Beyonce has achieved an entire lifetime's worth of success in both her professional and personal life all by the age of 30. Her journey to this point is so inspirational. To help hercelebrate turning another year older, we've put together the 10 Most Powerful Lessons on Love, Life and Motherhood that we've learned from Beyonce.
Check out her most memorable quotes below!
1. There is Power in Partnership (aka Marriage!)
As a self-proclaimed feminist and humanist, some people were confused when Bey said this on her "Grown Woman" intro. Was Beyonce saying she needed her man to succeed? No. She was successful before her hubby, Shawn "Jay-Z" Carter. But did she need her husband to help "enhance" her as a business, brand and wife? Yes. And vice-versa for Jay-Z. Bey also stated in her 2014 "Yours and Mine" documentary:
"People feel like they lose something when they get married, but it doesn't have to be that way. There's nothing more exciting than having a witness to your life... Men and women balance each other out, and we have to get to a point where we are comfortable with appreciating each other
Everybody's not good at everything. It's okay to depend on someone. It's actually what we're supposed to do, we're supposed to depend on each other. And when you find the person that you trust and you love and you feel is going to respect you and take all of the sh-t you have and turn it around and bring out the best in you, it feeds you. It is the most powerful thing you can ever feel in your life.
2. There is Power in Knowing Your Purpose (and according to Beyonce, she discovered her purpose through motherhood)
During an interview with Anderson Cooper a few years ago, a then-new mommy Bey opened up about her love for motherhood and how it has added to her as a mother and overall being.
"We all have our purpose...[Having a daughter] just gives you purpose and all of the things that my self-esteem was associated with, it's all completely different.
[With Blue], I realized why I was born and more than anything all of the things I want to pass onto my child and the best way of doing that is not by preaching or telling her but showing her by example, which is one of the reasons I'm here."
Amazing! As a public figure, it's so important that at the end of the day, leaving an impression on her daughter means more to Beyonce than being impressive as a celeb. Not that she has to try too hard anyway. This definitely gets filed under "The Power of Prioritizing," too. Family first!
3. There is Power in Privacy ("I feel like I'm the property of the public")
Although Bey has certainly learned to live a life of balance, (which is evident from her Tumblr page of various family vacations and the fact that Blue probably has more stamps in her passport at 3 than any of us will ever have in a lifetime), it hasn't been easy being "Bey." The things that come easy to us, come hardest for her. Including a life of privacy- which she forfeited for fame.
"Before I was famous I was a girl, on the heel with a guitar, I was the girl that just wanted a beautiful view of the beach, and now that I'm famous it's really really difficult to do really simple things. I think [privacy] was the hardest thing to give up."
4. There is Power in the ... "Possession" of a Woman
During her Mrs. Carter world tour, Beyonce gave an epic introduction to her "Naughty Girl," track, and it went a little something like this:
“When you become a woman you celebrate who you are and know that sensuality is a gift. This gift gives you power. This power that you can manipulate. This power can celebrate. What would you do with this power? Would you let go? would you surrender? I can make you surrender. If you make the right selection the passion can intensify like a drug. Are you high right now? Can you reach me? Harnessing the power of your body requires responsibility seduction is much more than beauty, it is generous, it is intelligence, it is mysterious, [&] it is exclusive."
5. There is Power in the Process of Success (aka- What "Sleep?")
As a woman who has racked up a whopping 452 total awards in her lifetime, Beyonce is in no way, shape, or form anything less than half woman, half amazing. And of course that doesn't come without a bit of sacrifice:
"I am a workaholic and I don't believe in 'no.' I don't believe in I need to sleep. If I'm not sleeping nobody's sleeping. I'm one human being. It's a lot. If I want to be a businesswoman, I'm a businesswoman. Independence is not easy."
Any questions?
6. There is Power in Pride
After nearly 20 years in the industry, there are a few things that Beyonce has said about independence and having your own, as taught by none other than, "Mama" Tina Knowles:
"My mother always taught me to be strong and to never be a victim, never make excuses, never expect anyone else to provide for me things I can provide for myself. Your self worth is determined by you. You don't have to depend on someone telling you who you are."
Along with our personal favorite, which she once told to Oprah shortly after her marriage to hubby Jay-Z in 2006: "Make sure you have your own life before becoming someone else's wife!" Yes, Bey!
7. There is Power in Pain
"If I hadn't gone through some of the painful experiences in my life, I would not be me."
Beyonce knows a thing or two about pain, conflict and having fear, but she also knows a thing or two about healing and having faith. In her '"Yours and Mine" mini documentary which Bey filmed in honor of the one year anniversary of her self-entitled album, she went on to say:
"I was brought up seeing my mother trying to please and make everyone comfortable. And I always felt like it was my job to fix the problem. A people-pleaser. But I'm no longer afraid of conflict, and I don't think conflict is a bad thing. Because I know that when you grow up, when you learn a few things, you're no longer afraid of letting go, you're no longer afraid of the unknown. You're no longer afraid of going to certain places in your mind and your body and your soul that might make you uncomfortable. And it all starts when you can look in the mirror and say, 'I like that person, you know?'"
