

Recently, the acronym BIPOC has been used when addressing issues surrounding Black Lives Matter, and the Black experience overall. I noticed the trend after the murder of George Floyd, a 46-year-old Black man killed in Minneapolis during an arrest for allegedly using a counterfeit bill that resulted in him being pinned to the ground by former officer Derek Chauvin who kept his knee on Floyd's neck for at least eight minutes and 46 seconds while he spoke the same words Eric Garner did as he died at the hands of police, "I can't breathe."
When companies and communities began to speak out and demand justice for the senseless murder and biases that we face in this country, the term 'BIPOC' was at the helm of many conversations. It led me to wonder who exactly they're talking to and why again the Black community has to adapt to yet another name change?
It's enough as an African-American to unpack that I'm African without memory, and American without privilege, and now I'm expected to take time out of my Black day to Google this foolishness?
Don’t call me BIPOC.
— “Scottie Beam” (@ScottieBeam) June 15, 2020
Unless you want hands and feet put on you.
After some research, I discovered that BIPOC stands for "Black, Indigenous and People of Color". According to The Oxford English Dictionary, the phrase, "people of color" dates back centuries — it was first cited in The Oxford English Dictionary, with the British spelling "colour," in 1796 — and is often abbreviated as POC. Additionally, The New York Times reported that Black and Indigenous was included by Cynthia Frisby, a professor of strategic communication at the Missouri School of Journalism.
Miss me with the people of color talk today. Say Black with a capital B with your whole chest or don’t say anything.
— Matthew A. Cherry (@MatthewACherry) May 29, 2020
While I understand the desire to advocate for multiple groups, and the importance of the acknowledgment of Indigenous people, and people of color, the BIPOC community promotes the inclusion of all people of color who have been mistreated, misrepresented, and discriminated against and unites marginalized communities on more significant issues that hurt all non-white individuals. When you address a group of people that includes Black and Indigenous people of color, that term is acceptable. When you are advocating for issues Black and Indendegous people of color, that term is acceptable. Police brutality, however, is not one of them - it impacts Black, Latinx, and Native-American communities specifically.
Quite frankly, I want our community, and those who desire to hold space for us to know that in order to do that, they need to say Black with a Capital B. The term is the new People of Color, it's palatable. Many of us have had to unlearn the need to say 'people of color' when they desire to say Black, including myself.
And if you actually mean “people of color” then by all means, say that. It’s fine. I’m just asking you to examine your intentions so that Black people aren’t erased in discussions specifically meant for us.
— Robin Thede (@robinthede) June 2, 2020
Still, after hearing another Black women address issues impacting our community specifically, and use the acronym, I thought that maybe I was being dramatic and questioned if I had unlearning to do. Days later, as I sat with my thoughts, the heroes of Black Twitter reminded me that my experience and perspective were valid as I felt silenced by trending terms.
The entire world had to shut down for this county to finally begin paying attention to the preservation of Black life, and we can't even have that?
This isn't to say that there shouldn't be spaces where the BIPOC community comes together. However, we deserve to take up space in conversations that impact us more than any other race, and we shouldn't feel the need to apologize for that.
BIPOC is another way for white people to avoid saying black. don't call me that, please.
— Corey Stokes (@coreystokesss) June 11, 2020
Saying BIPOC when that's not who you wish to target allows this county to continue to avoid the harm that it's done to us, and it drowns out the Black community's cries. As a Black woman in this county, whose Great-Grandmother was Native-American and the first generation to move off of her reservation, I am well aware of the struggles that other groups face. This call-to-action is to not dismiss Indigenous people and people of color that have their own individual inequalities that they fight for.
This is to ask that just as Black people do not attach ourselves to those issues, do not lump us all together when discussing who is disproportionately shot, killed, and put in jail at the hands of police.
Doing so is beyond lazy, it's dismissive, and moreover it tells us that you don't think about what impacts us to the same magnitude as you do when other groups are involved. This country has 400 years worth of conversations specifically for Black people.
Now more than ever, we need to make sure we take up space, specifically for us.
Featured image by Shutterstock
Dubbed one of the "21 Black Women Wellness Influencers You Should Follow" by Black + Well, Yasmine Jameelah continues to leave her digital footprint across platforms ranging from Forever 21 Plus, Vaseline, and R29 Unbothered discussing all things healing and body positivity. As a journalist, her writing can be found on sites such as Blavity, Blacklove.com, and xoNecole. Jameelah is also known for her work shattering unconventional stigmas surrounding wellness through her various mediums, including her company Transparent Black Girl. Find Yasmine @YasmineJameelah across all platforms.
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Love Is The Muse: How Skylar And Temi Built A Creative Life Together
When Temitope Ibisanmi DM’d the word “muse” to Skylar Marshai, he knew he was shooting his romantic shot. He didn’t realize, however, that he was connecting with his future business and creative partner, too.
“I was the boyfriend,” Temi says. “Everybody out there knows, you’re the cameraman at that point.”
Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Today, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak