Lupita Nyong'o Epitomizes The Beauty & Versatility Of Natural Hair
When Lupita Nyong'o spoke on her relationship with her beautiful, natural "kinky" hair for Allure magazine, it was seriously a moment unlike any other.
Up until a few years ago, the natural hair movement and celebration of natural hair textures was seriously an anomaly. Even then, seeing women with what is considered more kinky, coily-textured, 4C hair was few and far between.
From seeing her on red carpets to powerful movies that literally push #BlackMagic like Black Panther, it's nothing short of incredible to see a dark-skinned, 4C-textured hair woman speaking on the culture of hair. The African beauty recently told Allure:
"I like the term 'kinky.' Some people don't like that term, but when I think about my hair, I think of it as African kinky hair."
"But I'm not really in deep with the politics of it all and the language choice. I speak just from my own experience or my own preference. Curly hair differs so much."
Her stylist, Vernon Francois, also told the magazine, "Lupita and I wanted to show that coily or kinky hair has many strengths and can be worn in lots of different ways, celebrating its beauty and versatility."
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Seeing someone like Lupita, one of the most coveted and in-the-moment stars in the world right now speak on her love for her hair, validated many of us who may have very rarely felt seen before. Now, don't get me wrong - Lupita is not the only celebrity or person in media to shake up the hair conversation. All I'm saying is it's impactful AF to see one of the most sought-after actresses rocking and owning her hair texture that has previously been dismissed.
First of all, Lupita's natural hair and grace shows us all that simply being isn't always a political statement or act - black hair can be celebrated without us having an alternative agenda. When Melissa Harris Parry made commentary on FKA Twigs on the cover of Elle, she explicitly said, "If we allow our hair to simply grow out of our heads in its natural state, most people will assume that we are making a social and political statement."
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Of course, the first thing I want to know is, can we just live? Does everything, even down to our hair, have to be something to be picked and prodded at? Why can't this be normal? Have Lupita tell it, it can. The actress leads by example and shows us that we can simply "be" by continuing to be proud and unapologetically ourselves. And that the best way to normalize something is to continuously show it without always having to justify or explain. As women, we often feel the need to do that when really, we don't need to.
Lupita is infamously known for rocking a short 'do, however experimenting with braids and extensions shows us that when taken care of properly, 4C hair has the flexibility to do anything! Women like Lupita show us that nobody is left out in the possibility of exploring what makes you fierce and fabulous!
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Lupita's hair brings a call to action for more visibility and inclusivity in the natural hair community. Oftentimes, 4C textures are only shown when they are a TWA or a full-blown out afro. Many women in-between don't see themselves, and especially not when it comes to the big screen. To see someone rockin' her hair and you can see there hasn't been a huge push to alter her hair pattern, straighten anything, twist-out anything, or even slick edges down? THAT'S encouraging for all those that never see that before.
It challenges us to think of "beauty" and what it is for the Black community.
If you want to do something to your hair, cool! But knowing that if you don't, you're still amazing and beautiful, is equally encouraging. We're hoping that this conversation continues to happen and pushes more actresses of color with various hair textures to be represented on the screen.
No matter your hair texture or type, it can always be a bit challenging when imagining how others will view you. That's why it's important for us to continue to champion women like Lupita or Danai or Letitia on speaking out and showing all levels of Blackness and our beauty. That's why we have to applaud and push for more movies like Black Panther that will show unapologetic, unaltered, and unfiltered Blackness for all.
Marvel's Black Panther
And even when you're feeling trapped or self-conscious about your coils? Think of the fierce, badass women in your life who show you that the best love starts from within. That's a lesson we all can learn from.
Check out Lupita's full March cover story with Allure here.
Featured image by Giphy
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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How A Stay At Switzerland's Luxurious 7132 Hotel Reminded Me To Live The Life I Deserve
Sometimes, as women—especially as single Black women—we simply need to be reminded that we are deserving of living a life we dream of. Even if that means creating it for ourselves. I recently set out on a weeklong trip to Switzerland, a trip I’ve been wanting to take for years, and near the end of my visit, I had an epiphany.
“DeAnna, this is the life you deserve,” I thought to myself as I took in the gorgeous bathroom in my suite at the famous 7132 Hotel and Thermal Spa. It was one of the most luxurious hotels (and bathrooms) I had ever stayed in—and that’s saying a lot for someone who often travels for work.
To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
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I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
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That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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