How Kellee Edwards Became The Host Of Her Own Travel Show
The first time Kellee Edwards fell in love with travel was in the backseat of her parent's car. Buildings faded to beach scenery on her left, and neighborhoods gave way to mountain views on her right as they drove up the 405 towards San Simeon, home of the historic landmark Hearst Castle.
"My parents weren't able to buy plane tickets and fly around the world, so they provided what they could, which was the foundation—and a very important one at that. They opened me up to having the curiosity for more."
They probably, at the time, didn't imagine that their baby girl would one day fly herself around the world as a pilot, one of few black women to do so since Bessie Coleman pioneered her way into a plane in 1921. They likely didn't expect her to become a certified scuba diver, or foresee her breaking barriers as the first African-American woman to host her own show on the Travel Channel.
Courtesy of Kelle Edwards
Her list of accomplishments? Amazing.
And what she's done as a black woman in a white, male-dominated industry where black people are often counted out despite our estimated $50 billion annual contributions is nothing short of inspiring. But neither defines who she is. Instead, they speak to deeper characteristics that have enabled the adventure traveler to land on our television screens. She's a woman who is resilient and fearless, nonconforming and quite frankly, just plain badass.
I met Kellee at a small airport in Riverside in front of a private hangar owned by her mentor, also notably African-American. She's dressed in her signature outfit—green shorts, khaki tank top, jean vest, and a Ruby Red lip, full of vibrant energy that I instantly recognize from the numerous self-produced videos of her solo travels that grace the very same YouTube channel—the same videos that helped to get her in front of producers and television execs.
Courtesy of Kelle Edwards
Kellee's success didn't happen overnight. In fact, it's taken seven years for her to build what's just starting to get major press. Fresh out of California State University with a broadcast journalism degree, Kellee began putting her on-camera skills to the test. She worked as an entertainment reporter, snagging red carpet and junket interviews until one day she decided that keeping abreast of the latest gossip was depleting her energy.
So after five years, she quit.
"For me, personally, I just wanted to feel fulfilled and I was like, what type of journalism would feed my soul? I love traveling and adventure, is there a such thing as a travel journalist? I really wasn't sure."
She didn't wait to find out. She created what she didn't see.
Courtesy of Kelle Edwards
On weekdays, she worked in banking over New Accounts and Loans to fund her weekend travel adventures. "People have to understand that dream, you still have to keep a roof over your head. I moved out at 18 and I haven't been back to my parent's house. And so I had to work. You have to do what you have to do."
She saved her coins and jetset around the country, packing her tripod and camera to record her journeys along the way. Sometimes she did it solo, other times she bribed friends to come along and play videographer. Each visual was uploaded to her YouTube channel for the world to see.
But Kellee knew that mediocre wasn't going to cut it. If she wanted to stand out in the crowd of travel adventurists, she'd have to go hard or stay home. "One day I was like, you've got to up the ante a little bit. What's going to separate you from all of these people?"
While sitting at the Burbank airport waiting for her flight, Kellee caught a glimpse of a tiny airplane in the distance, taking off and landing amongst the larger 747s that flanked the runway.
"I found out later that's called a touch and go," she says with enthusiasm. "You literally touch your wheels on the ground and go back up and turn around, call the traffic pattern, and come back and land. I started doing research on taking flight lessons and I found out you can do something called a discovery flight, which is about $100 at any local airport. I won't lie; I got sick when I first went up. I'm used to being in normal airplanes where there's pressurization, but the views were so amazing, I was like whatever this feeling is I don't care, I'm going to figure out. And I was hooked! So I just decided to continue and get my pilot's license."
Courtesy of Kelle Edwards
With a scuba diving certification already under her belt and a new shiny pilot's license to match, Kellee found the sweet spot to her brand, and the very thing that separated her from her fellow travel journalists.
"I was like okay Kellee, that's your thing: travel and adventure by land, air, and sea. That's going to be your niche. And it's freaking worked. Being an African American pilot is very few and far in between, and being a woman period in aviation is even more minimal. So I definitely started to get the attention of people, and I was like I'd love to have a show on Travel Channel; that's like a one in a million chance."
Three years in, it seemed as if her dream of landing a show on the major travel network was no longer going to be a goal she pinned on her vision board. She signed her first deal with a production company, but six months later, all went quiet.
