Should You Clean Your Man's House? Amara La Negra Thinks So
"A woman's place is in the kitchen," they say. Well, tell that to the women running Fortune 500 businesses and building billion dollar empires.
Millennial women of color have become increasingly visible in the corporate world and have relentlessly persisted toward securing a position on the economic playing field, but this fact has caused a significant shift in gender roles.
We are now confronting the ideological confines that society has set in the name of sexism and gender identity, and seek to create new paradigms about what it means to be a woman. Our femininity no longer rests on our ability to keep house.
Despite our race to equality and fight to eliminate these stereotypes, some women still feel that it is a woman's place to cook, clean, and make sure a man's drawers are washed to perfection. It's this type of thinking that earned Love and Hip Hop: Miamistar, Amara La Negra, a whirlwind of backlash from her online audience.
Amara La Negra's Instagram
Recently, the entertainer posted a photo on Instagram that showed her in a bodycon dress cleaning the shower with the caption:
"A man's house is a reflection of the woman he's with. Food for thought. Being pretty is just a bonus with me."
The post even prompted a hilarious challenge that led women and men to upload ridiculous photos of themselves cleaning their showers with unlikely household items with the previously mentioned caption and the hashtag #CleanYourMansHouseChallenge.
It's 2018 and many women still believe that it is a woman's "duty" to take care of the home. But that doesn't mean that line of thinking is right.
The first time I moved in with a partner was rough to say the least, but what was even harder, was living up to his grandmother's expectations. She was an older German woman, and the first real example I had ever seen of a homemaker. There was never any dust in her home, coffee was always made in the morning, lunches were made immediately after, and despite how many people she took care of, there were never any dishes in the sink. When i would offer to help, she would gleefully decline, letting me know that she likes to do it.
I was baffled, I had never seen anything like it. My mother had earned three degrees by the time I was born, and got pregnant with me while pursuing her fourth. Even after going into labor, as soon as she was able, she was back to work. My father took care of most of the housework, and I had grown up to see these chores as more of a shared responsibility rather than a dynamic that was indicative of any gender roles.
When I got older and moved in with my own partner, we reflected the same dynamic. This was to the dismay of his grandmother of course, who frowned when she found dust at the top of my laundry room door and didn't feel like my kitchen floor had been mopped to capacity. She would mention tips and tricks that would help me keep a cleaner house, constantly reiterating that it was my responsibility to maintain the home we shared.
Over time, I became pressed to impress her. I spent days cleaning our apartment before she came to visit, only for her to criticize what I hadn't done. It made me feel inadequate as a partner and a lover. Even though we both had jobs, and I was also finishing up my degree, somehow in her eyes, it was solely my responsibility to keep house.
And let me tell you something ladies and gentleman, that's bullsh-t.
We no longer live in a time where a woman should be expected to cook, clean, and have sex like a pornstar to be considered a worthy partner. I'm sorry Amara, but a man's house is not a reflection of me. It may be a reflection of our dynamic and ability to delegate chores, but the cleanliness of my man's home is not a reflection of me as a lover or a life partner, because I'm not his maid.
Women have jobs, dreams, and aspirations, just like men do. So if I need you to wash the dishes tonight homeboy, you're going to have to make that happen. A relationship is about shared responsibility, and can be stifled by age-old theories about gender if you allow it to.
Every woman should be equipped with homemaking qualities and abilities, there's no doubt about that, but so should men. I want a man that can cook and clean too, damnit. After all, he's not the only one bringing home the bacon.
What do you think? Are you with Amara, do you think the dynamic should be shared between partners, or both? Let us know in the comments down below.
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
Feature image courtesy
Actor Jessie T. Usher reveals his secrets for maintaining his physical appearance while filming Amazon Prime's The Boys.
The series, which spans four seasons, follows vigilantes as they battle corrupt superheroes. In The Boys, Usher portrays Reggie Franklin, also known as A-Train, a superhero with incredible speed.
During a recent Men's Health magazine interview, the 32-year-old spoke about his diet and workout regimens. These routines help Usher stay in shape for the show's stunt work, which involves intense cardio to match his character's super-speed abilities.
In the discussion, he revealed his workout regimen consists of resistance training and cardio. On rest days, the Shaft star incorporates yoga and stretching into his routine.Jessie On What He Eats In a Day
Regarding his diet, Usher shared he typically eats three meals daily with minimal variations. He begins each day by hydrating and waiting an hour or two before breakfast. On production days for The Boys, Usher opts for eggs with herbs and seasonings, accompanied by fruit.
The Dangerous Lies actor keeps it light for lunch with protein-rich options like quinoa bowls or salads with lentils, chicken, and vegetables from CAVA. Dinner is his heartiest meal, featuring chicken and fish (particularly sea bass or salmon), after which he refrains from eating for the rest of the night.
Usher focuses on protein intake for all his meals rather than counting macro calories to support muscle growth. He boosts his protein with peanut butter shakes. While maintaining a disciplined diet, The Almost Christmas star allows himself occasional indulgences like Funyuns or Nutter Butters. To round out his health regimen, Usher takes daily vitamins.
Jessie On His Diet And Workout Routine For "The Boys"
When asked about adjusting his diet or workout routine for his role in The Boys, Usher explained that his health-conscious lifestyle eliminates the need for significant changes.
“Honestly, no. Because by the time I got to The Boys I was already health conscious. Very much aware of what I was putting in my body and how,” he said.
Regarding his workouts, Usher revealed he tailors his routines to include more diverse cardio exercises. This approach ensures he's physically prepared for the scenes he shoots for the show.
“A day of working out for The Boys is a little bit different. I feel like I added more variations of cardio work,” he stated. “When [you’re shooting] you just have no idea what they’re about to throw at you. I just want to be ready for all of those challenges, especially the cardio things. I just wanted to have the endurance to be able to get through whatever type of scene that I would possibly be shooting.”
Season four of The Boys is now streaming on Amazon Prime.
Everything ‘The Boys’ Star Jessie T Usher Eats In a Day | Eat Like | Men's Health
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Feature image by Phillip Faraone/Getty Images for Paramount Pictures