How would you like to travel the world rent-free, side by side with your bae, while freely exploring life on your own terms? More than likely, I'm sure you screamed, "Hell yes, pick me!"; but what if that option consisted of living in a van?
Yes sis, a van.
While the #vanlife idea may sound crazy to some, it's a thing. People all over the world are opting into the minimalist, free-living, on the go lifestyle that van lifers have, and have found unique ways to make their van life one of their most memorable experiences ever.
Recently, I caught up with Jessica Malone, a former classmate from my HBCU, and she shared how she and her fiance are getting ready to become members of the #vanlife squad. Jessica and her bae have recently purchased their van and will be getting on the road soon for 12 months to live their best (van) lives.
Here's how Jessica became inspired to become a vanlifer and how she plans on executing it.
Photo Courtesy of Jessica Malone
What Sparked Her Desire For Van Life Living:
"For a very long time while working in corporate in sales and now as a corporate trainer, I had dreams of becoming an entrepreneur. However, I hadn't made the leap because I didn't really know what that would look like. During that time, I developed my brand Nacho Average Fro which focuses on helping people live their best life by simplifying their time, money, and also their attention so that they can gain clarity, find their purpose, and then build a life around their purpose and what they love.
"After having my brand for a while and saving up money from living with my dad, I felt more prepared to plan to make the leap into entrepreneurship. I was financially prepared, I had something that I was interested in and was passionate about working on, and I knew what direction I was headed in. However, even though I had saved up a lot of money, the reality was that my new brand wasn't producing enough revenue for me to put food on the table, or to put a roof over my head. That's when I started wondering what would life as an entrepreneur look like. Where would I live, how would I sustain myself?
"Around the same time, my fiance was also thinking about leaving his corporate job and focusing on some of his passions, so we were having conversations together about what that would look like together as a couple. Simultaneously, I started a podcast that I no longer do with someone I met on Instagram and she started doing this van build-out thing, and it was very interesting to me. From there, I started following #VanLife on Instagram and started watching this TV show on Netflix about minimal living. All of that is really what got my mind going, and is what increased my interest in being a van-lifer.
"One day, this past summer, I called my fiance and I said, 'I think we should get an RV.' To my surprise, he was on board, which completely blew me away."
Photo Courtesy of Jessica Malone
How She Found Her Van:
"Now that my fiance was on board, we started looking for RVs, went to different trade shows, and did a ton of research. At a trade show, we ended up finding an RV that we loved, applied for it, but didn't get it. We found out that we didn't get it because we didn't have enough credit history, and we didn't realize that buying something like an RV is just like buying a house. You have to have a credit history.
"That experience and rejection really bummed me out and it had me thinking that maybe this new life idea was terrible. But then, I kept on seeing more van-life posts on social media, and thought to myself that maybe having a van instead of an RV was the way to go. With a van, I knew that we could pay for it with cash, [it] would eliminate having to pay rent, and [we] would avoid getting denied because of not having enough credit history.
"We ended up buying the van just after Thanksgiving from Facebook Marketplace, which was a totally new experience for me. I had no idea that people bought cars on Facebook. I joined this Facebook group and saw this guy from Utah post that he was selling his van for around $13K. He and his girlfriend had actually recently gone through his own van-life journey and decided they didn't enjoy it so they were selling their van. The van had solar panels and a fan in it, they were giving away a heater, the transmission had just been fixed, and it was just outside of the 10-year mark that we had set aside in regards to how old we wanted our van. The van is a 2008 Dodge Sprinter van, and we ended up getting it cheaper for around $11,300 for it since we were able to meet the guy to pick it up.
"For us, this is an opportunity to build our business, focus on our passions, travel, and spend time with each other, our friends, and family."
Photo Courtesy of Jessica Malone
What The Van Looks Like:
"To give you an idea of our van, it's like the Amazon delivery van, so basically it's like a cargo van. It's two seats in the front, and then it's completely empty in the back. I think our van is like 144 inches long so it's definitely a lot smaller than anything that we've ever lived in.
"As far as planning out the design of our van, we decided we wanted to make it kind of like a tiny home. We decided that we'll have a bedroom space, kitchen space with a counter top, and then work our way up from there and add more as we can. I've seen people add an oven in their van, and that's also something I want to eventually have. We will for sure have some kind of stove, whether that's built into the van or portable. Next, we will have a bed that we can bring down at night, and then up when we're not sleeping so we can use that space to put a table out for work.