"No one really knew what to do with me," Kellee says. "I was very unique, so people were like yeah what you're doing is really cool, but at the end of the day this is a business, we have to see how this is going to translate in other ways."
It's not hard to imagine why, despite her infectious and daring personality, that mainstream had a hard time trying to box her in.
Courtesy of Kelle Edwards
"Listen, I'm a black woman and very proud of that. When you see me, you don't think I'm anything else. There's nothing about me that looks like I'm mixed with anything else. I love my chocolate skin, and I glisten and I glow, but seriously I feel like when you are one of the firsts, people are a bit selective in how they proceed. But what's funny is now they see this is working. And that's okay. I had so many no's—a yes one day and a no the next, it can mess with your mind. It was more emotionally draining—all of the ups and downs of being so close to something and then it being taken away from you. That was the test for myself because I could've easily given up."
Those moments are often where dreams become deferred, only to never actualize. The fight gets hard, damn hard. The sacrifices began to feel more like suffering, and progress can turn to pain when things don't go according to plan. For Kellee, it was yet another test—how bad did she really want it, and how hard was she willing to go?
"I was raised to believe I was special and unique, and so I'm very stubborn and I'm very persistent. You can tell me no if you want to, but I'm going to find a way. Even Travel Channel says we don't know why you're so surprised because you really had a mission to get a show with us. And it's happening.
"But for me it's like yes, I always saw that as the vision and I'm like if I keep doing what I'm doing, at some point they're not going to be able to ignore me."
Courtesy of Kelle Edwards
At the time, the Kellee Set Go brand was already gaining momentum. She initially started working with tourism boards and hotel chains, who would provide accommodations in exchange for video content, which helped to build up her personal website. As her brand grew, she also connected with travel PR companies and brands, and was later able to monetize those relationships.
"You have to build your content before you get paid, and that sometimes will take years. These brands will not mess with you unless they feel like they can get a return on investment (ROI). Once you start working with one brand, you can take it to the next one and then you go from there."
The brand has enabled Kellee to negotiate on her own terms when partnering with bigger companies—the connections with brands that took years to build relationships with are here to stay, she's not diluting her fast-talking, quirky personality, and she's going to rock her bright lipstick and short-cropped hair both on land and under water, thank you very much. And if those deal breakers can't be negotiated, she always has the brand that she built to fall back on.
"I could have a Travel Channel show today and nothing tomorrow, but I'll always have Kellee Set Go, and I make sure that it will always be mine, and never be owned by anyone else."
Courtesy of Kelle Edwards
The recent airing of Mysterious Islands has positioned Kellee at the center of a much-needed conversation on the importance of representation on the predominately white network, and in the travel sector as a whole.
"I have been told that they have never seen new talent with a new show get so much press in the history of the Travel Channel," Kellee confesses. "I know the conversation is changing. And I've been able to kind of like lock in a full sector of being an adventure traveler who's a woman and who's black, and so I made that my niche. And I want people to come up behind me and do the same thing and do it better. I'm not over here just trying to keep everything for myself. I think there's room for all of us. I hope I'm not the last black face that you see with a television show on Travel Channel. I hope that there are many more to come."
We hope so, too. And more importantly, we hope that the change doesn't stop with television. Because that same brown girl who was hard to sell because of her image, who fearlessly fought for a seat at the table, deserves to one day be beautifully packaged as a collectible for many more little brown girls to see that yeah, anything is possible.
Learn more about Kelle Edwards' career journey in the series Dope Chicks, Dope Jobs below.
Catch Kellee as the host of Mysterious Islandson Travel Channel. Follow her journey on Instagram @kelleesetgo.
Originally published on January 18, 2018
- Kellee Set Go! Travel & Adventure by Land, Air and Sea ›
- Kellee Edwards (@kelleesetgo) • Instagram photos and videos ›
- Get to Know Mysterious Islands' Kellee Edwards | Mysterious Islands ... ›
- Meet the Second Black Woman In History To Have Her Own Show ... ›
- Kellee Edwards talks Mysterious Islands - YouTube ›
Kiah McBride writes technical content by day and uses storytelling to pen real and raw personal development pieces on her blog Write On Kiah. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @writeonkiah.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Navigating Dating When Emotionally Unavailable & Detached: My Journey Back To Feeling
The last time I came with a dating story, I told you I got my little feelings hurt in 2021. I called myself trying to be out in these streets entertaining a man in a different area code, city, and state — only for homeboy to play in my damn face. So, I went and gave y’all "8 Rules To Casual Dating Every Woman Should Know This Summer." You’re welcome. Fast forward to 2024, and I am now coming to you from a more mature and intentional place. We’re not in summer yet, but I truly believe what blooms in spring, thrives in summer.
