This post was originally published on MommiNation.
I want to take a moment to discuss a very serious topic. A topic that the success of our children, future grandchildren, and even our nation depends on. Let's have an open dialogue about wealth in the black community.
According to a study completed by Prosperity Now, "If the racial wealth divide is left unaddressed and is not exacerbated further over the next eight years, median Black household wealth is on a path to hit zero by 2053." $0?!? That is in less than 35 years. Personally, my son will only be 47, and I, for certain, cannot let this become his reality. We cannot let this become reality!
Reflect on the concepts you learned growing up around wealth. Where did you learn those concepts? Most likely, you didn't learn anything about wealth in school. I'd be willing to bet that whatever you learned, good, bad, or indifferent, you learned from the examples within your family dynamic. Have you noticed the difference between the wealth of blacks vs. wealth of whites? I'm sure you have. But how can we close this gap and how can we blur the lines to make it impossible to notice this difference?
The answer is within our children.
It is our responsibility to teach our children about generational wealth. It is one thing to teach our children how to have a healthy relationship with money, but if we are not passing wealth on to them, we cannot be sure they will acquire it. It is time we break the generational curse of scarcity and start securing our legacies. We can disrupt the wealth gap, but we must be intentional and forward thinking. Generational wealth is not just about money passed down, it is also opportunities, support, and investments to generate more money.
Let's talk steps:
Self-Care
GiphySelf-care is not only about taking bubble baths, meditating, and working out. Self-care is about preserving your health, which includes your financial health. If you have mountains of debt, poor credit, no savings/investments, or unhealthy spending habits, that is what you will pass to your children. Before your child can become wealthy, your financial independence is required. This is the first step to setting your children up for generational wealth.
Multiple Streams of Income
GiphyWe are talking about building wealth, therefore having only one source of income will not cut it. Take all of your eggs out of that one basket and start spreading the wealth. It is almost impossible to depend on a 9-5 to build wealth when lay-offs, pay cuts, and unforeseen circumstances can storm through your life at any moment. Multiple streams of income not only provides security, but it also builds wealth. Many financial books (as well as the internet… and you know the internet is always right) proclaim that the average millionaire has seven sources of income. How many streams of income do you have?
No Fund Me
GiphyLife insurance is not to protect you, it is to protect your family. Life insurance is important for several reasons. The most important reason is to ensure that you do not pass on debt to your loved ones. Leaving funeral expenses, debt, and financial burdens to our loved ones must stop! If you take nothing else from this article, take this. Go get a life insurance policy ASAP! I cannot see another GoFundMe as a substitute for life insurance. In addition to covering your debts, life insurance can leave a substantial inheritance for your family leading up to the time that you have successfully built wealth yourself.
Credit
On the personal finance scene, there is a big debate around the use of credit. Personally, I feel like credit is a necessary evil. When your child is 16 (as young as 13 with some companies), add them to your oldest credit card with excellent payment history, utilizing 10% or less of the limit, and ensure the company is reporting to the credit bureau. Warning: This should ONLY be done if you are an extremely responsible credit card user. If you are not, DO NOT take this action and see number 1 on this list immediately. Please do not ruin your child's credit before they are old enough to ruin their own. Building your child's credit at an early age allows them to immediately obtain business loans, an auto loan with a low-interest rate, buy a home, get an apartment, etc. If you are successful at building wealth, which allows them to cash flow all expenses, they will not need credit. But, it will not hurt to have a 700+ credit score at the age of 18.
Investments
I could write an entire blog post about investments and how important they are (and actually, I probably will in the future). But for now, I'll keep it brief. THIS is the part where you build wealth. In order to pass down wealth, you want to pass down assets that will continue to generate more assets.
Retirement Account
- First and foremost, you should have a retirement investment account. This will prevent you from working the rest of your life while continuing to generate passive income. Once you leave this earth, your contributions will be transferred to your beneficiaries (your family).
Real Estate
- Investing in property is arguably the most efficient way to build and pass on wealth. Real estate is a tangible purchase you can make that will appreciate and become more valuable over time.
