

All-Natural Ways To Get Adult Body Acne Under Control
If there are two things that I thought would slow down once I hit 45, it was menstrual cycles and body acne. But nope—my periods still run like clockwork and, it's fairly common for me to get a couple of zits on my back and shoulders once a month. Well, it's common if I'm not proactive in taking measures to make sure that I don't experience any breakouts.
I must admit that eating less dairy, getting more rest and washing with sulfur soap have done wonders to keep pimples at bay. But there are a few other all-natural intricate things that I've added to my skincare regimen that has definitely made it more difficult for acne—and the scars that they typically leave behind—to pop up on any part of my body.
If you've got body acne bouts that have been getting on your very last nerve, here's what you should definitely try out.
1. Make Your Own Soap
Black soap. Sulfur soap. Off top, those are two soaps that I can definitely vouch for when it comes to gently-yet-effectively treating body acne. But something else that I'm a fan of is making my own soap, because I can customize what works for me and what doesn't. An herbal soap recipe that will definitely give your breakouts a run for their money is a soap that contains neem, palm, tea tree and peppermint essential oils.
You can get the recipe here. Just make sure to moisturize your skin after using it with something like shea butter, grapeseed oil, sweet almond oil or pure Aloe Vera gel to reduce any risk of inflammation. It's a great recipe but it is also a pretty potent one.
2. Apply an Apple Cider Vinegar Spritz
It really is another article for another time, all of the things that apple cider vinegar can do; one of them is kill the bacteria that causes acne. It's able to do that because of all of the acids that are in it—acetic, citric, lactic and succinic acid. The key is to use the kind of apple cider vinegar that has the mother in it (like Braggs) and dilute it with water (because it's very strong!). Do this by mixing one-part vinegar with three-parts water. I think it's best to put it in a spritz bottle; that way, you can spray it directly onto your skin.
Just make sure to close your eyes when you do (vinegar can burn) and that you do it 30 minutes for going out. That will give the stench of the vinegar time to go away.
3. Heal Scars with Frankincense Essential Oil
I think the thing that I hate the most about body acne is, no matter how well I treat it, some sort of mark is going to be left behind. Ugh. Just ugh. I will say that my skin heals pretty quickly (scars fade within three weeks or so), but that doesn't mean that a well-placed acne scar doesn't sometimes dictate what I will or will not wear.
If that is your dilemma, frankincense oil has got your back (pun intended). Personally, I like the scent of the combination of frankincense and myrrh, so I definitely have no problem applying this to my skin in order to treat acne scars. Matter of fact, I recommend applying the combo. Myrrh will help to detox your skin, and frankincense is able to soften up scar tissue so that it is less obvious. Something else that is cool about frankincense oil is it contains anti-inflammatory properties, is able to increase the growth of new skin cells and it contains a property called farnesol that will improve your skin's elasticity too.
4. Nix Foods That Have a High Glycemic Index (GI) and a High Glycemic Load (GL)
There is a whole science behind this part of the conversation, but probably the best way to put it is there are certain kinds of foods that kick our sebum production (a natural oil in our system and can sometimes clog our pores and cause acne) into overdrive. More sebum, more clogged pores. More clogged pores, more acne.
What kind of foods make the list? Sweet cereals, instant cereals, all-things-white (white pasta, white rice, white bread, white potatoes, etc.) and all-things-dairy too. Also, foods that you are sensitive to that can lead to inflammation should be avoided, along with whey protein and dried fruit because they trigger your insulin levels which can also cause acne.
5. Take Some Milk Thistle
Ever since I was in my 20s, I've had relatives who wanted me to add the supplement milk thistle to my diet. I didn't listen, but I should have because it really has done wonders for the quality of my health. Milk thistle is a flowering plant that is located in Mediterranean countries. For years, people have used it to treat jaundice, hepatitis, reduce cholesterol and insulin resistance, boost immunity and even stop the spread of certain types of cancer.
