Kelis Talks Life On The Farm & The Importance Of Pleasure
I don't know who needs to hear this but self-care isn't selfish. Contrary to popular belief, sleep is not exclusively for the rich and the hustle will hustle you out of your peace of mind if you let it, but Kelis isn't about to let the grind, grind her to death.
In a recent interview with SSENSE, she reminded us that our happiness is a national treasure that should be protected at all costs, even if that cost is packing up all your sh*t, selling your home in Glendale, and purchasing a 24-acre farm 80 miles outside of Los Angeles. She told the publication:
"It feels like I earned this. I can walk outside butt naked."
Although she, her husband and two children are still settling down in their new home, Kelis says that her recent move was a much-needed transition.
"We just moved, so I felt unsettled for a while. Now, we get up in the morning and I have my own personal routine. I pray, take some time to myself, and then the kids get up and I make breakfast."
While Kelis has spent much of her life in the spotlight, she says that with maturity, comes an appreciation for seclusion:
"You've got two decades [of that] and you're like, 'I'm okay being 30 minutes away from a store.' It's good for me. I'm able to sit there in the mornings before anyone wakes up and I'm able to pray in silence. When I look out the window and I see these massive dogs playing and my kids are chasing them, it looks like a freaking commercial."
As women, we spend so much of our time taking care of others that self-care becomes irrelevant but it's impossible to fill from an empty cup and you can't help anyone until you help yourself. In the interview, Kelis also reminded us of the importance of finding joy in life's simple joys (without feeling guilty about it).
"There should be no guilt in it. It's the little pleasures. It's about me, for me. I do enough for everybody else. It shouldn't bother nobody. My life is filled with all these little things that I love."
"Even my little ones, like the littlest, something would come on the TV or on our drive and he's like, 'Mama, you're going to love that. You love that, right?' He's four. And I do it for them. I want them to take notice of the things that they love and the little joys."
Kelis says that although her newfound lifestyle may be inconvenient for some, she sees the change as a "reclaiming" of her rights as a Black American:
"It's inconvenient for someone who cares and wants to be in the mix. I have no desire [for that], so it's everything I've ever wanted. When I started to do research, in the 1920s, black-owned farms in the United States were at 25, almost 30 percent. We are now under two percent, because we were bamboozled into giving up this land. That happens so much in our history. But that's part of the reason we're even here, because of the skills that we inherently have to grow, understand the land, and use things to benefit our health. There's an essence of reclaiming your rights that I love."
To read the full interview, click here!
Featured image by Giphy
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Sheila Rashid's Androgynous Approach To Unisex Clothing Is A Lesson In Embracing Individuality
The ItGirl 100 List is a celebration of 100 Black women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table.
For Sheila Rashid, it all started with some free-hand drawings and a few strokes of paint.
The Chicago-based clothing designer and creative director of Sheila Rashid Brand recalls using her spare time in high school to hand paint designs on t-shirts and distressed hoodies, distributing them to classmates as walking billboards for her art.
Rashid sought to pursue fashion design at Columbia College in Chicago but eventually took the self-taught route to build upon her knack for crafting one-of-a-kind, androgynous pieces.
Courtesy
Thanks to the mentorship of local designers taking her under their wings, Rashid was able to gain valuable experience in putting together collections and creating patterns; equipping her with them with the necessary skills to pursue her own collections.
After two years of living in New York, Rashid returned home to the Chi and uncovered the unique flair she could offer the city. “I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world,” she tells xoNecole. “That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
For the Midwest native, inspiration comes from her time around creative peers and the city’s notorious winters — known to be a main character in many Chicagoans stories. “It's a different perspective and mindset when I'm making stuff because of the weather here,” she explains. “When we get summer, it’s ‘Summertime Chi’ — it's amazing. It's beautiful. Still, I find myself always making clothes that cater to the winter.”
"I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world. That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
Courtesy
Many designers have a signature aesthetic or theme in their creations. In Rashid’s design story, dancing between the lines of femininity and masculinity is how she’s been able to distinguish herself within the industry. Her androgynous clothing has garnered the eye of celebrities like Zendaya, Chance the Rapper, WNBA star Sydney Colson, and more — showing her range and approach to designs with inclusivity in mind.
“I think I do reflect my own style,” she says. “When I do make pieces, I'm very tomboyish, androgynous. My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes.” From denim to overalls, and color-drenched outerwear, Rashid has mastered the structure of statement pieces that tell a story.
“Each collection, I never know what's going to be the thing I'm going to focus on. I try to reflect my own style and have fun with the storytelling,” she shares. “I look at it more like it's my art in this small way of expressing myself, so it's not that calculated.”
"My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes."
Courtesy
Still, if you were able to add up all the moments within Rashid’s 20-year career in design, one theme that has multiplied her into becoming an “ItGirl” is her confidence to take up space within the fashion industry as a queer, Black woman. “Being an ItGirl is about being yourself, loving what you do, finding your niche, and mastering that,” she says.
No matter where you are on your ItGirl journey, Rashid says to always remain persistent and never hesitate to share your art with the world. “Don’t give up. Even if it's something small, finish it and don't be afraid to put it out,” she says, “It's about tackling your own fear of feeling like you have to please everybody, but just please yourself, and that's good enough.”
To learn more about the ItGirl 100 List, view the full list here.
Featured image Courtesy