I've had plenty of names for menstruation, each one more fitting than the last—my favorite being a Game of Thrones reference—the red wedding. And sometimes Aunt Flo is an utter b*tch, especially when I don't have birth control to keep my hot headed cramps at bay.
The only thing worse than Aunt Flo herself is the astronomical taxing of feminine hygiene products—better known as the pink tax. We don't talk nearly enough about how it affects low income women or women in prison. In fact, it wasn't all that long ago that a state rep in Maine suggested that by providing an adequate supply of feminine hygiene products, it would make prison like a country club.
I say to you in my best early 2000s crunk rapper voice, haaaan?
Well, I guess he's accurate in that sadly because this is a man's world forgoing free bleeding all over yourself has become a privilege much like a country club. As someone who has admittedly been caught stealing tampons in hardship and have in recent years foregone menstrual hygiene products for the better part of my period unless I luck up and find an old one lying around the house—I can tell you that not bleeding on yourself is not a feeling next to being admitted to a country club. It's quite literally as simple as feeling good about yourself in the most basic ways, feeling clean, and shame-free.
It's feeling carefree because you're not spending the days leading up to your period worrying about whether or not the red wedding is going to hit hard, killing all your panties in the process. I hadn't felt that in a long time because my months have been dedicated to picking and choosing what bills I will foot. Menstrual hygiene has not been one. I had been leaving my tampons in all day just to ration out the intermittent use of pads and tampons.
This, of course, also led my vagina to feel like it was on its deathbed as tampons are not meant to be in the vagina for that length of time.
Fortunately, in 2020, the options to go green is steadfast in every industry marketing products. So I started to do the research by my own accord of what it means to go green (i.e. saving my money) and I decided to give recyclable menstrual cups a try...again.
(I tried one once and I spent a great deal of time flipping shit and pinching my labia minora in a panicked effort to retrieve it.)
This time, I tried out three different brands: Bloody Buddy, Lena, and Lunette cups. And this time, I fell in love.
What You Need To Know About The Menstrual Cup + Reviews
You should know that menstrual cups are made from medical-grade silicone that are placed in the vagina in to catch Aunt Flo when she begins to fall, it can stay for up to 12 hours of her visit before you need to remove, empty, and rinse/wash.
Most brands size their cups based on lite or heavy flows, but some will ask you to take into account matters such as whether you've bore a child and others will ask you to consider how your cervix sits. I highly recommend reading up on these things before selecting a brand that works for you.
1. Bloody Buddy (two-pack), $26.99
I wanted this menstrual cup to be my fave because (hello) the name is, and don't get me wrong they were incredible—they just weren't for a newbie like me quite yet. Partially because I hadn't read up on soft cups versus hard cups prior to me troubleshooting on the toilet. After every insertion, I had this weird feeling when I was walking, like the little tether string was constantly rubbing up against my labia minora in a weird, friction-causing way. Assuming I hadn't fully inserted it, I went through the motions galloping through my hall in a side squat, taking my boots off to get up in there and rework the cup. It felt a lot like trying to jump into my jeans that barely fit. Although, eventually I was able to get it adjusted, it took a lot of footwork which wasn't conducive to my work day or productivity on any given day.
Regardless of the weird feeling I was having, I'm happy to report that I was leak-free with the Bloody Buddy. Not to mention, unlike many other brands, this one comes with two cups in each pack...periodt...and for a damn good price (the price of one through other brands), might I add. And even though the price varies by color, it wasn't a major tipping point as far as prices go.
2. Lena (two-pack), $39.90
These menstrual cups were ready for anything and easy to use just like their marketing as the "best beginner" cup suggested. My guess was that Lena cups were hard (hard cups, that is) due to how easy it was to place, as it reformed into an 'O' as soon as I inserted it. Most videos I found suggested rotating the cup after you've inserted it and so I did this with each cup to ensure that it was sealed properly, however, Lena was the only one that felt easy to rotate, only requiring the quick swirl of my index finger.