8. There is Power in Perception
Beauty is deeper than skin deep and if there is one person who knows that, it is the woman who created the tracks "Flawless" and "Flaws and All," - beautifully ironic, right? Ever the self-proclaimed feminist, Beyonce has once gone on record in her songs and interviews, not only praising the beauty of women everywhere, but embracing their strengths too:
"The most alluring thing a woman can have is confidence," while also saying: "We have to reshape our own perception of how we see ourselves. We have to step up as women and take the lead."
9. There is Power in Imperfection ("Perfection is a disease of the nation.")
"The reality is: sometimes you lose. And you're never too good to lose. You're never too big to lose. You're never too smart to lose. It happens."
Simply said: You win some, you lose some but in the end, only the blessed get to live another day. And another day, means new opportunities. If at first you don't succeed, simply dust yourself off an try again!
10. There is Power in... Power!
"Power is not given to you, you have to take it!"
In a xoNecoleexclusive, the iconic actress opens up about embracing this season of her life, new projects, and overall being a “bad motherfucker.” Gabrielle reveals that she was 37 years old when she was diagnosed with perimenopause and is still going through it at 51 years old. Mayo Clinic says perimenopause “refers to the time during which your body makes the natural transition to menopause, marking the end of the reproductive years.”
“I haven't crossed over the next phase just yet, but I think part of it is when you hear any form of menopause, you automatically think of your mother or grandmother. It feels like an old-person thing, but for me, I was 37 and like not understanding what that really meant for me. And I don't think we focus so much on the word menopause without understanding that perimenopause is just the time before menopause,” she tells us.
Gabrielle Union
Photo by Brian Thomas
"But you can experience a lot of the same things during that period that people talk about, that they experienced during menopause. So you could get a hot flash, you could get the weight gain, the hair loss, depression, anxiety, like all of it, mental health challenges, all of that can come, you know, at any stage of the menopausal journey and like for me, I've been in perimenopause like 13, 14 years. When you know, most doctors are like, ‘Oh, but it's usually about ten years, and I'm like, ‘Uhh, I’m still going (laughs).’”
Conversations about perimenopause, fibroids, and all the things that are associated with women’s bodies have often been considered taboo and thus not discussed publicly. However, times are changing, and thanks to the Gabrielle’s and the Tia Mowry’s, more women are having an authentic discourse about women’s health. These open discussions lead to the creation of more safe spaces and support for one another.
“I want to be in community with folks. I don't ever want to feel like I'm on an island about anything. So, if I can help create community where we are lacking, I want to be a part of that,” she says. “So, it's like there's no harm in talking about it. You know what I mean? Like, I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change. I'm just getting better and stronger and more intelligent, more wise, more patient, more compassionate, more empathetic. All of that is very, very welcomed, and none of it should be scary.”
The Being Mary Jane star hasn’t been shy about her stance on therapy. If you don’t know, here’s a hint: she’s all for it, and she encourages others to try it as well. She likens therapy to dating by suggesting that you keep looking for the right therapist to match your needs. Two other essential keys to her growth are radical transparency and radical acceptance (though she admits she is still working on the latter).
"I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change."
Gabrielle Union and Kaavia Union-Wade
Photo by Monica Schipper/Getty Images
“I hope that a.) you recognize that you're not alone. Seek out help and know that it's okay to be honest about what the hell is happening in your life. That's the only way that you know you can get help, and that's also the only other way that people know that you are in need if there's something going on,” she says, “because we have all these big, very wild, high expectations of people, but if they don't know what they're actually dealing with, they're always going to be failing, and you will always be disappointed. So how about just tell the truth, be transparent, and let people know where you are. So they can be of service, they can be compassionate.”
Gabrielle’s transparency is what makes her so relatable, and has so many people root for her. Whether through her TV and film projects, her memoirs, or her social media, the actress has a knack for making you feel like she’s your homegirl. Scrolling through her Instagram, you see the special moments with her family, exciting new business ventures, and jaw-dropping fashion moments. Throughout her life and career, we’ve seen her evolve in a multitude of ways. From producing films to starting a haircare line to marriage and motherhood, her journey is a story of courage and triumph. And right now, in this season, she’s asking, “What’s next?”
“This is a season of discovery and change. In a billion ways,” says the NAACP Image Award winner. “The notion of like, ‘Oh, so and so changed. They got brand new.’ I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
"I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
She continues, “So I'm just trying to figure out what's next. You know what I mean? I'm jumping into what's next. I'm excited going into what's next and new. I'm just sort of embracing all of what life has to offer.”
Look out for Gabrielle in the upcoming indie film Riff Raff, which is a crime comedy starring her and Jennifer Coolidge, and she will also produce The Idea of You, which stars Anne Hathaway.
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Feature image by Mike Lawrie/Getty Images
