I'm 6'4 And I Love To Wear Heels
My name is Bree Wijnaar, and I'm a 6'4'' woman who unashamedly loves to rock a cute pair of heels. For years people have questioned my decision to add an extra two to four inches to my already towering frame, as if it were wrong of me to want to feel just as much of a woman as my smaller lady friends. I admit that I wasn't always so confident with my height, and that it took some time to accept that being different was nothing to be ashamed of.
I was born in Rotterdam, The Netherlands, where the regal and powerful name Brunnhilde was bestowed upon me. Growing up in the “land of the tall," it wasn't uncommon to see men and women of exceptional height, however, I never imagined that I would be one of the few anomalies that would walk the halls of my high school. I was a little taller than average, but nothing noticeable until about the age of 10. Mother Nature had some interesting plans for me, and I started growing at a pace that was off the charts. I would grow out of clothes literally weeks after I had gotten them, and within the family there was a general feeling of “What on earth is happening to Brunnhilde?"
You can imagine that I was a fascinating phenomenon for doctors as well, who estimated that I would grow about six feet tall. There were frequent visits to keep a close eye on my growth, which in time revealed that their calculations were inaccurate as I grew well past the six-foot mark.
By age 14, I was a 6'4 teenager with size 14 feet and the curves of a grown woman. How do you like them apples?!
Being an unusually tall teenage girl made standing out from the crowd easy and admittedly uncomfortable. People would stare at me a lot, especially since tripping over my own feet was a regular occurrence as I attempted to adjust to my incessantly growing body. Boys were intimated by my size, so I wasn't often asked out on dates, and I would pass on going on shopping trips with my girlfriends because most retail stores didn't carry my size.
And then there were the questions and comments from strangers whenever I would go out and about:
“How tall are you?"
“Do you play ball?"
“How tall are your parents?"
“How is the weather up there?"
The comments and stares seem to multiply whenever I'd throw on a pair of heels. It seemed as if I couldn't go one day without being judged and analyzed by strangers looking for justification as to why I would want to be any taller than I was.
As a teenage girl just trying to adjust to the transition into adulthood, I struggled to manage the unsolicited attention. I masked my insecurities with humor and overconfidence as I maneuvered through those uncomfortable encounters.
But one day I decided that enough was enough, and that it was time to embrace the thing that I couldn't change. I accepted who I was and began to learn to love my beautiful, long legs and the heels that made them look even more amazing.
Today, at 32-years-old, I can sincerely say that I am very proud of my height and I would not change it for the world. For me, having a clear overview of the room standing at 6'6 in my lowest heels is a powerful feeling. On an average night out you can find me standing up straight and enjoying the view—people watching like everyone else, but with a 6'6 first class seat. I have learned how to take full advantage of my tall stature, and to use my voice to speak on the unique challenges and opportunities that woman of height experience.
To my fellow tall sisters, I hope you choose to wear what makes you feel beautiful, elegant, empowered, comfortable and ready to take on the world. Embrace who you are, and dare to be different!
Are there any tall sisters who can relate to my experience? Share your story below!
Bree is the founder of The Tall Society--a supportive online community bringing together tall woman worldwide. Follow her movement on Instagram at @thetallsociety.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Between the rise of the creator economy and the gig economy, the window of opportunity to leverage your creativity for long-term gain has never been more potent.
For the last four years, I’ve worked as a full-time freelance writer and content creator. A year into this journey, I knew that if I wanted to create a sense of structure around my life outside of a traditional 9-5, I would have to create it.
To my surprise, that came in the form of social media.
Now, you might be wondering how someone might be able to juggle their work in a creatively-dominant career like writing while still having the mental capacity to produce ideas for their own personal brand, and well, that answer didn’t come easily.
In 2021, I hit a wall with writing and content creation.
