Cue "Good As Hell" by Lizzo. "I do my hair toss, / Check my nails, / Baby, how you feeling?"
Me: A little discouraged.
I know, as the first month of the year comes to an end, you — and most people have given up on annual commitments to yourselves. This would be a surprise if Strava, a social network for athletes, hadn't released research that showed many give up on their New Year's resolutions before the third week of the month has even kicked in.
Meaning, before February has even begun, you and others alike have given up on the "new year, new me" tradition and have settled with remaining who you were last year.
Which is fine.
But only if you're where you want to be.
Otherwise, I'm sure you feel like you have let yourself down before the year has even truly begun.
With heads filled with so much noise, so many tasks, errands, deadlines, emails, and appointments that are made and forgotten, life this 2019 can feel a little hectic; and adding resolutions onto it can feel downright overwhelming. Nevertheless, it is when the going gets tough, the tough finally gets going.
And you, my friend, are tough. You just need a little push is all. Some words of encouragement, if you will.
And that's where I come in.
Here are 15 positive affirmations to ensure that you are keeping your new year commitment to be a brighter, happier, more fulfilled version of yourself. With these affirmations, you can start to reclaim the time taken and start putting it towards becoming the "new you" you've always dreamed of.
1.I Am Enough.
Say it with me: I am enough. I am enough. I am enough.
Say it ten times. Say it a million.
Say it until the words wash away the doubt that taints your tongue. Because the truth is, out of the seven billion people of this world, nobody is better or more gifted than you.
You are capable of remarkable things and you are enough to brighten anyone's day. You are destined to leave a mark on this world.
So, let it be the biggest mark you can possibly create. Go ahead, look in that mirror and say "I am enough." Shout it to the high heavens if you must, because you, darling, are just that: you are enough.
2.I Am Worthy of Love, Happiness, and Fulfillment
Like I said before, shout it to the high heavens, if you must. You were born worthy of love, happiness, and fulfillment, sadly, somewhere along the way, life made you think you weren't. But I'm here to let you know that you are. How do I know? Well, because you're you.
3.I Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
Some people take life's small slights and setbacks with a shrug, while others freak out, blow up, or fly off the proverbial handle in a loud huff or with silent seething. If you're the latter, it's time to stop sweating the small stuff and let it roll off your back. You already have enough to carry. Instead of growing upset when there is a setback, consider every irritating incident as a chance to work out the reasoning area of your brain. Soon, you'll realize that what constitutes a stressor is subjective and that little setbacks will ruin your day if you let them.
Remember, you've only had a bad moment. Not a bad day. And if you've had a bad day, that doesn't mean you've had a bad life. Go ahead, sweat, it's only natural. But let the small stuff worry about itself. You have better things to do.
4.The Tools I Need to Succeed Are in My Possession
No one is going to appear with the tools you need to succeed in the life that you want. That is up to you. Whether you have to find the tools, buy the tools, or make them yourself, they are accessible, they are limitless, and they are there for the taking. If you want them in your possession, all you have to do is reach out.
5.My Strength Is Greater Than Any Struggle
Say it with me: "My strength is greater than my struggle. I'm fearless. I'm getting stronger every day. I can do this. I'm deserving of my dream. I was not made to give up. Broken bridges cannot stop me."
So, it said, and so it shall be.
6.Happiness is my Birthright. I Embrace Happiness as My Setpoint State of Being
You were born with a natural tendency to bounce back to a happy and joyous state in no time at all. However, as you started 'growing up', perhaps you began losing touch with your natural state of happiness; instead you faked a hybrid portrayal of happiness with the hope of rediscovering that natural happiness eventually.
It's possible that you kept finding ways and means to be happy through material gain, pleasurable stimuli, through social means and relationships. However, not always do external inputs created a lasting state of joy and happiness. When you searched for happiness in the world outside, you forgot that the world that you saw outside of you, was actually mirroring you. When you were in a happier state, you could manifest a happier world around you.
Embrace happiness as your setpoint state of being and accept nothing else, you'll see how quickly your world will shift.
7.I Complete Me. I Am Whole.