Lena was so easy and comfortable that I forgot I was wearing it and unlike tampons, there wasn't that irrational albeit urgent fear of toxins culminating in your vagina. I didn't have to lie in my bed and dig in my crotch and I appreciated that.
Price-wise they are pretty steep by comparison to the others. Nonetheless, the price point is so worth it when you consider that you can fund a good chunk of Aunt Flo's first year of college education with the money you spend buying tampons and other unrecyclable feminine hygiene products. They also don't charge you based on color preference, as it's likely included in the upfront cost. And lastly, it's easy insertion makes it well worth it.
3. Lunette (single pack), $26.99
While the Lunette menstrual cup got the short end of the stick as it didn't get to make its appearance until the last day of menstruation, it was still put to the test, especially because I knew what to look for with the cup.
I quickly discovered that these cups were of a softer variety, as well, making it difficult to expand once in my vagina. However, these were a bit easier than Bloody Buddy when it came down to adjusting them in order for it to fit properly. I had minimal issue with inserting my finger to shift the cup.
It can't go without being said: Off-top, I loved Lunette for having wipes to go with my cup and sanitizer. Despite YouTube video after YouTube video saying that while you can boil your cup to sanitize it in between cycles, you can wipe it with tissue or rinse it on the day-to-day of your menstruation—I was not fond of the former method. All I could envision is tissue residue stuck to my cup and thus internally floating in my vaginal canal. I enjoyed being able to thoroughly wipe my cup down after each 12-hour window and it was appreciated.
How It’s Going Down
Many of the products ask for you to account for a learning gap when it concerns leaking, but fortunately for me that wasn't something that I experienced. That could be due to the research I conducted prior to trying or the fact that my period is fairly light with the inclusion of my birth control. Either way, I suggest doing some additional research, plus giving your menstrual cup a trial run prior to your period.
How you fold impacts how smoothly your insertion process goes, and thus, the leakage you experience. Through YouTube reviews, I found that my favorite folds were the tulip/push down method and the seven fold—the seven became the ultimate with a little work on my grip and by little I mean my hands are a bit on the small side, so I had to remember to apply pressure to hold it down prior to inserting it into my vagina.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our weekly newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
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Originally published on May 8, 2019
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
Then there were those who gave up their zip code altogether and found a permanent home in the skies. After years spent recruiting students for a university, Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare became a full-time travel influencer and founded her travel company, Shakespeare Agency. And she's not alone.
These stories mirror the experiences of women across the world. For millions, the pandemic induced a seismic shift in priorities and desires. Corporate careers that were once hailed as the ultimate “I made it” moment in one's career were pushed to the back burner as women quit their jobs in search of a more self-fulfilling purpose.
xoNecole spoke to these three Black women who used the pandemic as a springboard to make their wildest dreams a reality, the lessons they learned, and posed the question of whether they’ll ever return to cubicle life.
Answers have been edited for context and length.
xoNecole: How did the pandemic lead to you leaving the cubicle?
Randi: I was becoming stagnant. I was working in mortgage and banking but I felt like my personality was too big for that job! From there, I transitioned to radio but was laid off during the pandemic. That’s what made me go full throttle with entrepreneurship.
Gabrielle: I moved around a lot for work. Five times over a span of seven years. I knew I needed a break because I had experienced so much. So, I just quit one day. Effective immediately. I didn’t know what I was going to do, I just knew I needed a break and to just regroup.
Lisa-Gaye: I was working in recruiting at a university and my dream job just kind of fell into my lap! But, I never got to fully enjoy it before the world shut down in March [2020] and I was laid off. On top of that, I was stuck in Miami because Jamaica had closed its borders due to the pandemic before I was able to return.
Randi O
xoN: Tell us about your journey after leaving Corporate America.