I use it because it also has a great reputation for detoxifying the liver and promoting skin health. It makes sense how the two work hand in hand because, the less toxins that are in your body, the less acne that tends to pop up. (Milk thistle also contains antioxidant and anti-aging properties as well.)
6. Drink Some Kefir
Kefir is fermented milk; it's kind of like buttermilk. So yeah, it's not necessarily the best-tasting thing in the world. And before you even say that you'll bypass its taste by eating yogurt instead, here's the thing about that—yogurt is fermented bacteria while kefir is fermented bacteria and yeast. Because it contains both, drinking kefir on a consistent basis will keep your blood sugar under control, keep your gut health on track, make you less lactose intolerant, help to heal vaginal and yeast infections and also reduce your breakouts.
On the breakout tip, it does that by healing your stomach and your skin with the probiotic lactoferrin. It works so well that one study reveals that drinking a glass of kefir, on a daily basis, can reduce acne lesions by as much as 39 percent (over a four-month period).
7. Dry Brush (or Use Exfoliating Gloves)
Clogged pores are what lead to breakouts, and one of the main causes of pore blockage are dead skin cells. Since our skin sheds a whopping 30,000 cells a day, due to the sebum and dirt that also sticks to our skin, it's important to exfoliate it too. You can do this by dry brushing (which is also an effective way to reduce the appearance of cellulite) or by putting on those cute exfoliating gloves that you should even be able to find at your local grocery store. Both of these will loosen up the dead skin on your body so that the cells will wash off instead of clogging up your pores.
8. Try Some Cinnamon
There really isn't too much that cinnamon isn't good for. It fights heart disease, reduces inflammation, decreases menstrual discomfort, fights infections and viruses, helps to prevent candida and yep, it's also really good for your skin. Due to the powerful antibiotic and antimicrobial properties found in cinnamon powder and oil (especially if you mix it with a little bit of raw honey), cinnamon can keep rashes, skin allergies and also acne at bay.
The reason why it works so well in the acne department is because it contains properties that are able to kill the acne-causing bacteria P. acnes. Just make a paste out of cinnamon and water or cinnamon water and honey. Apply it directly onto your pimples (it's best if they aren't ones that you have popped; cinnamon is strong and could irritate those), and let the paste sit for 15 minutes. If you do this three times a week, you should see a significant difference within seven days or so.
9. Take Off Your Bra When You Get Home
For the most part, I work from home. Because I wear anywhere from a GG to an H bra (depending on where I buy it), this means that I usually don't have a bra on. This also means that whenever I go out and put one on, there is a part of me that can't wait to get back home, just to take that bad boy off.
Sometimes, depending on what the weather is like outside, I will notice a pimple or two, right in the spots that my bra was covering. I know what's causing it—sweat and my skin's inability to breathe as much as it would like to. This is why it's important to wash your bras (every couple of weeks is fine) using a detergent that has as few chemicals as possible. It's also a good idea to get professionally fitted for a bra on an annual basis (because your shoulder straps should not be digging into your skin, which could also potentially lead to breakouts). And yes, so that your skin can feel free again, take your bra off as soon as you walk through your front door. (Spraying a little witch hazel onto your shoulders and back can't hurt either!)
10. Change Your Sheets Regularly
I'm hoping that you change your bedding every week, just like your mama made you do back when you were little. But if you do happen to skimp on that sometimes, here's a blaring reminder of how important it is to do. 6-8 hours of your life, every night, is spent in bed. This means that some of the dead skin cell shedding that we talked about earlier? Yeah, it happens, right in the midst of you catching some much needed zzz's. By changing your sheets, it helps to keep the cells from clinging to your pores. If you sleep naked, that's even better, because you won't sweat as much; that will reduce your chances for back and shoulder breakouts even more. Sweet dreams!
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
What Your Breakouts Could Be Telling You About Your Health
7 Natural Remedies For Hormonal Acne
6 Ways To Unclog Your Pores & Minimize Breakouts
This Is Why Your Skincare Routine Isn't Working
Feature image by Getty Images
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After being a regular contributor for about four years and being (eh hem) MIA in 2022, Shellie is back penning for the platform (did you miss her? LOL).
