What's The Worse That Could Happen: Ciara Sues Future For $15 Million
Just when you thought that Dwight Howard's ongoing legal battle with Royce Reed, which included a $9.2 million dollar lawsuit and repossession of her bank accounts and car, were the worst that could happen while co-parenting: in walks Ciara and Future.
This week, things went from bad to absolute worse between the former couple as Ciara filed a $15 million lawsuit claiming that Future is spreading lies about her in an attempt to ruin her career. She's also asking for an additional $250,000 in legal fees, and an order prohibiting him mentioning their son's name in the press.
Ouch!
Related: 7 Lessons We Can Learn From Ciara And Future's Parenting Fail
Ever since their public breakup following the birth of their son, we've seen their rocky co-parenting relationship tank, and it's been hard to watch. After keeping silent on their breakup amidst cheating rumors, Future broke his silence in a series of media interviews.
Well, it was more like a "Speak My Truth Tour," because the rapper was spilling all kinds of dirty tea about his ex-fianceé to nearly any interviewer who asked.
Like his infamous Huff Post Live chat, where he told Marc Lamont Hill that he felt "embarrassed" for Ciara after she covered Brides Magazine, even though they had already broken up.
We sat down and talked about it because we were like best friends and I told her how I felt. She was like, ‘Nah, I just took pictures.’ With the bridal thing… So it was like more of embarrassment and I felt embarrassed for her because you love someone you don’t want them to feel uncomfortable. And I was like I didn’t ever tell the media that we had called off the engagement and then when it started coming out, everybody assumed it was because of cheating. She never did an interview saying I cheated. I never did an interview saying I cheated.
Then he told The Breakfast Club in a separate interview that he wasn't feeling her new boo, Seattle Seahawks QB Russell Wilson, being pictured pushing his son in a stroller. In fact, he didn't want Russell taking pics with his son at all.
"That's the number 1 rule. If I was a kid and my mama had a dude pushing me, I would have jumped out the stroller and slapped the sh*t out of him...You never do that in our community. You never even bring a man around your son. Like you don't even know this dude but for a few months and you bringing him around your son. Who does that? Nobody does that.""I'm not for the publicity stunts. Leave my son out of all the publicity stunts. Just leave him out of the relationship. Because we don't need your relationship for anything. I can take care of him on my own without any help. I don't need no help taking care of my son."
Ciara was pretty mum about her ex-fiance's media remarks, but she reportedly reached the end of her rope when he tweeted that she was keeping their son from him.
Why she's remained quiet about Future's remarks now makes total sense - she was collecting her receipts, and all of the details he disclosed in his interviews were listed in her suit.
Ciara says that Future's tattle-telling has ruined her reputation and is impacting her potential professional opportunities, which ultimately impacts the son they co-parent together.
Ciara also says in her suit that Future has not paid her his ordered $15,000 per month in child support since Baby Future's birth, and that his tweets casted her in a "negative and disparaging light." Especially when it comes to visitation, where she says that she's made their son available to him in whichever city they are both in at the same time, and on 19 different visitations (some spanning over the course of several days) since December 2014.
Ci's legal team even went as far as contacting Future's lawyers asking him for a retraction of his Tweets vilifying her as a mother, and an apology. Future has not responded, and no apology has been issued. In fact, as of press time, he hasn't responded to the lawsuit either.
What's sad about watching this tea spill in the public eye is that the most important person impacted by it is the one who suffers the most, and that's Baby Future. He's a little guy right now, so he doesn't understand what's happening. But young kids see things through Gods eyes, and while there is a lot they don't understand, they know when their parents are being less than cordial and hateful toward one another. That can hurt any child.
While Ciara and Future were at odds, Nick Cannon was building a successful co-parenting relationship following his divorce from Mariah Carey. He was able to share his lessons on a visit to The Ellen Show, where he chatted about how he was able to get through spending Thanksgiving with his children and Mariah, even though she had a new boyfriend. He told Ellen,
“It’s all about unconditional love...And knowing because they were so young, this is what they know: They know Mommy and Daddy still love each other, but more importantly they love us.”
He also told People that it was important for he and Mariah to remember that "family comes first" no matter what, and that was the key to their successful co-parenting relationship.
“...Just staying focused and putting priorities in order...Being able to just step out and control whatever you can control, and the things that you can’t, you just keep it moving."At the end of the day, that's what it's all about....You celebrate one another and celebrate family – you take time out for those moments."
Hopefully Ciara and Future can take some notes from Mariah and Nick, so that their most important asset does not miss out on valuable and precious moments with the two most important people in his life.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Between the rise of the creator economy and the gig economy, the window of opportunity to leverage your creativity for long-term gain has never been more potent.
