What exactly are essential oils? Probably the best way to explain them is, they are compounds that are extracted from various types of plants. Essential oils are processed in such a way that they are able to maintain the plant's scent, taste and health benefits. Personally, I am a huge fan of them. I like how potent they are. I like how helpful they are. And, I like how long the scent of them linger. Yeah, essential oils are dope.
When I first started using them, it was strictly as a perfume/cologne alternative. These days, I use them for homeopathic reasons too. Lavender is great for sleep. Rosemary is great for hair growth. You can check out my article, "8 Natural Aphrodisiac Scents, Where They Go & How To Make Them Last" to see how they can help you out, in a major way, in the bedroom department (wink). But if you'd like to learn about how to apply essential oils in a therapeutic health-related kind of way, not only do I have six different oils that I think you should get into, but six places on your body where you should put them. Are you ready to start feeling much better? Let's do this.
(Special note: Make sure to always mix essential oils with some type of carrier oil. Most of them are quite potent and can irritate your skin if you don't.)
1. Hairline
Aside from the fact that applying a little lavender oil (along with a carrier oil like jojoba or coconut) can help to stop a receding hairline, because lavender is the kind of oil that contains properties that help to treat anxiety, insomnia and even depression-related symptoms, it would make sense why massaging a little of it along your hairline or temples would be a great way to reduce stress. In fact, if you have a headache or even a migraine, applying the oil to this area of your head can help to relieve some of the pain and tension that you feel.
Application Tip: While it's super effective to massage lavender oil directly along your hairline or onto your temples, an alternative approach is to put a few drops on a piece of tissue and inhale the oil directly. While this method won't do anything to get your hair to grow back, it can help to knock your headache discomfort within a matter of moments.
2. Rim of Ears
Just like a lot of research points to the fact that a lot of health issues can be diagnosed (and relieved) through reflexology, there are also studies that reveal providing special attention to our ears can help to heal our systems too; it's called auriculotherapy. When people participate in auricular acupuncture, it can do everything from lower blood pressure and relieve stress to suppress appetites and improve their quality of sleep.
If you'd prefer to "ease into" auriculotherapy, something that you might want to try is rubbing some rose oil on the rim of your ears. The properties in rose oil are perfect for increasing feelings of calm, fighting migraines and even creating a mental atmosphere in order to make sounder decisions.
Application Tip: Add 2-3 drops of rose oil to a half teaspoon of sweet almond oil. Apply some of the oil to your fingertips and then rub the oil blend along the rim of both ears. Rub it in as much as possible and allow the oil to penetrate for the rest of the day.
3. Wrists
A lot of times, when we think of applying something to our wrists, it's strictly for scent purposes. However, this is a great place to put essential oils for health reasons too. Because your radial artery runs along the inside of your wrists, applying oils there is one of the fastest ways for the oils to hit your bloodstream. A good oil to try is oregano oil. It's a potent oil that fights bacteria, reduces free radicals and reduces bodily inflammation. So, if you're feeling under the weather, some oregano oil on your wrists might be all that you need to get to feeling like your old self again.
Application Tip: Again, since your wrist is a pulse point, it's a good idea to check out this essential oil dilution chart, just so you can determine how much carrier oil to mix in with the kind of oregano oil that you plan to use.
4. Stomach
If you've got digestive issues of any kind, you might want to rub some peppermint oil onto your tummy. Aside from it being the kind of oil that can clear up congestion, relieve PMS-related symptoms and help to speed up the healing process of the common cold, peppermint oil is also able to reduce nausea, treat irritable bowel syndrome and make menstrual cramps more bearable too.
Application Tip: Peppermint oil is pretty potent, so you'll probably only need 3-5 drops per one-third cup of your favorite carrier oil (due to olive oil's antioxidants, it's a good pick for this). Warm up the oil in your microwave for 15 seconds and then massage the oil directly into your abdomen. The menthol will provide a cooling sensation as the warm oil soothes you at the same time. Also, if you'd prefer to drink the oil, you can put a couple of drops into your water or smoothie, so long as the peppermint oil is 100 percent pure.
5. Legs
Whether you've got restless leg syndrome, varicose veins or muscle soreness, chamomile oil is a wonderful natural remedy. It's an oil that reduces inflammation and muscle spasms. Chamomile oil also heals wounds and skin conditions like eczema and rashes, plus it can promote a good night's sleep.
Application Tip: Either add 10-15 drops of chamomile oil into your bathwater or massage your legs with 3-5 drops per a cup of your favorite carrier oil. Massage your legs right after showering or bathing for instant relief from any discomfort that your legs may be feeling.
6. Bottom of Feet
One of the reasons why you should be extra cautious about where you choose to walk around barefoot is because some of the largest pores on your body are located at the bottom of your feet. This means that, similar to your wrists, this is another way for essential oils to hit your bloodstream quicker.
