I Took My First Solo Trip To Tulum, Mexico
For my 31st birthday, I knew I wanted to take my very first solo trip. Taking an international trip by myself was something that I wanted to do for years, and I finally decided to make this goal become my reality. Tulum, Mexico has been on my travel radar for a couple of years, so I was ecstatic that I could finally visit this gorgeous city!
Tulum can be described as a peaceful, picturesque, relaxing, and rejuvenating city that offers amazing food and drinks, natural and holistic healing, some of the friendliest citizens ever, and a number of Instagram-worthy places to take photos! It is located about two hours away from Cancun in the state of Quintana Roo and is home to some of the most amazingly beautiful beaches the world has to offer. In recent years, Tulum has gained popularity.
When visiting Tulum, you should know:
Getting There
Image via Sylvia Pettway
Since Tulum does not have an airport, you must fly in through Cancun International. From there, you can rent a car, use a private or shared transportation service, or do what I did and ride on the ADO bus, the cheapest option. The ADO buses are public charter buses that citizens and tourists use to travel to different cities along the Riviera Mayan coast. The buses are affordable to ride and super comfortable. Some of them even come with Wifi!
Once I exited the airport, I found the ADO stand and paid for my ticket using pesos. (Please use pesos instead of your currency when buying your ticket because you will get your change back in pesos, and it may be less than what you expect). When using the ADO bus, you can either purchase a ticket where the bus goes straight to Tulum or you can purchase a ticket where you will arrive in Playa del Carmen from the airport and transfer to another bus. (You can read more about the transportation options here.)
Money, Communication, and...the Plug
Their currency is the Mexican Peso, but some places accept credit cards. It is best for you to bring pesos to use. You either order your currency through your local bank or visit the Santander Bank in Tulum to exchange your currency. Avoid exchanging your currency at the Cancun International Airport, because the exchange rates are a lot higher than the above-mentioned options.
Most of the citizens speak Spanish, but I came across a few men and women who were either bilingual or understood me and could help me if I had any questions. With that being said, brush up on your Spanish! Even if you only know or learn basic Spanish greetings, it goes a long way in Tulum. The citizens appreciate it and it will help you learn and respect their culture even more. If all else fails, Google Translate is your friend!
For my fellow Americans, there is no need to buy a universal plug as Tulum has both plug type A and plug type B for all your electronic needs.
Image via Sylvia Pettway
Skincare Is a Must
Bring sunscreen and bug repellent. You're going to need them both. In order to accommodate Tulum's eco-friendly living and to protect the animals, try to use biodegradable skin products, especially when visiting the cenotes. I used these products: Neutrogena Sheer Zinc Sunscreen and OFF Botanicals Insect Repellent.
Research your hotel accommodations. Staying in town is cheaper than staying on the beach, but it is all about your preference and your budget. I stayed in town on this trip, but when I visit again, I plan to do a couple of days on the beach and a couple of days in town.
Hot Spots for Lodging
Image via Sylvia Pettway
For my solo trip, I knew I wanted my accommodations to be close to the center of Tulum where mostly everything was within walking distance. I'm so glad that I was blessed to find Villas Geminis Boutique Condo Hotel as it absolutely exceeded my expectations! Each room is named and reflected after a famous artist. I stayed in the 'Gustav Klimt' room which came with a complete kitchenette area, a king-sized bed, a sofa bed, shower, and a very big and deep outdoor tub with another overhead shower.
The staff at Villas Geminis was very welcoming and accommodating to my needs, and they went above and beyond to help me to navigate the area with ease. A stay at this fabulous and very affordable hotel also comes with an outdoor pool (which I had all to myself each day), breakfast at no additional charge, and free bicycle rentals to use for touring the beautiful city. Villas Geminis have booklets inside of each room that describes the additional services they provide as well as restaurants, bars, attractions, and tours that helped me to experience one of the best hotel stays ever!