2023 was my year, and it was my turn. I had just completed an 8-month holistic detox. The glow-up was real and well-deserved. The way I have poured into myself is unmatched. Let me tell you, self-love is a love you have never known. After a five-year healing journey, I finally felt like myself again, and I was ready to play. My heart was open, my mind was clear, and my body hella transformed. I had told all my friends that I was ready to explore dating again, and at the height of summer, I did exactly just that.
This time I decided I wanted to take my time. I wanted to date the “right way” or the “healthy way.” You know, keep your options open, ask the right questions, believe actions and not words, observe patterns and pay attention to red, yellow, and green flags. I was never the dating app type of girl. I sincerely miss everything about human connection and dating from 2000 to 2012. Can we please bring all of that back into 2024? I prefer to feel a man’s energy and presence in real-time. Nonetheless, I still chose to dabble with a few dating apps. I was all the way outside and dating for practice.
Unfortunately, with today’s dating culture, social climate, and how some of these men move and/or behave, these dates were a dead end. Not one guy made it to my roster. What these men were was benched this season – not one of them could be my first-round select draft pick. It didn't seem like anyone I met was interested in a serious relationship. And it’s completely fine. Miss me with the ghosting, lack of effort, inconsistency, and poor communication. I continued to just do me because what is for me will not miss me.
Kelvin Murray/ Getty Images
The universe must have heard me talking because I had specifically told my closest girlfriends that I wanted to meet someone who lived in the vicinity, no more than twenty minutes away, and no more long distance. And I did meet him (it’s crazy how I manifest exactly what I want). As we started to get to know each other, I liked his energy and effort. I liked the direction it seemed to be going to the point my girlfriends had to tell me not to run from him. Because every part of me wanted to run from something that seemed normal.
I liked what he was coming with until I became uncomfortable with my own feelings, and I didn’t know how to communicate them to him.
With that said, I knew if I truly wanted to experience the truest of loves, a reciprocal, requited love, and be in a healthy relationship this story had to come to a pause. What I didn’t know was that he was going to show me things I didn’t know I needed to work on. I didn’t know he inadvertently was going to help me continue to heal parts of me that were hidden.
As someone who has learned to self-heal, I am no longer the type that runs from herself. I am here for the growth.
The truth is I am emotionally detached from myself, and I am not actively dating at the moment. I am the one that has to work on herself. My reiki healer called it, too – she told me this year would not be a year for a relationship, but a year of continuous growth. And now I see why. After all the healing work I have done thus far – I am an unemotional mess. How?
At my big age of 39, I struggle to communicate my wants and needs.
I still struggle to communicate and process uncomfortable feelings. I would rather give myself anxiety, act nonchalantly, emotionally react, and choose non-communication when I am bothered with someone than address the issue (I will later explain why). I have been ignoring my feelings for so long it has become a habit, a defense mechanism, and more so a trauma response.
If you are someone like me who grew up in a household that didn’t discuss feelings, your emotional needs were unmet, and you don’t feel safe to share your feelings – emotional detachment is quite common.
Oftentimes, we always talk about men being emotionally unavailable, but what if it’s a woman who is emotionally unavailable or emotionally detached? How does she navigate herself, dating, or being in a relationship? As I navigate my emotions this season, let’s explore what it means to be emotionally detached, the signs of detachment, and how to reconnect with yourself emotionally.
Emotional Unavailability vs. Emotional Detachment
When we look at the terminology emotional unavailability and emotional detachment, one might argue that the two terms are interchangeable and have the same meaning. One could also argue that both terms mean that some people are not in tune with their emotions or lack the emotional capacity to be responsive to someone else’s emotions. Fair enough. However, there is a big difference. The definition of emotional unavailability is described as people who have difficulty with sharing their emotions and being receptive to the emotions of those around them.
