Model Nikia Phoenix: "Being A Freckled Face, Natural Haired Girl Isn't Easy"

The first thing that draws me in about 35-year-old model and content creator extraordinaire Nikia Phoenix is the striking way freckles paint her face.
Her unconventional beauty, no doubt, is the thing that grabs you first, but it's the quirks and fearlessness of her bold personality that echo enough within to make you stay. I could be biased though. I have been an avid reader of her blog, Model Liberation, for years. She talks style, beauty, hair, advice, and of course model life, and in a way that was very much “no bullshit". She gives it to you straight, no chaser, and it makes her beauty resonate with me more. It's so much more than what you see on the surface, it's skin deep.
“Being a freckled face, natural haired girl isn't easy. I've always felt different," she's said of herself, “Because of faith, I've been able to embrace who I am and prosper."
Phoenix had humble beginnings as a graduate of University of South Carolina, whose first job post-grad was that of a television news producer. She's always valued education and learning as a life long process. Somehow a chance meeting with Greg Alterman of Alternative Apparel led her to venturing off into modeling, which led to commercials, campaigns, and billboards. This, of course, brought about the fruition of her blog Model Liberation, which no doubt gave her the motivation to take her content creation to a new level with her work as Managing Editor for the women's lifestyle brand, Simone Digital and the revamp of her official site, Nikia Phoenix.
On one fine day, she was able to give it to me straight. We talked the modeling industry, self confidence, and what motivates her as a young creative.
On her first taste of modeling:
In the 90s, there were always these model searches held at malls that me and my friends would go to and try out for because we lived in a small town and had nothing else to do. Strangely enough, I always got picked for those. My mom was always like, “no, no, no, not gonna happen." Finally, one time she said it was okay because it was for a modeling school. Because it was just for a modeling school, it seemed so superficial to me, so I decided to go for the acting portion. I knew I wanted to pursue journalism in school and needed some time in front of the camera speaking, so what better way to get the best of both worlds? I did that. I had agencies in Atlanta interested in repping me and the plan was to do that part time while taking classes at Georgia State. I think that scared my mother because it ultimately ended up being a “no" so I had to walk away from it. At that point, I was like, okay well that's not supposed to happen.
On the jumpstart of her career as a working model:
I took the traditional route, went to college, got out of college, and got a job. That didn't really work out, so I went to L.A. While in L.A., I was in a coffee shop and got discovered by the owner of Alternative Apparel. It was funny because we were having this long conversation about community fashion and design. At the time I had reenrolled in school for fashion design. And you know how it is when you go to get coffee in the morning – if you have a scarf on your head you don't care. I had a hat pulled halfway down my face, but from that, he was like, “I want you to be in my campaign." (laughs) I was like, alright! When I went to see it was a legit set, it was a legit shoot. From then on, I took it seriously. This is what I'm supposed to do because modeling was something that kept coming up in my life, so this was what I'm supposed to be doing.
On the conflicts of being dubbed the “edgy girl" in her industry:
Even after having a major campaign running and other campaigns going, I still couldn't get representation. It was very difficult because they kept saying that I was this “edgy" girl – they kept giving me excuses for why I couldn't [model]. I felt like, 'Don't you see that I'm still here because I can?' Even now, I can walk into an agency and probably hear similar things. I've been doing this for 11 years, I'm obviously still good for it. When this dream of mine started in the 90s, that's when models were allowed to be “different". That is when unique beauty was embraced. Stacey McKenzie was the first black model that I really saw landing major campaigns. I was like, oh snap! If she can do it, I'm good, I'm good! (laughs). Then the industry started to change where they wanted more cookie cutter models that looked all the same. I was dubbed the not-so-PC term “exotic". There's nothing exotic about me, I don't know what you're talking about. I'd hear exotic or “edgy". I know I can give a mean side-eye, but I'm approachable (laughs).
