
Even though I am a proud Gemini, it’s no secret that my favorite month of the year is actually October (which is a part of the reason why I decided to release my third book during that month). Since fall is my favorite season, typically, October brings all of the quintessential autumn weather right along with it (although, if you live in Music City like I do, this year, it’s not until mid-October that the highs will start to be in the mid-60s…UGH).
And y’all know what that means — pretty leaves, shorter days (I actually like that part), and cooler weather for layering. Hell, for some, it might even bring about cuddle season (I rolled a few times at the Cuddle Season series that’s on Tubi right now).
And with the changes that Mother Nature is about to have in store for us, it’s important that you do a bit of tweaking to your skincare regimen (because you do have one of those…right?) so that your skin, from head to toe, can remain just as beautiful as it has all summer long.
With summer ending and fall arriving just days from now, please take a moment to make sure that you’ve got the following things in mind for how to prep (and pamper) your skin before autumn makes its full and official arrival.

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1. Make Sure Your Skin Products Have (More) Water in Them
Even if you live in a climate where it rains more (or seems more humid) during the fall, you still need to up your hydration — both inside and out. As far as your skin goes, it’s because, between colder weather, brisk winds, and dry heat that comes from central heat and air, it becomes easier for your skin to lose the moisture that it needs in order to remain looking supple and moist.
So, as far as your skin products go, this is a good time to switch over to ones that have water (or more water) as their base. Besides buying products that say “water” on the packaging, look on the label to see if/that water is the first ingredient that’s listed in order to check this tip off of your to-do list.
2. Use a Thicker Moisturizer
Speaking of maintaining hydration, in order to “lock in” the moisture that is in your skin, it’s a good idea to go with a thicker moisturizer as well. Some skincare experts say that it’s a good idea to opt for the type of moisturizer that contains ceramides; that’s because they help to increase hydration, literally protect your skin from environmental elements (including outdoor pollution), reduce inflammation, help prevent and/or speed up the healing process of breakouts and work to soften the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles — and you need all of this during the fall season, for sure.
3. Try a Hyaluronic Acid-Based Serum
If you don’t already use hyaluronic acid, please check out, “Why Your Skin, Hair, And Nails Need Hyaluronic Acid Like...Yesterday” because I think it will convince you to start. Between at-home chemical peels and this type of acid, I have definitely seen my skin appear brighter and more even-toned.
The reasons why a serum that has hyaluronic acid in it would be ideal for the fall is because it can actually help your skin to produce more collagen and elastin, it can add hydration to your skin, and it can “stretch” it so that any fine lines and wrinkles that you may have won’t appear as prominent. Serums, specifically, are beneficial because they contain other ingredients that can unclog your pores as well as fade out dark spots (just an FYI).

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4. Consider an Overnight Mask (Once a Week)
You probably already know that when you sleep, your body rejuvenates itself — and your skin is no exception. That’s why it’s so important to have a nighttime routine for your skin and that it includes applying some type of moisturizer.
If you want to deeply moisturize your skin (especially your face and neck), consider applying an overnight mask (which is sometimes referred to as a sleep mask) once a week or so.
Not only does it help to moisturize your skin, but an overnight mask can also serve as a barrier to keep dirt, dust, and debris off of your skin while you rest; plus, it nourishes your skin cells as they replicate themselves. If you’ve never tried an overnight mask before, People has a list of options that you can check out here, while Byrdie has a list that you can check out here.
5. DO NOT Heat Up Your Bathwater
If there’s nothing that you enjoy more on a chilly autumn day than to come home, disrobe, and soak in a bathtub of water that’s about as hot as you can stand it, trust me, I totally get it. At the same time, I am going to encourage you to rethink doing that. Why? Well, as tranquil as super-hot water may be, if you indulge so on a constant basis, it can dehydrate your body, which can lead to dry and itchy skin.
That’s why it’s ideal to bathe in a water temperature that is no more than a couple of degrees higher than your body temperature at the most. Your skin will thank you if you do.
6. Pamper with Some Black Spruce Essential Oil
Every chance I get, I try to bring a new (as far as the platform is concerned) kind of essential oil up. That’s because, as I’ve said a billion times before, essential oils are one of my favorite things ever! Well today, I’m curious about if you’ve ever heard of black spruce oil. The fact that the oil comes from the black spruce pine tree kind of makes it fitting for this article since Christmas is (wow) just a few months away.
Anyway, when it comes to reducing stress, improving the quality of your sleep, deeply cleansing your skin, bringing balance to your hormones, and reducing inflammation, this is an essential oil that can make all of that happen for you (just to make sure to dilute it with distilled water or a carrier oil first; essential oils tend to be pretty potent).

7. Wear Cotton, Polyester or Silk in Between Your Wool
Wool can definitely keep you warm. Sometimes, it can be itchy as all get out too; that’s due to the lanolin that’s in the fabric — and when you have a sensitivity to it, that can irritate your skin. Although some people end up with the type of wool allergy that makes it best for them not to wear wool at all, if yours is only minor, there is a workaround.
Do your best to “shield your skin” by putting on something that is made out of cotton, polyester, or silk before putting your wool garment on. That will serve as a buffer and also keep the wool from drying your skin out. Plus, who doesn’t like the layered look? Exactly.
8. Invest in Some Foot Balm and Moisture-Wicking Socks
Your feet are going to be covered up during the fall and winter more than they ever were in the spring and summer seasons; that’s why you definitely need to get some type of foot balm for them. Not only can it help to prevent dry feet and cracked heels, but foot balms are also helpful when it comes to keeping minor foot infections at bay, preventing blisters from occurring, and keeping odor from becoming (too much of) a problem.
While you’re at it, make sure to get yourself some moisture-wicking socks, especially if your feet have a tendency to sweat a lot. The cool thing about moisture-wicking fabrics is not only can they keep sweat from irritating you, but they also work to keep your feet nice and dry during inclement weather.
9. Sip on Some White Tea
If herbal tea is totally your thing and you’ve got some hair goals that you want to reach over the next several months, check out “10 Teas That Are Great For The Fall Season — As Far As Hair Growth Is Concerned.” As far as your skin goes, a tea that you need to add to your collection is white tea.
From an overall health standpoint, white tea is good for you because it is loaded with antioxidants, fights oral decay, and reduces your risk of heart disease. The reason why it’s great for your skin is because the antioxidants that are in it can help fight off free radicals, boost the production of collagen, and slow down the signs of aging.
10. Roll Out That Humidifier
I’m actually a big fan of humidifiers. So much, in fact, that I once penned an entire piece that was devoted to them (check out “10 Really Good Reasons To Get Yourself A Humidifier This Fall”). I’m closing this fall skin prep list by shouting humidifiers out because if your HVAC unit is drying the hell out of your hair, a humidifier will put moisture back in so that your skin remains hydrated while you’re indoors. That way, your skin can remain moist and keep that youthful glow right into the coldest months of the year. Perfect.
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Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns
Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.
It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.
Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.
At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.

In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.

In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.

And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.

We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.

So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.

That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.

This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
Someone's Trying To Hook You Up? Ask These 6 Questions First
As we all know, it’s cuffing season. We’re also on the cusp of the holiday season, and that happens to be the time of year when a lot of people get engaged. And that’s why the fall and winter seasons are the times of the year when folks wanna play matchmaker.
And so, sis, if at least one person in your life is currently trying to set you up with someone they know right now — charge it to it being “tis the season” more than anything else. Because let’s be real — folks tend to be more lovey-dovey than ever right about now, and that is usually what inspires them to try to get as many people boo/bae’d up as possible. Chile…CHILE.
It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
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Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
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