According to Verywell Mind, signs of emotional unavailability can look like being distant or cold, lack of closeness, and emotional intimacy in relationships, inability to understand and relate to others’ feelings, defensiveness when asked to change or let others in, tendency to shut down or avoid topics that require emotional openness, or withdrawal from people or situations that provoke emotional reactions.
Whereas emotional detachment is defined as the inability to or willingness to connect with others on an emotional level. Furthermore, Psychology Today states emotional detachment can also mean that people do not engage with their feelings. Exhibit A – me. Emotional detachment has various causes – past neglect, childhood or adult trauma, PTSD, depression, personality disorder, bipolar disorder, substance abuse, or, in some cases, medication (i.e. antidepressants). It is important to note emotional detachment is a complex issue. For someone like me, it’s a coping mechanism.
It is easier for me to ignore uncomfortable feelings to protect myself from stress or getting hurt. Hence, my nonchalant demeanor. It is also true for some people it is a reaction to trauma, abuse, and unprocessed emotions. Exhibit B – me. As it is difficult for me to open up about my feelings at the moment. On the contrary – emotional detachment can be helpful in navigating some situations like listening to people’s opinions and gossip.
Unfortunately, emotional detachment is not a behavior that can be turned on and off at will. Please note that emotional detachment is NOT a mental health diagnosis but can be a symptom of a mental health condition such as an attachment disorder. And if you know anything about attachment theory, it is related to the relationship we develop in our childhood with our primary caregivers.
Signs You're Emotionally Detached
Mavocado/ Getty Images
According to Psychology Today and Verywell Mind, general signs of emotional detachment can look like difficulty showing empathy to others, sharing emotions, committing to a relationship, feeling numb, poor listening skills, lack of self-esteem, preferring to be alone, struggling to feel positive emotions, inability to identify emotions, lack of physical, verbal, or sexual contact and losing touch with people or maintaining connections.
In a romantic relationship, emotional detachment shows up as you or your partner not being available for connection, poor communication, or reduced affection.
For me, my experience with emotional detachment is collective. I am an empath to my core. I don’t have a problem relating to other’s feelings or circumstances. I don’t have commitment issues, nor do I have an issue connecting with others or maintaining those connections. I struggle with sharing emotions, at least the negative ones.
Due to the emotional abuse from my childhood and a toxic relationship, I learned sharing emotions just wasn't the safe thing to do. As a survivor of trauma, I learned to suppress feeling negative emotions in general as a form of protection.
How To Reconnect To Your Emotions When You're Emotionally Unavailable
Serious Kid Cudi GIF by Apple MusicGiphyExploring my emotional side in-depth started late last year simply by noticing my reaction to something that he did. I didn’t know how to properly communicate to him how I was feeling or what he did bothered me in the moment. So, I swallowed my feelings and said absolutely nothing. I intentionally chose to avoid the issue. I chose to rationalize the situation instead of acknowledging that my feelings at the time were valid. I chose to act like everything was all good because it was all good.
“It wasn’t that deep to begin with” is what I told myself. And this is where the problem lies.
The saying is true, “What happens in your childhood shows up in your adult relationships.” I came to realize that because I was not able to express my feelings as a child, I struggled to process them. I either hold back my feelings, take a long time to say how I feel, or don’t say anything at all. This is because I fear people will walk away from me like my mother did if I share what I truly feel. I fear my feelings won’t be validated, or they will be rejected.
With that said, I was completely unaware that I was emotionally detached from myself until recently. So, here we are with this article. It all started by reading Instagram’s @theholisticpsychologist, Dr. Nicole LePera’s newest book How to Be the Love You Seek: Break Cycles, Find Peace, and Heal Your Relationships, which was released on November 28, 2023. As I read through the first chapter, I became triggered.
How Dr. LePera describes her childhood with her parents and experiences with her romantic partners somewhat mirrored my experiences with my own parents and relationships. As Dr. LaPera stated in her book, I have no issue showing up for others or meeting their needs and wants. But when it comes to expressing my own needs and wants – I cannot or I don’t. This is mainly due to my hyper-independence.
At an early age, I learned to show up for myself because the people I trusted to show up for me failed. Given my home environment, I had internalized it is not safe to talk about feelings. I never knew my emotional responses and behavior were abnormal. But because I am willing to continue to do my inner work, I know that I can reconnect to my emotions, and undo four decades of repressed emotions.
