Tracee Ellis Ross Talks Giving Our Bodies Compassion & We Should All Lean Into Her Message
Our obsession with picture-perfect bodies ages over decades. Truth be told: we have always equated self-worth with size. As for me and my house, I have never felt comfortable in my body and as the lockdown went on and on, I found myself longing for the body I had in years past. Even then, I thought I was fat. I realized in those moments that my lifetime relationship with my body was toxic.
Not to mention, all the memes in 2020 about quarantine weight. From the quarantine 15 to eating your month's worth of favorite snacks in one day, the innanets had us all feeling guilty for living and adapting to our new normal. As much as we wanted our unusual standards to disappear once 2021 arrived, that's not what transpired. It high key feels like we are basically in an extended version of 2020 with all that is happening in the world.
Our favorite auntie and all-around icon, Tracee Ellis Ross, reminded us of this when she recently posted a video recounting all that we have endured since the beginning of the lockdown. More importantly, she discusses her own struggles with her body and how she had to adjust her expectations while extending grace.
"I don't know about you guys, but after the insanity of the year that we have been through, over a year now that is, you know, it's still creeping along, I didn't like transform my body, exercise like a crazy woman and turn into a vegan. And, and as a result, you know, my body feels different.
"I sat more than I'm used to. I didn't do the same amount of cardio. I wasn't in the gym because of the circumstances of what we were all living in and are all living in. There was like this funnel that was like funneling joy into very small spaces."
The Black-ish star continues to say that joy is a major part of well-being and humanity. It's what makes us feel good. It sparks spontaneity and connection and those beautiful feelings were instantly funneled into our little individual spaces. We totally agreed with Tracee when she professed that most of the things that were in that little funnel were food and drinks because it brought us solace and comfort. The moment she started judging herself for making certain choices, she started asking, "What am I doing?" Which reminded her of a friend who had a contentious relationship with her body after having her first child and decided to write her body a "thank you" note.
"I realized that the softness that I'm experiencing in my body, a little bit of extra weight--all of us have our own version of that--is actually something to say, thank you for that. The softness that my body has been incredibly wise--that thank you for keeping me safe during COVID or if I was a body that got COVID keeping me healthy through and fighting through a virus--that with all the sharpness and harshness and violence and fear that has been around that perhaps the softness of my body is a blessing that it has been able to nurture me in a way that my mind could not...
"I really encourage and invite all of us to just receive the wisdom of our bodies right now and allow the softness, the weight--whatever that looks like and be grateful. Like, I feel like I've made it through this year. And in some ways I've gotten deeper. In some ways I've gotten bigger in some ways. I am forever changed in some ways... I don't think that my physical body is the most important thing to come out of this very difficult time... I think it is--this is a time for us to offer compassion everywhere to our bodies and to each other."
What a powerful, healthy way to reconnect with our bodies. I remember when I started therapy, one of the topics I was the most uncomfortable broaching was my relationship with my body. My therapist told me that one way to reconnect with parts of me that I don't love is by talking to those very parts. Y'all know I looked at her like she was crazy, right? What do I look like caressing my belly and talking to it? It's safe to say I told my therapist I would think about it.
Two days later, I was scrolling on Instagram and saw Lizzo caressing and talking to her belly.
She said in her caption:
"I started talking to my belly this year. Blowing her kisses and showering her with praises. I used to want to cut my stomach off, I hated it so much. But it's literally ME. I am learning to radically love every part of myself. Even if it means talking to myself every morning."
Both women serve as powerful reminders to love yourself, your whole self. But especially the parts of us that our hardest to love.
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Featured image via Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
Joce Blake is a womanist who loves fashion, Beyonce and Hot Cheetos. The sophistiratchet enthusiast is based in Brooklyn, NY but has southern belle roots as she was born and raised in Memphis, TN. Keep up with her on Instagram @joce_blake and on Twitter @SaraJessicaBee.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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I Tried Beyoncé's Haircare Line CÉCRED & Here's My Honest Review
Beyoncé is snatching our wallets yet again with her latest business venture CÉCRED. In 2023, the Texas native hinted at a potential haircare line when she posted this photo causing fans to speculate that her next project would be focused on her famous tresses - they were right. Her haircare line Cécred launched on February 20 with her first drop called The Foundation Collection which focuses on haircare first, and I can only assume that a style product line for colored-treated hair will likely follow since Beyoncé is known for slaying various shades of blonde.
As a super fan since the early 2000s, it was only right that I give an honest review of the full line and purchase the Super Fan Bundle (retailed at $265) which includes the full product line of the 8 products, as well as a branded cosmetic bag. If you’re thinking, “Girl that bundle is too pricey for me,” I can assure you that for the value you're getting, the price is quite reasonable. This bundle was an intentional and marketable way to allow consumers to experience every Cécred product.
