"In the name of Jesus, I bind and rebuke the spirit of depression, loneliness, self-doubt, worry, suicide, and frustration."
Whew, chile! After all of that praying and tarrying in the Spirit, sweating, oil rubbing and slinging, doing the ugly cry, calling down fire from heaven, and finally that hug -- that sweet hug of comfort -- we leave the altar with swollen eyes, a damp Kleenex and confidence that that prayer was IT! We are finally free from depression and suicidal thoughts.
But are we really?
You see, sis, I'm going to tell you something very important about depression that your Pastor or ministry leader will not tell you. And not because they forgot or don't want to tell you, but simply because they either do not have personal experience with depression, they do and have not yet received help for it, or they have the mentality that prayer and being around the saints is a good resolve for depression.
So, here's the truth:
Depression doesn't go away...ever.
OK, now that we have that out the way, let's talk.
For my Black girls who have considered suicide as a result of depression, mental illness can cripple your lifestyle socially, physically, and spiritually if you do not reach for help beyond prayer. Although the prior statement may seem like doom, let this one inspire you: There is hope. Life does get better.
You can believe in your Higher Power out loud and cope successfully with depression. How do I know? Because I live this life every day. And I've come to realize that yes, asking God to help me with my depression and suicidal tendencies has helped me tremendously. But only because I coupled that prayer with practical actions. Faith without action won't work...come on Church!
As a Black woman and minister, I have realized five important things about coping with depression:
- I can be a believer and still be depressed...and that is OK. Really honey, it is.
- I can get help to deal and cope with depression in a productive and positive manner from people and/or organizations that are not faith-based. If one more person tells me to just pray about it...chile.
- Activating my faith to cope with depression requires me to actually get up, get out, and start doing something about it. Joining a support group with like-minded individuals is LIFE! Creating a positive environment within my personal space (sage, lavender, sandalwood, anyone?) helps with your mood.
- Negative thoughts that creep into your mind when you are out living your best life will happen because depression does not go away. However, you have the power to change your thoughts to something positive.
- Choosing to use medicine your medical provider recommends is OK! If it helps you, use it and yes, you can still believe in your Higher Power and pray, girlfriend!
So, how are you going to live your life? Suffer in silence or thrive out loud? I choose the latter.
If you or someone you know is currently experiencing dark or suicidal thoughts, know that there is hope. Call the 24/7 free National Suicidal Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. You can find additional resources here.
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Luckily, I got the opportunity. Along with dropping JAGUAR II, which features the viral single “On My Mama,” Victoria also announced The Jaguar Tour, and as soon as the tickets dropped, it quickly sold out. I attended her Atlanta show at the Buckhead Theatre, and besides being met with a sea of concertgoers from wall to wall, my ears were immediately hit with a beautiful voice from none other than Alex Vaughn, who opened for the mother of one. Once Alex finished her set, it was time for the main event.
Victoria Monét
Photo by Paras Griffin/Getty Images
As soon as Victoria stepped on stage, it was hers. She commanded the room with her sultry voice and hypnotic dance moves, performing songs from albums JAGUAR I and II and previous projects such as Life After Love, Pt. 1. Fans were singing her songs word for word to the point where, at times, you no longer heard her singing. However, it was clear that she was in a room filled with love and support, and she also showed it back on stage. The singer rarely took breaks in between songs and dazzled fans with her smooth moves that is reminiscent of the legendary Janet Jackson.
One of my favorite moments was when she performed “Cadillac (A Pimp’s Anthem).” She dressed in a trench coat and fedora, complete with her pimp cane, and another big moment was when she performed “Stop (Askin’ Me 4Shyt)”. Overall, it was nice to vibe out to live performances of some of my personal faves like “Ass Like That,” “How Does It Make You Feel,” “Alright,” and “Big Boss.” In a recent cover story for Galore, Victoria revealed what she hopes concert attendees walk away with.
“On tour, I really wanna give people the best version of Victoria on stage, better than I’ve ever been before. I’m hoping people have the time of their life at the show,” she said. After working behind the scenes as a songwriter for so long, the California native now has all eyes on her, and it’s clear she was ready for this moment.
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Feature image by Paras Griffin/Getty Images
