Semi-recently, I was having an online conversation with a group of people about birth control — well, more specifically, condoms. As all of the men were talking about one of the perks of being in an exclusive relationship is not having to wear one at all, it was interesting to hear how many women say that they didn't really like rubbers either. While I totally get why men would prefer to go "cover free" (if you know what I mean) and while I also wasn't exactly the poster child for prophylactics in my past sex life, condoms have come a really long way when it comes to its thinness which enhances the sensation of sexual stimulation; because of this, it would seem that, for women, this would make using one so much more, well, pleasurable.
"Yeah, but when sex goes for longer than 20 minutes or so, condoms really start to get on my nerves" is what a lot of the women shared. As I listened more, what I realized is a lot of ladies find rubbers to be annoying because they seem to be low-key allergic to them and so, of course, it makes sense why rubbers would be triggers. Since this is a topic about safe sex that isn't discussed a ton, I wanted to take a moment to share with you how you can know if you are somehow allergic to condoms — and what you should do if that is indeed the case.
How Do You Know If You’re Actually Allergic to Rubbers?
There used to be a time when, when it came to which kind of condom options you had, it was pretty much a coin toss between lambskin (it's made from the thin lining of a lamb's intestines) and latex. While some people prefer lambskin as an alternative to latex, it is effective at preventing unplanned pregnancies and it's also FDA-approved because it's porous (which means it's not as effective as latex when it comes to shielding you from STDs), not super stretchy, is harder to find and more expensive than latex ones, that's why latex usually tends to win out. The challenge is, if you happen to be allergic to rubber, latex ones can cause vaginal irritation, and/or if you go with an oil-based lubricant in order to "reduce the effect" of the rubber-to-friction-during-intercourse issue, the oil can either degrade the potency of the condom or cause it to slip off altogether.
So, let's pause at the "allergic to rubber" point. What are some of the signs that this may indeed be what's transpiring? If during or after sex you experience itching, swelling, redness, or even a slight rash, this means that you could be experiencing a mild allergic reaction to a latex condom. Beyond that, anything like coughing, sneezing, difficulty breathing, nausea, rapid heartbeat, stomach discomfort, or along these lines means that something more serious is going on and you should probably make an appointment with your doctor to see what kind of treatment they would recommend.
Oh, and if you're wondering if condoms can give you a yeast infection, the answer is "yes" although that's not really because you're allergic to them; that's more about condoms throwing off of your pH (check out "Sis, This Is How To Keep Your Vagina's pH Balanced"). Whenever that happens, a vaginal infection can pop up as a direct result.
Are You Sure That It’s the Condom? Perhaps It’s the Lubricant (or Something Else).
OK, but what if you've been using condoms for years and it's only been as of late that you've not been feeling 100 percent after having sex with one? If that's the case, something that you might want to ponder is if you've changed brands and, if so, if it could be the spermicide or lubricant that the brand uses that is giving you so many problems.
As far as spermicide goes, it's what helps to kill sperm, right? Well, the active ingredient in it is nonoxynol-9 and it's got a rep for sometimes irritating vaginas. As a matter of fact, some studies indicate that it can actually cause women to be more at risk (I know, right?) for STDs like gonorrhea and chlamydia because it has a tendency to break down the effectiveness of the vaginal mucosa that helps to protect the skin that is inside of your vagina.
And lubricants? It's actually not uncommon to be allergic to the ingredients that are in them as well. If the more that you think about all of this, you do believe that it's what's in/on the condom and not the condom itself that is giving you such a headache, you might want to either go with a condom that doesn't contain any spermicide or lubrication at all. And what if you don't want a "dry condom"? I totally understand. If this is the case, you can always purchase a separate lubricant brand that you are comfortable with (silicone ones are pretty good; water-based ones are great for sex toys) or you can make some yourself. It's a lot easier than you probably think. For tips on how to go the DIY route, check out "If You've Always Wanted A 'Lubricant Cheat Sheet,' Here Ya Go".
Are There Any Other Options/Alternatives?
