands, so watching the models strut down the runway in her BOLD collection at THE Spring Studios is nothing short of manifestation at work. When thinking about my wardrobe for Spring '22, I'm going to need every look from this collection.
Photo Courtesy of Dynamically Branded PR
One of the events I look forward to the most each season is The Glow Up Meetup. Being surrounded by some of the best and brightest melanated content creators is a badge of honor I don't take lightly. These women move culture and pour into one another authentically. For Glow Up creators, Shay and Tania, it's always been about bringing black women together in a positive space. Saturday night was just that.
Sitting on the Public Hotels rooftop with the most breathtaking views, I kiki'd with some ladies about moving to NYC, how we all are changing the narrative around Black women in luxury and what it really means to be a content creator all while sipping on Moet and nibbling on tuna tartare. If that ain't art imitating life, I don't know what is.
Day 4 of NYFW
For my final outfit, I wanted to serve up "Trench Coat At Your Front Door." Assignment: overstood.
It's now Sunday and the official last day of NYFW. Kevan Hall did what needed to be done and took us to church with his Parisian inspired collection. The architectural structuring, detailed paneling, hand-painted prints, and textured fabrics made for timeless pieces that looked like they were in slow-motion in real-time.
Look no further than Kevan's "Brushstrokes" palette for your spring color mood board. The final walk took me out as the models walked intently to the sounds of a gospel choir singing an upbeat worship song. Even on the front row, I had no choice but to tap my feet and clap like my granny taught me. What a moment!
Photo Courtesy of Kevan Hall Designs
In between shows, I was able to link up with some blogger friends that I hadn't seen in years. These women really taught me so much about the industry and inspired me to keep going when my dreams felt unattainable.
To Sam and Marsha, thank you for being the light I didn't even know I needed. My NYFW journey is nothing without you two.
Courtesy of Joce Blake
To complete my Spring/Summer '22 NYFW, I attended the NOLCHA Shows, a place for independent designers to shine. "Ones to Watch," was the theme this season as they showcased independent fashion brands that epitomize elegance, freedom, and individuality. Each designer came with heat; this was arguably the best Nolcha showcase in years.
While the vibe of NYFW was different due to COVID, it still owes me nothing. I am forever grateful that I get to make my dreams a reality in the Big Apple.
I prayed for this; I love that for me!
To get your fashion fix and to stay up to date with the latest trends, check out the xoNecole Style section here.
Featured image courtesy of Joce Blake
Joce Blake is a womanist who loves fashion, Beyonce and Hot Cheetos. The sophistiratchet enthusiast is based in Brooklyn, NY but has southern belle roots as she was born and raised in Memphis, TN. Keep up with her on Instagram @joce_blake and on Twitter @SaraJessicaBee.
Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
6 Tabletop Sex Positions That'll Unlock You & Bae's Most Primal Desires
Something I will never tire of is finding new ways to bring new layers to intimacy. A wall you use as momentum, a bathroom sink to help you keep your balance as he worships you on his knees, a shower that is usually for cleansing but evolves into a sacred ritual of shared intimacy.
My favorite kind of sex is the kind of sex that prioritizes pleasure and connection. So, technically and thankfully, I can say most of my sex life has been quite pleasurable throughout the years. But the memorable encounters for sure take the cake. One such encounter actually took place on a kitchen counter, and with it unleashed inhibitions in ways I never anticipated while unlocking levels to top-tier sex. And that, that involved a kitchen counter.
Why Kitchen Counter Sex Just Hits Different
What is it about having your hips pressed into the edge of a kitchen counter that lets out something so primal in you? The cool-to-the-touch feel of the countertop against exposed skin as you rise to meet him again and again. The urgency in every movement. The playfulness of repurposing an everyday space for something far more erotic. If you’re looking to bring that energy into your own sex life, keep reading for positions and tips to explore.
1. The Bounce House
They don’t call it Bounce House for nothing. In this position, the penetrating partner lies flat on their back on a sturdy table or counter while the receiving partner straddles them, knees bent and facing away. With their hands gripping the edge of the surface for support, the receiving partner slides or bounces at their own pace, owning the rhythm, the motion, and the view.
According to sex therapist Michael Aaron, Ph.D., who spoke with Women’s Health, the receiving partner placing their legs between their partner’s creates a tighter sensation, while staying fully astride allows for more bounce and range of motion. Either way, this one puts the receiver in full control, and you know we love a good woman on top position. Pleasure and power? Say less.
2. The Bicycle
Well, you know what they say about riding a bike. In the case of this table top position, it's the receiving partner who is the rider...but not in the way you think. While lying back on a sturdy surface or a table, the receiver will bring their knees toward their chest, bending them as if in a cycling motion. The penetrating partner stands at the edge of the surface, grabbing the receiver's ankles, and guides themselves inside, slowly so as to savor the moment. This angle puts everything on display for the penetrating partner while allowing for deep, connected thrusting for the receiver.
To take things up a notch , the receiving partner can touch themselves or flex their thighs to control the depth or the rhythm. Because, who says only one person gets to have control?
3. Counter Offer
How could we be at the table and not use it to eat? Enter: Counter Offer. In this oral-focused sex position, the receiving partner perches on the edge of a counter or table, lying back or sitting upright with legs parted or bent for comfort. The penetrating partner kneels or stands between their thighs, depending on the setup and the kind of attention they’re ready to give. No doubt, this one’s all about access and intention.
With the vulva front and center, the height makes it easier to maintain eye contact, use hands freely for things like breast play or incorporating toys, and take their time with every moan-inducing taste. And that’s on five, six, seven, ATE.
4. Standing Doggy
Standing Doggy is what happens when a classic like doggy style gets an upgrade. Instead of being on all fours on a bed, the receiving partner bends over a hard surface like a table or counter, keeping their hips aligned at its edge. The penetrating partner stands behind and enters from the back, using the angle to go deeper and create a strong, steady rhythm. This one offers maximum control and visual appeal, especially if the penetrating partner reaches around for a little extra clitoral stimulation throughout thrusting.
This angle can get intense quickly, so bonus points if the receiving partner engages their pelvic floor muscles or shifts their weight to adjust how the pressure hits, especially if your goal is to hit that G-spot sweet spot.
5. Top Shelf
Men's Healthcalls this one "Yourself on the Shelf," but we like to call it "Top Shelf" because it's giving full view, full grip, and climax potential that's hard to top. The receiving partner sits on the edge of a sturdy table or counter while the penetrating partner stands in front of them and slowly slides in, thrusting while keeping them in position. From there, legs can wrap around their waist, arms can encircle their back, and the closeness at peak ecstasy? Chef's kiss.
If you have the core strength, add lifting to the menu for the final strokes leading to orgasm. Otherwise, allow the surface to the heavy lifting and enjoy the pleasure.
6. The Thumper
What better way to remind yourself that you're both the snack and the entrée than with a little tableside service courtesy of The Thumper? This position has the receiving partner kneeling on a sturdy table or counter (keyword: sturdy), hands gripping the edge or braced in front for support. The penetrating partner can then either kneel behind them (if there's room for two), or stay anchored on the ground with both feet planted on the floor (similar to the previously mentioned Standing Doggy). It all depends on the mood.
Kneeling on the table offers just the right amount of leverage for deep, steady strokes. The receiving partner can play with tightness by either keeping their knees closer together for a snug grip, or open their knees wider to invite more access, depth, and stretch. The Thumper is versatile that way, and the most important thing? The receiver gets to be the main course. Yum.
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Featured image by Shutterstock