Best Eats
Image via Sylvia Pettway
La Malquerita was the first restaurant that I visited in Tulum. The restaurant has two menus--one with Mexican dishes and one with Italian dishes! The food and drinks at this restaurant are not only appetizing but super affordable. Like many other restaurants in the Tulum city center, they offer happy hour specials on their drinks (which were quite strong and tasty). The total cost of my first meal was $11.50--including two drinks! The restaurant also has a dining area inside that has swings instead of chairs. The quesadilla plate was really delicious, but the tacos needed a bit more flavor. Nevertheless, it was definitely worth visiting, even if you simply want to take advantage of their two-for-one drink specials.
Image via Sylvia Pettway
Burrito Amor is one of the top restaurants to visit in Tulum. This is one of those restaurants that you have try or your visit to Tulum won't be complete. The establishment has a variety of options, including vegetarian and vegan, to please the burrito-lover in you! The burritos are wrapped in banana leaves and served with a variety of sauces to appeal to your preferred level of spice! I got the vegetarian burrito with a margarita, of course, and the meal was fantastic! It's a busy restaurant, so if you want to beat the crowd, get there once they open. F.Y.I., they serve breakfast, too!
Listen to me...if you desire an authentic street taco with the most flavorful meats you've ever tasted in your life? Please, please, please make sure you visit Antojito La Chiapaneca. I've never had tacos that tasted so good. You know the food is good when you forget to take a picture of the meal (le sigh). I had a chicken and a steak taco, and they were both amazing! The restaurant is famous for their tacos de carnitas, or pork tacos, where they shave the cooked pieces of pork in front you and prepare it for you!
More Than Tacos
Image via Sylvia Pettway
Anyone who knows me knows I love a good, juicy, flavorful burger, and hot, crispy, well-seasoned fries. I needed my burger fix while I was in Tulum, so I researched some places and came across Bonita Tulum Burger Bar and it definitely exceeded my expectations! It was one of the best burgers that I've had in a while---huge, fresh, and perfectly seasoned. Along with the standard condiments, Bonita offers a cream cheese spread that was heavenly. I used that instead of ketchup to dip my fries in! Like the other above-mentioned restaurants, Bonita is affordably priced and offers vegan and vegetarian options.
Image via Sylvia Pettway
I have a huge sweet tooth, so I was glad that I came across Campanella Cremerie, a shop that sells a selection of gelato flavors and other sugary sweet treats. The staff members were very friendly and the gelato was extremely tasty! Try the hazelnut flavor and thank me later. I ended up visiting this place twice and was satisfied each time.
Batey is a very popular bar located in Tulum Centero that is known for its mojitos. What makes these particular drinks so special is that they are made using fresh sugar cane juice! I had the watermelon mojito and it was pretty good!
Life's a Beach
Tulum is known for its amazingly beautiful beaches, and there are a variety of them to enjoy. Each day I visited the beaches, the weather was gorgeous, the temperature was perfect, and the water felt amazing! The most popular beaches in Tulum include Playa Paraiso, Playa Ruinas (which surrounds the Tulum Mayan Ruins), and Las Palmas Public Beach.
Image via Sylvia Pettway
There are beach chairs and cabanas for a fee so that you can lie back and enjoy the serenity that the beaches have to offer. I didn't get the opportunity to visit some of the other attractions that Tulum is famously known for, but I have added them for future reference. Click on each one for more info:
- Dos Ojos And Grand Cenotes
- Tulum Mayan Ruins
- A Reiki Massage Spa Center
- Casa Malca (formerly known as Pablo Escobar's mansion
- Gitano Restaurant
- Farm to Table Restaurant
- CoCoTulum Hotel
I have already decided that I will be going back to Tulum again for my birthday this year, and I can't wait to relive these experiences and make new ones in this magical city! Where would you like to go for your first solo trip?
Article originally published on Living SILsationally
Featured Image by Shutterstock
Originally published March 10, 2020
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LISTÂ HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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How To Tell If You're Disciplining Your Child Or Seeking Revenge
When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:Â Â
​Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
​Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
​Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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Featured image by Courtney Hale/Getty Images