In some ways, nothing has changed and in others, everything has. For now, she'll just say that she's working on the 20th anniversary edition of her first book, she's in school to take life coaching to another level and she's putting together a platform that supports and encourages Black men because she loves them from head to toe.
Other than that, she still works with couples, she's still a doula, she's still not on social media and her email contact (missnosipho@gmail.com) still hasn't changed (neither has her request to contact her ONLY for personal reasons; pitch to the platform if you have story ideas).
Life is a funny thing but if you stay calm, moments can come full circle and this is one of them. No doubt about it.
Amber Riley has the type of laugh that sticks with you long after the raspy, rhythmic sounds have ceased. It punctuates her sentences sometimes, whether she’s giving a chuckle to denote the serious nature of something she just said or throwing her head back in rip-roarious laughter after a joke. She laughs as if she understands the fragility of each minute. She chooses laughter often with the understanding that future joy is not guaranteed.
Credit: Ally Green
The sound of her laughter is rivaled only by her singing voice, an emblem of the past and the future resilience of Black women stretched over a few octaves. On Fox’s Glee, her character Mercedes Jones was portrayed, perhaps unfairly, as the vocal duel to Rachel Berry (Lea Michele), offering rough, full-throated belts behind her co-star’s smooth, pristine vocals. Riley’s always been more than the singer who could deliver a finishing note, though.
Portraying Effie White, she displayed the dynamic emotions of a song such as “And I'm Telling You I'm Not Going” in Dreamgirls on London’s West End without buckling under the historic weight of her predecessors. With her instrument, John Mayer’s “Gravity” became a religious experience, a belted hymnal full of growls and churchy riffs. In her voice, Nicole Scherzinger once said she heard “the power of God.”
Credit: Ally Green
Riley’s voice has been a staple throughout pop culture for nearly 15 years now. Her tone has become so distinguishable that most viewers of Fox’s The Masked Singer recognized the multihyphenate even before it was revealed that she was Harp, the competition-winning, gold-masked figure with an actual harp strapped to her back.
Still, it wasn’t until recently that Riley began to feel like she’d found her voice. This sounds unbelievable. But she’s not referring to the one she uses on stage. She’s referencing the voice that speaks to who she is at her core. “Therapy kind of gave me the training to speak my mind,” the 37-year-old says. “It’s not something we’re taught, especially as Black women. I got so comfortable in [doing so], and I really want other people, especially Black women, to get more comfortable in that space.”
“Therapy kind of gave me the training to speak my mind. It’s not something we’re taught, especially as Black women."
If you ask Riley’s manager, Myisha Brooks, she’ll tell you the foundation of who the multihyphenate is hasn’t changed much since she was a kid growing up in Compton. “She is who she is from when I met her back when she was singing in the front of the church to back when she landed major roles in film and TV,” Brooks says. Time has allowed Riley to grow more comfortable, giving fans a more intimate glimpse into her life, including her mental health journey and the ins and outs of show business.
The actress/singer has been in therapy since 2019, although she suffered from depression and anxiety way before that. In a recent interview with Jason Lee, she recalls having suicidal ideation as a kid. By the time she started seeing a psychologist and taking antidepressants in her thirties, her body had become jittery, a physical reminder of the trauma stacked high inside her. “I was shaking in [my therapist’s] office,” she tells xoNecole. “My fight or flight was on such a high level. I was constantly in survival mode. My heart was beating fast all the time. All I did was sweat.”
There wasn’t just childhood trauma to account for. After auditioning for American Idol and being turned away by producers, Riley began working for Ikea and nearly missed her Glee audition because her car broke down on the highway while en route. Thankfully, Riley had been cast to play Mercedes Jones. American Idol had temporarily convinced her she wasn’t cut out for the entertainment industry, but this was validation that she was right where she belonged. Glee launched in 2009 with the promise of becoming Riley’s big break.