"We will not have a shower or a toilet, and I know it sounds crazy, but I don't think it'll be an issue. Based on my research, I found that a lot of vanlifers don't have a toilet or shower, and added going to the gym a part of their daily routine so that they can use the shower there. Ultimately, I've told myself that at the end of this journey, no matter what happens, I'm sure I'll be very fit."
Photo Courtesy of Jessica Malone
How They WIll Sustain Themselves:
"Money is a major thing that we've been thinking about, but we have a plan. For me, I'll be focusing on making money from digital products, and my fiance is working on his own things. Ultimately, we decided that our goal is to live on $2,000 a month. Based on what we've seen from other RVers and vanlifers, that seems reasonable."
Jessica and her fiance will start on the interior design of their van in early 2020, and plan on hitting the road soon after. To keep up with Jessica and her #vanlife journey, follow her on IG @NachoAverageFro.
Featured image courtesy of Jessica Malone
- The Unglamorous Realities of #VanLife and How to Make Life on ... ›
- Van Life Is It For You? - 16 Things We Wish We Knew Before Doing It ›
- How-To Wire Lights & Switches in a DIY Camper Van Electrical ... ›
- The True Cost Of Living In Your Van - How To Make The Most Of It ›
- Van Life How To: Your Complete Guide to Life on the Road ›
- Van Life Culture Is Changing | Bon Appétit ›
- "Normal" Life -> Vanlife: How to Transition (10 steps) — Steemit ›
- Starting Van Life // Things You Must Consider BEFORE Starting VAN ... ›
- Our Transition from Apartment Life to Van Life — Dynamo Ultima ... ›
RELATED
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
___
Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Shutterstock
Using the same material from the interior of the Volvo EX90, Hudson crafted a wool-blend car coat and waistbelt that combine the vehicle’s Scandinavian design with his signature tailoring and intention. The exclusive collection launched on October 20, and each piece is made-to-order by Sergio Hudson Collections.
Courtesy
In October, I traveled to Charleston with a group of journalists to get a firsthand look at Hudson and Volvo’s location. During a fitting, Hudson said his goal is to make “great work that can stand the test of time.”
“People can look back on and say, ‘I remember when Sergio did that collaboration with Volvo,’” he continued. “Thinking about aligning yourself with classic brands that speak to where you want to go. And I think that's what this collaboration kind of means to me and my business.”
Hudson pinpoints his mom as the biggest influence for his designs. This collaboration was no different.
“This particular coat reminded me of the swing coats that my mom used to wear in the early 90s. You know, diva girls in the early 90s had Sandra suits,” he said, referring to Jackée Harry’s character in 227. “My mom wore those and she would have these matching swing coats to go over them. And that's where the initial idea came. This would be around the same time that we had our Volvo. So she would put on her suit, her swing coat, get in that red Volvo, and go to church.”
Courtesy
With this capsule and beyond, Hudson wants to see more staples rotating in and out of closets this fall. He advises fashionistas to build her closet out with essentials to mix and match that aren’t just stylish but also sustainable.
“It's just those special pieces,” he said. “You can wear the same shirt and pants every day and nobody will notice. But if you have a special boot, a special coat, a special bill, a special bag, that kind of speaks to everything that your style stands about, that is something you should focus on.”
These are the same kind of staple pieces that return to our Pinterest boards and TikTok feeds season after season. Fast fashion has never been Hudson’s aim. “I'm trying to create a special pieces that can stand the test of time,” he said in his warm, Southern accent. “I'm only creating those kind of pieces from here on out.”
Courtesy
For Hudson, this collaboration is revolutionary. It’s his first time working with a car company and experimenting outside of his wheelhouse in this way.
“This is a Scandinavian brand, and, you know, it's 70 years old. I'm an African-American boy from South Carolina that has had a brand for 10 years. So I think bridging those two worlds and seeing the similarities was the beauty of this project,” he explained.
Though Hudson and his partner and CEO of Sergio Hudson Collections Inga Beckham have made massive strides in just 10 years, Hudson said the industry is far from where he wants to see it when it comes to Black representation. He pointed to how few Black designers were at this year’s Met Gala despite the theme being Black dandyism.
“The fact that I dressed 18 people speaks to how many of us weren't there,” he said. He implored more of industries, fashion and beyond, to collaborate with Black designers often.
“Allow mentorship. Allow funding. Allow great design to shine through,” he implored. “When it comes to being a designer of African descent, when you can't get the funding that your counterparts have, you can't compete. When you get opportunities like doing a collaboration with Volvo, or you get opportunities to be at the Met Gala, that's putting us on the equal playing field, but really the funding behind it is what we need to take it to that desk level.”
Featured image courtesy