Women of today are more sexually liberated than the women before us, however, there are moments when we millennials can get a little shy when speaking on our sexual appetites. What subconscious pleasures really turn you on? Some women like passionate and gentle love-making, others like it wild and rough. Maybe you lowkey like a strong spiritual connection, or perhaps naughty role playing gets you going. Read on to learn your hidden libido turn-on, based on your zodiac sign!
What Turns On An Aries
Make-up sex really gets the Aries nature in you riled up! After getting into a heated argument with your partner, one of the first things that comes to your dirty little mind, is how good the make-up sex is going to be! Aries women like things to go their way, and when things are leaning in the other direction, you know that you can use your magical sexual prowess to get things back in order. You know that make-up sex is bound to happen, and there is a part of you that makes a devious inward smirk after a fight with your lover, because you know it's about to be on and poppin'.
Pro Tip: If you and your boo are going through a little riff and you want to make it right, when you know they are coming home, leave a little trail of sweets from the door to the bedroom, and allow your honeypot to be the last treat.
What Turns On A Gemini
Gemini, you are the boss in bed! Subconsciously knowing that you are calling the shots really turns you on. Riding on top is likely to be one of your favorite positions. Your Gemini spirit loves the idea of being the dominant partner. You like to control the flow of love-making. You might even secretly like constraining your partner's hands so that you have free reign. If and when you decide to be more submissive, it's only because you said so...and that is how you like it.
Pro Tip: Give your lover a freaky clock-in text and tell them to report to work. Once they do, they will receive their nightly task in the bedroom.
What Turns On A Taurus
In everyday life, the Taurus woman is tough as nails, but in between the sheets, you melt just like hot chocolate when it comes to romantic and playful love-making. Being deeply in love and comfortable with your partner turns you on the most! You like being soft, sexy, and feminine. You like laughing and you like talking in between positions. You like gazing in your lover's eyes. Subconsciously, you love to let loose and have fun when you are getting it in.
Pro Tip: Tell your lover that a new burlesque club has opened up in the living room and the show starts at 11:11. They'd better be on time, if they want front row seats.
What Turns On A Cancer
The Cancer spirit in you loves the thrill of an unexpected and mysterious sexual escapade. Subconsciously, you are turned on by the fact that you and your partner both know that y'all came for one thing and one thing only. You likely love listening to steamy, seductive, driving melodies that seem to dictate the speed at which you groove on it. Discovering the little sexual secrets about your partner's body, takes you on an intoxicating trip leading to an infinite destination of bliss.
Pro Tip: Invite your lover on a little road trip to a private spot on the beach or a park and get frisky on the way there.
What Turns On A Leo
Leo women like it all about them. You subconsciously enjoy being ravished and worshipped. Your body is a temple, and your partner understands that they are in your house. You expect your lover to pull out all the stops in making sure that your pleasure is achieved. When your lover goes out of the way to cater to you, your body responds like Mother Earth herself. All of your volcanoes erupt, the waves of your waters collide, your winds blow, and your flowers bloom.
Pro Tip: Go on a couples' pedicure and massage date, then have them suck your toes and rub you down later on.
What Turns On A Virgo
The Virgo energy in you is subconsciously turned on when your partner says all the right things, and touches all the right places. You are a sucker for foreplay, and not just when you get in that bedroom...Virgos like to start the sexual experience way before they even hit the sheets. Receiving little dirty text messages about what's going down later on will drive a Virgo crazy! If you see a Virgo woman devilishly smiling to herself with her phone in hand throughout the day, best believe that she has a freaky appointment scheduled for later on.
Pro Tip: Send your boo a dirty text every hour on the hour, then see what that mouth do at the end of the day.
What Turns On A Libra
Nothing quite stirs a Libra woman up like a passionate night of revenge sex. After being hurt by someone you were intimate with, sex with someone else, regardless of whether they're connected to your partner or not, subconsciously gets your ocean flowing. This is an energy of "sex with no strings attached." This may not be your ideal long-term situation, but it gets the job done in the best way when you need it.
Pro Tip: Find every strong surface in your apartment, and go to town!
What Turns On A Scorpio
Scorpios are known for connecting with other people through the sacral chakra, which carries spiritual and sexual energies. Nothing turns the Scorpio woman on more than, a deep energetic and spiritual connection with their partner. Subconsciously, feeling like you are completely in sync with your lover in ways that cannot be explained with words, will have a Scorpio speaking in tongues.
Pro Trip: Buy a book on spiritual tantra for sexual meditation techniques, light some candles and some palo santo, play some Tibetan bell music, and sync your orgasms at the same time.
