Millennial Natasha Abellard $hares Why Her Finance-Inspired Animated Series Is Needed
"Money makes the world spin. Period."
It's unfortunate, but truer words have not been spoken and no one knows this better than well-respected journalist and college graduate, Natasha Abellard, who found herself living her best life, but that wasn't until coming to the realization that she was going broke.
"From college up until my early 20's, I messed up a lot. I can't count the number of times I was living paycheck to paycheck, didn't stick to my budget, used a credit card when I shouldn't have. The list goes on," the millennial shared with xoNecole.
How many of us have experienced the same problem? Ordering that extra round of drinks, knowing you'll feel regret when the check comes; or maybe you're the person that goes all out to spoil yourself but can barely afford to pay the hefty bill. Trust, we know the struggle, sis.
Courtesy of Natasha Abellard
There is nothing wrong with enjoying the moment, but like Natasha, one day you will have to come to the conclusion that if you don't get your financial priorities in order, you'll always get caught up "robbing Peter to pay Paul" and you'll never truly get to enjoy your bag.
After reading an article about how black people are destined to be broke in upcoming decades, Natasha knew that she had to make different choices in her spending.
"There was a 2017 piece in Fortune that reported that a median black family only had about $1,700 in wealth, but on the flip side, median household wealth for white families is $116,800. That's a major divide. The goal is to spread information that will in time help close that gap."
Finally beginning to get a grip on her finances, Natasha paired with Anthony Copeman to help educate young black millennials on how to hold on to their dollars with their YouTube series, $hares, which are short shows based around four relatable characters:
Courtesy of $harestv
Essence is a girl who comes from a financially stable family. Troi is loosely based on Natasha who comes from an immigrant family. Michael is a 20-something who decided not to attend college and finally Brandon, who also comes from an immigrant family, works as an IT professional and lives at home with his parents.
"Whenever someone buys a piece of a company's stock, they are purchasing a share of that company-- a shareholder," Natasha shared about the inspiration for the series. "So, the idea is that when people share their experiences with money, they take ownership of their individual financial situations. Our characters share the wealth by being open about their own experiences... Knowledge is power. If people have an avenue that will provide them with the necessary information, they'll do better."
So, how do you remedy the pattern of bad spending? According to Natasha, it's all about getting disciplined and making a financial blueprint that's realistic. "It's not easy to do. But it's not impossible. You just gotta wake up one day and decide you want a change."
And it all starts with learning early.
"My dad started teaching me pretty early. Though I still messed up a lot, I did have somewhat of a foundation," Natasha shared. "I just had my first son and I know that his first lesson will be about money. If I knew some of what I knew now at 18 years old, I'd be better off financially. The first thing my father ever taught me was the importance of saving and it helped me in the long run. I would recommend that as a simple introduction to money between parents and their young children."
Courtesy of Natasha Abellard
As for her last words for fellow Black millennials? "We are the next generation and we need to break the cycles. No one wants to be broke."
Natasha also has these lifestyle tips for xoNecole that will not only help WOC get on the path of cash, but also feel financially empowered!
Take Inventory, Then Act
GiphyTake the time to regularly check your bank statements for patterns of overspending or foolish spending. "Every month, I'd run down my statement to see what I may have unnecessarily bought. For a while, it was Starbucks. So I was able to cut down on that and saw a major difference in my funds."
Save Those Coins, Sis
Don't be afraid to buy the off-brand product. There's no shame in getting that Fashion Nova brand. "Look for cheaper alternatives to things you love but aren't always in your best interest financially."
DIY Is A Girl's Best Friend
GiphyKnow that there is nothing wrong with DIY because it will save you money in the long run. "Sometimes try saving money by doing it yourself which includes, hair, nails, facials, and more." Not only will you save money but you may realize that you have a skill or talent that also makes cash!
Secure A Bag For A Rainy Day
ALWAYS have an emergency fund! This money is not to buy those Gucci shoes on sale. Don't do it, girl! This money is reserved for paying rent if you lose your job, etc. You get the point.
This is very sound advice that we can all start using right away. So let's get to securing our bags and holding tight to our coins!
To learn more about Natasha and catch up on the latest $hares episodes, follow the squad on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTube.
Related Articles:
5 Resources That'll Help You Get Your Coins All the Way Together - Read More
Our Top 5 Business Podcasts For Millennial Women of Color - Read More
I Paid Off $40,000 Of Debt In 18 Months: Here's How - Read More
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LISTÂ HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:Â Â
​Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
​Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
​Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
Momo Productions/Getty
Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Courtney Hale/Getty Images