Don't worry. You'll find the person that completes you someday.
We hear it so often lately that it's ridiculous.
Which implies that I'm not already whole and need someone else to complete me. That's an issue because it creates the idea that people aren't whole on their own, and it makes people feel broken when they can't find someone they want to be with. There's no problem with people wanting to find the person they want to be with, but when it becomes a quest to be "complete," it's an issue. No one deserves to think they aren't complete on their own. You are. You don't need to search for the piece you think you're missing in the world. You already have it within yourself.
8.I Embrace Change and Acknowledge It as A Gift
Because change is inevitable, it's about time we stop fighting against it. "The only thing constant is change." We know this and we understand that our environment can't stay the same forever. All around us, there is change happening on a daily basis. We are forever growing, expanding, aging, and changing. So, what is it about the world that can seem so overbearing and scary when change happens? Why is it that many of us are instantly repelled by the thought of change?
If we could only learn to let change work for us and benefit us, we could be happier with our lives and the process of growth. Embracing change is key to your success and happiness. So instead of fighting change, acknowledge it as a gift.
9.I Am the Author of My Story. How It Ends Is Up to Me.
Take more agency over your life. Stop letting things happen to you and start taking control of the things that do. How your live ends is up to you. So, decide to make it everything you've want it to be. You're the author of your own story, it is never too late to change the ending.
10. I Release My Attachment to Everything that No Longer Serves Me. I Refuse to Let Anything or Anyone Hold Me Back.
Imagine life without holding onto negative attachments. Imagine a state of peaceful thoughts, which come and go like the ocean tides — without struggle, pain, or resistance. Letting go of attachments can be a difficult thing. You are so used to carrying them around that you're worried what you might feel like once you've let everything go.
Regardless, the truth is: these negative attachments that you're holding onto no longer serve you. And you holding onto them is like trying to swim with an anchor attached to your wrist. Let it go. It might be hard to, but still, let it go. You'll be surprised at what you can find on the surface when you do.
11. I Am Not the Mistakes I’ve Made, and the Mistakes I’ve Made Will Not Be the End of Me
Mistakes are inevitable; and despite knowing this, many spend their time dwelling on them.
Nevertheless, I am going to let you in on a secret, one that many fail to notice: mistakes are proof that you tried. They are lessons that you can learn from. They are important for success. They are in the past and immutable. Holding onto past mistakes can hold you back in life, hurt your present, and ruin your future. Let go of the mistakes you've made so that you can be free. No matter how hard you try, you don't have the power to change it.
No one can change the past, the only thing you can do is accept it, learn from it, and move on.
12. My Future Is My Own
Your future is simply that, your own. So, make it a damn good one filled with everything you want, need, and dream of.
13. I Am Evolving
And no, you cannot switch the word "evolving" to say I am changing. The word "change" implies that there is something wrong with the person you are right now, which simply is not true. In addition, using the word "change" makes you become passive in your active mission of bettering your life and shifting negative thoughts. Change is inevitable. It will always happen to the best—and worst of us, regardless if we are actively participating in our lives.
But, evolving only happens to those who work for it. Evolving only happens to those who choose to develop gradually, evolving only happens to those who choose to make progress, move forward, and make waves. You are evolving, because simply changing is out of the question.
14. I Love Myself Unconditionally
Even in your best forms and even on your worst days: love yourself. Unconditionally. Without limitations, without restrictions. Be kind to yourself. Accept yourself. Love yourself, with everything you've got.
15. I Have Positive, Healthy, and Support Relationships with My Loved Ones
Reminding ourselves that we wish to have healthy and supportive relationships in our lives can remind us to treat others with kindness, compassion, and respect. It can also empower us to stand up for ourselves by creating healthy boundaries in our relationships.
Now that you have these positive affirmations, power to transform your life rests in your hands. I know you'll use it well.
Alexa, play Lizzo.I do my hair toss,
Check my nails,
Baby, how you feelin'?
Feeling good as hell.
Featured image by Getty Images.
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Taysha Robinson is a writer and high school English teacher, based in metro-Atlanta. A self described philomath, you can find her reading books and articles of every genre, attending educational conferences, and hiking wherever the terrain will allow.