On using the modeling industry's obsession with youth to her advantage:
I'm actually glad that my big break was when I was 25. That's the age most models retire, but that was when I got my first foot in the door professionally. I couldn't walk into agencies and be honest about my age. They'd assume that I was washed up if I told them my real age. What I'd like to say is first of all, black don't crack (laughs). I'm glad that I did start when I was 25 because by then, I was coming into my own as a woman and knew what I would and would not do. I knew that I wouldn't stand for a “no". If I was 16 and someone told me “no", I'd probably cry in a corner and be miserable for the rest of my life. When you're 25 and someone tells you “no," you're like really? Watch. So imagine now being 35 when people tell me “no" (laughs).
On her journey to self acceptance through self love:
There are moments when I don't feel beautiful – there are moments when we all don't feel beautiful. We're so critical of ourselves and we nitpick everything. We stand in front of the mirror and find the tiniest little blemish and fixate on it. And I have a lot of them (laughs). I was in a coffee shop the other day and this lady comes up, she's standing beside me, and she has her baby with her. This little boy was staring at me – not looking at all – just staring, like, what in the world? I am assuming he never sees black people with freckles (laughs). When that used to happen, I used to get offended. In the same moment that there was a kid staring at me like I'm from another planet, this woman comes up to me asking if she can take my picture and information because she has a friend that might be interested in using me for a campaign. There's God saying stop looking at things negatively, let me throw you a bone really quick.
On what turns her on:

Oh my goodness, am I going to kiss-and-tell? I love a man who anticipates my needs and makes me feel like we are the only two people who exist in that moment. He is my king and I am his queen and with every touch he reaffirms that union. There's no room for selfishness in our universe. I am not attracted to cockiness and I certainly don't want a man who is timid either. If I'm not afraid to let go, he shouldn't be either. Put in work and we'll get each other high.
On when she feels sexiest:
I am loved, confident, and I know who I am. It's not about comparing myself to anyone else or trying to play someone else's game. The ball is in my court. Feeling sexy has so much to do with being appreciated and knowing your value. I've come to realize that I don't necessarily have to seek that approval from the opposite sex. It's within me, I only have to believe it.
On her love of social media:
I love social media and the fact that it allows us to see that yes we're very different but we have so many similarities. Outside of my own family, it took a very long time for me to find other black people who had freckles. When you talk to other black people who have freckles, they say the same thing, “People picked on me", “People said black people don't have freckles", this that and the other. There's strength in knowing that we've all been through it and that we're all still here. I look just like my mom and when my mom and I talked about accepting who we are, she says that I helped her accept who she is because she would see the same struggles that she had with acceptance coming up in me and my sister. In order to be able to tell us how to deal with it, she had to be able to deal with her own issues.
On what she doesn't like about social media:
I read through comments on Instagram and sometimes those comments are not very nice. People love the internet because they can be somewhat anonymous. They aren't going to get approached on the street for the bullshit that they put online. I let it roll off of my back, but I might also say to that person that I am a human being, not an inanimate object. You might not think I'm beautiful, that's your opinion, but I think that I am beautiful. But like my grandmother says, “If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."
On L.A living:
L.A. has its moments. I love this place, but I also don't love this place. I feel like there's not room for growth. You hit a glass ceiling and I am sure everyone feels like that in the places they live. In L.A., you either have it or you don't – there's not much room for in between. Sometimes I feel like I'm sitting on top of the world, but when you go for months without booking jobs or you still live in an apartment where you have a roommate, you're kind of like, okay, I'm not where I want to be yet. So then I think, relocating could be the answer. It's a gamble. It's definitely a gamble. It's not like those 90s sitcoms you watched (laughs). There's not a whole lot of people of color here. That's a smidge of my reality.
