Gina Prince-Bythewood On 'The Old Guard' & Creating Space For Black Women In Hollywood

Since commanding our attention with Love & Basketball 20 years ago, Gina Prince-Bythewood has been laser-focused on creating space for Black women in Hollywood. That mission doesn't change now that she has made history with Netflix's latest action film, The Old Guard.
As grand as this moment is, Gina isn't impressed by the fact that she is the first Black woman to direct a major comic-book film. She questions why it took all this time instead. "I hate that we're still having firsts in 2020," she tells xoNecole. "It's like, at what point does it stop?"

The Old Guard, which zooms in on an intimate camp of immortal mercenaries, isn't a mere win for Gina. In her eyes, it's a chance to ensure that Black women both in front of and behind the camera are no longer denied the shot to display the full scope of their talent. "I had a no-fail policy because I know how Hollywood works," she stresses. "There's such a spotlight on the few of us here that we have to succeed because in our success, others will get the opportunity."
In this xoChat, Gina reflects on cementing her name with Love & Basketball, overcoming rejection in Hollywood, and making room for KiKi Layne to shine in The Old Guard.
xoNecole: This year, you celebrated 20 years of 'Love & Basketball'. How has it been taking in how deep of a mark your first feature film has made?
Gina Prince-Bythewood: It really is amazing. It never gets old to hear that people dig the film. It's surreal that a film that was so hard to get made, that was such an incredible fight, that was such a personal story, has had longevity and that people still share it with family and friends after all this time. As an artist, that's what you dream about, of having your work sustain itself and affect people, so I'm blown away by it. It inspires me to keep doing what I'm doing.

Aimee Spinks/NETFLIX
What lesson from those early moments in your career do you keep close to the heart?
Overcome "no". That's the biggest thing. You only need one "yes".
When considering obstacles you’ve faced on your path, what keeps you from being jaded two decades into your career?
I'm acutely aware of the things that Hollywood has done wrong [and] how they're complicit in what is happening right now during this national reckoning, but what keeps me in this is I love to tell stories, I love what I do, and I know how important TV and film can be in shaping perception and changing culture. That sustains me. I only do things that I'm passionate about, and there are so many stories I want to tell, so there's always that excitement for me to get this into the world. The thing that creeps in every once in a while is knowing how hard it is to get some of these stories out there, but because I'm so passionate about it and know the game after 20 years and know that at some point somebody is going to say "yes", that absolutely keeps me going.
"I'm acutely aware of the things that Hollywood has done wrong [and] how they're complicit in what is happening right now during this national reckoning, but what keeps me in this is I love to tell stories, I love what I do, and I know how important TV and film can be in shaping perception and changing culture. That sustains me."

Aimee Spinks/NETFLIX
Thinking about the power that TV and film has, what on screen impacted you the most, especially when you think about why you decided to become a filmmaker in the first place?
There were two moments. When I was younger, I remember my family used to always sit down and watch M*A*S*H [together]. Then, one day I happened to turn the channel and Diff'rent Strokes was on, and it was the first time I felt like I saw myself reflected in this box, and I just became obsessed with it. Then in high school, when I was 17, I went to the movies and a trailer came up for She's Gotta Have It, and I got that same jolt of seeing a Black woman up there, and it affected me deeply. I wanted to give us that same jolt and give us the opportunity to see ourselves in ways that we can be inspired by.
With 'The Old Guard', you’ve become the first Black woman to direct a major comic-book film. How do you feel about that?
I hate that we're still having firsts in 2020. It's like, at what point does it stop? But, I'm proud of the fact that I got this opportunity to do it. I certainly worked hard to get it, and once I got it, I had a no-fail policy because I know how Hollywood works. There's such a spotlight on the few of us here that we have to succeed because in our success, others will get the opportunity. I carried that with me every day. That pressure fueled me as opposed to making me run away from it. I know that there are so many dope sisters out there that are as capable and eager to do the same thing, so I'm looking forward to them getting the shot.
"There's such a spotlight on the few of us here that we have to succeed because in our success, others will get the opportunity. I carried that with me every day. That pressure fueled me as opposed to making me run away from it. I know that there are so many dope sisters out there that are as capable and eager to do the same thing, so I'm looking forward to them getting the shot."

