Don't even act like you didn't know this was coming. As we're entering the "out with the old, in with the new" portion of the 2019 program, this is when you won't be able to get online without seeing at least two articles a day on what will be trending in the new decade. However, what might be harder to find than anything else are the healthy food trends that you should take special note of.
In 2020, things will be interesting. "Interesting" in the sense of being a little all over the place, super intriguing and definitely what will require a little more effort on our parts. But if you're looking to expand your palate and also spend a little more time in your own kitchen in the new year, these are things that will help you to accomplish both goals—exquisitely and effectively so.
1.West African Foods
When I read that West African foods would be big in 2020, I immediately smiled. I know several people from Ghana and pretty much every single one of them are gorgeous. GORGEOUS. Anyway, as far as the types of foods that part of the world eats—millet, teff, fufu, yams, avocados, black-eyed peas, mangos, pineapple, ginger, lemongrass, coconut, peanut oil and the combo of tomatoes, onions, and bell peppers as a base for dishes are all extremely popular.
If 2020 is the year that you want to expand your diet with something unique, another popular West African food is sorghum. It's a cereal grain that is gluten-free, rich in fiber, high in protein and iron, and is able to help with controlling your blood sugar levels. You can buy it as a grain; some people enjoy it in syrup form as well.
2. CBD Foods and Drinks
OK, so in the spirit of responsible writing, I would be remiss if I didn't share this off the rip—"CBD-Infused Food and Beverages Are Still Illegal Under US law. So Why Are They Everywhere?". From what I read, this is battle that the FDA knows that they probably won't win; especially since there are currently over 1000 CBD-infused foods and drinks available online alone. That said, yep, it is another food trend that is only going to get bigger in the new year.
And just what are the benefits of consuming foods (and drinks) that have cannabidiol—the non-intoxicating chemical compound that's found in the cannabis plant)—in it? Well, the properties in CBD are anti-inflammatory, anti-anxiety and anti-spasmodic. This makes CBD great at treating pain, depression, keeping diabetes at bay, strengthening the heart and even getting rid of acne if it's consumed on a semi-consistent basis.
If you'd like to see a few examples of CBD foods, it's worth your time to read "What Are CBD Foods and Why Are They Everywhere?" A Hemp Bar or two might be just what the doctor ordered (relatively speaking).
3. Nut and Seed Butters and Spreads
If you'd like to put a spread on your toast or crackers, but you don't want it to be butter, go to your local health food store to pick up some nut or seed butters instead. Some examples of a nut butter include cashew, almond, hazelnut, walnut and, of course, peanut. Some seed butters include pumpkin, watermelon, and sunflower. All are packed with protein, have their own unique flavor, and are full of vitamins and minerals.
4. Jackfruit
Believe it or not, jackfruit is being used more and more as a meat substitute. So, if you're vegetarian or are attempting to go vegan in the new year, this is a food that you'll definitely want to have on hand. Jackfruit contains a significant amount of vitamins A and C. It also has about two grams of protein and six grams of fiber in it per serving. Unripe jackfruit is ideal for meat-like recipes while ripe jackfruit is oftentimes put into smoothies and baked goods. As far as where to cop some, you should be able to find it pretty easily at your local Whole Foods or Trader Joe's stores.
5. Mocktails
Mocktails (fake cocktails) will also be big in 2020. As I was reading a few articles on this particular food trend, some of the authors brought up a valid point. With mocktails, not only do you not have to work around the after-effects that alcohol can bring, drinking and serving them can save you a heck of a lot of money too. So, if you've got a party coming up, consider offering a couple of mocktails as alternatives. If you have no clue of where to even begin when it comes to building your mocktail mental library, this link features 50 mocktail recipes to get you started.
6. Lotus Seeds
The lotus plant is the kind of plant that is popular in parts of Southeast Asia. The seeds themselves contain a good amount of calcium, magnesium, manganese, pantothenic acid, phosphorus, potassium, protein and thiamin.
As far as its health benefits go, lotus seeds have a good reputation for treating insomnia, strengthening your digestive system, fighting aging signs, healing gum disease, giving an energy boost and supporting newly pregnant moms by giving their babies what they need to have a strong nervous system.
Believe it or not, Walmart sells lotus seeds. So does Amazon. As far as how to eat them, many mash the seeds up with some sugar and salt and serve it as a paste on pancakes, etc. You can check out an easy-to-make recipe here.
