Tina Knowles Talks Failed Marriage, Self-Esteem Issues, And Finding Love At Age 59
Beyoncé must get being private from her mama because people hardly know anything about Tina Knowles' personal life other than the fact that she birthed two singers, owned a hair salon, and was Destiny's Child's personal designer.
That was until she recently delivered a speech where she opened up about her journey from being a 5-year-old warrior who was mistreated in school, to finding her passion as a hairstylist and later, clothing designer. She also dished on how her marriage became really bad after she got pregnant with Beyoncé, how she almost lost herself, and after pressing reset on her life in her 50s, she is finally the happiest she's been in a long time.
Tina has been through some mess in her 60+ years of living y'all!
Catch these 10 things you probably didn't know about her below.
1) She was treated horribly in Catholic school:
The nuns picked on us a lot, my family. I didn't understand at the time but my mom did the altar cloths. She did the altar boys' uniforms. She worked for the nuns. My dad chauffeured the nuns around. My brothers cleaned the school yard. And I often wondered why we were indentured servants to the church. And the nuns were very hard on me. They would always say, 'You really don't belong here. If you only knew, you'd be very grateful to be here. You've got a rebellious spirit. We need to take down that spirit and control it.'
It was always these things to kinda put me in my place. What I found out late was that my parents were bartering so I can go.
I became a warrior at five. I refused to let them take my spirit.
2) She used be a makeup artist and even modeled at one point.
I didn't know what I wanted to be [after school]. I just knew I wanted to get out of Galveston [Texas] and I wanted to do something related to beauty. Something about making women feel good about themselves. So I went to California and I actually got a job as a makeup artist for a Japanese company, which was really funny because everyone was Japanese but me. I went on to work at Worldwide Health Studio and I worked there for three years. I lived in Denver. I did a little modeling. I learned how to walk in heels.
3) She got married, lost her mother, nearly lost her father and became pregnant within the span of a year.
I met my husband [Mathew Knowles] and got married. I was so excited about my dad walking me down the aisle and he had a heart attack the day before we got married. He had a minor heart attack. So we all went to the hospital after the wedding and brought the wedding party and he was rushing us out and we left.
And the next day we're supposed to go to the honeymoon but we missed the flight. So I called back and they said, 'Oh your dad's in intensive care, he's had a massive heart attack.' My dad was really bad and I decided to stay so my ex-husband could go back to the house because his parents were in town. And he calls me crying and he says his grandfather has died.
By Wednesday, my daddy is stable enough so I can go to [my husband's grandfather's] funeral. So I go to the funeral on Thursday and when I got back on Friday, my mom was in intensive care. It was really a tough time. I have to say my ex-husband said, 'You know, you don't have to work. You can go and take care of your parents,' which I treasure to this day because within six months my mom had passed away. Then I was pregnant!
4) She opened her hair salon as a way to be independent, especially since her marriage had gotten bad and she promised to never give up on herself.
For four years I didn't work, I just kept my daughter. And then things just got really rocky and my marriage got very tumultuous and I was having all these problems and I was like, "'What have I done? I've been out of the job market for four years.' Self-esteem low, so what do I do now? During that time, I had started beauty school and I had maybe three months to last with that.
But after I got pregnant, my marriage just got really bad and I knew I had to do something. So I got very focused on going to school. And by the time I had the baby, I already had a clientele. I built a salon at my house and I'd do hair there.
Eight weeks after I had my baby, I took her to her paternal grandmother and I said, 'Listen, you gotta keep her 'cause I gotta open up a business,' because I would never be in this position again. I would never be totally dependent on someone. I would never give up on myself.
[Tweet "I would never be totally dependent on someone. I would never give up on myself."]
5) She caused Destiny's Child [then known as Destiny] to lose their first record deal.
The first deal that they [Destiny's Child] had, I was the first person to open my big mouth to the people that signed them. The guy told me, "'Well, this is going to change their lives and you should stop being so square. You should stop being so protective, and get with it.' Because they were actually exposing the girls to things that I just didn't feel were appropriate for them to be so young.
Well he ended up telling me to get out of his office, take the kids home and don't bring them back. So I'm devastated because I have to go and tell these kids I messed up their deal. So I end up doing that and God just showed up because in three months, they got a way bigger, better deal.
