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Navigating Friendship Breakups: How To Breakup With A Friend

In the breaking up process, there's no one right way to do it, but you've got to do it.

xoNecole Happy Hour

As we grow older, friendships that no longer serve us almost become inevitable. We've all experienced our fair share, we all know a few toxic people. In hindsight, the signs of a toxic friend seems obvious, but sometimes when you're in them, it's not always so clear.

Because I'm a bit older, I always think to Girlfriends and the dynamic of Toni Childs and Joan. Toni was damn near unbearable to anyone without boundaries, primarily Joan. She would sneak diss, take advantage, and in many cases, completely disregard her friends. As a main character of the show, we rooted for her, but honestly, sis was toxic af. Breaking up with bad friends isn't something that used to be discussed often (which is why Toni was revered a show fave, versus the villain that she could be), but Insecure's recent highlight of the subject between Issa and Molly, has brought the subject to the forefront.

On this week's Happy Hour podcast episode, Amer and Sheriden explored this topic:

When it's time to break away from friendships that no longer serve us, how do we do it? How do we even know when it's time? What happens when that growth has you pulled in different directions?

Press play and tune in as our favorite ladies dive into:

  • Toxic friends
  • Friendships we've outgrown
  • And the subsequent friendship breakups that they lead to

Have you ever had to break up with a friend?

Amer and Sheriden are accepting voice notes! Click here to send them a 1-2 minute question for your chance to receive on-air advice directly from them! Also, be sure to subscribe and listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

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Navigating Friendship Breakups Show Notes:

Pre-Game:

Clubhouse App (invite-only exclusive new app in the beta stages that has a bunch of super-influencers and celebrity "think tank")

Michael B. Jordan has a new boo (allegedly)! And she's a certain *cough* hue *cough*

Shonda Rhimes isn't with the shade, ABC. #kanyeshrug

Birkin Bags and Saweetie: why is this an indicator of a good boyfriend?

Quincy Brown had a moment, y'all.

Happy Hour:

We open the show by playing a voice note from xoListener, AJ: Breaking up with friends...how?

Tweet: @shesguru

Thoughts?

Sheriden: It's normal to outgrow people. It can be difficult if you don't have tools to communicate it. We have the conversation around relationships, and not necessarily friendships. Currently dealing with this issue.

Amer: You're friends with people at certain stages. It's up to knowing how to navigate the journey. It's never easy, but each situation is it's own case. Set boundaries, and choose yourself.

What do you do when the friendship breakup is no one's fault?

Do we implement boundaries more in relationships vs. friendships?

You aren't going to allow the same things you did when you were younger.

We all can be the toxic friend at some point, it's your duty to realize you're being a shit friend.

Tips for breaking up with friends:

  • Assess your feelings, validate them
  • Have a conversation with that friend, seeing how they respond
  • Assess that response
  • Make a decision

Types of friends:

  • Jealous
  • The one-uppers
  • Weird "complimenters"
  • Insecure a.k.a those who perceive that you're competing...when you're not.

Sis, stop saying, and being, that girl that says "I don't have many girlfriends." *eye roll*

Is it a necessity for you to call someone a friend?

You have to be a friend to have a friend. *poetry snaps*

Is it easier to break up in a romantic relationship than a friendship?

What lessons have you learned from leaving a friendship that you've outgrown?

Resources Mentioned In This Episode:

Clubhouse App

Twitter

Reddit

Netflix

Birkin

Chanel

Gucci

Girlfriends

Insecure

Bustle's "Issa Rae Has More To Do"

People Mentioned In This Episode:

Meek Mill

Mulatto

Necole

Joe Rogan

Joe Budden

Beyonce Of Marketing

Michael "Bae" Jordan

Jamie Foxx

The Beckhams

Shonda Rhimes

Drake

Saweetie

Quincy Brown

Frida Kahlo

Melinda Gates

Issa Rae

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Feature image by Shutterstock

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