On her creative entrepreneurial endeavors:
Last year, I started writing down all of the things I wanted to do and I called it my "Oprah Plan." I asked myself, why isn't there a black equivalent of Jessica Alba with her Honest company? Why isn't there a black equivalent of Martha Stewart? I said, let me just do it. When you think about the apps that are doing well or the businesses that are doing well, they don't own a storefront. They don't keep products in house, they source you out to over sites that do. You go to them for everything. Why can't I own a marketplace for black businesses to do the same thing? I am working on that with my business partner. Also, being so involved with the beauty business, I am tired of hearing black women go through so many difficulties with finding products that work for them. I am working on a beauty shopping experience where I bring the products to them called Black Girl Beautiful, starting in L.A. with plans to bridge the gap in Atlanta later. In Atlanta, I hope to pull our resources together and understand that there is power in the village and create a networking event called Crème de le Crème where black creatives can come together and create for ourselves by ourselves. I also have a secret dinner club series in the works called Nikia Phoenix presents: Supper. That's just a little taste.
On doing things that ignite her soul:
This is a really exciting time not only for me, but all of us. I am becoming who I am meant to be. Modeling and blogging - It's all evolved into this... what I'm working on now. Are you living your dream or someone else's? That's real talk. I want women to know the power we control and the clout we possess. I want other creatives to understand that every no is an opportunity for a bigger yes. Through various passion projects, I am creating content dedicated to helping you believe in yourself. It's more than group therapy, it's legit motivation. If you're going to talk it, be about it... so let's go for it.
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This Is How To Keep 'Holiday Season Stress' From Infecting Your Relationship
Hmph. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like there is something really weird happening in the fall season air (because winter doesn’t officially begin until December 21) that cuddle season is in full swing while break-up season is as well. In fact, did you know that break-ups are so popular during the holiday season that December 11 is deemed Break-Up Day?
The reasons why relationships shift around this time vary; however, I did both roll my eyes and chuckle when I read that a very popular one is because it’s an easy way to get out of getting one’s significant other a Christmas present. SMDH.
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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Skincare Hacks That Actually Make Hyperpigmentation...Worse
Something that I wish I had learned back when I was experiencing more breakouts than I do at this point in my life is the difference between hyperpigmentation and actual acne scars. Although people oftentimes believe that they are one in the same, that actually isn’t the case.
Yes, both can result in darker marks on your skin; however, while hyperpigmentation can change the color of it, scars often also alter your skin’s texture. And yes, it’s important to know the difference between the two because, that way, you know how to treat each issue.
Since the focus today is on hyperpigmentation, let me break that down a bit further. Basically, what gives your skin pigment is melanin. Well, when your skin cells end up getting damaged or injured, oftentimes your body’s response is to create more melanin as a part of the healing process. Problem is, sometimes your system overproduces melanin, and that can lead to darker patches of skin. This can especially be the case for our skin since we naturally produce more melanin anyway.
When hyperpigmentation transpires, we usually want to get rid of it as soon as possible. And while doing things like applying sunscreen, using skin lightening products, and even taking certain vitamins can help — the main thing to do is incorporate a gentle skincare regimen and then use patience with it. If you don’t and you go overboard in your approach, you could look up and end up with hyperpigmentation issues that are far worse (and longer lasting) than they were to begin with.
How? I’ll explain.
Using Products That Create Breakouts
GiphyWho likes getting a pimple? For me, though, what pisses me off to no end is that there is about a 70 percent chance that if one pops up, some sort of hyperpigmentation is going to be left behind whether I mess with it or not. Ugh. The reason why is because zits bring inflammation and inflammation can trigger hyperpigmentation.
So, you know what that means, right? It’s important to do all that you can to avoid getting a pimple in the first place and that includes not using products that will clog up your pores or irritate your skin like lanolin, thick butters (especially on your face), mineral oil, D&C coloring, a fatty acid called isopropyl palmitate — these are a few things that can lead to breakouts, if you’re not careful. That’s why it’s always a good idea to read the labels of the things before purchasing them.
