Meet Bridget Kelly--the gorgeous and feisty New York native known for killing the live performance of “Empire State of Mind” with Jay-Z .
Now six years after being one of the first signees on Roc Nation in 2008, Bridget has left the label, and let's just say that being an independent artist sure looks good on her.
Doing the infamous "big chop” after her label breakup, Kelly went from being a long-haired brunette to a pixie cut blonde, and her music is also reflecting her newly found confidence. She recently released her new EP, Summer of 17--an ode to a simpler, more carefree time in her life.
Kelly tells xoNecole that she’s the happiest and most at peace that she’s ever been. As she approaches 30, she’s still the life of the party and is the voice of reason for women to know it’s okay to still enjoy life without the pressures of marriage or kids.
Whether you’re an aspiring artist or you’re just trying to figure out what comes next, get your tissues ready because Kelly’s story is a real tear jerker! As she prepares to take Summer of 17 on tour in the UK as well as the east coast, learn how leaving Roc Nation was liberating professionally as well as the chance for her to be in control of creating the life she’s always envisioned for herself as an artist.
What do you now know about yourself that you didn’t know when you were seventeen?
The biggest mistake that I’ve consistently made throughout my adolescence and early 20s is I didn’t trust myself. I didn’t trust my intuition, and I let too many people sway me in different directions; I was really malleable. I gave a lot of people the benefit of the doubt of knowing what was best for me. I now trust myself and I know that it’s okay to go through a trial and error process, but at least I have the peace of mind and the confidence to make a choice that I know at some point whether now, or later is going to be beneficial for me.
In an interview with The Breakfast Club, you said, “At 29, I rather be poppin' bottles instead of poppin' out babies.” Most women feel pressured to be married and have kids by age 30. How have you taken that pressure off of yourself?
I would be lying if I said that at some point I don’t want to have a family. The pressure is definitely there, but I’ve found that I’ve always been a late bloomer within my circle of friends. I can take pride in the fact that I’ve made decisions that have worked for me. I recently went on a bachelorette trip and three out of the five girls were engaged or married. I like being the single fun girl. I wouldn’t say I’m the life of the party all the time, but a lot of times I am and I think that’s okay. People can be themselves and have a good time around me and I rather eternalize that than focus on the assumption that I’m “lacking” something.
[Tweet "Not having a man or a husband doesn’t mean you “lack” anything. "]
I think that’s the unfortunate stigma about being in your 30s as well as your 40s. A lot of women seek validation from a relationship. If I’m not validated by any of the amazing things that I’ve accomplished or all of the things that I’m doing for myself, a boyfriend or a husband isn’t going to validate me. So I’m not actively pursuing it.
Your new single “Act Like That” with Mack Wilds will be every woman’s new anthem. How does your thoughts on men and love translate to your music?
I love being in love. However, if something doesn’t work out or happen for me in the timeframe that I want it to, I’ve learned to just let it go. I now take a less intense approach to relationships because I want it to feel natural; I want it to be a normal progression.
I’m a control freak by nature so typically I would drive the relationship, but I’m at a point in my life where it needs to be on cruise control. Summer of Seventeen was really special for me because conceptually I felt like I was back to being a teenager again. I want to be able to flirt and feel the butterflies and the romance of a new relationship. “Act Like That” with Mack Wilds is the battle of the sexes. As a woman, there’s nothing wrong with knowing what you want and being able to navigate your way through it.
You’ve mentioned that you left Roc Nation after six years because you felt your career had reached a plateau. When you’re a new artist how do you find a balance of speaking up for yourself and what you want for your career as opposed to falling back and doing whatever the label and the executives think is best?
New artists should understand and accept that most people aren’t out for your best interest because at the end of the day, this is a business. You can lose sight of that when you get caught up in the industry and in the process of trying to make an album. People still have this delusion that when they get signed they’re about to make a million dollars and life a certain kind of unrealistic lifestyle and it doesn’t work like that.
New artists should know, no one is against you but most people are out for self, they want to make sure they’re going to win. So you have to be very clear and concise with your team and make sure everyone is on the same page with your execution. What’s missing in the process now with labels and artists is development. They want to sign a total package. They don’t want to sign you then have to help you figure it out. Labels expect you to come to the table already prepared and that’s really difficult when you’re young and you may not know who you are as a person.
But if you know yourself, you know what you want to say and you know the power of your voice then any scenario you’re placed in, people will either take what you have or they won’t. The best piece of advice I’ve ever received was from Lady Gaga. She said.
[Tweet "'Stop asking questions and start making statements!'"]
When you make statements, people have no choice but to embrace and absorb what you’re bringing to the table or they can walk away from it but ultimately what you’ve created, people have to respond to and that’s the power of being an artist.
You’ve said you’ve gained more confidence in the past 10 months as an independent artist than you had in six years at Roc Nation. How did you know it was time for you to leave?