Aimee Spinks/NETFLIX
'The Old Guard' is an adaptation of the Greg Rucka comic book of the same name. What was it about this story that you gravitated to the most?
The [part I gravitated to] most was the fact that one of the old guards is a young, Black female hero. I was like, "Yeah, I need to put this in the world." I dug that she was naturally a warrior. There was such a normalcy to that. There wasn't some traumatic event that happened to her that forced her to find her strength. She was a Marine. She had it in her. It was innate in her. I love that narrative, and I love that it was two women at the forefront of the story with that same warrior mentality that I think that we all have, but we haven't always been given the encouragement to tap into. I also really dug the story. I liked what it had to say about finding your purpose and the importance of that, which was something very personal to me, and I felt the audience could connect with that despite the fantastical premise. I love that it was about the tragedy of immortality as opposed to the aspirational aspects. Prior to this movie, I used to think, I wish I could live forever. You think about the courage that would give you if you knew you couldn't die, but in doing this [film], you understand what that really means.
In our recent chat with KiKi Layne, she commended you for not allowing the action in the film to overpower the heart of the characters. Why was this so important to you?
What I love about the genre is the direction that it's really been going in the last couple of years where they feel more like action-dramas. That's what I love. I want to be able to care about the characters and not just watch action. If you don't care about the characters, if they're not furthering the story, then it gets monotonous to me. What I wanted to bring to this film was story first and character first, so that you, as an audience, are invested in and care about these people that you're spending two hours with.
You’ve dedicated your career to creating space for Black women to live on screen. What do you hope viewers take away from KiKi’s embodiment of Nile?
KiKi rocked it. I really want us to be able to look up on screen and see ourselves in a way that's inspiring. The best moment of this process was when we had an audience screening, and this sister, 22-years-old, commented that she wished she had Nile when she was 12-years-old. That was so dope to me. If we can see it for ourselves, we can start to live in that type of truth. The thing that makes Nile so badass is not just her strength and her swagger and her courage, but also her empathy and her vulnerability. I think that Nile and KiKi really embody all of that, and I think that she is definitely someone that we can aspire to be.
"If we can see it for ourselves, we can start to live in that type of truth. The thing that makes Nile so badass is not just her strength and her swagger and her courage, but also her empathy and her vulnerability. I think that Nile and KiKi really embody all of that, and I think that she is definitely someone that we can aspire to be."

Aimee Spinks/NETFLIX
With one superhero film down, where do you go from here?
As soon as I finished [The Old Guard], I was exhausted. It's a lot to shoot a film like this. I just kept thinking that I can't wait to get to another movie in my head that I want to write that's smaller and more personal. I was going to take six months off and just relax and write and shoot that, and then this script came to me that's just so dope. It's going to be announced very shortly. It just felt like everything I've done in my career, including The Old Guard, put me in a position to be able to make this film for us, so that little movie that's still in my head is going to have to wait another two years (laughs).
For more of Gina, follow her on Instagram. The Old Guard is now streaming on Netflix.
Featured image by Getty Images
The Real Reason You Overthink And Crave Reassurance In Love
Over 40 million Americans have an anxiety disorder. However, what if I told you that everyone on the planet experiences situational anxiety - feelings of anxiousness when exposed to certain situations - and this isn't a diagnosis but rather a part of everyday life?
Given the prevalence of anxiety, it's quite possible that symptoms of anxiety will arise not just during the dating phase but even in the relationship phase, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of because it’s simply an effect of being human. Although it's normal to feel anxious, it's important to remember that leaving anxiety untreated can have detrimental side effects that impact our daily lives.
Relationship Anxiety: Signs And How To Overcome It
Anxiety is a common issue many people face, which can significantly impact romantic relationships. Here are several ways that anxiety can show up in romantic relationships and what you can do about them:
Relationship Anxiety Signs #1: Overthinking
The anxious brain can feel difficult to manage. People with anxiety tend to overthink situations, causing them to become anxious and worried about things that may not be a big deal. This can lead to arguments and misunderstandings in a relationship, as the anxious partner may worry about things that the other partner does not find concerning. Challenging irrational thoughts and having conversations about those that feel rational is important. Often, the quick fix to feeling anxious in a relationship is communication.
Relationship Anxiety Signs #2: Need for Reassurance
Individuals with anxiety may need constant reassurance from their partner, which can be draining for the other partner. It is important for the anxious partner to work on building their own self-confidence and trust in their partner.
Relationship Anxiety Signs #3: Fear of Abandonment
Anxious attachment, much? People with anxiety may have a fear of abandonment, causing them to become clingy or too dependent on their partner. This can be difficult for the other partner, who may feel smothered or unable to have their own space. It is important for the anxious partner to learn how to manage their fear of abandonment and trust in their partner's commitment to the relationship.
Going to therapy is often the first step to healing your abandonment wound because it’s much deeper than your partner’s actions, and if you don’t get to the root of the problem, you will continue to watch the problem grow.
Relationship Anxiety Signs #4: Avoidance
Individuals with anxiety may avoid situations or conversations that make them feel anxious or uncomfortable, leading to a lack of communication and intimacy in the relationship. If you want to build a safe and secure relationship, you have to be an active participant in your relationship. Do things like couple experiences or card games to enhance emotional intimacy and build a safe relationship you don’t want to run away from.
Relationship Anxiety Signs #5: Control
Anxiety can lead to a need for control, manifesting in a relationship as controlling behavior. This behavior can come from jealousy and other issues, and it can become destructive and damaging to both partners. It is important for the anxious partner to manage their anxiety and develop healthier coping mechanisms. Remember, being in a relationship does not mean you own your partner. Control is a personal issue that your partner cannot fix for you.
Trying to rob them of their autonomy will cause friction and lead to relationship dissatisfaction based on your inability to be a secure partner. Get the help you need by working through your fear of letting go and discerning where your controlling behavior stems from.
Relationship Anxiety Signs #6: Perfectionism
People with anxiety may have a tendency towards perfectionism, leading to unrealistic expectations and pressure in the relationship. It is important for the anxious partner to learn how to manage their anxiety and develop a more realistic and compassionate view of themselves and their partner.
Anxiety can have a significant impact on romantic relationships. It is important for both partners to work together to manage anxiety, develop healthy coping mechanisms, communicate effectively, and trust each other. However, it is also important to do the inner work, as anxiety can be an internal issue that your partner cannot fix for you.
If you want to build a healthy relationship, you must contribute to it by engaging in healthy behaviors.
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Featured image by Shutterstock
Originally published on July 14, 2023
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In The Dominican Republic, I Found Paradise, Presence & Permission To Pause
As I grow deeper into my mindfulness practice, I’m constantly reminded of how essential it is to be present. Our society is filled with so many distractions that we often don’t give our full attention to the things and people that matter most.
That’s why I was eager to learn more about Hyatt’s Inclusive Collection’s “Time Here Is Worth More” campaign. The campaign was designed to create meaningful moments for individuals who crave quality time with loved ones, relaxation, and much more. In other words, it allows you to be present with yourself and others.
I was elated at the opportunity to experience this firsthand at their newest all-inclusive resort, Secrets Playa Esmeralda in Miches, Dominican Republic. It was there that I realized that everything I’ve learned so far on my mindfulness journey had been worth it.
From listening to world-renowned mindfulness expert and author Deepak Chopra, M.D., speak to swinging on top of a mountain. I was able to tap back into who I am and relish in the person I’m becoming. Here are a few takeaways from my three-day trip.