For this reason, bergamot is a wonderful oil to apply to this part of your body. Its antibacterial and antibiotic properties fight infection, alleviate pain, lower blood pressure, relieve stress and, if you rub the oil on your entire foot, bergamot will keep it extra smooth too.
Application Tip: A cool way to massage the bottom of your feet while applying bergamot oil to it is to use a roll-on. You can purchase empty bottles for essential oil via sites like Etsy and Got Oil Supplies. Now what are you waiting on? Get some essential oil and get to feeling better!
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
7 Essential Oils All Naturalistas Need For Their Hair
The DIY Way To Prep Your Feet For Spring
Featured image by Shutterstock
- A Guide to Essential Oils: How to Use Them Safely for Beauty | Allure ›
- How Do I Choose and Use Essential Oils? | Taking Charge of Your ... ›
- How to Apply Essential Oils For Beginners - YouTube ›
- How to Use Essential Oils with a Diffuser, on the Skin, in Bath, More ›
- Where to Apply Essential Oils On the Body - Naturally Blended ›
- Where Should I Apply My Essential Oils | Essential oils, My essential ... ›
- How To Use Essential Oils: 16 Tips for Essential Oil Safety ›
- Your Head-to-Toe Guide: Where to Use Essential Oils Topically ... ›
- How to Use Essential Oils | dōTERRA Essential Oils ›
- How to Use Essential Oils Guide | Benefits, Uses, and Safety ›
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That’s why, when one couple came to me and asked what was something that they could do to light the fire (pun intended) in their own bedroom, the first thing that I asked was if they had ever tried wax play before. You should’ve seen the expression on their faces. LOL.
When it comes to things like that, I think that it’s still taboo for some, simply because they’ve only seen it on a movie screen or heard about it in true extreme sexual contexts — and so, they don’t think that it’s something that is “for them” when, the reality is, with the right tips in tow, wax play can be for pretty much anyone…and everyone.
So today, let’s add something new to some of y’all’s boudoir list of activities. Here are 10 things that will, hopefully, help you to see the flames of wax play (I’ve got puns all over the place today) in a whole new light.
1. Anticipation Does Wonders for Sexual Arousal
GiphyI once read an article by a mental health expert who said that anticipation is probably the greatest aphrodisiac of all. It builds excitement. It fuels curiosity. At the end of the day, it’s like a mental form of edging because you’re getting close to something that you look forward to — although you’re not quite there yet. Listen, he’s not off base because even science says that anticipation can give you a dopamine hit that can ultimately improve your sexual experiences.
Keeping this point in mind, how can watching hot wax drip from a candle and head toward your body not fuel some level of anticipation? Especially if it’s your first few times trying it? A woman by the name of Ana Monnar once said, “Anticipation is sometimes more exciting than actual events.” Just something to consider, when it comes to entertaining bringing wax play into your world, my dear.
2. Wax Play Is Peak-Level Foreplay
GiphyWe all know what foreplay is, right? Just to be sure that we’re all on the same page, a very basic definition is it’s something that typically happens right before sex in order to arouse the people who are about to have it. And since foreplay is pretty much the prelude to copulation, it’s important that “the appetizer” is damn near as good as the “main course.” Wax play can help to ensure that because, aside from what I just said about anticipation, it can also help you and your partner tap into your more sensual and seductive sides. It’s hot. It requires being mindful. And since so much give and take is involved, it requires both people to be very into the moment. Lawd. Wax play is sexy to even just think about!
3. Temperature Pleasure Is Lots of Fun
GiphyOkay, say that you’ve never played with wax (in this way) before. Have you ever incorporated ice cubes? I ain’t gonna let y’all get ALL up in my business, so…let me just say (for now) that some ice during oral sex ain’t neva hurt nobody…quite the contrary! There’s something about the unexpected cool that mixes around with the warmth of a mouth that is truly unmatched. Along these same lines, wax play brings in the heat and, what makes temperature pleasure/play so awesome is, that it uses the sensations of different temperatures to bring out different forms of stimulation.
Another thing that’s worth noting about temperature pleasure is if you’re someone who considers yourself to be on the sexually conservative side yet you do like this type of activity, whether you realize it or not, you’re low-key participating in a form of kink (yep!). This brings me to my next point.
4. Wax Play Is an Introduction to Kink
GiphyIt’s kind of interesting how some people clam up at the thought of a (sexual) kink when the reality is, at the end of the day, it’s about having a certain type of sexual experience (as opposed to a fetish that focuses on objects or body parts; like a foot fetish, for example). So, if it’s that simple, why does it intimidate a lot of folks? Well, kinks tend to delve into people’s fantasies or unconventional ways of thinking (like BDSM or voyeurism).
At the same time, the cool thing about kinks is you control how deep you want to go. Just know that if you do participate in wax play, there’s no point in turning up your nose to the whole kink thing; wax play technically qualifies.
