Why Aren't We Talking About The Death Of Korryn Gaines?
In August of 2016, a mother lost her daughter, two children lost their parent, and a 23-year-old woman lost her life. That woman was Maryland native, Korryn Gaines. Whether you've heard her name before now or this is your first time, it's clear that we haven't said her name enough.
A little more than two years ago, Korryn Gaines was shot and killed while holding her five-year-old son in a Baltimore apartment after a six-hour standoff with police officers. Although the offending officer was not charged criminally, he was found guilty by a jury in a civil trial in February of 2018 and ordered to pay the Gaines family $37 million.
Although this may have been a small victory in the Black community's fight against police violence, it was short lived. It was recently announced that a Maryland judge has now decided to overturn the settlement, saying that Officer Royce Ruby was "objectively reasonable" in his decision to fatally shoot Korryn Gaines, who had been previously declared mentally ill, and inadvertently harm her young son.
My aim in writing this article is not to pick apart the details or criticize the decisions of either party. Even though I could easily take it there, I won't mention the fact that police initially only showed up at Korryn's door to serve a misdemeanor traffic warrant or the fact that dangerous suspects have been apprehended before without being fatally shot. I won't talk about critics of Korryn, who feel that there were things she could have done differently to protect the lives of both her and her son.
But what I do want to know is, why aren't we talking about it?
Although Korryn's story is much different from the other members of our community that we've lost to gun violence, we must acknowledge this tragedy for exactly what it is: Oppression. Regardless of the details of that tragic day, can we all agree that a young woman's civil liberties were violated?
Yet, the narrative has been spun so that we are more likely to come up with the reasons she deserved to die, rather than all of the reasons why she deserved to live.
The media is so infatuated with acts of violence against Black bodies, that it's become a sort of porn for digital users. We've become so desensitized to these deaths, that we've stopped saying their names. Our anger as Black women has evolved into numbness, and we find ways to justify our abusers in an effort to satiate our rage.
The question I'd like to ask is, what if Korryn were your sister, cousin, or best friend? Despite your critique of how she could have done things differently, would she still deserve to die? It's my personal opinion that the Black community as a whole has a tendency to be much more critical of Black women, even in the cases of their own murder.
There are a few ways to remedy this. First, we must prioritize mental health as Black women. The day Korryn was shot, it was reported that she had skipped her medication. Although erratic behavior is not justification for murder, we have to confront mental illness head-on so that we have some control in these chaotic situations.
Secondly, let's stop playing respectability politics when it comes to the issue of Black death. Korryn Gaines had beliefs that were not socially acceptable, and that's what made her dangerous.
I will keep it G with you. It makes no difference to me how Korryn could or should have acted. I will hold the boys in blue accountable for every death that could have been prevented.
I challenge you today to not look for the flaw in your sisters, but to see them as human and say their names. The Gaines family plans to appeal the judge's decision, and our hopes and prayers are with them on their journey to justice.
- Judge Overturns $38M Settlement To Korryn Gaines Family - YouTube ›
- Judge dismisses $38 million civil case in death of Korryn Gaines ›
- Judge Overturns $37 Million Settlement In Death Of Korryn Gaines ›
- Judge overturns $37 million award in death of Korryn Gaines ›
- Baltimore County Judge Overturns Korryn Gaines $38 Million ... ›
- Baltimore County Judge Overturns Korryn Gaines $38 Million ... ›
- Judge Overturns $38M Verdict In Civil Lawsuit Filed By Family Of ... ›
- Judge Overturns $38 Million Settlement To Korryn Gaines' Family ... ›
- Judge overturns $38M verdict in lawsuit over Baltimore County ... ›
- Judge overturns $37+M settlement to Korryn Gaines' family | WBFF ›
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Why We'll Probably Never Hear Lupita Nyong'o Share Her Relationship With The World
Lupita Nyong'o is sharing a transparent look into her life after a recent breakup.
In a cover story for NET-A-PORTER, the A Quiet Place: Day One star shed light on the significant heartbreak she experienced following the end of her relationship with ex-boyfriend and TV host, Selema Masekela.
As a public figure, Nyong'o, 39, sought to divulge the news of the breakup in hopes of presenting a more authentic perspective on the pain that follows a separation.
"I was living in a lot of pain and heartbreak," she told the publication. "I looked at the environment of my social media and thought I don’t want to be a part of this illusion that everything is always coming up roses. Surely there is a lesson for me to learn in this, and I just want to be real about it."
The Black Panther star went on to explain that her choice to be transparent with her fans about her breakup came from the certainty she felt after ending the relationship. “In my mind, when I shared my relationship status with the world, it was because I felt sure about it,” she said.
While she didn’t know how the news would land with her fans, she found relief in knowing she wasn’t alone in her experience.
“I knew how it could be interpreted; I knew it would have a life of its own,” she reflects. “But then I started to see the comments and people were being so loving and supportive. The ones that moved me the most were other people sharing their pain and their heartbreak.”
Nyong'o and Masekela went Instagram official in December 2022, publicly announcing their relationship in a couple's video. In October 2023, Nyong'o took to her personal Instagram account to share the news of her breakup in her caption, writing, "At this moment, it is necessary for me to share a personal truth and publicly dissociate myself from someone I can no longer trust.”
She continued the vulnerable note, "I find myself in a season of heartbreak because of a love suddenly and devastatingly extinguished by deception. I am tempted to run into the shadows and hide, only to return to the light when I have regained my strength enough for me to say, 'Whatever, my life is better this way.' But I am reminded that the magnitude of the pain I am feeling is equal to the measure of my capacity for love."
These days, Nyong'o tells NET-A-PORTER that she is prioritizing profound self-discovery that extends beyond her career. She notes having a deliberate and unhurried approach to understanding herself.
She also alludes to keeping her relationships private moving forward after noting it was "very, very sage" of her not to talk about her private life professionally in the days before her last relationship. "I'm going back to those days by the way," Nyong'o shares of her reinstated boundaries around her personal life.
Earlier this month, Nyong'o made headlines alongside her new boyfriend actor Joshua Jackson. Nyong'o and Jackson went through public splits from their respective SOs in October 2023, with the latter splitting from his long-time partner Jodie Turner-Smith following her divorce filing from the Dawson's Creek alum.
The pair have been spotted together as early as December 2023, but nothing screamed "couple" quite as loudly as their recent getaway to Mexico for Nyong'o's 41st birthday featuring passionate displays of affection.
"Our purpose in life is to love. And so you have to get back in it," she tells the outlet, seemingly alluding to her budding new romance.
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Featured image by Taylor Hill/Getty Images