Normani Talks Letting Go Of The Need To Be Perfect & The Heartbreak Behind "Fair"
Normani has been in the music industry since she was a teenager as a part of the girl group Fifth Harmony. But since their split, the 25-year-old singer has been working hard to prove that she can make it as a solo act.
She released “Motivation” in 2019 with a memorable video that paid tribute to her favorite artists growing up and in that same year she teamed up with Sam Smith for “Dancing with a Stranger.” In 2021, she released the head-bobbing slow jam “Wild Side” featuring Cardi B and shut down the 2021 VMA’s with an incredible performance.
Normani has received a lot of support from people who want to see her win but she is also faced with doubters who question her authenticity as she seems to be projecting an image and not her real self. However, that narrative is changing thanks to her new song “Fair.” Since its debut, “Fair” has earned a lot of praise from fans and artists alike such as her former collaborator Cardi B.
BEAUTIFUL …@Normani you look gorgeous and the song is soo good.Keep going ,keep working. https://t.co/srGojYiBVC
— Cardi B (@iamcardib) March 18, 2022
The song shows Normani’s vulnerable side and it gives fans a peek into the real person behind the artist. The multi-hyphenate sat down with Zane Lowe for Apple Music Radio and they discussed a variety of things such as the story behind “Fair,” letting go of perfection, and her new album being “the best music I’ve made thus far.”
On Being Vulnerable with “Fair”
“This record is another layer of who I am and my experiences and I feel like, I grew up in the public eye so you know it’s been very, very scary and very complicated. A sense of forcing myself into this idea of perfection to protect myself but this is the first time that I’m just free-falling in a sense and it’s scary. This is me being vulnerable and really captures a true and raw point in my experience that I wanted to share.”
On Making “Fair” While She was Experiencing Heartache
“What makes it so special, like I was saying, it captured me in the moment as I was experiencing in real-time. Like I was going through it emotionally. That day I wasn't sure if I could even really pick myself up to go to the studio. But ended up, and this was the result.”
She added, “And it’s therapy for me as much as it is for everyone else it’s for me. Putting this record out I didn’t know it was gonna be for me too.”
On Learning How to Let Go and be Herself
“Being 15 years old and not being able to be a traditional 15-year-old, teenagers make mistakes without getting reprimanded. I really think it took a toll on me in a large way. I guess having that experience so early and I think that I look up and I’m like, ‘damn you’re not even freeing yourself to just be.’ You have such a tight grip and not because I want to, but because I’ve always had to, which is a disservice to me and [my fans.]”
On the Need to Feel Validated
“I had to check myself. I think it was me and James Blake, we were having a conversation. We were just talking about just validation. I’ve never been one to need [applause] but you get used to it and when you don’t it’s like okay, maybe this isn’t—it doesn't feel as important.”
On Wanting to Be More Present
“I’m practicing gratitude too. Because it’s so easy to say and look at what everybody else is doing and what you’re not and then you’re constantly chasing after the next thing and the next thing and the next thing. With 'Motivation' I totally missed it. With 'Wild Side' I promised myself that I wouldn’t and I promised to be so, so present.”
On No Longer Being Hard on Herself
“I’m giving myself grace and I’m allowing myself to go through the process but also have room to grow. I’m sometimes like I wanna do everything, everything has to be—all the time, now, but I’ve never experienced what it was like to be a new artist for me.”
Normani: “Fair,” Moving On After Heartbreak, and Ghosting Zane’s Text | Apple Music
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Karwai Tang/Getty Images
There’s just something about HBCU Homecoming that just hits different. Whether it’s your first time stepping onto the yard since graduation or you’re a regular at every Homecoming tailgate, HBCU pride is undeniable. It’s a vibrant celebration that unites the legacy of excellence and tradition with the energy and resilience of Black culture.
The experience goes beyond a typical college reunion; HBCU Homecoming is a family reunion, a fashion show, a cultural festival, and a week-long turn-up that embodies what it means to be unapologetically Black and educated. For HBCU alumni, the journey back to the yard each year is rooted in a love and pride that’s hard to put into words but impossible to deny.
From statement pieces to tech must-haves, every item represents the intersection of Black pride and HBCU love, ensuring that you show up to the yard in style and with intention. So whether you’re repping your alma mater for the first time since graduation or looking for fresh pieces to express your HBCU pride, these essentials will have you standing out, because, at HBCU Homecoming, it’s not just about showing up—it’s about showing out.