7. Middle Eastern Spices
If you enjoy Middle Eastern cuisine, commit to preparing more dishes from the comfort of your own home by stocking up on some traditional Middle Eastern spices. Ones that top the list include turmeric, cumin, cardamom, cinnamon, Baharat, sumac, nutmeg, allspice and anise seed. If you want to impress your own damn self with your knowledge of Middle Eastern foods, also pick up some ras el hanout. It's a spice that is a combo of sweet, spicy and savory. It's so good that its name literally translates to mean "top shelf". (You should be able to find all of those at your local grocery store, by the way.)
8. Fruit and Veggie Flours
Here's the deal—when things are refined, a lot of what makes them good in the first place are removed. Such is the case with refined white flour (read "The Dark Side of White Flour"). But if you like to bake, even half as much as I do, an alternative you might want to try that just happens to be another big food trend for next year are flours that are made from fruits and vegetables. Two that are going to be getting a lot of shine are banana flour and cauliflower flour. Both contain a similar texture to refined white flour while also having the nutrients that naturally come with them. It truly is the best of both worlds.
9. Biodynamic Wine
C'mon, wine experts. You tell me what biodynamic wine is. Basically, it's the kind of wine that is prepared in such a way where it has no chemicals at all in it; not only is this kind of sustainable processing good for the planet, it's healthier for you in the long run as well. This is an alcohol trend that's been growing for a couple of years now, so it's not hard to find. But if you'd like a cheat sheet on how to get the best kind of biodynamic wine at an affordable price, check out "The Best Biodynamic and Organic Wines For Under $30".
10. Alternative Sweeteners
If there are two things that all of us could stand to consume a heck of a lot less of next year, it's dairy (eww) and white sugar (double eww). As far as sugar goes, consuming less of it doesn't mean that you can't still appease your sweet tooth. The key is to do it in a healthier fashion. Molasses is packed with iron. Coconut sugar is unrefined, so it contains all of the nutrients that coconuts do. Monk fruit is actually 150 times sweeter than sugar, which means you can use much less of it, which means you don't have to worry about accumulating as many calories as with sugar. All you need to do to enjoy date paste is to combine ¾ teaspoon of water, ½ teaspoon of vanilla extract and a cup of dates. Mash it all up and you're good to go.
And then there's honey. Honey helps to lower cholesterol levels, is an energy booster, is a great sugar substitute for diabetics, is loaded with antioxidants and, has antibacterial and antifungal properties in it too. The best kind of honey to get is raw (unrefined) honey.
You can click here to figure out which brand would prove to be best for you.
11. Supporting Local Farmers
Another way to be more responsible with your diet is to support local farmers by going to farmer's markets more often. The food is fresher, it helps to stabilize our local economies, it's sustainable, it's a wonderful way to stay connected within your community and, oftentimes it's cheaper than going to the grocery store. Everything about the farmer's markets is worth making a weekend run. Try and do more of that next year, will you?
12. Meal Kits
Just last week, I was talking to a male friend of mine who is the consummate bachelor. He admittedly sucks in the kitchen and shared that one of the best things that's happened to him lately are meal kits. His exact words were, "It's a lot healthier than eating out and it makes me feel like I know what I'm doing, even though I don't." If you can relate to where he's coming from, meal kits are also pretty cool because they come with all that you need to prepare a full meal in a box. If you'd like to try "meal kitting" next year—Sun Basket has a great reputation among vegetarians and Home Chef has the best reputation overall. Some other companies that are also popular include Blue Apron, Hello Fresh and Purple Carrot.
Or, if you still want to go out, but you want to eat healthier and preferably at Black-owned establishments, check out Eboneats.
Or, if you happen to live in Georgia or New Jersey, Eat Clean Bro does meal prepping. Here's to eatin' right in 2020, y'all. For real, for real.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
Plantain Flour, Spirulina & Other Uncommon Foods To Add To Your Diet
The Foods You Should & Shouldn't Be Eating On A Plant-Based Diet
10 "Healthy" Foods That Actually, Well...Aren't
Here Are Some "Holiday Season Foods" That Are Actually Good For You
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RELATED
Kayla Nicole says she wore a dress that was once worn by Braxton herself for the Halloween costume. “It’s not a secret Toni is more on the petite side. I’m obsessed with all 5’2” of her,” she tells xoNecole via email. “But I’m 5’10'' and not missing any meals, honey, so to my surprise, when I got the dress and it actually fit, I knew it was destiny.”
