First comes love, then comes marriage, and I'm sure we all know the rest of the story. Disney movies and cheesy rom-coms have successfully convinced us all that this process should be easy and painless as long as we're good people. The problem with this logic is, that's not always how it works in the digital age for all women.
Although we're taught by elders and members of the church that our bodies are sacred and that sex should be saved for marriage, it makes me wonder a little. Is marriage really even worth the wait? According to Lolo Jones, 36-year-old Olympic competitor bobsledder, reality TV star, and virgin, the answer is "yes."
The athlete has always been vocal about her religious background and choice to stay abstinent until marriage, and it's a promise to her future husband that she plans to keep. On the latest season of Celebrity Big Brother, the Olympian opened up to her fellow cast members about her choice.
According to Lolo, although she's shared a mutual attraction with men, none have yet to make it past the dating stages:
"I like a ton of people, it just doesn't work out."
She shared that in the past, even pro-athletes and celebrities have failed to make the cut. It's hard to believe that a woman as beautiful, talented, and successful as Lolo can be just as clueless as we are when it comes to the dating game, but it's hard out here for a Christian. She said:
"Trust me, I've tried every occupation. I don't know why God hasn't blessed me with my husband."
Despite her lack of luck in the dating world, Lolo says that her motivation comes from keeping faith in God. We've all heard of Steve Harvey's infamous "90-day" rule, but the stakes are much higher when it comes to holding out until marriage. The reality star said that the thought of "the wait" is enough to send a number of potential partners packing:
"Another reason why I'm probably single is because I've never had sex and guys do not want to wait for girls. When I tell them that, a lot of them either think I'm lying, so then they hang out and then they're like, 'Oh, she was telling the truth.' Or there's the ones that think it's a challenge. And then they realize, 'Oh, literally I'm gonna have to marry her' – and then they exit."
Celebrities like Lolo and Insecure's Yvonne Orji prove that the wait really can be sexy, but it can also be very difficult.
I think most of us can remember our first time and how awkward, weird, and truly unforgettable it was, and honestly, I wouldn't mind a re-do. My first sexual experience was regrettable, to say the least, but I believe that it was mostly because sex was something I was not quite mature enough to handle at 17 years old, and hell, sometimes I wonder if it's something I can handle at 25. Even though I understand that I'm only made better through my experiences (even the really, really bad ones), I can't be the only one who wonders what life would have been like if my first and only sexual partner was my husband.
On one hand, our sexual incompatibility could have the potential to ruin our marriage before it even starts, but on the other, would I even know it's not good if I hadn't shared the experience with anyone else? Here's what Lolo had to say about it:
"Well for me, it's gonna be good, 'cause I don't have a comparison."
Real sh*t, Lolo.
The athlete says she has no fears about her wedding night, but the groom better damn sure be worth the wait. She told fellow cast members:
"I will not compromise on my morals and this is an amazing gift I'm giving to my husband so he better damn well be worth it."
What do you think about abstinence before marriage? Sound off in the comments!
Featured image by Skip Bolen/CBS.