In some ways, it was. The show introduced Riley to millions of fans and catapulted her into major Hollywood circles. But in other ways, it became a reminder of the types of roles Black women, especially those who are plus-sized, are relegated to. Behind the scenes, Riley says she fought for her character "to have a voice" but eventually realized her efforts were useless. "It finally got to a point where I was like, this is not my moment. I'm not who they're choosing, and this is just going to have to be a job for me for now," she says. "And, that's okay because it pays my bills, I still get to be on television, I'm doing more than any other Black plus-sized women that I'm seeing right now on screen."
The actress can recognize now that she was navigating issues associated with trauma and low self-esteem at the time. She now knows that she's long had anxiety and depression and can recognize the ways in which she was triggered by how the cult-like following of the show conflicted with her individual, isolated experiences behind the scenes. But she was in her early '20s back then. She didn't yet have the language or the tools to process how she was feeling.
Riley says she eventually sought out medical intervention. "When you're in Hollywood, and you go to a doctor, they give you pills," she says, sharing a part of her story that she'd never revealed publicly before now. "[I was] on medication and developing a habit of medicating to numb, not understanding I was developing an addiction to something that's not fixing my problem. If anything, it's making it worse."
“[I was] on medication and developing a habit of medicating to numb, not understanding I was developing an addiction to something that’s not fixing my problem. If anything it’s making it worse.”
Credit: Ally Green
At one point, while in her dressing room on set, she rested her arm on a curling iron without realizing it. It wasn't until her makeup artist alerted her that she even realized her skin was burning. Once she noticed, she says she was "so zonked out on pills" that she barely reacted. Speaking today, she holds up her arm and motions towards a scar that remains from the incident. She sought help for her reliance on the pills, but it would still be years before she finally attended therapy.
This stress was only compounded by the trauma of growing up in poverty and the realities of being a "contract worker." "Imagine going from literally one week having to borrow a car to get to set to the next week being on a private jet to New York City," she says. After Glee ended, so did the rides on private planes. The fury of opportunities she expected to follow her appearance on the show failed to materialize. She wasn't even 30 yet, and she was already forced to consider if she'd hit her career peak.
. . .
We’re only four minutes into our Zoom call before Riley delivers her new adage to me. “My new mantra is ‘humility does not serve me.’ Humility does not serve Black women. The world works so hard to humble us anyway,” she says.
On this Thursday afternoon in April, the LA-based entertainer is seated inside her closet/dressing room wearing a cerulean blue tank top with matching shorts and eating hot wings. This current phase of healing hinges on balance. It’s about having discipline and consistency, but not at the risk of inflexibility. She was planning to head to the gym, for instance, but she’s still tired from the “exhausting” day before. Instead, she’s spent her day receiving a massage, eating some chicken wings, and planning to spend quality time with friends. “I’m not going to beat myself up for it. I’m not going to talk down to myself. I’m going to eat my chicken wings, and then tomorrow I’m [back] in the gym,” she says.
“My new mantra is ‘humility does not serve me.’ Humility does not serve Black women. The world works so hard to humble us anyway."
This is the balance with which she's been approaching much of her life these days. It's why she's worried less about whether or not people see her as someone who is humble. She'd rather be respected. "I think you should be a person that's easy to work with, but in the moments where I have to ruffle feathers and make waves, I'm not shying away from that anymore. You can do it in love, you don't have to be nasty about it, but I had to finally be comfortable with the fact that setting boundaries around my life – in whatever aspect, whether that's personal or business – people are not going to like it. Some people are not going to have nice things to say about you, and you gotta be okay with it," she says.
When Amber talks about the constant humbling of Black women in Hollywood, I think of the entertainers before her who have suffered from this. The brilliant, consistent, overqualified Black women who have spoken of having to fight for opportunities and fair pay. Aretha Franklin. Viola Davis. Tracee Ellis Ross. There's a long list of stars whose success hasn't mirrored their experiences behind the scenes.