The episode was the perfect way for the multihyphenate to take control of her own narrative. By addressing the viral moment on her own platform, she was able to stir the conversation and keep the focus on her adoration for Braxton, an artist she says she grew up listening to and who still makes her most-played playlist every year. Elsewhere, she likely would’ve received questions about whether or not the costume was a subliminal aimed at her ex-boyfriend and his pop star fiancée. “I think that people will try to project their own narratives, right?” she said, hinting at this in the episode. “But, for me personally – I think it’s very important to say this in this moment – I’m not in the business of tearing other women down. I’m in the business of celebrating them.”
Kayla Nicole is among xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, powered by SheaMoisture, recognized in the Viral Voices category for her work in media and the trends she sets on our timelines, all while prioritizing her own mental and physical health. As she puts it: “Yes, I’m curating conversations on my podcast The Pre-Game, and cultivating community with my wellness brand Tribe Therepē.”
Despite being the frequent topic of conversation online, Kayla Nicole says she’s learning to take advantage of her growing social media platform without becoming consumed by it. “I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out,” she says.
On The Pre-Game, which launched earlier this year, she has positioned herself as listeners “homegirl.” “There’s definitely a delicate dance between being genuine and oversharing, and I’ve had to learn that the hard way. Now I share from a place of reflection, not reaction,” she says. “If it can help someone feel seen or less alone, I’ll talk about it within reason. But I’ve certainly learned to protect parts of my life that I cherish most. I share what serves connection but doesn’t cost me peace.
"I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out."
Credit: Malcolm Roberson
Throughout each episode, she sips a cocktail and addresses trending topics (even when they involve herself). It’s a platform the Pepperdine University alumnus has been preparing to have since she graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, with a concentration in political science.
“I just knew I was going to end up on a local news network at the head anchor table, breaking high speed chases, and tossing it to the weather girl,” she says. Instead, she ended up working as an assistant at TMZ before covering sports as a freelance reporter. (She’s said she didn’t work for ESPN, despite previous reports saying otherwise.) The Pre-Game combines her love for pop culture and sports in a way that once felt inaccessible to her in traditional media.
She’s not just a podcaster, though. When she’s not behind the mic, taking acting classes or making her New York Fashion Week debut, Kayla Nicole is also busy elevating her wellness brand Tribe Therepē, where she shares her workouts and the workout equipment that helps her look chic while staying fit. She says the brand will add apparel to its line up in early 2026.
“Tribe Therepē has evolved into exactly what I have always envisioned. A community of women who care about being fit not just for the aesthetic, but for their mental and emotional well-being too. It’s grounded. It’s feminine. It’s strong,” she says. “And honestly, it's a reflection of where I am in my life right now. I feel so damn good - mentally, emotionally, and physically. And I am grateful to be in a space where I can pour that love and light back into the community that continues to pour into me.”
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image by Malcolm Roberson
Back to Swayvo Twain, though. After I saw numerous posts about the fact that D’Angelo’s song “Send It On” was a creative collaboration that his parents made in his honor after he was born — I found myself wondering just how many times he’s listened to it this year and especially over the past several weeks. And then, I was like, “Lawd. What is this man’s holiday season going to be like?” I can only imagine.
Holiday seasons mean different things to different people. Yet if you’re someone who has lost a dear loved one (familial or not) this past year and a part of you is absolutely not looking forward to the holiday season because of it — I just want you to know that I see you and I want to provide a few thoughts, just so you don’t have to overthink or unnecessarily pressure yourself or feel like you’ve got to “put on” anything during this time. You absolutely don’t.
And here, in more detail, is exactly what I mean by that.
Expect to Go Through the Five Stages of Grief. Repeatedly.
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Grief is layered and sometimes really complicated. Partly because, well, you’ve heard of the five stages of grief, right — denial, bargaining, anger, depression and acceptance? Well, the thing is, sometimes you can find yourself going through some of those stages simultaneously. Like you might be in denial and angry. Or you might be depressed while accepting the reality that someone who you really cared about is gone. And what’s really wild is sometimes the oddest things can put you in those emotional spaces.
Take my godchildren’s mom, for example. There is a movie called Lucky 7 (Kelly Williams-Paisley, Patrick Dempsey) that makes me think about her. That’s because a part of her story is that she and the lead character in the film both lost their mother to cancer when they were seven. Anyway, Rissi (that’s her name although everyone knows that I typically just refer to her as “my godchildren’s mom” — LOL) said that a couple of weeks ago, she woke herself up sobbing and missing her mom, even though she’s been gone for 37 years now.
When she said that she didn’t know where the wave of grief came from, I reminded her about her single “Old Black Southern Woman” (which premiered November 7 and I've included under this point, so that I can show my babies off) and since the song is in tribute to her mother, that’s probably the origin story of it all.