When Megan Thee Stallion dropped “Hiss,” a shift happened. From the audacious lyrics to the striking visuals, there was no doubt that the song and video would go viral. The opening of the video shows the H-town hottie rocking a barely there Shibari red dress, showing off her voluptuous frame. It was a sexy moment created by Timeekah Murphy of Alani Taylor. The designer exclusively tells us how the opportunity came about and what it was like seeing her design on Megan for the first time.
xoNecole: How did the opportunity to create such an iconic look for Megan Thee Stallion's "Hiss" video come about?
Timeekah Murphy: The opportunity came from a DM from celebrity stylist Zerina Akers. She asked for a unique Shibari piece for Megan, and I needed to get it done in two days. So, of course, I did everything in my power to make it happen. I've always wanted to design for Megan, so this was an awesome opportunity for me.
xoN: What was that initial feeling of seeing the dress on her for the first time?
TM: I was shocked because, at first, I thought it hadn't been used. I saw Megan's last video and thought, damn, maybe it didn't fit. So, to see it on such an amazing video was breathtaking. I was beyond excited to finally say I designed for her.
xoN: Did you meet her? If so, how was that moment?
TM: I didn't meet Megan during the shoot, but during my time in LA, I got the opportunity to meet her at LA Pride with Tiffany Haddish, Common, and EJ King (stylist). Megan is such an amazing person, so it made it even better to know that my designs were going to be worn by her. I was shocked because, at first, I thought it hadn't been used. I saw Megan's last video and thought, damn, maybe it didn't fit. So, to see it on such an amazing video was breathtaking. I was beyond excited to finally say I designed for her.
"I was shocked because, at first, I thought it hadn't been used. I saw Megan's last video and thought, damn, maybe it didn't fit. So, to see it on such an amazing video was breathtaking. I was beyond excited to finally say I designed for her."
xoN: Walk us through the creation of the dress. How did you come up with the look, and how long did it take to make it?
TM: I was the co-designer for a brand called Deviant in 2018-2020, and we used to make custom Shibari pieces. That's how Zerina knew me. So I'm very familiar with making these types of pieces. We made plenty for Beyoncé, Cardi B, Tiffany Haddish, Tyra Banks, and so many others. So Zerina knew exactly what she wanted.
To get it done, it took me a day and a half. It's very intricate and time-consuming, so I spent about six hours making it then I sent an image of it to Zerina, and she didn't approve the first one, so I had to start from scratch again after getting my guidance and understanding of what was needed. The next day, I went to The Lab and created another version, and she approved it. I had to get it shipped overnight so that she would get it in time and fast forward to seeing it on the big screen.
xoN: What's next for you?
TM: Everything. The sky is not my limit, so the Alani Taylor brand is expanding into so many different avenues. We are getting involved in the community more, offering sewing classes to the youth. I've opened up a store for my brand in Atlanta and now preparing for fall/winter Fashion Week.
Megan Thee Stallion "Hiss" video/ YouTube
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In the dynamic world of food and culture, Pinky Cole shines as a beacon of innovation and passion. As a fellow alumna of Clark Atlanta University, she embodies the spirit of our motto, "I'll find a way or make one," with a twist of her own flavorful magic. From her roots at CAU to the bustling streets of Atlanta and beyond, Pinky's journey with Slutty Vegan has been nothing short of electrifying.
Picture this: Homecoming 2018, where the scent of sizzling burgers mingled with the air of celebration. It was here that many of us first encountered Slutty Vegan, then just a humble food truck dishing out plant-based delights. Fast forward to today, and Pinky's brainchild has blossomed into a national sensation, with over 10 brick-and-mortar spots tempting taste buds coast to coast. Her brand isn't just about burgers; it's a movement, a statement that says veganism can be bold, unapologetic, and downright delicious.
Recently, I had the pleasure of catching up with Pinky at the TV One Urban One Honors, where her presence was as magnetic as ever. Among the glitz and glamor of the event, she remained grounded, a testament to her authenticity and humility. As she continues to trailblaze in the culinary world and beyond, Pinky Cole reminds us that with passion and perseverance, anything is possible.