529 Plan
- Invest in your child's education. Now this is one I am passionate about because I have a massive amount of student loan debt that has prevented me from living my best life and also put me behind the curve of building a legacy for my child. Recent studies show that the US student loan debt is $1.5 TRILLION and black women hold $890 BILLION of this total. Whether college is necessary is debatable, but I can tell you as a person that hires/fires in corporate America and a person whose income has tripled because of a Masters degree, having a degree opens more doors than not. Take advantage of a college savings plan at a young age and prevent your child from falling in the student loan trap that will make it difficult for them to build and pass on generational wealth.
Stocks, Bonds, and the Likes
- Stash money into low-cost investment funds for your children at a young age. Let compound interest do its thing, and your child will be set when they enter adulthood.
The transmission of wealth is often accomplished much earlier in life and in less direct ways than inheritances during late adulthood. Securing your family's legacy will take intentional small steps that will make a substantial impact. Start now! Finish strong! And let's secure the bag our children will benefit from for generations to come.
Were you set up financially for generational wealth? Have you utilized any of these tips to set your children up for wealth? Or were any of these tips utilized to prepare you to receive wealth?
Written by Mykal Steen
Originally published on MommiNation
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
___
Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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Using the same material from the interior of the Volvo EX90, Hudson crafted a wool-blend car coat and waistbelt that combine the vehicle’s Scandinavian design with his signature tailoring and intention. The exclusive collection launched on October 20, and each piece is made-to-order by Sergio Hudson Collections.
Courtesy
In October, I traveled to Charleston with a group of journalists to get a firsthand look at Hudson and Volvo’s location. During a fitting, Hudson said his goal is to make “great work that can stand the test of time.”
“People can look back on and say, ‘I remember when Sergio did that collaboration with Volvo,’” he continued. “Thinking about aligning yourself with classic brands that speak to where you want to go. And I think that's what this collaboration kind of means to me and my business.”
Hudson pinpoints his mom as the biggest influence for his designs. This collaboration was no different.
“This particular coat reminded me of the swing coats that my mom used to wear in the early 90s. You know, diva girls in the early 90s had Sandra suits,” he said, referring to Jackée Harry’s character in 227. “My mom wore those and she would have these matching swing coats to go over them. And that's where the initial idea came. This would be around the same time that we had our Volvo. So she would put on her suit, her swing coat, get in that red Volvo, and go to church.”
Courtesy
With this capsule and beyond, Hudson wants to see more staples rotating in and out of closets this fall. He advises fashionistas to build her closet out with essentials to mix and match that aren’t just stylish but also sustainable.
“It's just those special pieces,” he said. “You can wear the same shirt and pants every day and nobody will notice. But if you have a special boot, a special coat, a special bill, a special bag, that kind of speaks to everything that your style stands about, that is something you should focus on.”
These are the same kind of staple pieces that return to our Pinterest boards and TikTok feeds season after season. Fast fashion has never been Hudson’s aim. “I'm trying to create a special pieces that can stand the test of time,” he said in his warm, Southern accent. “I'm only creating those kind of pieces from here on out.”
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For Hudson, this collaboration is revolutionary. It’s his first time working with a car company and experimenting outside of his wheelhouse in this way.
“This is a Scandinavian brand, and, you know, it's 70 years old. I'm an African-American boy from South Carolina that has had a brand for 10 years. So I think bridging those two worlds and seeing the similarities was the beauty of this project,” he explained.
Though Hudson and his partner and CEO of Sergio Hudson Collections Inga Beckham have made massive strides in just 10 years, Hudson said the industry is far from where he wants to see it when it comes to Black representation. He pointed to how few Black designers were at this year’s Met Gala despite the theme being Black dandyism.
“The fact that I dressed 18 people speaks to how many of us weren't there,” he said. He implored more of industries, fashion and beyond, to collaborate with Black designers often.
“Allow mentorship. Allow funding. Allow great design to shine through,” he implored. “When it comes to being a designer of African descent, when you can't get the funding that your counterparts have, you can't compete. When you get opportunities like doing a collaboration with Volvo, or you get opportunities to be at the Met Gala, that's putting us on the equal playing field, but really the funding behind it is what we need to take it to that desk level.”
Featured image courtesy