6) She suffered from low self-esteem after filing for divorce at age 58, after being married for 33 years.
I was very sad. When you look at someone else, you look at them and say, 'They're attractive. They have a lot of good stuff going on for them. They have no right to have low self-esteem. They have no right to feel sorry for themselves.' Well, it doesn't matter who you are, what you are, what you've done, what you have. You're a person; you're a human being. And when something strikes you like that, it takes the breath out of you. And my fight came back! After a while, I let myself feel sorry for myself for a minute and then I said, 'You know, I'm so blessed to have all the opportunities that I have. And I don't have the right to feel sorry.' I started telling myself this.
7) She took some much-needed time off for herself after the divorce to live and enjoy life.
I started reading my art books. I love art but I had never had the time. I started traveling. I would travel with my daughter [Beyoncé] but not to work! I would say, 'No I'm not working.' I had my girlfriend who would make me laugh. I sent for her and she would come on the road and we would go to museums, we would go to lunch and we would just laugh. And I just really had forgotten how to live.
I had just lost all of myself so I realize now that part of the low self-esteem was, yes, being 58 and having to start over again, and the other part is that I just lost myself. That I was so busy working and going and taking care of everybody else that I just forgot about Tina.
So I would tell my kids, 'You know what, you can call me and I'll be there if it's something important, but otherwise, I'm taking care of Tina. This is my selfish moment.' And before I knew it, I started liking me again! I started being important, not everybody else.
[Tweet "I started being important, not everybody else."]
8) She didn't think she could find love again at 59 years old.
The whole thing about dating was the scariest thing in the world! I would tell my friends, 'Where am I gonna find somebody at 59 years old? Where do you meet men? Where do you get them? And they're all gone.' It was really funny so I just focused on myself.
Finally, a girl that worked with me said, 'This guy I know wants to take you out. He just thinks you're hot!' And I'm like, 'Really?!' So she said, 'Yes!'
My kids got me ready, and I changed clothes five times. I didn't want to be too this and too that.
Well, I went out with the guy and he was a very, very nice man and thank God he wasn't my type because I wasn't as nervous once I met him. So I was like, 'You know what, this is just like friend time.' But it was so good for my self-esteem to have somebody to say, 'You look nice!' To give me a flower, to take me out. So I went out on a couple of dates with him but I knew he wasn't the one. But it got me past that [point in my life.]
9) Even though she didn't want Mathew Knowles back it still hurt her when he got remarried.
I hear that my ex-husband is getting married. Now this is my family. My ex-husband is my family. I don't want to get back into that at all, that's not what I want. But it still hurts a little bit, right? It's still a blow to your ego. So I call my crazy friend Monica to take care of me the week of the wedding.
[...] She comes to LA and she says, 'Tina, you gotta get out ..let's go out! Let's go see some men!' and I was like, 'I don't know where to find 'em!'
10) She was friends with her husband, actor Richard Lawson, for 33 years before they began dating.
I been knowing him for 33 years. His sister was one of my best friends, and she died of breast cancer 20 years ago. Some of you might remember him as the handsome guy who was on Dynasty, and he was an actor and he was on All My Children. I brought him down [to Texas] one time, and the women went crazy over him. He's an old friend, like family.
So Monica called him up and we went by his acting school and he took us out to eat afterwards and my friend says, 'Okay Richard! Do you know any men?!' And he's like, 'Well, what she looking for?' So I say, 'You know, I want somebody with integrity, that
believes in God, that likes to dance, likes to have fun and appreciates art.' And he's like, 'Oh! What about me?' And we both say, 'Hell no!' So he says, 'Okay, well, I'll see who I can think of.'
So the next night he took us out dancing and we just had a good time. The next night he came to the concert and he said, 'Can we just get away from Monica? 'Cause Monica just takes over the conversation.' So we went to lunch and he said, 'I want to support you during this time,' because Mathew -- he's friends with Mathew, too -- just got married yesterday. So he came to Houston, I went to LA afterwards. And I'm in my happiest I been in a long, long time.