There's no way around the fact that when condoms are used correctly and consistently, they are 98 percent effective. And when you let it sink in that STDs continue to reach all-time highs, even if you do end up coming to the conclusion that you are indeed allergic to latex condoms, unless you are in an exclusive relationship and you both get regularly tested, that still isn't a good enough reason to not use rubbers altogether. So, what should you do? Go with other alternatives that are on the market. We've already touched on the pros and cons of lambskin rubbers. That said, another alternative is polyurethane condoms. The good thing about them is they are typically thinner than latex, they don't have any type of odor to them, and they absorb body heat better. So, what's the downside?
Well, some people say they don't stretch as well as latex ones do, they're not the tightest fit and, they seem to break more than latex does. Then there are polyisoprene condoms. These are the kind of condoms that are made out of synthetic rubber which means they don't have the proteins in them that standard latex rubbers do; this is good to know since the proteins are usually what results in allergic reactions. Some other cool things about polyisoprene rubbers are they're stretchy like latex and are far less likely to tear. The con is they tend to be thicker which means your partner may not get the kind of sensation he's after; in fact, he might find them to be a tad bit uncomfortable overall. And when it comes to purchasing these alternatives, where do you go? Well, if you're looking to make discreet yet affordable buys,Undercover Condoms is a site that won't disappoint.
Welp. There you have it. An article on condoms that hopefully connected a few dots so that you'll know how to switch up your safe sex game so that you can remain protected and also irritation-free. Enjoy, sis.
To learn more about all things vaginal health and wellness, check out the xoNecole Women's Health section here.
Featured image by Getty Images
It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
There’s just something about HBCU Homecoming that just hits different. Whether it’s your first time stepping onto the yard since graduation or you’re a regular at every Homecoming tailgate, HBCU pride is undeniable. It’s a vibrant celebration that unites the legacy of excellence and tradition with the energy and resilience of Black culture.
The experience goes beyond a typical college reunion; HBCU Homecoming is a family reunion, a fashion show, a cultural festival, and a week-long turn-up that embodies what it means to be unapologetically Black and educated. For HBCU alumni, the journey back to the yard each year is rooted in a love and pride that’s hard to put into words but impossible to deny.
From statement pieces to tech must-haves, every item represents the intersection of Black pride and HBCU love, ensuring that you show up to the yard in style and with intention. So whether you’re repping your alma mater for the first time since graduation or looking for fresh pieces to express your HBCU pride, these essentials will have you standing out, because, at HBCU Homecoming, it’s not just about showing up—it’s about showing out.
Thread Goals
diarrablu Jant Pants in Alia Noir
High-waisted, wide-legged, and ready to shut down the yard, the Jant Pants by diarrablu bring a whole new meaning to campus chic. Handcrafted in Dakar, Senegal, these free-flowing jacquard pants are perfect for stepping onto the yard with style and ease—making them a must-have for any HBCU alum’s closet.
Silver & Riley Convertible Executive Leather Bag Classic Size in Olive
This all-in-one luxury bag isn’t a bestseller for nothing. The Silver & Riley essential is made of Italian calfskin leather and thoughtfully designed, as it can be worn in four different ways: a shoulder bag, crossbody, a top handle, and a backpack. Chic and elegant, the Convertible Executive Leather bag is “the bag that every woman needs in her collection.”
Renowned Women's Intuition Cotton Graphic T-Shirt
Renowned
Renowned’s Women’s Intuition Cotton Graphic T-shirt features a bold graphic print inspired by the power and essence of women’s intuition. With its striking design, this all-cotton tee is a vibrant thing, making it a statement piece that celebrates feminine energy.
Mifland Million M Mesh Crop Shirt
Talk about bold, the Million M Mesh Crop Shirt combines edgy style with comfort, featuring Mifland’s signature print on a semi-see-through mesh fabric. Show up and show out in sophisticated flair.
HBCU Love FUBU
Melanin Is Life Melanated & Educated - I Love My HBCU Hoodie
Show off your HBCU love with this piece that represents everything you gained from your alma mater: a top-tier education, a community that lifts you up, and a deep sense of esteem for yourself and your culture. Wear it loud and proud, because being melanated and educated isn’t just a flex—it’s a legacy.
