Quantcast
RELATED

I don't know who needs to hear this, but falling for potential will have you out here on your ass.

Almost never counts and according to xoMan Christian Keyes, dating without a purpose is the key to staying single. In a recent interview with Dana Blair for xoMan Live, Christian broke down the biggest dating mistake we all make: falling in love with potential versus reality. He explained:

Christian Keyes Doesn't Date For Potential + Says Kissing Baby Hairs Is A Form Of Intimacy

"I think that's a bad idea because, you just said it, you are falling in love with your version of who that person is. If that's not who they are, then you're gonna change the things about them that you fell for in the first place. When you date with a purpose, you date on purpose. You don't just date to date. If I'm going to give you my time… I gotta see the possibility for it to be something epic because I feel like I deserve something epic."

During his interview with Dana, Christian admitted to having a few relationship faux pas of his own in the past. When asked what his partners would say his biggest flaws were in a relationship, he had this to say:

"They'd say maybe making them a priority. When I was younger, it was more about 'beat it up culture.' Now that I'm older and more grown and more seasoned, I think you learn to take your time and experience and enjoy each other and spend time enjoying each other. The progress report would be more attentive. More gentleman than savage. Occasional savagery."

Although Christian's savage season was more than cringeworthy, he now understands that intimacy extends way beyond sex:

"The touches, the foot rubs, the smells, the collarbone kisses, the ear nibbles, when she's in the kitchen making something and you walk past… The shoulder bites...she on the phone on a conference call just lean in, bite her shoulder a little bit and just keep it moving. I think all the things that create that magic and that real good, feel good feeling, all that butterfly stuff. I think that's all intimacy. I think laying there after making love is intimacy. Kissing on her baby hairs and rubbing on that booty."

Despite his missteps in past relationships, Christian says that now that he's taken the time to define his own needs in a relationship, he'll know exactly when he's found the one—but that doesn't mean she has to be perfect. He continued:

"To be honest, I think we know when we're in a situation that's peaceful and organic, but powerful. You crave that person's presence all the time. They can be next to you and you don't get tired of them. You wanna do random acts of service and super nice shit like, aye babe how was your day?"
"The shit that some people might think is corny, that's the stuff that holds relationships together. I need those moments and I think that's how I know when I'm in the right relationship. Is it gonna be perfect? No. Am I gonna be perfect? No. Is she? No. Could she be perfect for me? Possibly."

Featured image by Joe Seer / Shutterstock.com

 

RELATED

 
ALSO ON XONECOLE
Your February 2025 Horoscopes Are All About Self-Love & Soulful Alignment

Explore your sign’s 2025 horoscope predictions to learn what is in store for you this year in love, career, and more. Check out the love compatibility of each sign to learn more about zodiac pairings and all things compatibility.

February is a coming together, as a culmination of community and abundance is evident. Some significant planets go direct this month after being retrograde since this past year, and we can finally take a deep breath. We walk into the month in Aquarius season, and the focus during this time is on coming together with the people you resonate with on a soul level, opening your heart to love, and gaining perspective in the process. When the Sun is in Aquarius, everything feels more electrified and inspiring, and this is one of the best months of the year to manifest and set your intentions.
KEEP READINGShow less
This Year, Please Don't Let Valentine's Day 'Infect' Your Relationship

Personally, I think that Valentine’s Day and weddings have quite a bit in common. Both can be wonderful days that are centered around love — so long as the real motives are right. Both can also put couples in debt if they are not careful. And boy, if I hear one more woman say that weddings are “MY day” and/or that she isn’t concerned with doing anything for her man on V-Day because “It’s all about ME,” I think I’m going to scream! SMDH.

Indeed, something else that Valentine’s Day and weddings have in common? You can see how genuine or selfish someone truly is.

KEEP READINGShow less
LATEST POSTS