Honestly, though, when you lose someone dear, you don’t really need a reason. I mean, think about it — none of us “love with an expiration date” and so trying to figure out what to do with the emotions, the commitment, the relationship now that everything about it has permanently shifted? Yeah, it can take you on quite the emotional roller coaster ride. Repeatedly. Without real cause or reason.
And you know what? That is okay.
Grieve how you need to…as it comes.
Surround Yourself with People Who Will Let You…BE
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One thing about losing a parent or a spouse or (whew) a child is, once it happens to you and then you hear about it happening to someone else, you are able to empathize on a whole ‘nother level compared to those who have yet to experience that depth of loss. As a direct result, you get that sometimes they will be in a good mood and then sometimes, without warning, they will isolate. You get that sometimes they will take you up on your offer to hang out and then sometimes you may not hear from them for weeks on end. You even get that sometimes, their energy will switch up on you in mid-conversation and that you can’t personalize it. They are in “grief aftershock” and sometimes, it catches them totally off guard.
And that’s why it’s so important — crucial even — that you are intentional, especially this year, to surround yourself with people who will give you the space and grace to grieve however you need to. Because while you shouldn’t be out here just being mean and rude, if you’re not your best self, folks who are really in tuned to the magnitude of your loss will get that — even to the point of not stressing you out or guilt tripping you if you’d prefer to sit this holiday season (or portions of it) out.
Yeah, the great grief support people? They will be interested in you doing what is best for you — not in you doing what they think is best for you. BIG DIFFERENCE THERE, CHILE.
Try Not to Emotionally Trigger Yourself
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This is a tricky one because, since it is your first holiday season without your loved one, probably all kinds of stuff will get to you. All I’m saying is that you should let memories happen naturally instead of looking for things that will make you feel bad or low.
For instance, if going through every photo of them that you have in your possession will bring you comfort, by all means, pull them all out. However, if doing that is going to make you feel really sad and put you in a state of restlessness and irritation — why punish yourself in that way? Or if there is a holiday movie that the two of you enjoyed together and watching it will somehow make you feel close to them, enjoy. On the other hand, if it’s going to have you an emotional wreck to where you can barely sleep or get out of bed — why do that to yourself?
One way that AI defines an emotional trigger is this: “An emotional trigger is a stimulus that causes a strong, often overwhelming emotional or psychological reaction that feels disproportionate to the current situation”. Did you catch all of that? Triggers are something that overwhelms you in spite of what your current situation may actually be.
Listen, grief is overwhelming enough. Try to be really kind and discerning by not going out of your way to emotionally trigger yourself in the process of handling all that is already on your mind, heart and spirit’s plate.
Prioritize Self-Care
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Years ago, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “The Self-Care Checklist Every Woman Needs.” When you get a chance, please check it out because it covers things like forgiving yourself and taking personal days — both of which are relevant to this piece.
Another reason why losing a loved one can be devastating for some of us is because it can bring forth feelings of regret. Maybe you didn’t have a specific conversation with them that you should’ve. Perhaps you wish that you had taken better advantage of the time that you had with them while they were alive. It could be that you regret not being more of what they needed. Whatever the case may be, their purpose is complete on this planet.
You know whose isn’t? LOOK IN THE MIRROR. You’ve got to forgive yourself and — as I’ve said many times before, one of my favorite definitions of forgiveness is by author Gary Zukav: “Accepting that the past can’t change,” which, interestingly enough, could play a role in the final stage of grief which is acceptance.
And the personal days part? I mean, it is the holiday season, right? If you’ve got personal or vacation days, TAKE THEM. Just as much as work can get your mind off of things, it can also wear you down too, if you’re not careful. Spending some days doing nothing but sleeping, reading or watching movies could be just what you need right now. Because when you’re healing from the loss of the loved one, self-care isn’t a luxury — it is absolutely paramount.