The brand messaging surrounding Cécred has been salon-inspired, and rightfully so as an ode to Beyoncé’s upbringing growing up in her mother’s hair salon in Houston. This line is backed by science and licensed cosmetologists showing that she’s done her research and appointed the experts. Cécred's IG feed has been filled with images and videos inside of hair salons including some videos of Ms. Tina herself assisting in the styling of beauty experts who visited Cécred's private salon to have the VIP treatment!
Now, have I seen influencers, consumers, and beauty stylists using the Foundation Collection at home? Yes, but I thought it was best to experience Cécred with my go-to cosmetologist who also happens to be my Auntie Tawana. She has been my educator and go-to for hair knowledge since I was a child and has had a hand in my mom's hair health which has always been goals for me. As a little girl, my Saturdays were spent sitting in her hair salon while my mama got her hair done as I patiently waited reading Jet and ESSENCE, ever so carefully eavesdropping on the conversations of the ladies who were coming for much more than just a beauty routine, but an experience.
I’d fall asleep on the plush couch in the waiting area flipping through magazines while listening to the sultry sounds of Maxwell. And I had my first lesson in breakup empowerment when I heard Sunshine Anderson’s “Heard It All Before.” So there was no other place for me to go than to see her, and because I’m her niece, I was able to visit her private salon in her home that she calls The After Hours where upon arrival I was greeted with my favorite Black-owned sparkling Rosé, candles lit, and my aunt’s breakdown of Cécred.
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
But let me refocus and share my salon experience as I tried Cécred for the first time.
If You’re Wondering…Who is Cécred For?
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
When news of Beyoncé potentially launching a beauty brand hit the internet, there were a bunch of predictions of what and who the line would be marketed towards and if she’d have any wig care products as she’s known for slaying her units! But she went in a totally different direction which I love, and I’m going to tell you why. Critics have questioned if Beyoncé should be venturing into the haircare industry because she is often seen in weaves and wigs, but true Beyoncé fans know that she has healthy hair and that, like many Black women, experiments with various styles.
Cécred was created for all hair types and textures, including straight to coily, virgin, color-treated, chemically processed, and heat-styled. As a Black woman who has worn wigs, had chemically processed hair, heat-styled, natural, and color-treated hair, let me tell you, this was no easy feat! The amount of money I’ve spent on my hair through its various changes just on product alone, forget styling has been astronomical.
Cécred is serving the needs of various hair types in textures and I truly believe that this is going to make Beyoncé a true competitor in the hair industry amongst brands that are comparable such as OUAI and Olaplex. Both competitor brands have similar items at a higher price point and unlike Cécred, their products and brand messaging haven’t always felt inclusive to Black women and other hair types.
Cécred has been tested inclusively and the reviews from various hair types and backgrounds of consumers are allowing the brand to stand out.
I Tried Beyoncé's Haircare Line Cécred: My Honest Review
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
My hair has never felt cleaner and it shined for well over a week following the styling (but the oil should be used sparingly if like me, oil can weigh down your hair.) Immediately when my hair touched the sink, my aunt told me that she saw all the dirt and oils lifting from my hair when she applied the clarifying shampoo. As a girl who loves my curls, I am often judgy when I use any other shampoo and conditioner aside from Pattern, but not this time.
When my aunt guided my hands across my hair, she showed me how my curls weren’t tangled, and how she didn’t need to comb out my curls before applying the moisturizing deep conditioner or the deconstructing treatment mask.
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
She applied each step with care and walked me through the process, and to my surprise, the hair mask wasn’t thick - but through trial and error as a natural girl, I’ve learned that a thick mask doesn’t always equal what’s best for your hair. She styled me with a silk press that left my hair with shine and I can honestly say that each step of the line is needed especially if you are someone who changes up your hair and deals with breakage. If your hair is healthy, you can opt out of the reconstructing treatment mask but I recommend taking the product line to your salon, having a discussion with your stylist on where your hair health needs improvement, and then purchasing based on that.
We know ourselves better than anyone else, but your stylist knows your hair better than you do. I like to lead with their knowledge first and then incorporate what my hair goals are. If you’re a girly who’s committed to hair health and has either the discipline to incorporate each step at home or can bring your products to the salon, Cécred is for you no matter if you’re a silk press or a wash-and-go naturalist.
Give Cécred a try, I’ll be using the line for my hair appointments until it runs out and if I see long-term results, it will be added to the beauty regimen indefinitely.
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Featured image courtesy of CÉCRED