She also added a very important lesson:
I just have to say that, most of the times in my life that things have been the toughest and the worst and I thought I would die and not get through them, they turned out to be the best times. If you are going through it, just know it's called 'going through it,' you're not going to get stuck there, you are not going to die, you are going to survive. My daughter wrote a song called 'Survivor' some years ago and it's my favorite song by them because it says, 'When the times get bad, I'm going to work harder. I'm going to keep pushing and I'm going to keep positive and make it happen because I'm a survivor.' That's been the story of my life.[Tweet "If you're going through it, it's called 'going through it,' you're not going to get stuck there"]
Watch the speech below:
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Fall Equinox: How To Make The Fall Your Season, According To Your Sign
The Fall Equinox begins on September 23, 2023, and it’s time to embrace abundance, gain clarity, and know that you are worthy of your desires. The Fall Equinox marks the beginning of fall and the end of summer and is a turning point of the year, where things settle in and come to fruition. The energy that fall brings is one of harvest, but it is also one of release, letting go, and finding your ground. Coming from a summer of intensity, drama in love, and overall moving through a space of deep spiritual growth- now that fall is here, we are ready to decompress, dream, and enjoy that which we have created for ourselves.
What Is the Energy of the Fall Equinox 2023?
The energy this fall is opening up new doors of abundance and is a time of reaping your rewards in life. Fall begins at the same time as Libra Season, and a lot of these blessings have to do with love and the relationship developments that will be taking place over the next few months. With a New Moon Solar Eclipse in Libra occurring a few weeks after fall begins on October 14th, something enchanting is happening in romance right now. The scales are coming into balance, new beginnings are occurring, and clarity prevails.
Relationships over the next few months are about focusing on the gifts and gratitude you find in them and accepting where things need to change as well.
By the time winter begins, most of the planets that are currently in retrograde will be direct, and this signifies the change of pace that fall is bringing. This fall highlights Eclipse Season overall, and the Full Moon Lunar Eclipse in Taurus on October 28th will be a time of creating boundaries, honoring your values and energy, and closing a chapter in your life that doesn’t align. Financial worlds are growing and finding new ground, but with Jupiter still in retrograde in Taurus until December 30th, patience is needed here.
Over the next few months, give yourself the space to gain some new perspectives, make room for love, and grow in abundance.
ARIES
Your guidance this fall is to take those first steps toward the goals you have been pondering over this year. There is a Full Moon in your sign a week after fall begins, and you get the opportunity to enter this season with less baggage and more closure. You will possibly be starting a new position or working in a new field, and you need all the good energy to back you right now. Know that you can count on your skills and talents to move you further in life and that help will be there when you least expect it. This is a fall of abundance for you, Aries, claim it.
Your lucky days this fall are: Sep. 29, Oct. 13, Nov. 13, Nov. 21
TAURUS
Patience, patience, patience, Taurus. You are creating something beautiful in the world right now, and the time it’s taken to get you here will all be worthwhile. Your guidance this fall is to nurture your world and your dreams and to bring more love and compassion to your life. You are preparing for a new reality but need some more time to dream it up and define that which you want for yourself and your future. The Full Lunar Eclipse happening this fall is occurring in your sign, and you are moving through some major closures in your life right now. This is a creative time for you, Taurus.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 28, Oct. 29, Nov. 6, Nov. 20
GEMINI
This fall is all about taking care of yourself and valuing your time and energy, Gemini. The way you see yourself and your life are coming up for review right now, and you are being urged to look at yourself in a better light. Your ruling planet, Mercury, goes retrograde for the last time this year on December 13th, just before fall ends, and this time is all about taking what you have learned and choosing better for yourself. You may be tested to be more confident or true to yourself right now and over the next few months, and it’s about owning your part in this life and standing up for what you want.