Credit: Ally Green
If Black women outside of Hollywood are struggling to decrease the pay gap, so, too, are their wealthier, more famous peers.
Riley says there’s been progress in recent years, but only in small ways and for a limited group of people. “This business is exhausting. The goalpost is constantly moving, and sometimes it’s unfair,” she says. But, I have to say it’s the love that keeps you going.”
“There’s no way you can continue to be in this business and not love it, especially being a plus-sized Black woman,” she continues. “We’re still niche. We’re still not main characters.”
"There’s no way you can continue to be in this business and not love it, especially being a plus-sized Black woman. We’re still niche. We’re still not main characters.”
Last year, Riley starred alongside Raven Goodwin in the Lifetime thriller Single Black Female (a modern, diversified take on 1992’s Single White Female). It was more than a leading role for the actress, it also served as proof that someone who looks like her can front a successful project without it hinging on her identity. It showcased that the characters she portrays don’t “have to be about being a big girl. It can just be a regular story.”
Riley sees her work in music as an extension of her efforts to push past the rigid stereotypes in entertainment. Take her appearance on The Masked Singer, for instance. Riley said she decided to perform Mayer’s “Gravity” after being told she couldn’t sing it years earlier. “I wanted to do ‘Gravity’ on Glee. [I] was told no, because that’s not a song that Mercedes would do,” she says. “That was a full circle moment for me, doing that on that show and to hear what it is they had to say.”
As Scherzinger praised the “anointed” performance, a masked Riley began to cry, her chest heaving as she stood on stage, her eyes shielded from view. “You have to understand, I have really big names – casting directors, producers, show creators – that constantly tell me ‘I’m such a big fan. Your talent is unmatched.’ Hire me, then,” she says, reflecting on the moment.
Recently, she’s been in the studio working on original music, the follow-up to her independently-released debut EP, 2020’s Riley. The sequel to songs such as the anthemic “Big Girl Energy” and the reflective ballad “A Moment” on Riley, this new project hones in on the singer’s R&B roots with sensual grooves such as the tentatively titled “All Night.” “You said I wasn’t shit, turns out that I’m the shit. Then you called me a bitch, turns out that I’m that bitch. You said no one would want me, well you should call your homies,” she sings on the tentatively titled “Lately,” a cut about reflecting on a past relationship. From the forthcoming project, xoNecole received five potential tracks. Fans likely already know the strengths and contours of Riley’s vocals, but these new songs are her strongest, most confident offerings as an artist.
“I am so much more comfortable as a writer, and I know who I am as an artist now. I’m evolving as a human being, in general, so I’m way more vulnerable in my music. I’m way more willing to talk about whatever is on my mind. I don’t stop myself from saying what it is I want to say,” she says.
Credit: Ally Green
“Every era and alliteration of Amber, the baseline is ‘Big Girl Energy.’ That’s the name of her company,” her manager Brooks says, referencing the imprint through which Riley releases her music after getting out of a label deal several years ago. “It’s just what she stands for. She’s not just talking about size, it’s in all things. Whether it’s putting your big girl pants on and having to face a boardroom full of executives or sell yourself in front of a casting agent. It’s her trying to achieve the things she wants to do in life.”
Riley says she has big dreams beyond releasing this new music, too. She’d love to star in a rom-com with Winston Duke. She hasn't starred in a biopic yet, but she’d revel in the opportunity to portray Rosetta Tharpe on screen. She’s determined that her previous setbacks won’t stop her from dreaming big.
“I think one of my superpowers is resilience because, at the end of the day, I’m going to kick, scream, cry, cuss, be mad and disappointed, but I’m going to get up and risk having to deal with it all again. It’s worth it for the happy moments,” she says.
If Riley seems more comfortable and confident professionally, it’s because of the work she’s been doing in her personal life.