Be Okay with Not Knowing
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“Know” is an interesting word. One of its definitions is “to perceive or understand as fact or truth; to apprehend clearly and with certainty.” That said, a few weeks ago, my mother’s husband sent me a grief quote. Although it wasn’t something that I personally resonated with (for many reasons that we don’t have time to get into today), I do believe that many things happen for more than a reason; they have a purpose — and perhaps the quote was for this article:
"When you lose someone, it feels like the entire map of your life has been erased. You still hold the paper in your hands, but the destination seems to be gone. And that’s just one part of grief. People don’t really talk about…Not just the missing person, but the missing sense of direction. The hardest truth is that no one can hand you a new map to your life. It’s up to you to build a compass on your own, one day and one moment at a time. That compass won’t appear overnight, but every choice you survive becomes part of it." (Brendan Shaw)
One thing that is so…let’s go with the word “rough” about death is that it comes in and alters the plans that you had for your life when it comes to the person you lost — and that can have you out here on some “So, what now?”…without having a single clue. Because you’re trying to wrap your mind around what happened and how you are supposed to adjust to it, it can feel like you don’t really have the words, let alone any ideas, about how to move forward. And that is something that you need to make peace with — the not knowing, I mean.
Yeah, that reminds me. There is a project that my mother co-executive produced many years ago. On it, there is a song entitled, “You Don’t Have to Know Why” (Tata Vega/Maia Amada). The chorus goes as follows:
You don’t have to know why
‘Cause the why is unimportant
You don’t have to know when
‘Cause time is not a factor
You don’t have to know what
You don’t have to know how
‘Cause his love for you is all you need to know
Geeze. You see how many times “know” pops up? When you lose someone and your life feels like it has totally turned upside down because of it — be patient with yourself; you don’t have to perceive or understand what’s next. Not right now. Sometimes just getting out of bed, putting one foot in front of another towards your shower and actually getting into is more than enough.
Oh, and did you peep how the last line of the chorus says that “his love” is all that you need to know? They are talking about God — and that brings me to my next point/tip.
KNOW That God Can Handle Every Single Emotion
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Someone in my world is really angry with God right now about a loss that they currently experienced. It’s not the death of a person; it’s the end of a marriage (which is a death in its own kind of way). They are angry with God because they feel like he doesn’t care that they gave their all and their spouse left anyway.
Another topic for another time is that we can’t be thankful that God gave us the power of choice/free will and then turn around and want him to rescind that offer to others. For now I’ll just say what I said to them: “Girl, do you know how many times I’ve been mad at God? And do you know that God doesn’t stop being God just because I’m angry. He can handle your emotions. Trust me.”
And P.S.: God isn’t mad that you’re mad. That’s why I’m so fond of the Scripture, “Be angry, and do not sin. Meditate within your heart on your bed, and be still. Selah.” (Psalm 4:4 — NKJV) Hmph. When I look at that word “meditate”, that makes me think of another verse: “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” (Psalm 46:10 — NKJV)
One definition of anger is “a strong feeling of displeasure and belligerence aroused by a wrong” — and why would you think that God wouldn’t understand that you aren’t pleased or that you feel wronged by losing someone? Of course, he does. And yet, peep the wisdom of King David. He said that when you feel that way, don’t do something reckless or even unwise. Instead, MEDITATE. Get still enough to remember that God is involved, even in your pain, confusion and emotional exhaustion. Because he is.
Exercise Self-Compassion with Every Moment…As It Comes
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And finally, I am big on the importance of practicing self-compassion; so much to the point where I penned the article, “12 Ways To Be Far More Self-Compassionate Every Day” a few years back. Compassion means “a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering” and suffering means “to undergo or feel pain or distress,” “to sustain injury, disadvantage, or loss” and “to endure pain, disability, death, etc., patiently or willingly.”
Self-compassion, in part, is about recognizing that you are suffering and then being intentional about doing what you can to reduce the pain that you are experiencing. Journal it out. Talk to a friend. Go for a long walk. Get a mani/pedi or massage. Take a nap. Indulge in some comfort food. See a grief therapist — love on yourself enough by giving your grief a platform to express itself and then find an outlet for the energy to manifest into something that will make you feel…encouraged.
____
My first major death blow happened when I was 21. I lost my fiancé on November 3, 1995 and then my closest great-grandparent the following day. Listen here, that first loss? It feels like you can’t breathe for days at a time — and that first holiday season? It’s pretty much a blur with many moments of heartache in them. That’s the bad news.
The good news is that you will get through it. Like a woman once said on a favorite sitcom of mine once upon a time, “Even despair will eventually exhaust itself” — and while it might not feel that way right now, that is 1000 percent the truth.
I won’t lie to you — probably not by Thanksgiving. Christmas and New Year’s either. Yet if you take my lived-out tips to heart, I believe that they can help make this first year without your loved one more bearable.
You might even smile and laugh a little bit. Yet if you don’t…again, give yourself some grace.
Yeah, feel what you feel…until you don’t.
At the end of the day, sis, that is just what self-love and validation during loss is all about.
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