Thread Goals
diarrablu Jant Pants in Alia Noir
High-waisted, wide-legged, and ready to shut down the yard, the Jant Pants by diarrablu bring a whole new meaning to campus chic. Handcrafted in Dakar, Senegal, these free-flowing jacquard pants are perfect for stepping onto the yard with style and ease—making them a must-have for any HBCU alum’s closet.
Silver & Riley Convertible Executive Leather Bag Classic Size in Olive
This all-in-one luxury bag isn’t a bestseller for nothing. The Silver & Riley essential is made of Italian calfskin leather and thoughtfully designed, as it can be worn in four different ways: a shoulder bag, crossbody, a top handle, and a backpack. Chic and elegant, the Convertible Executive Leather bag is “the bag that every woman needs in her collection.”
Renowned Women's Intuition Cotton Graphic T-Shirt
Renowned
Renowned’s Women’s Intuition Cotton Graphic T-shirt features a bold graphic print inspired by the power and essence of women’s intuition. With its striking design, this all-cotton tee is a vibrant thing, making it a statement piece that celebrates feminine energy.
Mifland Million M Mesh Crop Shirt
Talk about bold, the Million M Mesh Crop Shirt combines edgy style with comfort, featuring Mifland’s signature print on a semi-see-through mesh fabric. Show up and show out in sophisticated flair.
HBCU Love FUBU
Melanin Is Life Melanated & Educated - I Love My HBCU Hoodie
Show off your HBCU love with this piece that represents everything you gained from your alma mater: a top-tier education, a community that lifts you up, and a deep sense of esteem for yourself and your culture. Wear it loud and proud, because being melanated and educated isn’t just a flex—it’s a legacy.
HBCU Culture Spelmanite Sweatshirt in Navy
Spelmanites, rep your Spelman pride with this unisex crewneck sweatshirt, designed for ultimate comfort and a relaxed fit. Made from a cozy cotton/polyester blend, this classic sweatshirt is as durable as it is stylish—making it an ideal piece for any Spelmanite showing love for their alma mater.
HBCU Culture Howard Is The Culture T-Shirt
Rock the ultimate flex by showcasing your Howard U love with HBCU Culture’s Howard Is The Culture t-shirt. This unisex tee offers a comfortable, relaxed fit that’s perfect for celebrating your HBCU spirit without sacrificing style or comfort.
DungeonForward FAMU - Strike Bucket - Reversible
DungeonForward’s Strike Bucket Hat brings versatility and style to the FAMU Crown collection with its reversible design, giving you two looks in one. Featuring a sleek black snakeskin-embossed brim lining and a bold outline Rattler emblem, this hat is all about repping your Rattler pride in style.
DungeonForward Savannah State University - HBCU Hat - TheYard
The Savannah State University HBCU Hat by DungeonForward is more than just a hat—it’s a symbol of Tiger pride and a nod to the culture. Perfect for gamedays, tailgates, or just showing off your HBCU love, this hat lets you carry a piece of the yard wherever you go.
Tech the Halls
Anker iPhone 16 Portable Charger, Nano Power Bank
Stay charged up with the Anker Nano Power Bank, which features dual USB-C ports, a foldable connector, and a compact design, making it perfect for those HBCU tailgates and late-night parties you pull up to.
Drip Check
Wisdom Frame 14 Square Sunglasses
Elevate your look with these angular square-frame sunglasses by Wisdom, bringing an ultramodern edge to any outfit. The sleek design makes them perfect for blocking out the haters while you stunt on the yard.
Coco and Breezy Eyewear Fortune in Gray Turquoise
The Fortune Glasses in Grey Turquoise is a bold statement piece to any Homecoming weekend ‘fit that “embody our fearless and outspoken DNA.” With their color and edgy design, these frames by Coco and Breezy are perfect for anyone looking to stand out and express their unapologetic confidence.
Howard U Lapel Pin
Rep your Bison pride wherever you go with this Howard U Lapel Pin from Pretty AmbVision. Whether adding it to your jacket, shirt, or bag, this pin is the perfect way to showcase your love for your alma mater while rocking your HBCU love with honor and distinction.
