I Downsized To Travel The World & Live My Dream Life
Have you ever felt so uncomfortable in your life that nothing makes sense anymore?
You keep falling in the same type of relationships with the same type of men. Your career seems to be going nowhere.
You no longer feel comfortable in your own home. And you keep waking up every day saying to yourself, "This can't be all there is to life."
Well, that's what happened to me over the past couple of years. Something kept telling me I was off my path and I need to do something to get back on it. Call it God, call it intuition, or just a general sense of jadedness – that thing was clawing at my soul to the point where I couldn't ignore it any longer.
After a long trip home to Jamaica for some much needed rest and recovery from my LA life, the discomfort led to clarity. The call to travel became embedded in my heart and as soon as I returned home, I started a secret plan for 2018. I would give myself a year to plan and save and then I would make my move.
Oh, but we all know that's not how callings work. As I got back into my the groove of daily life, started a new job, and worked on my plan, the sick feeling of discomfort I thought I abated crept back up.
God was asking me, "Girl, if I planted this seed in your heart, why don't you trust me to help it grow and thrive?"
I realized it was either now or never. I had no children, no significant other, and no major commitments. All that was holding me back was an apartment full of furniture and I knew there was no way I was going to let "things" that had no real value to me hold me back. Unable to suppress my inner voice anymore, I gave in and accelerated the plan.
All I had to do was get rid of my stuff. If you are looking to do the same thing, here are a few ways I got the job done:
1. Part Ways with Things You Don't Need
The first and most important thing you have to do when downsizing is deciding what you want to keep. For me, this was easy. I knew I was leaving my apartment with one carry-on suitcase and a backpack. That was it. OK, maybe it wasn't that easy. What do you do when you have five favorite dresses, but you only have space for one? And it better be a versatile one. And what if I want to trade out clothes after a few months? Do I send a box to my mom's or a friend's?
After much contemplation, I decided that very few items needed to be kept in storage (meaning mom's or a friend's) - only winter clothes, a few sentimental things (journals, photos, etc.), and important documents. Everything else will have to find a new home.
2. Sell Furniture in a Forum You Trust
Let's face it, selling furniture/household items was not fun. Between posting, reposting, chasing down leads, and waiting for people who never showed up, the process can make any sane person just want to open a window and throw everything outside like it was an ex-lover's favorite things.
And if that wasn't enough stress, as a single woman and living alone, having random people show up to my house was a huge safety concern. Because of this, I decided to only use forums I was familiar with. Groups on Facebook I've chatted in before, my own FB page, and FB's marketplace were my go-to's. Facebook was my go-to for selling everything. Being able to check a person's profile or knowing that we have common friends eased many of my fears.
To take precautions further, I only gave away my building address (not apt #) to most people and met them downstairs if they purchased items that were easy for me to carry. When I sold my large farm table to a young man, I asked a friend to hang out with me when the purchaser wanted to come by. I also tried my best to schedule meetings in the mornings before work or the early evenings.
Being safe while inviting strangers into your home should be your number one priority. Don't let desperation cause you to put yourself at risk.
3. Donate Towels, Sheets, Pillows & Blankets to an Animal Shelter
This was a daunting one for me. What in the world do I with my old towels, sheets, blankets, and pillows? Most things I have I knew I could sell but who the heck wants my old dingy towels? Thank God for Google!
Not knowing what to do, I looked up ways to recycle these items. Out of all the ways to reuse these items, donating them to an animal shelter made the most sense. Animal shelters use these items for animal bedding, to dry them after cleaning, and other necessities. I've never been a pet person but it definitely brings me comfort to know that my old blankets can help provide a comfy home to animals in need.
4. Sell, Trade, Pass Down & Donate Used Clothing
From what I've read, donating used clothing to thrift stores can be tricky. Most clothes you donate never make it to the sales floor. So, in order to minimize the chances of my clothes ending up in the landfill anyway, I tried these options first:
- Sell/Trade: Crossroads Trading Company is one of my favorite thrift stores in LA. They do an amazing job of curating items people will actually buy again. Knowing that I buy most of my items directly from designer showrooms, I knew heading here first would be a good bet. Better yet, with the money I made from the sale, I bought my carry-on and backpack for the trip. Can you say win-win?!
- Pass Down: During this process, I totally forgot that I had a little sister who loves fashion as much as me and wears the same size, but while rattling off my list of to-dos she quickly reminded me fi ship some of di clothes dem. PERF!