If you are someone like me who struggles with emotional connection with yourself and others, here is how you go about it:
Lighthouse Films/ Getty Images
1. Know Your Attachment Style
For me, the first step was to understand my attachment style. I asked my therapist if she could help me identify my attachment style to understand my triggers. She recommended The Attachment Theory Workbook by Annie Chen, LMFT. My therapist administered the associated online quiz – Attachment Quiz. If you haven’t figured out my attachment style yet by reading this article, I have an anxious attachment style.
This means I don’t do well with inconsistent behavior, especially from men (but I’m the type that holds men to standards too). People with an anxious attachment style have a need to feel close to their partner. It may come across as “clingy” or “needy.” However, this same need is often driven by fear of abandonment, mistrust, and low self-esteem. I would say knowing your attachment style is helpful because you can work towards having a secure attachment style (with practice) in your relationships – familial, business, work, platonic, or romantic.
2. Become Self-Aware
Most people who are not in the practice of self-care or self-healing are unaware of their triggers, patterns, and behaviors. We are so caught up in the daily minutiae of life that we forget to pay attention to the most important part of our days — ourselves. As Dr. LePera says, make it a conscious habit to pause throughout your day to check in with yourself. Ask yourself:
- How does my body feel?
- What am I doing right now?
- Am I present?
- Am I distracted and lost with other thoughts?
- What do I think or feel when I recall a specific experience with someone?
- What do I think or worry about?
- What would happen if I shared my authentic thoughts, perspective, feelings right now?”
This is what Dr. LePera refers to as exploring your embodied self or fulfilling your authentic needs in chapter two of her book. Consistent mindfulness and self-awareness are key to self-discovery and in any healing journey. Learning to focus on the present moment also includes paying attention to our emotional response to an event or how we think about emotions in general.
3. Practice Vulnerability
The idea of vulnerability is a tough one for me and so many other women for countless reasons. Whether it be toxic family, friendships, relationships, or trauma – trusting others with your thoughts and feelings is not easy. As much as I am open and transparent, I am not as vulnerable. And I believe there is so much power in the duality to be both. To trust someone, let alone a man with your authentic self is a delicate matter.
But it is emotional vulnerability that allows us humans to build authentic connections, create stronger relationships, and break down emotional walls. Emotional vulnerability is not something to be rushed – it takes time and practice from you and the people you choose to have in your life. Medical News Today suggests that we can learn to be vulnerable by opening up more to our closest friends, building our ability to become more trusting, and developing skills to regulate our emotions.
4. Seek Therapy
I have been in therapy for six years and counting. I would consider therapy one of my safe spaces. I am one of those individuals who recommend therapy to everyone as it has given me the tools and resources I need to navigate my life challenges. By choosing to get help, I was able to put my PTSD and depression in remission for four years now. I have also learned how to manage my anxiety.
I am fully aware that in this season of my life requires me to do the work to unlock new levels of self. And any time where I have consciously chosen growth – the universe or life has not failed me. I was able to heal my body, my heart, and my spirit. Now, it’s time to heal my inner child, this hurt little girl who lives in me.
I will say choosing a therapist is similar to dating; you might go through a few potentials until you find a therapist you connect with. Actually, one of my lifelong friends said to me the other day, “Your relationship with your therapist is one of the most important relationships in your life.” I needed her to say that, and I needed to hear it because it’s true. You are essentially trusting a licensed stranger to help you navigate your life on so many levels.
Be picky and ask the questions. Cut the cord at the first red flag given. Again, let me reiterate that emotional detachment is not a mental health diagnosis. It can be treated with the help of a therapist. Emotional detachment only becomes a problem when it starts to interfere with your daily life. Pay attention to changes in your daily behavior and make decisions to cope accordingly.
I am genuinely excited about reconnecting with my emotions. I want to feel all the feels – good, bad, and indifferent. I want to cry all the tears – especially the sad ones. I want to process and release negative emotions. I want to say how I feel in the moment with no fear.
If you are that girl who struggles with emotional connection or thinks you're emotionally detached, I hope that you become willing to face your inner child and show up for her. Don’t run – she has been waiting for you.
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