What Turns On A Sagittarius
The Sagittarius is an independent spirit, and that doesn't stop in the bedroom. Of course intimacy with someone else is adventurous and satisfying for her, but this self-starter likes to self-start, if you know what I mean… Before she can be pleased by anybody else, a Sagittarius is subconsciously turned on by pleasing herself. By knowing what she likes through trial and error, she is able to school her partner, for her own ultimate satisfaction. Don't be surprised if she gets it going without you.
Pro Tip: Take a trip to the sex shop together and buy yourselves new toys. Later on, test out your new buys and review them through dirty talk.
What Turns On A Capricorn
For a Capricorn, nothing is like that "good ole' thang," that "ole' reliable," or the one that your homegirls give you a shady side eye for dealing with. Subconsciously, your reasoning mind might feel like if the car drives well, is good on gas, and gets you from point A to point B, then why not take it for a little ride? Even if it's just once in a while. Sometimes all you need is a little tune up, or maybe a oil change, to get you back on track. You might regret it later, but that good-good is so worth it.
Pro Tip: Netflix and Sex: there will be no chilling.
What Turns On An Aquarius
Aquarius, nothing turns you on more than sex you ain't supposed to be having. This is that "on the low," "ain't nobody supposed to know," "out of sight out of mind" sex. Whether you or your partner for the moment is in a committed or an open relationship with someone else, or both of you want to keep it on a "need to know" basis, nothing revs you up more than a quick sexual rendezvous with a temporary partner. This is about breaking all the rules, and it ain't nobody else's business.
Pro Tip: Change the names of each other in your phones for a day to something ridiculous, and only communicate using those names when getting it in.
What Turns On A Pisces
Since the nature of the Pisces woman is as introverted as it is extroverted, you love to compartmentalize your lovers. Having one partner to fulfill one need, and another to fulfill something else, is your subconscious libido charger. You have your own team of sexual suitors, and you are the coach! The idea of being polyamorous is likely a fulfilling scenario for you because you can control the type of connection you have with each partner and give whomever no longer meshes with your vibe the pink slip when necessary.
Pro Tip: Schedule your lovers like night and day... literally.
All astrological Tarotscopes channeled via Melanade Stand's Tarot Cards! For your own Intuitive Channeled Healing Session, follow @Melanade_Stand on IG and send an inquiry via DM!
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It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
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As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
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Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
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And we are still shining.
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And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
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It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
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Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
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We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
Despite launching media careers from different pathways, the two New York-based women have forged a friendship where they can discuss their ambitions and challenges.
Both women are part of xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, recognized in the Viral Voices category for the impact they’ve made through storytelling, creativity, and authenticity. Together, they represent what it means to build an "It Girl" brand with integrity and depth. In the spirit of SheaMoisture’s "Yes, And" ethos, Les and Kayla embody the freedom to be multi-layered as women evolving boldly into every version of themselves.
This conversation has been condensed and lightly edited for clarity
On Forging Their Own Paths
Les Alfred: Being a Jane of all trades is incredibly challenging. And one of the challenges I've faced is that the scope of what podcasters now need to do has increased so much. When I first interviewed you in 2019, I was still very new at it, but I remember being on a Skype call with you from my bedroom in Seattle. That was how I ran the show. And that was good enough. That is absolutely not good enough these days. The scope and the quality keeps increasing, but the resources that you have don't necessarily increase in order to remain competitive.
I get asked so many questions from people who want to get into podcasts and they want to get started. Most of the time, I'm just like, 'I don't have tips for you.' Because, one, I don't know what it's like to start in this current environment. Two, I know what it takes to contend and be consistent in this environment. The barrier of entry is a lot higher in terms of having something of quality than it was before.
On Balancing Ambition and Rest
Kayla Greaves: I've had to make a very clear effort to slow down and just not take on as much. Yes, you're running a business, but you're also living your life. I had one of those days yesterday. I just laid down and listened to white noise for hours because I just needed my brain to just be clear. I called a friend. I cried.
I'm starting over again today. The sun is out. It's a new day. And that's just sometimes what you have to do. You can't show up for your audience or for other people, if you can't show for yourself. I think that creativity comes from a place of living your life and having genuine experiences, and then sharing those experiences through your art.
"I had to give myself permission to let myself grow publicly in ways that I'd already done personally."
Courtesy
On Evolving Through Growth and Rebranding
Les: I didn't create Balanced Black Girl until 2018, but I started blogging and creating content and doing things under the Balanced brand in 2014. I was 24 years old at the time. Now, I'm 36. The things that were important to me, the perspective that I had and the stories I wanted to tell were entirely different. I think I had to give myself permission to let myself grow publicly in ways that I'd already done personally. The show isn't really about wellness anymore. And that shift started happening a couple of years ago.
