Jada Pinkett Smith Says She Understands Why Some Women Are Attracted To Married Men
Secretly, we all have a proclivity to want the things we can't have. The person next to you may have ordered the exact same thing on the menu, but for some reason, their food always looks better because the grass is always greener on the other side. We play this never-ending game of cat and mouse with ourselves, and in most cases the end result is dangerous.
Let's use the relentlessly sexy nature of a happily married man as an example. I personally have never been involved with a married man, but can admit there's something that's downright delicious about a man who can both commit to and hold down his household, and Jada Pinkett Smith says that's part of the reason infidelity rates are so high.
Earlier this week, the Red Table Talk host recently sat down with Extra and broke down what she thinks is the real reason women are attracted to married men. Jada explained:
"I tend to think that women who are attracted to married men — and specifically married men with power — it creates the sense of stability and security. And I'm not saying it's right, but I do get understanding on why women are drawn in that way. It's like, it creates security for my survival."
According to a biological process called mate-choice copying, Jada is right. A number of scientific studies suggest that most women find men more attractive when they are partnered. Research shows that this attraction to married men is less about home-wrecking and more about a sense of stability.
While studies also proved that women preferred these men in theory rather than in practice and preferred to interact with a ringless man, the fact remains that there's something about a married man that feels safe and resembles the sense of security that many single women desire. Jada explained that it's a desire that dates back centuries.
"He can build a house, back in the day he could build a beautiful log cabin, he could go out and kill a lion and bring it to the house so you can eat. Men from the other village would come in and he'd whoop some ass. That's the feeling, it's primal."
While this is not a green light to go out and romance someone's husband, it does also confirm why your old friend from college suddenly seems awfully handsome after he posted his engagement photos on Facebook.
The funniest thing about mate-choice copying is, it has less to do with how fine a man may be and more about his choice in a partner. This biological process looks a lot like copying your notes from the smart kid in class, except in this case, the notes are another woman's husband. The report showed that a woman is more likely to be interested in a married man if his wife is attractive; so in other words, if ladies are looking at your man, it's just because you're poppin', sis.
The more you know! You can get out Jada's full interview below!
Jada Pinkett Smith Weighs In on Women Being Attracted to Married Menyoutu.be
Featured image by Instagram/@JadaPinkettSmith.
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
Feature image courtesy
The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image courtesy
Lauren London Is On A Journey Of Self-Love: 'I Need To Learn Who I Am Outside Of My Trauma'
Lauren London has gone through many transitions in her life, from becoming a mother to experiencing loss when her beau, Nipsey Hussle, passed, and now she is focused on self-love.
During her conversation on A Really Good Crypodcast, the beloved actress revealed her struggles with self-love and why it's important to take this time in her life to learn how to love on herself.
"I've never really functioned in self-love. I've never really functioned in self-acceptance, and this is my time to learn what that is," she shared.
"I need to learn who I am outside of my trauma, from the childhood trauma and then the adult trauma. I need to really know what it feels like to be in sovereignty with me, and that's the space that I'm in.
"I don't really know self-acceptance like that and I would like to know that. I would like to see myself the way God intended me to see myself. Not through the reflection of anyone else right now, really just through the eyes of God."
She continued, "I didn't have that growing up. I had a lot of things I had to overcome. I've been in survivor mode for many years before the tragedy (Nipsey's death), and so I need to love on Lauren. I need to see what that is."
Being an actress, Lauren opened up about some of the things that come with the territory, including going to events and parties to stay relevant.
While she said going out doesn't fill her soul, it is a constant battle with her friends and her team. But according to the mom of two, she no longer wants her identity to be tied to her work.
"I think now I'm just, again, finding home within myself," she said. When it comes to what's next for the You People star, Lauren said she doesn't know and it's okay to just be and sit in what you just accomplished.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image is by Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for Glamour