5. Soy Does One Thing. Paraffin Does Another.
GiphyOkay, so let’s spend a couple of moments talking about the things that you need to get the most out of your wax play experience. First, please don’t be out here imitating movies. While they will have you believing that you should pull a taper candle from your dining room table and go ham with it, it’s best to go with massage candles; they are specifically designed for wax play and body massages (The Knot has a recommendation list here and Women’s Health has a list of their own here).
When it comes to candles, in general, I’m always a fan of soy because they burn cleaner and last longer. However, when it comes to wax play, two other reasons why soy is best is it’s natural and “burns lower;” this simply means that once the wax hits your body, it won’t be as hot as, say, paraffin wax will (because it has a higher burning point).
What all of this means is if you want a more comfortable experience, go with a soy (or even a shea butter or beeswax) candle. If you want to play with the big (wax play) kids, try paraffin.
Oh, and if you’re wondering if you can never use “regular” candles — I mean, it’s your body. All I’m saying is some candles are designed for wax play; birthday candles? They are not. Feel me?
6. Massage Candles Feel Incredible on Your Muscles and Joints
GiphySo, here’s the thing about massage candles: If you’ve ever had a professional massage before, your massage therapist may have used them. And if you’ve gotten a high-end mani/pedi, some paraffin wax may have come into play (no pun intended). That’s because the wax from both types of candles has health benefits that include relaxing muscles, improving joint mobility, and increasing blood flow throughout the body. And when you factor in the fact that the better you physically feel before sex, the better sex will be during it — isn’t that just one more plus for and perk of wax play? I definitely think so.
7. The Aromatherapy Is Incomparable
GiphySomething else that’s awesome about most massage candles is they have a wonderfully alluring scent to them, by design. Yes, that matters too because there is plenty of data out here to support the fact that aromatherapy does everything from reduce stress and relieve bodily discomfort to treat headaches and fight off infections (word on the street is that it may even help with menstrual cramps and menopause).
As far as your sex life goes, aromatherapy is supreme because certain essential oils double up as aphrodisiacs. Lavender, neroli, and rose are proven to improve your sexual function. Geranium reduces anxiety. And listen, if climaxing is your ultimate goal, check out “Ultimate Climax Hack? 10 Scents That Make It So Much Easier To Orgasm” and then look for massage oils that smell like, say, vanilla, saffron or jasmine. Bottom line, a good massage candle that smells amazing is going to be worth every cent that you spent to purchase it.
8. You Will Learn Communication (and Dirty Talk) on a Whole ‘Nother Level
GiphyOne of the reasons why I once penned, “Are You Ready To Apply Your Love Language To Your Sex Life?” for the platform is because, if there’s one thing that I think is so awesome about sex, is it finds a way to incorporate all five of your senses (sight, touch, taste, sound and hearing) as well as your top love languages (words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch and gifts — if you’re open to it).
And when it comes to hearing (and words of affirmation), this is another area where wax play can be a winner because, as you’re learning what works for your partner and they learn what works for you, words have to be exchanged… perhaps even dirty ones.
And why is dirty talk so damn effective? According to scientific research, it has the ability to activate your entire brain (the biggest sex organ that you have) and when this is going on while you’re being physically stimulated — chile, the sky truly is the limit!
9. Wax Play Is Completely Customizable
GiphyYou know back when I was talking about soy candles vs. paraffin ones? Something that I didn’t mention, by design at the time, is that, although I will forever be Team Massage Candles when it comes to this particular topic, there are some known as wax play candles too. What’s the difference? Wax play candles tend to remain pretty hard (after being lit up) while massage candles are designed to melt into a liquid that you can massage on your partner’s body.
Why am I bringing this all up now? Well, it’s to serve as a reminder that wax play can be “dialed up” or “turned down” based on what you want to do. If you just want to put a twist on a massage, you can do that. If you’d like to test your partner’s tolerance level by applying more heat for longer, do that.
Just make sure that you use the kind of wax that doesn’t fully melt on shaved areas of the body (pretty sure why is self-explanatory), that you moisturize your skin beforehand (it’s easier to remove the wax…or whatever is leftover) that way and that you pour around 15-20 inches away from your partner’s body; that gives it time to cool somewhat on the way down. Oh, and if you don’t want to jack up your sheets, you might want to lay down a protective drop cloth (like this one here).
10. It Sure As Hell Ain’t Boring
Season 1 Friends GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphyLast point — and it brings all of this full circle. Now that you’ve read all of the ways that wax play can benefit your sex life, how in the world could you associate it with “boring” on any level? Anything that can get you hype, cultivate eagerness, and enhance what you’ve already got going on…that is worth putting on your sex bucket list and trying at least one time, wouldn’t you say? And why can’t that time be…TONIGHT? Shoot your man a pick of a massage candle with a heart and watch him beat you home.
Then report back (with edits…LOL).
Something tells me that you’ll become a wax play fan — SOON.
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