HBCU Culture Spelmanite Sweatshirt in Navy
Spelmanites, rep your Spelman pride with this unisex crewneck sweatshirt, designed for ultimate comfort and a relaxed fit. Made from a cozy cotton/polyester blend, this classic sweatshirt is as durable as it is stylish—making it an ideal piece for any Spelmanite showing love for their alma mater.
HBCU Culture Howard Is The Culture T-Shirt
Rock the ultimate flex by showcasing your Howard U love with HBCU Culture’s Howard Is The Culture t-shirt. This unisex tee offers a comfortable, relaxed fit that’s perfect for celebrating your HBCU spirit without sacrificing style or comfort.
DungeonForward FAMU - Strike Bucket - Reversible
DungeonForward’s Strike Bucket Hat brings versatility and style to the FAMU Crown collection with its reversible design, giving you two looks in one. Featuring a sleek black snakeskin-embossed brim lining and a bold outline Rattler emblem, this hat is all about repping your Rattler pride in style.
DungeonForward Savannah State University - HBCU Hat - TheYard
The Savannah State University HBCU Hat by DungeonForward is more than just a hat—it’s a symbol of Tiger pride and a nod to the culture. Perfect for gamedays, tailgates, or just showing off your HBCU love, this hat lets you carry a piece of the yard wherever you go.
Tech the Halls
Anker iPhone 16 Portable Charger, Nano Power Bank
Stay charged up with the Anker Nano Power Bank, which features dual USB-C ports, a foldable connector, and a compact design, making it perfect for those HBCU tailgates and late-night parties you pull up to.
Drip Check
Wisdom Frame 14 Square Sunglasses
Elevate your look with these angular square-frame sunglasses by Wisdom, bringing an ultramodern edge to any outfit. The sleek design makes them perfect for blocking out the haters while you stunt on the yard.
Coco and Breezy Eyewear Fortune in Gray Turquoise
The Fortune Glasses in Grey Turquoise is a bold statement piece to any Homecoming weekend ‘fit that “embody our fearless and outspoken DNA.” With their color and edgy design, these frames by Coco and Breezy are perfect for anyone looking to stand out and express their unapologetic confidence.
Howard U Lapel Pin
Rep your Bison pride wherever you go with this Howard U Lapel Pin from Pretty AmbVision. Whether adding it to your jacket, shirt, or bag, this pin is the perfect way to showcase your love for your alma mater while rocking your HBCU love with honor and distinction.
Mifland Standard Rucksack Mini
The Standard Rucksack is designed to evolve like that HBCU pride—getting richer, bolder, and better with time. Durable, stylish, and built to last, this Rucksack by Mifland is a timeless piece equipped with versatile carrying options and fully adjustable back straps for ultimate comfort.
Stay Fresh, Stay Blessed
Slip Pure Silk Sleep Mask in Pink
Keeping it cute starts with beauty sleep. This luxurious silk mask is an essential for a reason. If protecting your skin and waking up refreshed is your priority, look no further than this Homecoming essential.
Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier Lemon Lime - Hydration Powder Packets
Stay hydrated and energized throughout Homecoming weekend with this Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier in Lemon Lime. Just add a packet to your water bottle, and bless your body with 2-3 times more hydration than water with every packet. Because staying hydrated is the key to popping up and showing out all weekend long!
Loop Experience Plus Earplugs High Fidelity Hearing Protection
Designed for your hearing protection, these sleek earplugs reduce noise without compromising sound quality—perfect for enjoying the band’s halftime show, late-night parties, and DJ sets. Whether you’re front row at the step show or hitting the yard, your ears deserve to be protected in style!
Black Girl Magic Glass Cup
Sip in style and celebrate your melanin with the Black Girl Magic Glass Cup. Perfect for morning coffee, your favorite iced drink, or showing off your HBCU pride on the yard—this cup is all about keeping it cute while radiating your endless supply of Black Girl Magic.