She’d previously spoken to xoNecole about becoming engaged to a man she discovered in a post on the site, but she called things off last year. For Valentine’s Day, she revealed her new boyfriend publicly. “I decided to post him on Valentine’s Day, partially because I was in the dog house. I got in trouble with him,” she says, half-joking before turning serious. “The breakup was never going to stop me from finding love. Or at least trying. I don’t owe anybody a happily ever after. People break up. It happens. When it was good, it was good. When it was bad, it was terrible, hunny. I had to get the fuck up out of there. You find happiness, and you enjoy it and work through it.”
Credit: Ally Green
"I don’t owe anybody a happily ever after. People break up. It happens. When it was good, it was good. When it was bad, it was terrible, hunny. I had to get the fuck up out of there. You find happiness and you enjoy it and work through it.”
With her ex, Riley was pretty outspoken about her relationship, even appearing in content for Netflix with him. This time around is different. She’s not hiding her boyfriend of eight months, but she’s more protective of him, especially because he’s a father and isn’t interested in becoming a public figure.
She’s traveling more, too. It’s a deliberate effort on her part to enjoy her money and reject the trauma she’s developed after experiencing poverty in her childhood. “I live in constant fear of being broke. I don’t think you ever don’t remember that trauma or move past that. Now I travel and I’m like, listen, if it goes, it goes. I’m not saying [to] be reckless, but I deserve to enjoy my hard work.”
After everything she’s been through, she certainly deserves to finally let loose a bit. “I have to have a life to live,” she says. “I’ve got to have a life worth fighting for.”
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Squeeze Your Way To Ecstasy: How This Masturbation Technique Can Make You Orgasm
What if I told you that you can achieve an orgasm by simply squeezing your thighs together? Believe it or not, this technique has been known to lead to some seriously orgasmic experiences and is gaining popularity among people who want to explore new ways of reaching orgasm. There's a word for this, it’s called syntribation. The act of squeezing or rubbing the thighs together to create friction and pressure until climax.
First, let's talk about the anatomy behind this technique. The pelvic nerves responsible for arousal and orgasm pass through the thighs, so squeezing them can stimulate these nerves and send a rush of pleasure to your genitals. Additionally, the muscles in your thighs tense up during orgasm, so squeezing them can replicate that sensation and potentially lead to the real deal.
How To Do Syntribation
Start by crossing your legs and squeezing your thighs. Keep going until you feel a pleasurable pressure on your clit/glans area. Another method is by putting your hands in the middle of your inner thighs. Then cross your legs and squeeze your thighs as tight as you can. Note that your hands are not doing anything - they are just sandwiched between your thighs. Using this method will provide more pressure and squeezing sensation.
You can also practice syntribation with sex toys as long as they’re not chunky vibes and dildos. Simply place the sex toy in the middle of your thighs, and let it vibrate as you syntribate.
Is Syntribation Safe?
While syntribation masturbation is a relatively new masturbation technique, it does not pose any major risks to your physical health. The one potential risk is possibly skin irritation from friction, but that can be avoided by wearing long pants or using a cushion between your legs.
The Benefits of Syntribation
As with any masturbation technique, this one will have some health benefits, including a boosted immune system, reduced stress, glowing skin, stronger vaginal walls, and so on. Syntribation masturbation can offer a new way to explore your sexuality and achieve sexual pleasure. It can be a great alternative for people who prefer not to use their hands or fingers during masturbation.
In addition to enhancing feelings of pleasure and relaxation, syntribation may even appeal to voyeurs and exhibitionists who are intrigued by the idea of public play.
Is Syntribation Effective?
The effectiveness of syntribation masturbation varies from person to person. Some people may find it more pleasurable than traditional methods of masturbation, while others may not enjoy it at all. It ultimately comes down to individual preferences and experiences. However, if you are looking to try something new and explore different ways to achieve orgasm, syntribation masturbation can be worth giving a try.
Although syntribation masturbation may sound unusual, it is gaining popularity as a way to explore new methods of achieving sexual pleasure. It’s hands-free and has no major risks. Even though the effectiveness of syntribation masturbation varies from person to person, depending on individual preferences and experiences, ultimately, I think it’s worth giving it a try.
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