- Donate: Most of my clothing and shoes (and some household items) went to the Good Shepherd Center for Women and Children.
5. Sell Books to a Used Bookstore
Since living in DTLA, I have completely fallen in love with the Last Bookstore. Growing up, I loooved bookstores but I've never been in a used bookstore. I thought they were just fun mystery locations in fantasy films. The Last Bookstore is everything in a mystery movie come to life and then some. It married my love for books with an adventure. So when looking for a place to give my favorite reads a second life, I knew exactly where to go. What you get for the books isn't much but it's a lot better than nothing.
6. Give It Away for Free
When all else fails, list your stuff for free. When I was down to the wire and less than 24 hours away from jumping on a plane, I put up a sign in my apartment lobby and listed all the items I had left for free. At that point, just the mere fact that someone was willing to come and physically move things that I no longer had the energy to haggle with people for was enough for me. I was beat!
I wish I could say I made it through this whole process with minimal waste but to my dismay, I think a fair amount of items still ended up in the trash. I really felt I failed the whole mission of minimal waste because of it but I can say I gave it a hell of an effort.
My first stop? San Juan del Sur in Nicaragua. I can't wait to see what this new life has in store for me.
*Originally published on For Laura Gennie
Donalee Curtis is an Island girl on the go, exploring her love for writing and culture while traveling the world. Check her out at donaleecurtis.com. Keep up with her journey around the globe by following her on Instagram and subscribing to her YouTube channel.
Featured image by Getty Images
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Why We'll Probably Never Hear Lupita Nyong'o Share Her Relationship With The World
Lupita Nyong'o is sharing a transparent look into her life after a recent breakup.
In a cover story for NET-A-PORTER, the A Quiet Place: Day One star shed light on the significant heartbreak she experienced following the end of her relationship with ex-boyfriend and TV host, Selema Masekela.
As a public figure, Nyong'o, 39, sought to divulge the news of the breakup in hopes of presenting a more authentic perspective on the pain that follows a separation.
"I was living in a lot of pain and heartbreak," she told the publication. "I looked at the environment of my social media and thought I don’t want to be a part of this illusion that everything is always coming up roses. Surely there is a lesson for me to learn in this, and I just want to be real about it."
The Black Panther star went on to explain that her choice to be transparent with her fans about her breakup came from the certainty she felt after ending the relationship. “In my mind, when I shared my relationship status with the world, it was because I felt sure about it,” she said.
While she didn’t know how the news would land with her fans, she found relief in knowing she wasn’t alone in her experience.
“I knew how it could be interpreted; I knew it would have a life of its own,” she reflects. “But then I started to see the comments and people were being so loving and supportive. The ones that moved me the most were other people sharing their pain and their heartbreak.”
Nyong'o and Masekela went Instagram official in December 2022, publicly announcing their relationship in a couple's video. In October 2023, Nyong'o took to her personal Instagram account to share the news of her breakup in her caption, writing, "At this moment, it is necessary for me to share a personal truth and publicly dissociate myself from someone I can no longer trust.”
She continued the vulnerable note, "I find myself in a season of heartbreak because of a love suddenly and devastatingly extinguished by deception. I am tempted to run into the shadows and hide, only to return to the light when I have regained my strength enough for me to say, 'Whatever, my life is better this way.' But I am reminded that the magnitude of the pain I am feeling is equal to the measure of my capacity for love."
These days, Nyong'o tells NET-A-PORTER that she is prioritizing profound self-discovery that extends beyond her career. She notes having a deliberate and unhurried approach to understanding herself.
She also alludes to keeping her relationships private moving forward after noting it was "very, very sage" of her not to talk about her private life professionally in the days before her last relationship. "I'm going back to those days by the way," Nyong'o shares of her reinstated boundaries around her personal life.
Earlier this month, Nyong'o made headlines alongside her new boyfriend actor Joshua Jackson. Nyong'o and Jackson went through public splits from their respective SOs in October 2023, with the latter splitting from his long-time partner Jodie Turner-Smith following her divorce filing from the Dawson's Creek alum.
The pair have been spotted together as early as December 2023, but nothing screamed "couple" quite as loudly as their recent getaway to Mexico for Nyong'o's 41st birthday featuring passionate displays of affection.
"Our purpose in life is to love. And so you have to get back in it," she tells the outlet, seemingly alluding to her budding new romance.
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Featured image by Taylor Hill/Getty Images