I finally began to trust myself. I felt like it was time for me to go maybe a year or two prior to me actually making the move, but I was scared. As an artist, when you’re attached to something for so long, it’s kind of like being in a relationship in the public eye, when you want to part ways and be your own entity, there’s a lot of fear associated with that. I wondered if people were going to accept me, are they going to care? Are they going to judge me and think I’m crazy for walking away from Roc Nation? I was paralyzed by that fear for about a year. With the execution of my last EP, Cut to Bridget Kelly, it wasn’t at all how I wanted things to go and I realized it was no longer my dream or my vision that I was living; I was just going through the motions. I remember Jay-Z saying to me, 'When you stop having fun, it’s time to quit.’ And I definitely wasn’t having fun. I felt like I was begging to release music, begging to get in the studio or get on tour and nothing was going how I wanted it to go.
Granted, initially I wasn’t being as proactive because I was expecting other people to do it for me, which led to me being unhappy. So when the time came for me to leave and have that conversation, everyone was on the same page. It took a lot of pressure off me because everyone was really supportive of me. It was probably the most amicable breakup I’ve ever had!
But don’t get it twisted after I left, I absolutely hit rock bottom. I went through months where I didn’t know what I wanted to do next.
I didn’t know how I wanted to sound or who was going to want to work with me. I really went into a slump and the relationship that I was in for four years came to an end, which was partially my fault because when I was really unhappy, I pushed him away. I also parted ways with the management team I started with nine years ago. So at that point, I had no label, I had no man and no management. I remember thinking if one room is on fire, I’m just going to burn the whole house down! That was the moment when most people would have been like, ‘Enough. I’m going to quit. It didn’t work out for me. I can walk away from everything and start my life over.’ Within that time I got called to headline a show in London and it sold out, the line was around the corner.
Removing myself from my environment here and being able to go to a different country where no one knew what I was going through personally--I was falling apart--but to have people connect to me and my performance reaffirmed where I was supposed to be. I hired a new team, started working my album and I starting writing again, which I hadn’t done in a year. I started working out again and eating better. I began seeking things that made me feel good as opposed to trying to fill voids.
The filing of voids is what got me in trouble in the first place, I was just doing everything that came across my path but nothing felt like me anymore so I got back to doing things that were really fulfilling.
While you were going through your transition, how did you maintain your mental health and positive self-image?
Working out and being fit is more for my mental health than anything else. I have stretch marks and cellulite, but I don't care!
Going to the gym, sweating and being able to push myself to be better than I was the day before is powerful. I’m continually recognizing my power day by day, because it’s still a struggle. I'm an independent artist.
[Tweet "I know a lot of people have counted me out but I wake up everyday and I fight."]
Things aren’t perfect, but I think I’m the happiest and the most at peace that I’ve ever been.
I’m more confident than ever because I know that everything that’s happening around me is what I’m building. I’m not reactionary anymore, I’m proactive. Everything that’s going on in my life, either I made a decision to put myself here or I’m reacting differently. I now know who I am. If someone had asked me five years ago where I thought I would be today, I would have never guess here but there’s a lot of beauty in every aspect of the journey.
Photo Credit: Bridget Kelly (@iambridgetkelly)
You recently switched up your style from being a long haired brunette to being a blonde with a pixie cut! For your new fans, who is Bridget Kelly and what’s the message behind your music?
Be free and happy!
The stigma that gets attached to you when you do soulful R&B music, is that you’re this love scorned, bitter, broken hearted woman all the time and you’re just struggling to be loved and I’m not that girl.
I’ve had those moments but that’s not what I embody. That’s not the essence of who I am. Sonically, my music is soulful; it’s coming from a place of pain and it’s also coming from a place of victory and I’m proud of that.
When you were seventeen, how did you go about getting your record deal? With such an influx of social media, it can be overwhelming for an aspiring artist to figure out what platform they want to use to get notice, what would you advise them to do?
At 17, I was performing at any open mic that would have me. I brought a speaker and a microphone and I went down to the L train station in NYC where I would sing, pass out CDs and ‘I heart B.K.’ t-shirts. Ultimately, because I went to a performing arts high school, those connections helped me get my foot in the door. One of my classmates was interning at Def Jam, she met someone who was looking for an artist. I recorded a demo and within two years, we had a direct contact to someone at Roc Nation. The label had just started and it was me, J.Cole and Rita Ora.
For new artists, you can post your music on every social media outlet but most importantly, you still have to be able to perform live. If you can put on a good show, people will gravitate towards that. There’s a saying that people will never forget how you made them feel. Good performances are influential; once you can capture someone’s attention in that way, you’re on the right track.
Want more Bridget Kelly? You can support her new EP 'Summer of 17,' which is available now on iTunes.
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
___
Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
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