Mifland Standard Rucksack Mini
The Standard Rucksack is designed to evolve like that HBCU pride—getting richer, bolder, and better with time. Durable, stylish, and built to last, this Rucksack by Mifland is a timeless piece equipped with versatile carrying options and fully adjustable back straps for ultimate comfort.
Stay Fresh, Stay Blessed
Slip Pure Silk Sleep Mask in Pink
Keeping it cute starts with beauty sleep. This luxurious silk mask is an essential for a reason. If protecting your skin and waking up refreshed is your priority, look no further than this Homecoming essential.
Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier Lemon Lime - Hydration Powder Packets
Stay hydrated and energized throughout Homecoming weekend with this Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier in Lemon Lime. Just add a packet to your water bottle, and bless your body with 2-3 times more hydration than water with every packet. Because staying hydrated is the key to popping up and showing out all weekend long!
Loop Experience Plus Earplugs High Fidelity Hearing Protection
Designed for your hearing protection, these sleek earplugs reduce noise without compromising sound quality—perfect for enjoying the band’s halftime show, late-night parties, and DJ sets. Whether you’re front row at the step show or hitting the yard, your ears deserve to be protected in style!
Black Girl Magic Glass Cup
Sip in style and celebrate your melanin with the Black Girl Magic Glass Cup. Perfect for morning coffee, your favorite iced drink, or showing off your HBCU pride on the yard—this cup is all about keeping it cute while radiating your endless supply of Black Girl Magic.
Glow Up & Show Out
Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30
What Homecoming weekend can be complete without an assist from this beauty find? Formulated to blend seamlessly into melanin-rich skin (no white-cast), protect your glow while you turn up with the Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30.
Sienna Naturals Issa Rae's Wash Day Ritual Set
Issa Rae’s Wash Day Ritual Set from Sienna Naturals includes the H.A.PI. Shampoo, the Plant Power Repair Mask, Dew Magic, and Lock and Seal to get your crown right. Whether you’re repping your coils or rocking a new color on the yard, these products restore and nourish your strands, keeping your hair healthy, strong, and Homecoming-ready!
54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter
Stay glowing from the tailgate to the after-party with the 54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter. Infused with African-sourced ingredients, this rich, multi-purpose butter is the answer to keeping your skin soft and radiant through all the festivities all Homecoming long.
Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil
Keep your lips looking luscious and nourished with the Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil. Perfect for adding an extra pop to your pout before hitting the yard or freshening up between events, this lip oil is a beauty essential for staying camera-ready all weekend.
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image by Visual Vic/Getty Images
From A Teenage Crush To A Power Couple, These Lovebirds Share Their Fascinating Story
A few months ago, I had the absolute pleasure of chatting with Jenna Nia and Donay of the Love and Fly Shit podcast. And let me tell you, they made me a fan. Since this conversation, I’ve been tuned into their content and have made watching their podcast a part of my weekly unwind. Wondering why? It’s because the power couple has a confidence that draws you in and an authenticity that feels familiar.
Now, if you’re wondering why they look so familiar, it could be for a bunch of reasons. Jenna Nia is a fashion designer who has styled many of our favorite celebs, like Keke Palmer, Normani, Mel B, and more. Also, she previously appeared on BET’s College Hill: Interns and even made appearances in a few music videos back in the day. But now, she’s immersed herself in the world of business and media.
Donay is an entrepreneur with 10+ years of experience in various industries. However, while balancing his work life, the businessman still maintains a healthy balance with fitness, fashion – and, of course, family that he shares online. It’s clear the pair takes their work and passion seriously. But from this convo it’s clear that they took their union even more seriously. Check out xoNecole’s exclusive conversation with the beautiful couple below.
Jenna Nia and Donay
Courtesy
xoNecole: Let’s start off by you both telling me a little bit about yourselves.
Jenna Nia: I’m Jenna Nia. I just turned 39 in July, and I am from St. Louis, Missouri.
Donay: I’m Donay. I’m 39 years old and I’m also from St. Louis, Missouri, but we’ve been living in Atlanta for quite some time.
xoN: Oh, okay, you’re both from the same area! Is that how y'all met?
Jenna Nia: Yes, we actually met in high school at about 15. We didn’t go to the same school, but we had a lot of mutual friends. We used to see each other often because of our different circles of friends, and I had the biggest crush on him. I thought he was so kind, funny, and he had his own little car (laughs). But I had a lot of friends that had little “situations” with him. Plus, he had a girlfriend. So we never really hooked up then.