Glow Up & Show Out
Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30
What Homecoming weekend can be complete without an assist from this beauty find? Formulated to blend seamlessly into melanin-rich skin (no white-cast), protect your glow while you turn up with the Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30.
Sienna Naturals Issa Rae's Wash Day Ritual Set
Issa Rae’s Wash Day Ritual Set from Sienna Naturals includes the H.A.PI. Shampoo, the Plant Power Repair Mask, Dew Magic, and Lock and Seal to get your crown right. Whether you’re repping your coils or rocking a new color on the yard, these products restore and nourish your strands, keeping your hair healthy, strong, and Homecoming-ready!
54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter
Stay glowing from the tailgate to the after-party with the 54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter. Infused with African-sourced ingredients, this rich, multi-purpose butter is the answer to keeping your skin soft and radiant through all the festivities all Homecoming long.
Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil
Keep your lips looking luscious and nourished with the Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil. Perfect for adding an extra pop to your pout before hitting the yard or freshening up between events, this lip oil is a beauty essential for staying camera-ready all weekend.
Featured image by Visual Vic/Getty Images
Rechelle Dennis Talks Working With Family, Burnout & Girls United Disruptor Summit
When a Black woman dreams, she dreams big, and Rechelle Dennis is no exception. As the co-creator of Essence Girls United, a Gen-Z platform, it’s clear she’s focused not just on sustaining the platform’s success but also on taking it to new heights through partnerships, innovative programs, or fresh ways to engage and uplift the community.
Her vision is all about creating more impactful opportunities for young Black women to thrive, which is also a vision she shares with her sister and co-worker, Sophia.
Sister, Sister
We love a good sister duo, and Rechelle’s working relationship with Sophia is the perfect example of how to keep family first while building something amazing. I couldn’t help but ask her what it’s like to work so closely with her sister—because, let’s face it, business and family can get tricky. Rechelle gives xoNecole the tea on how they make it work, keep things fun, and maintain that special bond.
“Sophia and I are very different but very similar at the same time. We're both very strong-headed. Sophia is definitely the more creative and outgoing one, while I am very much of a workaholic," Rechelle tells us. "I'm very reserved when you meet me, but once you get to know me and the layers come off, you're gonna think I'm insane in a good way."
She continues, "It's like any relationship. You understand what their strengths and weaknesses are, and then you just lean into that. You just meet people where they're at and find a way to work with each other and to where everybody is or feels like they're bringing the best to whatever it is you're building or doing. We’re also able to challenge each other and come knowing that we're both trying to get to the best possible outcome."
Staying Grounded and Self-Care Vibes
We know that life can get real busy, and as a self-proclaimed workaholic, Rechelle juggles a lot. Balancing work, family, and personal time is a challenge many of us face, as burnout can happen. Rechelle shares some of her go-to practices for avoiding burnout and making sure she stays centered in her hectic schedule.
“How do I avoid burnout? I've been asking myself a lot lately. Burnout is something that happens to everybody, and I feel like I've never really addressed it. I think that's also something that I'm still learning myself because that's how I'm wired, is to always be on," she explains.
"What I've realized and what I've done more is having more of that internal dialogue with myself and putting the phone down. TikTok is gonna wait. Instagram is gonna wait. You just gotta soak in your bath and maybe text your friend. It sounds kind of toxic, but not talking to anybody."
She continues, "I'm very clear when I know my social battery is exhausted. I know when it's time for me to leave a party or an event. I also know when to make space when I have to go to an event. I'm going to just sit in my room quietly and then prepare for this. I think it's also just about knowing yourself and knowing when to Irish exit. It's really important to know yourself or just spend time getting to know yourself.”
Gearing Up for What’s Next
With Saturday’s Girls United Disruptor Summit around the corner, the excitement is real. “I think the goal is, as always, continuing to strengthen and pour into our community and provide as much value as possible," she says.
The summit also provides mentorship opportunities for young Black women and professionals in various industries. "It's giving people those opportunities, the ability to live their wildest dreams, and step into that next era," she says.
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Feature image by Paras Griffin/Getty Images