With the stress and uncertainty that came as a result of the pandemic, to being burned out from having to live off my creativity, I reached a breaking point. For me, writing was always a space to explore my thoughts, process heavy topics, and express concepts that only words could bring reason to. However, when I didn’t have the brainpower to write or create content, I knew it was time to set parameters around my hobby of content creation and my passion for storytelling.
In this case, the biggest challenge was finding the balance between the two by releasing the guilt and shame of taking a break from both in order to reconnect with them.
Through years of trial and error, the fog finally cleared, and I was able to hit my stride in 2023. From garnering over 10K followers on TikTok, building an Instagram community around lifestyle and creative encouragement, along with my wellness collective, Black Girl Playground, and writing for xoNecole as a lifestyle contributor, the creative juices have been flowing steadily.
And it all happened by creating a strategy that allowed space for planning, resting, and creating. Today, I’ll be sharing my top tips to help you find your balance between your side hustle and passions.
On staying inspired and motivated when working on various content creation and freelancing projects:
Early this year, I came to the bright conclusion that I needed to shorten the gap between ideation and execution — and it completely changed how I create.
Oftentimes, when we have an idea come to us, we let it sit for too long, and then before we know it, we’ve either lost the enthusiasm to put it into action, or someone else grabs it. If you want to stay in a flow of creativity, whether side projects or full-time work, it’s important to not get slowed down by self-doubt, procrastination, or perfectionism.
Give yourself permission to act on your ideas as they come to you. Even if they’re a little muddy or not “perfect,” you can always fine-tune them later.
@yagirlaley shrinking the gap between [ideation] + [execution] 🧠💡#fyp #creativeadvice
On the importance of choosing a niche:
If there’s one thing that has helped me balance my work as a writer and content creator, it’s putting each in its own niche (or category). By definition, a niche is a specialized segment of the market or a specific area of expertise.
When you are creating in the same niche that you’re also making a living in, that’s an easy way to get your wires crossed. And at times, this could lead to feeling as if you don’t have any ideas for yourself because you’ve given them to the other area you're juggling.
When balancing two, you want to have enough fresh ideas to give to your personal projects and your full-time work to avoid any overlap. This ensures that your personal creative vision isn’t compromised when working on client projects while still having some for yourself.
On the strategies that have helped to maintain a consistent workflow in both areas:
I can’t stress enough how important it is to create a workflow and structure for yourself as a freelancer — this applies to those with a 9-5 in the day and a 5-9 at night, too.
As someone who admittedly has ADHD tendencies, object permanence can sometimes create a block in time and project management. That’s why I encourage creatives and professionals to create systems that allow you to see the work that’s ahead of you.
Personally, I can’t live without having multiple calendars going at once. My Google calendar keeps track of interviews for articles and events, while my physical calendar helps me keep track of important dates. I also work out of an Excel sheet where I can log in ongoing stories and track their status from drafting to submission. I’ve also heard great things about the Notion app for planning and tracking.
When it comes to creating content, spending time doing bulk content days has been an asset to my creative workflow. When I complete the videos, I save them to my drafts and upload them as needed.
Credit: Amberita
Courtesy of the writer
On the best advice for someone who is considering pursuing both content creation and freelancing simultaneously:
Don’t be ashamed of taking a break and resting — because both are essential to the life of a creative. Last month, I returned to Instagram after taking 6 months off from posting. During that time, I worked on growing my TikTok page, using the platform to practice vulnerability and allowing myself to put the fun back into creating content. Without the time, I can’t say I’d be able to approach Instagram with the same ease and playfulness; but thanks to that time away, it was possible.
Resting, letting our minds wander, or simply doing nothing are all just as productive as creating. No one can produce at all times, we have to allow ourselves the space for new concepts and ideas to flow to us. In addition to that, when we take breaks from social media, it allows us to stop the wheel of comparison and consume more than we create. So if you feel like you’re in a creative rut with all you want to balance, it may be time to take a step back, unapologetically.
Your creativity will thank you for it.
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Featured image by Sir Taylor