Donay: But I’d say we knew we liked each other. We were always looking at each other and playing games.
Jenna Nia: He didn’t give me any real attention though –
Donay: I paid her attention. But she had a boyfriend; it didn’t mean anything to me. I still checked her out, but she didn’t really take me seriously until around 18.
Jenna Nia: Then I realized all he wanted to do was smash and be a horny little boy. So we ended up reconnecting when I was around 25.
xoN: Wait, so how did it progress to what we see today?
Jenna Nia: I moved away, went to college, moved to Atlanta, and then came back to St. Louis for a holiday break. We ended up rekindling through the same mutual friends. We were all hanging out over someone’s house. The chemistry was natural, and we hooked up. Two weeks later, I ended up dumping my boyfriend at the time; we were engaged a few years later, and here we are – still together.
Donay: That’s it. She laid it out perfectly.
"We were all hanging out over someone’s house. The chemistry was natural, and we hooked up. Two weeks later, I ended up dumping my boyfriend at the time; we were engaged a few years later, and here we are – still together."
xoN: I love stories when stories end like that. But let’s back up a bit. Take me through the process. After reconnecting, how did things blossom? Did y’all have the “what are we” conversation? How did it develop from an attraction to a relationship? Talk to me about the courtship.
Donay: We were talking on the phone every day. Those phone conversations got deep, fast. We were long distance, but I was phoning her in the morning, calling her baby - all the things. I was trying to charm her. And a few weeks later, I was saying, ‘I love you.’
Jenna Nia and Donay
Courtesy
xoN: I’m hearing that more and more, actually. Sometimes what’s understood doesn’t have to be explained! What did being in such a serious relationship teach you?
Jenna Nia: I learned there was only one man who could make me want to be with him for the rest of my life. I realized it’s possible to be crazy in love and not have to weigh options.
xoN: What was it that he did to make you feel like that?
Jenna Nia: It was the chemistry, it was like magic. It was a feeling. It wasn’t even anything he did. Honestly, we had a rocky start. You know how it is, they charm you but then you start finding out all kinda other stuff.
We had infidelity issues when we were young. So logically, I wanted to leave him alone, but my heart and mind just wouldn’t allow me to. Once there was nothing I could do to stop being crazy about him – I knew.
xoN: And what was it for you, Donay?
Donay: It was from spending time with her. I just knew. I literally didn’t like when she wasn’t in my presence. I knew she was my wife.
"It was from spending time with her. I just knew. I literally didn’t like when she wasn’t in my presence. I knew she was my wife."
xoN: Okay, so you spoke a little bit about infidelity. What were some of your biggest challenges, and how did you navigate them?
Jenna Nia: He still doesn’t claim it, but I feel like he had a whole relationship he never told me about when we first got together. But we were only 25, and it was before we got married. It was him learning to be with one woman and in a serious relationship – it was truly growing pains.
Donay: Like I’ve told her before, I was young and knew I was playing with something serious. I knew how real she was and that what we had wasn’t something I could just find again.
xoN: You mentioned family, what are some of your other shared values?
Donay: I’d have to say our lifestyle.
Jenna Nia: That’s really the best way to sum it up. We both have the same craving for nice things, luxury, and financial freedom. When it comes to how we want to live our life, we’re both action-oriented and proactive to obtain that lifestyle.
xoN: This is everything. But I mean, do y’all fight? What are some of the things you argue over?
Donay: (Laughs) We both are very strong-minded.
Jenna Nia: We fight the most over business. We own our businesses together, and there's so many moving parts. Sometimes, we don’t agree over stuff or have different approaches. We don’t really have outside problems, though.
xoN: Finally, I’ll close with this. What are your favorite things about each other?
Jenna Nia: There’s a lot of things. He’s very much my eye candy. He’s a super Dad. He’s with the boys more than me. But overall, it’s his perspective on life. He’s extremely smart, but he also combines it with action. He’s going to make it happen. Everyone doesn’t always understand people who go that hard, but I do. It’s very sexy and makes me feel safe and protected.
Donay: First of all, she’s fine and beautiful; I can’t keep my hands off of her. But outside of that, it’s her mind, ambition, hustle, strength, and the way she thinks. I respect her mind so much. You don’t meet many people with a mind like hers.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image courtesy