Oh, and when it comes to things like shea and mango butter, it’s usually best to use them on other parts of your body than your face (because your face is more fragile than, say, your arms or legs).
Doing Too Much Exfoliating
GiphyI am a fan of DIY chemical peels; so much so that I wrote an entire article about it a couple of years ago (check out “I've Been Doing At-Home Chemical Peels. Here Are The Pros And Cons.”). The things that I like most about them are they are a super-effective way to exfoliate and even out my skin tone. That said, though, be careful with doing too much exfoliating whether it’s via a chemical peel, a skin scrub or even dry brushing.
Not only can over-exfoliating irritate your skin, it can dry it out, cause lots of skin flakes, lead to inflamed skin — and all of this can result in hyperpigmentation as your skin is in the process of “getting back to normal.” So, just how often should you exfoliate? Unless your skin is really oily, 1-2 times a week is more than enough (2-3 if it is on the oily side).
Layering with Too Many Products
GiphyOh, I know — if you watch too many of those TikTok and Instagram videos where women are applying 6-10 products on their face before adding any make-up to it, it can tempt you to follow suit. Use some caution with that, though. Each skincare product comes with its own list of ingredients and every time you add something else that has another set of ingredients onto it, that increases the chances of you irritating your skin or causing it to break out.
My two cents would be to ease into each product. Start with one thing and, if it’s all good (after about a week or so), incorporate another. Oh, and try to keep it down to 3-5 skincare products tops. When it comes to effective skin routines “less is more” is a motto to live by. Otherwise, redness, flaking and hyperpigmentation may be in your future.
Using Skincare Products That Contain Fragrance
GiphyAlthough applying skincare products that have a nice scent to them can cause your skin to smell amazing, sometimes they can be both an irritant as well as an allergen — and that can cause your skin’s barrier to weaken or become really irritated. And again, whenever your skin is damaged in some way, the recovery process can lead to hyperpigmentation. So, it really is best to avoid scented skin products at all costs (if you want flawless skin, that is).
Applying Too Much Heat
GiphyBet you didn’t see this one coming. How about increased blood flow, over time, can lead to hyperpigmentation. Basically, it’s because of the fact that, sometimes, too much consistent blood flow can result in skin inflammation and, as we already discussed, when the body is healing from inflammation, that can sometimes cause hyperpigmentation to occur.
The takeaway here: use sunscreen when you’re outdoors and try to keep those scorching hot showers to a minimum. Being in warm water for between 7-10 minutes is ideal.
Not Testing Products (Especially Acids) on Your Arm First
GiphySomething that definitely keeps my skin glowing is certain acids: hyaluronic acid, mandelic acid and kojic acid soap (oh and some vitamin C extract too), especially. All of these are pretty good on darker skin tones; however, because we all are different, before applying any acid to your skin, make sure to test it on your arm first (and wait 48 hours, just to be sure that the coast is clear).
Trust me, I know of what I speak because I once tried some pretty potent pineapple extract on my face once and it mildly burned the lower part of my right cheek to the point where it took about four months before everything turned back to normal. Hmph, if I can keep anyone from experiencing that drama, I absolutely will.
7. Experimenting with Harsh Essential Oils
GiphyListen, if you want a zit to go away, damn near overnight, apply some tea tree oil to it. Just make sure that you dilute it with a light carrier oil (like grapeseed, jojoba or rosehip oil) first. Why? Oh, I have learned from very up close and personal experience that certain essential oils can also burn your skin and, as we’ve already discussed, ad nauseum at this point, damaged skin typically results in hyperpigmentation on some level. Yeah, essential oils are a blessing. They are also nothing to play with. Dilute, dilute, DILUTE.
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You know, they say that it can take several weeks, if not many months, for hyperpigmentation to totally fade away. Hmph. To me, that’s even more incentive to do all that you can to avoid it transpiring in the first place — and that includes NOT incorporating counterproductive skincare routines and regimens.
The more you know, sis. For real.
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