For the last four years, I’ve worked as a full-time freelance writer and content creator. A year into this journey, I knew that if I wanted to create a sense of structure around my life outside of a traditional 9-5, I would have to create it.
To my surprise, that came in the form of social media.
Now, you might be wondering how someone might be able to juggle their work in a creatively-dominant career like writing while still having the mental capacity to produce ideas for their own personal brand, and well, that answer didn’t come easily.
In 2021, I hit a wall with writing and content creation.
With the stress and uncertainty that came as a result of the pandemic, to being burned out from having to live off my creativity, I reached a breaking point. For me, writing was always a space to explore my thoughts, process heavy topics, and express concepts that only words could bring reason to. However, when I didn’t have the brainpower to write or create content, I knew it was time to set parameters around my hobby of content creation and my passion for storytelling.
In this case, the biggest challenge was finding the balance between the two by releasing the guilt and shame of taking a break from both in order to reconnect with them.
Through years of trial and error, the fog finally cleared, and I was able to hit my stride in 2023. From garnering over 10K followers on TikTok, building an Instagram community around lifestyle and creative encouragement, along with my wellness collective, Black Girl Playground, and writing for xoNecole as a lifestyle contributor, the creative juices have been flowing steadily.
And it all happened by creating a strategy that allowed space for planning, resting, and creating. Today, I’ll be sharing my top tips to help you find your balance between your side hustle and passions.
On staying inspired and motivated when working on various content creation and freelancing projects:
Early this year, I came to the bright conclusion that I needed to shorten the gap between ideation and execution — and it completely changed how I create.
Oftentimes, when we have an idea come to us, we let it sit for too long, and then before we know it, we’ve either lost the enthusiasm to put it into action, or someone else grabs it. If you want to stay in a flow of creativity, whether side projects or full-time work, it’s important to not get slowed down by self-doubt, procrastination, or perfectionism.
Give yourself permission to act on your ideas as they come to you. Even if they’re a little muddy or not “perfect,” you can always fine-tune them later.
@yagirlaley shrinking the gap between [ideation] + [execution] 🧠💡#fyp #creativeadvice
On the importance of choosing a niche:
If there’s one thing that has helped me balance my work as a writer and content creator, it’s putting each in its own niche (or category). By definition, a niche is a specialized segment of the market or a specific area of expertise.
When you are creating in the same niche that you’re also making a living in, that’s an easy way to get your wires crossed. And at times, this could lead to feeling as if you don’t have any ideas for yourself because you’ve given them to the other area you're juggling.
When balancing two, you want to have enough fresh ideas to give to your personal projects and your full-time work to avoid any overlap. This ensures that your personal creative vision isn’t compromised when working on client projects while still having some for yourself.
On the strategies that have helped to maintain a consistent workflow in both areas:
I can’t stress enough how important it is to create a workflow and structure for yourself as a freelancer — this applies to those with a 9-5 in the day and a 5-9 at night, too.
As someone who admittedly has ADHD tendencies, object permanence can sometimes create a block in time and project management. That’s why I encourage creatives and professionals to create systems that allow you to see the work that’s ahead of you.
Personally, I can’t live without having multiple calendars going at once. My Google calendar keeps track of interviews for articles and events, while my physical calendar helps me keep track of important dates. I also work out of an Excel sheet where I can log in ongoing stories and track their status from drafting to submission. I’ve also heard great things about the Notion app for planning and tracking.
When it comes to creating content, spending time doing bulk content days has been an asset to my creative workflow. When I complete the videos, I save them to my drafts and upload them as needed.
Credit: Amberita
Courtesy of the writer
On the best advice for someone who is considering pursuing both content creation and freelancing simultaneously:
Don’t be ashamed of taking a break and resting — because both are essential to the life of a creative. Last month, I returned to Instagram after taking 6 months off from posting. During that time, I worked on growing my TikTok page, using the platform to practice vulnerability and allowing myself to put the fun back into creating content. Without the time, I can’t say I’d be able to approach Instagram with the same ease and playfulness; but thanks to that time away, it was possible.
Resting, letting our minds wander, or simply doing nothing are all just as productive as creating. No one can produce at all times, we have to allow ourselves the space for new concepts and ideas to flow to us. In addition to that, when we take breaks from social media, it allows us to stop the wheel of comparison and consume more than we create. So if you feel like you’re in a creative rut with all you want to balance, it may be time to take a step back, unapologetically.
Your creativity will thank you for it.
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Featured image by Sir Taylor