Your lucky days this fall are: Sep. 25, Oct. 21, Nov. 20, Dec. 12
CANCER
This is an abundant fall for you, Cancer. You have worked diligently on claiming the opportunities and new doors that have been opening for you, and you are feeling free to be your successful self. You are encouraged in your independence right now, and you have proven to yourself just how talented you are and how much you have grown. No major aspects are happening in your sign this fall, giving you the space to breathe, create, and receive your rewards. Happiness fills your world, and even though you still feel like you are just getting started in a sense, that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the gifts that are presenting themselves today.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 13, Oct. 15, Nov. 12, Nov. 13
LEO
This fall is a turning point for you in love, Leo. New developments are taking place in your relationships, and you are being received especially favorably. This is the time to open your heart to growth and new possibilities and to get creative with what you are looking for right now. The Last Quarter Moon happening in your sign on November 5th will be a turning point for you this fall. Your unique charm and charisma are enough, and you attract many to you through your natural energy and love for life. Your ship is coming in this fall, and your heart is fulfilled.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 1, Oct. 31, Nov. 5, Nov. 14
VIRGO
Virgo, this fall is a blessing for the heart space. You are feeling in tune emotionally, and there is positive energy coming your way and into your love life. You have spent a lot of this year healing, forgiving, and finding your voice, and over the next few months, you will be creating the spaces you have been looking to enter in your life. Venus enters your sign for a month on October 8th, and there are some pleasant surprises in store for you during this time. Fresh starts are coming in for you, and spiritually, you are awakening to the gifts within you and in your heart. Your beauty is showing, and love is coming in for you this fall.
Your lucky days this fall are: Sep. 25, Oct. 22, Nov. 5, Nov. 20
LIBRA
This fall is a new beginning for your financial world, Libra. Autumn begins the same day Libra Season does, and you have some extra motivation and energy within you right now. You are ready to put the action behind the intentions you have been setting for yourself financially, and this is a time of plans coming together and falling through to success. The more you stay focused and diligent, the more opportunities that can come for you right now. The first month of fall, the Sun is in your sign, and this is really the time to get things moving in your life, especially with a New Moon Eclipse in Libra on October 14th happening as well.
Your lucky days this fall are: Sep. 27, Oct. 14, Oct. 30, Nov. 20
SCORPIO
It’s all about the vision for you right now, Scorpio. You are focused on the future, your path ahead, and manifesting your dreams, and there is something passionate about the next few months for you. You may be taking some risks this fall as you test the boundaries on how far you want to go with something and what worlds are opening up to you now. Mars is in your sign from October 12th until November 24th, and life is exciting for you right now. You have your eyes on the prize and are ready to move forward toward the things that are lighting you up right now.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 12, Oct. 13, Nov. 6, Nov. 13,
SAGITTARIUS
This fall is about taking a leap of faith, Sagittarius. Your guidance over the next few months is to do the things that you would do if you knew you would be supported in doing them. Less self-doubt is needed now, as you are walking on new ground. You are moving towards personal healing you have been wary of from the beginning, and you are ready to let go of some energy that has been holding you back. Trust that once you decide on something, the universe instantly begins to make it happen for you. Your season begins on November 22nd, and it’s time to put yourself first more. Have courage in yourself this fall.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 8, Nov. 22, Nov. 24, Dec. 12
CAPRICORN
This fall is all about clarity for you, Capricorn. You are a wise soul, and you are owning this energy about yourself right now. Over the next few months, you will be developing spiritually, helping those who need your sound advice, and evolving in life. You have found a new sense of enlightenment and are enjoying the clear perspective that has been gained. Mercury goes retrograde in your sign on December 13th, right before fall ends, and this is when you will be feeling more tested to take the lead in your life and use your voice. Overall, fall 2023 is your time to surrender to the good within you and in your life, Capricorn.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 10, Oct. 23, Nov. 4, Dec. 1
AQUARIUS
Things are moving fast for you this fall, Aquarius. This is a successful, harmonious, and passionate time for you, as many opportunities come your way at once. It will be hard to settle down with all the energy flowing through your life over the next few months, as you have so much to do and so many people to see. Overall, however, this is positive energy that you have been looking forward to in your life, and everything is coming together and moving forward where it was once stagnant. Fall is giving you the closure and the opportunity to reinvent yourself and start on new, solid ground in your life.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 30, Oct. 31, Nov. 20, Nov. 28
PISCES
Your guidance for fall is to have balance in your life. There is a lot of new coming in for you, but you are also working on letting go of what has fallen. You have grown in many ways this year, and financially, you have seen growth as well but may be feeling the weight of responsibilities this has come with now. To move through this season with the most grace, give yourself more time to rest, to be, and allow things to fall into place on their own. Saturn has been retrograde in your sign since June and goes direct this fall on November 4th, Pisces. This is your opportunity to see things more clearly, protect your energy, and feel more in tune with your internal guidance system.
Your lucky days this fall are: Oct. 22, Nov. 4, Nov. 6, Dec. 12
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