When we started expanding into more lifestyle topics, more self-help topics [and] talking about entrepreneurship, the audience responded really well. That was when the show really started to grow and take off. And that was what got so much more engagement than the episodes back in 2020 when I was doing hour-long deep dives on gut health.
Rebranding the show was something I've been thinking about for a long time. When I was finally like, 'Oh, I need to do this,' honestly, was the 2024 presidential election. I was like, these people are about to be in here acting crazy. I do not feel safe with my business name being what it is. I don't want to be targeted for any BS. We saw what they did to the Fearless Fund.
"You have to balance your integrity with your income."
Courtesy
On Integrity Over Income
Kayla: I have many other interests aside from beauty. I'm growing and I'm changing as a person. I'm not the same person I was when I started at InStyle in 2019 before the pandemic rocked everybody's world. I don't think reviewing every single lipstick that comes out is exciting or interesting, because everybody does it now, and everybody feels like they're qualified to speak on things that they're not qualified to speak on. I'm currently in that pain point of growth.
I don't think I have always been in environments where I've been encouraged to branch out on my own ideas. I finished Ina Garten’s memoir maybe a month ago. She kept repeating this quote in her book. She said, ‘What goes in early, goes in deep.’ Now that I'm on my own and I don't have the resources of a traditional media company, which is what I have become accustomed to, sometimes it's difficult for me to be like, 'Okay, just go ahead with the thing.'
I think, Les, just the other day, you reposted somebody saying that they let go of a five-figure deal and then got double the next day because it just didn't feel aligned for them. Those are the things that happen. I have to find a balance of, 'Okay, how do I keep myself afloat?' And that may mean I may not be balling out of control just yet, but I'm okay for now. I can buy myself nice things every once in a while, but you have to balance your integrity with your income.
Les: There are just certain lines that I'm not willing to cross. Especially when I created more wellness content, one of those lines was I will not promote any sort of weight loss product. All of these GLP-1s all want to advertise on my podcast. I actually have nothing against those types of products, but I don't ever want someone to look at what I'm putting into the world and think that I'm saying that they need to feel a certain way about their bodies.
Even if the money is great, that's not for me to say, and that's not the type of message that I want to put out here. Or, I had another kind of brand deal come through that would have required me to divulge things about my personal life that I just don't really want my audience knowing about me, and bringing them along on journeys that I just find personal and I want to keep offline. I don’t want to be known for dragging my mess all over the internet for a buck.
I don't want to be known for being an influencer. I would love to be 1,000% in on my podcast, scale it, have it grow to be a media empire where I'm producing and putting out other bodies of work. For now, until that other side of the business really picks up and gets to the point where I want it to be, I kind of need to play the influencer game a little bit to live in this expensive city. But I'm gonna do it on my terms. It's a constant compromise that I'm coming to with myself.
"You can never make a big vision come to fruition if you're sitting and you're waiting for somebody else to tell you exactly what to do."
Courtesy
On Mutual Admiration and Friendship
Les: Something that I really admire about you in having known you for the past couple of years is you don't wait for a roadmap. You jump in, you roll up your sleeves, and you do it. You can never make a big vision come to fruition if you're sitting and you're waiting for somebody else to tell you exactly what to do.
Kayla: Well, first of all, I want to say thank you for saying that, because that means so much to me, and it's very affirming. That's exactly how I feel about you. I remember, even at your first live show, you're like, ‘Oh my god, I'm so stressed. I don't know what I'm doing.’ And, the shit sold out. And, you know, and now, like, you see the growth of the podcast. And you have nearly 61,000 subscribers on YouTube. I just checked recently.
I talk a lot about people that really just need to not say anything on the internet, because it's so frustrating as somebody who grew up as a traditional journalist. You want people to fact check and ask thoughtful questions and have good conversations. I've never said that about you. I've always loved your podcast. And I've sent a lot of your episodes to friends when they're going through specific things that you're talking about.
This season has been a little bit slower to me, so you've been a constant source of inspiration, and it's just been such a pleasure to see your podcast grow despite the challenges you've had. I know it's not easy, but you continue to grow and continue to push through, and I really admire that as somebody who sat and cried yesterday and listened to white noise.
And this is why I tell you all the time, you really do inspire me. I love you a lot.
Les: Oh my gosh, I love you a lot. I'm so glad that the podcast brought us together.
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image courtesy