The question, "Who are you?" keeps showing up in my life. And to be honest, I am not always sure how to respond. Most recently, I have been approaching everything in my life with more intentionality because without it life seems chaotic. I think we have all been stretched in 2020 but I also believe that the stretching is going to catapult us into our best selves, similar to a bow and arrow. The harder the stretch, the further the distance.
Intentionality is just half the journey. We gotta put our actions where our intentions are. That's where the Mindful Moon Deck comes in.
What Is A Mindful Moon Deck?
Mindful Moon Deck/Marsha B.
Moondecks are affirmation decks focused on helping you become more aligned with yourself and your journey of discovery. For many, it serves as a self-love ritual, making it a great investment if you're looking to find peace and power through powerful mantras. Many are reasonably priced and offer a sense of contemplation that can only be deemed as instrumental.
This specific Mindful Moondeck is not like a regular moondeck. The set of 50 cards longs to be the inspiration and motivation needed to get shit done. From a reality check to words of wisdom, you can count on each card to push you into introspection. Most importantly, it was created by a black woman. Writer and Introvert N The City founder, Marsha B, designed this deck as she began to explore spirituality and what it meant for her in her life. She recognized there were areas in her that needed healing. Marsha shared with xoNecole:
"Essentially exploring spirituality is exploring your healing. During my journey, I used different affirmations that helped me really get in-tuned with myself. Not your typical 'I am' affirmations, but the ones that penetrate your soul."
"The ones that remind you to be gentle with yourself when you make a mistake. The ones that are real with you when you're in denial with yourself. I took those affirmations and made a 50-card deck. Each quote is rooted in grace and love for yourself, while giving grace and love to others," she continued.
In Marsha's experience, some people pull a card a day for their daily inspiration, while some pick a card when they need direction from the universe. Then, there are the people who use the deck as a clarifying card during tarot readings. For this millennial New Yorker, as she grows on her spiritual journey, she has began to incorporate a lot of what she experiences into her brand. Marsha says, "My online store also carries sage, incense, and crystals because they're great tools to use when you want to channel positive energy. I want to market high vibes and spirituality."
How The Moon Deck Works
Mindful Moon Deck/Marsha B.
- Shuffle the cards.
- Pull a card in the morning to set the tone for the rest of your day.
- Pull a card in times of uncertainty, or when inspiration is needed.
How The Mindful Moon Deck Got My Self-Care Routine Together
Joce Blake/xoNecole
I have been struggling with anxiety for some time now. It wasn't until I moved to Denver and had more time with myself that I was able to name it. In the past, I just thought it was natural to worry about everything all the time. I even thought that it was sign of failure.
My therapist said something in our last session that I can't get out of my head:
"Black women don't often recognize that they're struggling with depression or anxiety.
Instead, they think they're failing."
— Injera Mami🇪🇹 (@GloriaAlamrew) https://twitter.com/GloriaAlamrew/status/131473344...">October 10, 2020
Over the past two years, I have been trying to find ways and things that keep me grounded. In doing this, I have found that my soul really values having a physical resource that promotes love and light. The actual practice of pulling a card from the deck helped calm my anxiety. I decided that since it was a moment of stillness, I should add meditation to the routine. Meditation has always been a struggle for me because my mind wanders; having something to focus on – the Moon Deck card – was profound.
Adding the Moon Deck to my other self-preservation practices like writing in my self-care journal has increased my compassion towards myself. After reading a card, I feel more centered and ready to tackle whatever the universe throws at me. When I miss a day and don't pull a card, I can feel the difference because my day seems longer and my heart and soul feel heavier. I am so grateful to have this practice a part of my self-love ritual.
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Since it’s Stress Awareness Month, we caught up with Keanne Owens, LCSW, founder of Journey To Harmony Therapy Center, to talk about these triggers and what Black women can do to manage and cope.
Owens is an experienced South Florida-based counselor and social worker who offers her services via Grow Therapy, a therapy and medication management platform. She has worked with Black women professionals to unpack issues related to workplace stressors. “One is the pressure to perform–having to meet deadlines and deliverables. And a lot of times, these subtle stressors from performance are put upon ourselves as Black women. We want to make sure we’re doing our best. We don’t want to be critiqued in certain ways.”
Excessive micromanagement leading to fear of overly critical bosses is another subtle trigger that can negatively impact Black women in the workplace.
“Whenever something is done wrong, or we experience some type of injustice and have to report it, it’s the fear of retaliation–[fear that] we won’t be taken seriously or [our words] will be taken out of context because of being deemed as the ‘angry Black woman,’” she said.
Black Women And Workplace Stress Triggers
Her sentiments are backed by research. A recent report by Coqual found that 28% of Black women (compared to 17% of White men) say their supervisor uses “excessive control or attention to detail” when managing them. There’s more: A survey by the National Employment Law Project found that Black workers were “more likely to have concerns (80 percent) and twice as likely as white workers (18 percent) to have unresolved concerns at work, with 39 percent reporting they were “not satisfied with the employer’s response or did not raise concerns for fear of retaliation.”
The survey also found that 14 percent of Black respondents said they “avoided raising concerns to their employer for fear of retaliation—more than twice the average rate of 6 percent for all survey respondents.”
Owens pointed to the fact that these subtle stress triggers can negatively impact our physical health and our career advancement. “A lot of time it’ll affect our productivity,” Owens added. “We start to have negative thoughts of ourselves. The stressors can also cause fatigue. We’re no longer meeting or working up to our desired potential.” Other challenges as a result include insomnia and increased insolation, withdrawal, and lack of motivation to apply for jobs or promotions even when qualified.
valentinrussanov/Getty Images
How To Manage Subtle Stress Triggers
While there are systemic issues at play for Black women at work that has less to do with us and more to do with major overhauls that must be addressed by the powers that be, there are steps we can take for the betterment of ourselves and our mental health. Owens offered the following tips:
Tap into a support system, whether it’s a coworker you trust, a family member, an organization, or an outlet like a hobby.
Create a good work-life balance before burnout even starts. “Having certain boundaries [is the goal] such as, for example, if you get off at 5, you get off at 5. If your job description is this, you don’t go above and beyond because that brings you to a lot of burnout,” Owens said.
Prioritize self-care, whatever that means for you. “If you don’t have a routine, create one. Practice mindfulness and even some meditation,” she added.
Create structure in your life outside of work. “Even if you have a family, applying some structure in your routine helps relieve stress,” she said.
Get into grounding techniques. “Do a real quick square breathing exercise, that’s literally 30 seconds, or you can do a grounding technique that’s less than two minutes, right there where you are. You don’t need any other materials. That’s something you can do with just yourself and your body.”
Ask for help. “As Black women, we don’t ask for help enough,” she said. “Find where you need to ask for help. A lot of times, people think that’s indicative of weakness, but we need to rewrite that narrative. It’s okay to ask for help where you see fit. [If] you’re a mom, [it could be] every Wednesday from 5 to 6, your children are with the dad. You have to carve out that time.”
For more information on Grow Therapy, visit their website. You can also find out more about Keanne Owens, LCSW, via BeginYourJourneyToHarmony.com.
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