Randi: I do it all now! I have a podcast, I’m an on-air talent, I act, and I own a public relations company that focuses on social media engagement. It’s all from my network. When you go out and start a business, you can’t just say, “Okay I’m done with Corporate America,” and “Let me do my own thing.” If you don’t build community, if you don’t build a network it's going to be very hard to sustain.
Gabrielle: I realized in New York, there was not a lot to do for Black lesbians and queer folks. We don’t really have dedicated bars and spaces so I started doing events and it took off. I started focusing on my brand, Raw Honey. I opened a co-working space, and I was able to host an NYC Pride event in front of 100,000 people. I hit the ground running with Raw Honey. My events were all women coming to find community and come together with other lesbians and queer folks. I found my purpose in that.
Lisa-Gaye: After being laid off, I wrote out all of my passions and that’s how I came up with [my company] Shakespeare Agency. It was all of the things that I loved to do under one umbrella. The pandemic pulled that out of me. I had a very large social media following, so I pitched to hotels that I would feature them on my blog and social media. This reignited my passion for travel. I took the rest of the year to refocus my brand to focus solely on being a content creator within the travel space.
Gabrielle
xoN: What have you learned about yourself during your time as an entrepreneur?
Randi: [I learned] the importance of my network and community that I created. When I was laid off I was still keeping those relationships with people that I used to work with. So it was easy for me to transition into social media management and I didn’t have to start from scratch.
Gabrielle: The biggest thing I learned about myself was my own personal identity as a Black lesbian and how much I had assimilated into straight and corporate culture and not being myself. Now, I feel comfortable and confident being my authentic self. Now, I'm not sacrificing anything else for my career. I have a full life. I have friends. I have a social life. And when you are happy and have a full quality of life, I feel like [I] can have more longevity in my career.
Lisa-Gaye: [I'm doing] the best that I've ever done. The discipline that I’m building within myself. Nobody is saying, ‘Oh you have to be at work at this time.’ There’s no boss saying, ‘Why are you late?’ But, if I’m laying in bed at 10 a.m. then it's me saying [to myself], 'Okay, Lisa, get up, it's time for you to start working!’ That’s all on me.
xoNecole: What mistakes do you want to help people avoid when leaving Corporate America?
Randi: You have to learn about the highs and lows of entrepreneurship. You have a fast season and a slow season and I started to learn that when you're self-employed the latter season hits hard. Don't get caught up on the lows, just keep going and don't stop. I’m glad I did.
Gabrielle: I think everyone should quit their job and just figure it out for a second. You will discover so much about yourself when you take a second to just focus on you. Your skill set will always be there. You can’t be afraid of what will happen when you bet on yourself.
Lisa-Gaye: When it comes to being an influencer the field is saturated and a lot of people suffer from imposter syndrome. There is nothing wrong with being an imposter but find out how to make it yours, how to make it better. If you go to the store, you see 10 million different brands of bread! But you are choosing the brand that you like because you like that particular flavor.
So be an imposter, but be the best imposter of yourself and add your own flair, your own flavor. Make the better bread. The bread that you want.
Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
xoNecole: Will you ever return to your 9 to 5?
Randi: I wouldn’t go back to Corporate America. But I don’t mind working under someone. A lot of people try to get into this business saying, “I can't work under anyone.” That’s not necessarily the reason to start a business because you're always going to answer to somebody. Clients, brands, there’s always someone else involved.
Gabrielle: I went back! I really needed a break and I gave myself that. But, I realized I’m a corporate girl, [and] I enjoy the work that I do. I’m good at it and I really missed that side of myself. I have different sides of me and my whole identity is not Raw Honey or my queerness. A big side of me is business and that’s why I love having my career. Now I feel like my best self.
Lisa-Gaye: I really don’t. For right now, I love working for myself. It's gratifying, it's challenging, it's exciting. It’s a big deal for me to say I own my own business. That I am my own boss, and I'm a Black woman doing it.
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Featured image courtesy of Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
Originally published on February 6, 2023