London on the balcony of her suite at Secrets Playa Esmeralda, Miches, DR
Courtesy
Luxury Is My Birthright
There’s nothing like living in the lap of luxury and Secrets Playa Esmeralda provided that and more. Once I arrived at the sprawling resort, I was greeted with champagne. Then I was whisked away to my deluxe suite and it was more than I expected. It was spacious, yet comfortable. It sat right on the beach giving me unobstructed views of the white sand and crystal blue waters.
I could hear the ocean waves in my room, which was really nice during bedtime. I had a butler who assisted me with whatever I needed and I took advantage of the turn down service every night. I spent time in the pool, on the beach, and at the spa. It was magical.

Yoga at Secrets Playa Esmeralda, Miches, DR
Courtesy
Digital Distractions Are Real
Every evening, our group met for dinner with the option to put our phones away. This was in line with the theme of being present and while I didn’t mind giving my phone away, it was odd not having it with me. I know I’m not alone in saying I use my phone a lot. Whether to look something up, to take photos, or to mindlessly scroll in between conversations.
However, it wasn’t until my wrist started buzzing that I realized I was wearing my Apple Watch. Further proving how much we rely on electronics and need a break from it. While my Apple Watch is also considered a digital distraction, I wasn’t as tempted to check it as I would my phone.

London visiting Montaña Redonda in Miches, DR
Courtesy
Being Present Is A Must
It was an honor to sit across from Dr. Chopra, the man who teaches on the very things I’ve been learning about these past few years. His presence was magnetic and I was excited to hear him speak live for the first time.
He joined Hyatt’s Wellbeing Collective Advisory Board and created an exclusive AI, DeepakChopra.ai for the resort. Before our intimate conversation with the author of The Seven Spiritual Laws Of Success, he led us into meditation.
From there, he dropped a lot of gems, particularly as it relates to being present. “Presence is divine,” he told us. He also shared some advice on how to stay present. “Periodically, ask yourself, ‘Am I here?’ When you ask yourself, you will be present,” he said.
I often go on exciting trips, but what made this one special was the emphasis on being present. Thanks to the constant reminder, I was able to really sit back, relax, and soak in the picturesque resort. Not to mention, I also got to explore other parts of the island like a Cacao farm and Montaña Redonda, a mountain with jaw-dropping views.
This trip came at a crucial time in my life where I was trying to figure out what to do next in my career and it allowed me to sit still and embrace the unknown.
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