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Allergic To Condoms? Try This.
Semi-recently, I was having an online conversation with a group of people about birth control — well, more specifically, condoms. As all of the men were talking about one of the perks of being in an exclusive relationship is not having to wear one at all, it was interesting to hear how many women say that they didn't really like rubbers either. While I totally get why men would prefer to go "cover free" (if you know what I mean) and while I also wasn't exactly the poster child for prophylactics in my past sex life, condoms have come a really long way when it comes to its thinness which enhances the sensation of sexual stimulation; because of this, it would seem that, for women, this would make using one so much more, well, pleasurable.
"Yeah, but when sex goes for longer than 20 minutes or so, condoms really start to get on my nerves" is what a lot of the women shared. As I listened more, what I realized is a lot of ladies find rubbers to be annoying because they seem to be low-key allergic to them and so, of course, it makes sense why rubbers would be triggers. Since this is a topic about safe sex that isn't discussed a ton, I wanted to take a moment to share with you how you can know if you are somehow allergic to condoms — and what you should do if that is indeed the case.
How Do You Know If You’re Actually Allergic to Rubbers?
There used to be a time when, when it came to which kind of condom options you had, it was pretty much a coin toss between lambskin (it's made from the thin lining of a lamb's intestines) and latex. While some people prefer lambskin as an alternative to latex, it is effective at preventing unplanned pregnancies and it's also FDA-approved because it's porous (which means it's not as effective as latex when it comes to shielding you from STDs), not super stretchy, is harder to find and more expensive than latex ones, that's why latex usually tends to win out. The challenge is, if you happen to be allergic to rubber, latex ones can cause vaginal irritation, and/or if you go with an oil-based lubricant in order to "reduce the effect" of the rubber-to-friction-during-intercourse issue, the oil can either degrade the potency of the condom or cause it to slip off altogether.
So, let's pause at the "allergic to rubber" point. What are some of the signs that this may indeed be what's transpiring? If during or after sex you experience itching, swelling, redness, or even a slight rash, this means that you could be experiencing a mild allergic reaction to a latex condom. Beyond that, anything like coughing, sneezing, difficulty breathing, nausea, rapid heartbeat, stomach discomfort, or along these lines means that something more serious is going on and you should probably make an appointment with your doctor to see what kind of treatment they would recommend.
Oh, and if you're wondering if condoms can give you a yeast infection, the answer is "yes" although that's not really because you're allergic to them; that's more about condoms throwing off of your pH (check out "Sis, This Is How To Keep Your Vagina's pH Balanced"). Whenever that happens, a vaginal infection can pop up as a direct result.
Are You Sure That It’s the Condom? Perhaps It’s the Lubricant (or Something Else).
OK, but what if you've been using condoms for years and it's only been as of late that you've not been feeling 100 percent after having sex with one? If that's the case, something that you might want to ponder is if you've changed brands and, if so, if it could be the spermicide or lubricant that the brand uses that is giving you so many problems.
As far as spermicide goes, it's what helps to kill sperm, right? Well, the active ingredient in it is nonoxynol-9 and it's got a rep for sometimes irritating vaginas. As a matter of fact, some studies indicate that it can actually cause women to be more at risk (I know, right?) for STDs like gonorrhea and chlamydia because it has a tendency to break down the effectiveness of the vaginal mucosa that helps to protect the skin that is inside of your vagina.
And lubricants? It's actually not uncommon to be allergic to the ingredients that are in them as well. If the more that you think about all of this, you do believe that it's what's in/on the condom and not the condom itself that is giving you such a headache, you might want to either go with a condom that doesn't contain any spermicide or lubrication at all. And what if you don't want a "dry condom"? I totally understand. If this is the case, you can always purchase a separate lubricant brand that you are comfortable with (silicone ones are pretty good; water-based ones are great for sex toys) or you can make some yourself. It's a lot easier than you probably think. For tips on how to go the DIY route, check out "If You've Always Wanted A 'Lubricant Cheat Sheet,' Here Ya Go".
Are There Any Other Options/Alternatives?
There's no way around the fact that when condoms are used correctly and consistently, they are 98 percent effective. And when you let it sink in that STDs continue to reach all-time highs, even if you do end up coming to the conclusion that you are indeed allergic to latex condoms, unless you are in an exclusive relationship and you both get regularly tested, that still isn't a good enough reason to not use rubbers altogether. So, what should you do? Go with other alternatives that are on the market. We've already touched on the pros and cons of lambskin rubbers. That said, another alternative is polyurethane condoms. The good thing about them is they are typically thinner than latex, they don't have any type of odor to them, and they absorb body heat better. So, what's the downside?
Well, some people say they don't stretch as well as latex ones do, they're not the tightest fit and, they seem to break more than latex does. Then there are polyisoprene condoms. These are the kind of condoms that are made out of synthetic rubber which means they don't have the proteins in them that standard latex rubbers do; this is good to know since the proteins are usually what results in allergic reactions. Some other cool things about polyisoprene rubbers are they're stretchy like latex and are far less likely to tear. The con is they tend to be thicker which means your partner may not get the kind of sensation he's after; in fact, he might find them to be a tad bit uncomfortable overall. And when it comes to purchasing these alternatives, where do you go? Well, if you're looking to make discreet yet affordable buys,Undercover Condoms is a site that won't disappoint.
Welp. There you have it. An article on condoms that hopefully connected a few dots so that you'll know how to switch up your safe sex game so that you can remain protected and also irritation-free. Enjoy, sis.
To learn more about all things vaginal health and wellness, check out the xoNecole Women's Health section here.
Featured image by Getty Images
Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
Feature image courtesy
‘ACross Generations With Tiffany Cross’ Have A Candid Conversation About Diversity In Media
Being the only Black person at your job can often make you feel isolated. There’s no one to relate to or who even understands your background. This is a conversation that many Black people have among each other and a topic that was covered in the latest episode of ACross Generations with Tiffany Cross.
Host Tiffany sat down with media professionals Michele McGhee and Sidney Madden to discuss everything from diversity in media to their own journeys in the industry. Tiffany, who has worked at many media platforms such as BET, revealed that during her time at CNN, she felt isolated and dismissed by her coworkers.
“Not only isolated in what you looked like but isolated in your lived experience and have people summarily dismiss your humanity on a daily basis,” she said.
Michele agreed; however, she took a different approach toward the dismissiveness she experienced while working at CNN.
“I would sit there, and I’d be like, oh my God, I’m the only one, and really it made me connect to my faith because I said God wants me to be the only one because He wants me to have this voice. He wants me to have this moment, and He wants me to go on this journey because if you’re with someone else, I can’t stretch and grow you the way I need you to be.”
She continued, “So now, as a 58-year-old woman, I never ask God, why am I alone.”
Michele is now the co-founder and CEO of Expectant Media, a company that elevates Black-owned media and creators.
Sidney is a writer and host of NPR’s podcast Louder Than A Riot. When she began working at NPR, she was one of three Black people and the only Black woman in the music department.
She recalled a moment when she pitched a story about Cardi B’s buying power before she became mainstream and how well it did on the site. The story reminded her of the value she brings to the table.
She said, “It was a point of validation for me because I’m like, ‘Oh, actually, I can learn all this stuff you’re talking about, but there’s some things you’re never gonna know. And I’m truly gonna be the expert in that I can assert in this place that you can never take away from me, and that’s the voice.”
Watch the full episode of ACross Generations with Tiffany Cross below.
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Feature image by ACross Generations with Tiffany Cross/ YouTube