Quantcast
It's Not You, It's Me: 4 Things Keeping You From Bae

It's Not You, It's Me: 4 Things Keeping You From Bae

Are Bad Dating Habits Keeping You Single?

Dating

Having a desire to date and having the ability to do so (successfully), are two entirely different things. At least, this is what I'm finding for myself and the ton of baggage that comes with my desire to date.


This is a mind f*ck to me because each time I think I've checked my full-size luggage worth of sh*t and feel that I may be in a productive place, it's like a bad episode of Punk'd. "Gotcha B*tch...not today," is what Ashton Kutcher would say in this wild ass episode.

media.giphy.com

My desire and willingness to have a romantic life are not necessarily one and the same; that is the other thing I'm learning. Although externally I have the willingness piece to this down pat, I'm not so sure my subconscious feels the same level of readiness. What I will disclose is this: there has been some level of growth because prior to this time in my life, I wouldn't have the awareness to catch myself. But now I can say without a doubt, "It's me, not you." I've gained so much wisdom in the two years it's been since I dated; enough to know that in the past, I let a few good catches slip away due to my own shittiness and inability to hold myself accountable.

For so many years, I've been pushing potential baes away and I've never been called out on it because I could always make it pretty and justifiable (one guy actually licked the plate at the restaurant), but in some cases there was no real probable cause. In fact, I have only concluded that these four reasons are undeniably why I'm my own worst enemy when it comes to finding someone I can cuff. By me, I mean us ladies because I'm positive that I'm not alone.

Stingy About Your Time.

media.giphy.com

I know people like to say be mindful of who you give your time and energy to – this is true. But of that same token, my rule of thumb for any and everyone in my life is "you make time for what you choose to make time for." That shouldn't be any different for me, but I like to make an exception for myself. I find myself cutting conversations short and limiting quality time to whenever I'm bored enough to be bothered.

Featured image by Getty Images

Next Page
stop-trying-to-change-your-partner

You ever go into a dating experience like, 'He’s great, but he needs to work on XYZ,' and before you know it, you're over his head every second you can get to remind him to work on that same 'XYZ?' Yes? Well, perfect because this article is for my lovely fixers; it’s time to dive deep into learning to discern better potential long-term partners for you!

Keep reading...Show less
The daily empowerment fix you need.
Make things inbox official.
This Couple Once Broke Up Over Money And Now They've Made It Their Mission To Teach Others About Building Wealth

Julien and Kiersten Saunders met in 2012 while working for the same company and they quickly fell for one another. However, their whirlwind romance was cut short following an extravagant vacation. When they got home from Panama, reality set in, and they were forced to have a tough conversation about money after they both had different opinions on recouping the money spent on the vacation.

Keep reading...Show less
Five Things To Know Before Becoming A Dog Mom

This post is in partnership with Blue Buffalo.

So you’re thinking about becoming a dog mom? We love that for you! Having a happy, furry friend to greet you at the door each day, cuddle up on the couch with, and keep you in touch with the great outdoors is one of life’s greatest joys. And that’s before we get into all the cute puppy outfits there are to buy! But there are some key and non-negotiable things to know and consider before saying yes to bringing home a fur baby.

Keep reading...Show less
sagittarius-season-december-2022-monthly-horoscopes

December is a powerful month for the world and a month where love, power, and connection are all coming together as one. With the Astrological transits that are happening this month, true gifts are appearing to tap in to, and the possibilities are truly endless right now. Sagittarius Season is always a time when there is more hope and excitement in the air, and December is no different. There are a lot of opportunities this month if you open your heart to receiving them.

Keep reading...Show less
Here's The Real-Life Story Behind Netflix's 'From Scratch'

If you’ve recently heard the loud sobbing of women across social media, you can thank Netflix’s new romantic drama From Scratch for that. The series, based loosely on the memoir of the same name, which was written by Tembi Locke, centers on the story of a Black woman named Amy (Zoe Saldaña) who leaves behind her life and budding law career to move to Italy to study art. While there, she meets a local professional chef named Lino, and the two begin a romance that brings together two different cultures.

Keep reading...Show less
Exclusive Interviews
Latest Posts