As a proud alumna myself, I understand firsthand the transformative power of the CAU experience—a whirlwind of growth, discovery, and unforgettable moments that shape us for a lifetime. Pinky, too, knows this journey intimately. With a knowing smile, she delved into her own CAU chronicles, revealing the pearls of wisdom she gathered during those illustrious years.
“I learned to find a way or make one.” She continued, “That means in the face of adversity, that means when your back is against the wall, you're going to pick up and find the resources to be able to do what it is that you need to do to get to the next step. So when they teach you that at CAU, it's more than that. You gotta walk it, live it, breathe it. I’ve had so many situations, and I’m like, listen, if I can make it through my college experience, if I can make it through Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, I can make it through life because I've been able to always find a way or make one.”
But Pinky's story isn't just about business; it's about love, family, and the joy of shared dreams. At Essence Fest 2022, amidst the excitement of wrapping up a panel on stage, Pinky's heart swelled as she said "yes" to Derrick Hayes, her partner in life and in business. Together, they've welcomed three beautiful children into their world, with the youngest one joining the family just a few months ago. These little blessings add layers of joy and meaning to their already vibrant lives, creating a tapestry of love and laughter that defines the Cole-Hayes household.
When the spotlight shifted to the topic of self-care, Pinky offered a glimpse into her world, where nurturing her own well-being takes center stage amidst the whirlwind of entrepreneurial pursuits and personal triumphs. “I've been raw vegan since the day that I gave birth. I've been eating all raw fruits and vegetables and I lost 39 pounds. I'm getting fine again. Getting my lashes done, okay, getting my little microblading, okay, cut my hair," she revealed.
"There’s a rejuvenated spirit in me for 2024, and I believe that every woman who goes through the transition of giving birth and going through postpartum should just really find a shift in energy so that they can find themselves again. So, I'm finding me again. I know that I'm a mother, I’m a wife, I’m a girlfriend. I’m dating, okay, I’m a sister also, I gotta come first because if I don't, how can I possibly pour in anybody else's cup.”
There’s a rejuvenated spirit in me for 2024, and I believe that every woman who goes through the transition of giving birth and going through postpartum should just really find a shift in energy so that they can find themselves again. So, I'm finding me again.
We caught up with #PinkyCole as she stunned on the red carpet of #UberOneMusicHonors and she dropped a whole word! Whew! #BlackCouples #FYP #Explore #CAU
As 2024 ushers in a wave of promise and revitalized energy, we couldn't resist tapping into Pinky's infectious optimism, asking her to sum up what she wants 2024 to be in one phrase. “2024 will be mind, body, and spirit. For a long time, I had mind and spirit, okay, so I got a good mind, I got a good spirit, but the body piece– I'm not talking about weight loss. I'm talking about being mindful of the things that I consume and my physical,” she explained.
“When we talk about mind, body, and spirit, that’s the whole package. You think about Angela Bassett, mind, body, and spirit when you think about Viola Davis, mind, body, and spirit. So, now, when you think about Pinky Cole Hayes, you’re going to think about mind, body, and spirit because that is the motto for 2024.”
As Pinky's journey unfolds, she epitomizes the modern-day superhero: a dedicated mom, a culinary trailblazer, and a relentless force for change. Amidst the whirlwind of motherhood, she found herself again, not just as Pinky Cole but as the visionary behind Slutty Vegan and an expanding empire. Her evolution resonates deeply with the balancing act many mothers face—nurturing families while nurturing dreams.
Personally, I find myself inspired by Pinky's ability to leverage her network, community, and social platforms to drive her business forward. She's not just building a brand; she's fostering a movement—one that celebrates inclusivity, innovation, and the boundless possibilities. Her recent expansion into ventures like Bar Vegan and American Sesh signifies not just culinary innovation, but a profound journey of collaboration and empowerment. As she navigates the delicate dance of entrepreneurship and motherhood, Pinky's story serves as a beacon of inspiration for us all.
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Feature image by Derek White/Getty Images for TV One