I have a girlfriend in her 50s who claims she doesn't recall one time when she's ever looked directly into her vagina. Not during sex. Not when she had her kids. Never. According to her, she basically washes it and trims it from time to time and that's about it.
Meanwhile, I'm the kind of woman who feels like my va-jay-jay is like a plant; it deserves to be loved on and even talked to on occasion. It's nothing for me to take out a handheld mirror and do my own impromptu inspecting to see how things are going down there. I'll even proudly shout her out when necessary.
Most of my friends know that my vagina and I are buddies. Maybe that's why it's not uncommon for them to hit me up with random questions like, "What should I wash my vagina with?"
Okay. The short answer is "absolutely nothing." One of the best things about our vaginas is they are self-cleaning; our bodies provide everything they need to maintain a pH balance of 3.8-4.5, which is why we shouldn't douche; it throws the balance off. But when it comes to our labia — the external folds of our vulva, which is the outer part of our vagina — that is something that we can safely pamper and love on with a few beauty products (preferably all-natural ones).
If you want to give your vagina — and by that, I mean labia — a bit of a treat, here are some all-natural homemade washes that are not only safe to use but can benefit your lady parts in so many ways.
Disclaimer: When it comes to the recipes that require water, room-temperature distilled water is best because it's the kind of water that is contamination-free and helps to detoxify your organs.
Rosewater and Lavender Wash:
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Rosewater is great for your labia because it's full of antioxidants, helps to treat infections, and also helps to soothe skin irritation. Lavender oil works well with it because it provides a calming effect while it soothes skin irritation and reduces PMS-related symptoms. Witch hazel is awesome because it contains tannins that help to tighten up superficial cells (it's also great for healing hemorrhoids and postpartum swelling). Rosemary oil increases blood circulation while reducing stress. The more blood that's flowing to your genitalia, the more awesome your orgasms will be!
Recipe:
1 Cup of Distilled Water
1/3 Cup of Rosewater
¼ Cup of Witch Hazel
1 Tablespoon of Rosemary Oil
6 Drops of Lavender Oil
Mix all of these ingredients together in a bottle, shake well and immediately apply (if you wish). This wash should hold for a couple of months, so long as it's kept at room temperature.
Lemon Leaves Wash:
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Lemon leaves have antibacterial and hypoallergenic properties that help to gently and effectively cleanse your labia. If you have any skin discoloration in that area, they can even that out over time too. Something else that lemon leaves have the ability to do is make your labia feel refreshed immediately after using it. Tea tree oil is ideal if you're dealing with a yeast infection or bacterial vaginosis. That's because it contains powerful antibacterial and antifungal properties that are able to relieve the symptoms of both, oftentimes within 24-48 hours.
Recipe:
1 Cup of Distilled Water
3 Lemon Leaves
1 Drop of Tea Tree Oil
Boil the leaves in the water and let it steep for 30 minutes. Add the tea tree oil and allow it to cool down to room temperature. It's best to store this in a glass container. It should keep well for 30 days or so.
Red Clover and Sandalwood Wash:
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Something else that's great for treating PMS-related symptoms is red clover tea; that's because it is rich in isoflavones (which are basically phytoestrogens). Another benefit of red clover tea is that it slows down the appearance of aging (labia lips tend to lose collagen over time just like everything else). This tea can even aid in alleviating certain menopause-related issues (like poor blood circulation and vaginal dryness). Sandalwood contains anti-viral and antiseptic properties. Plus, it's known to provide an aphrodisiac effect. Perfect for those nights when you've got a lil' sumthin' sumthin' planned.
Recipe:
1 Cup of Distilled Water
1 Red Clover Tea Bag
3 Sandalwood Oil Drops
Boil the tea bag in the water and let it steep for an hour. Add the sandalwood oil, let the solution cool and put all of this into a glass container. It should hold for 30-45 days.
Calendula and Coconut Oil Wash:
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Organic coconut oil is a vagina's best friend because it contains the kind of ingredients that kill bacteria, viruses, and fungi. It also has vitamin E in it to keep your labia soft and smooth. If you happen to have eczema or psoriasis around your labia or inner thighs, calendula has a great reputation for relieving the kind of skin that is associated with it. It is also the kind of oil that helps to keep your skin firm and moisturized.
Recipe:
1 Cup of Distilled Water
3 Tablespoons of Organic Coconut Oil
5 Drops of Calendula Oil
Mix all of the ingredients together and zap the wash in the microwave for about 10 seconds (just enough for the coconut oil to melt). Let it cool and put it in a microwave-safe bottle (so that you can microwave it again if the coconut oil solidifies). This one has a 3-4 month shelf life.
Aloe Vera, Yogurt and Honey Wash (Mask):
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Everyone should have at least one aloe vera plant in their house because there's honestly not too much it can't do! As far as your labia is concerned, it contains all sorts of vitamins, minerals, amino acids, and antioxidants to protect its skin. Aloe vera also contains polyphenols that help to keep bacteria at bay. Plain yogurt is loaded with probiotics that significantly reduce the chances of you getting a yeast infection. As far as raw honey goes, one study revealed that when it's added to yogurt, it can reduce yeast infection-related symptoms by as much as 88 percent!
Recipe:
1 Slice of Aloe
1/3 Cup of Plain Yogurt
3 Teaspoons of Raw Honey
This particular recipe is both thick and perishable (which is why it's more of a mask than a wash). That said, it's best to cut the gel out of the plant and put it, along with the yogurt and honey, into a blender for a few seconds. Then apply it to your vagina, let it sit for five minutes, and then rinse well (really well). Put the remaining amount in your fridge and it should keep for a couple of weeks.
Chamomile and Frankincense Wash:
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Chamomile tea does everything from boost immunity and reduce muscle spasms, to lighten skin and decrease stress levels in the body. It also helps to accelerate cell and tissue regeneration so that your labia can stay plump and pretty. Frankincense is an earthy scent that works as an astringent to kill germs and bacteria. Sweet almond oil contains plenty of vitamins A and E to moisturize, heal, and protect your labia.
Recipe:
1 Cup of Distilled Water
1 Tea Bag of Chamomile Tea
3 Tablespoons of Sweet Almond Oil
4 Drops of Frankincense Oil
Boil the chamomile tea bag in the water and let it steep for 30 minutes. Then add the sweet almond oil and frankincense oil. Let it cool and store in a glass container. This also will hold for about a month.
Baking Soda Wash:
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If you simply want to be proactive in keeping your vagina at the pH level it's supposed to be, look no further than baking soda. Being that it's naturally alkaline, it has a remarkable way of balancing your vagina's pH levels out. This means it helps prevent yeast infections, foul odors, and sometimes itching and burning too.
Recipe:
½ Cup of Distilled Water
½ Cup of Baking Soda
Mix the baking soda in with the water and use. Make sure to shake well every time before using this particular wash. This should keep well for at least 4-5 months. Enjoy (them all)!
Featured image by Getty Images.
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Kayla Nicole says she wore a dress that was once worn by Braxton herself for the Halloween costume. “It’s not a secret Toni is more on the petite side. I’m obsessed with all 5’2” of her,” she tells xoNecole via email. “But I’m 5’10'' and not missing any meals, honey, so to my surprise, when I got the dress and it actually fit, I knew it was destiny.”
The episode was the perfect way for the multihyphenate to take control of her own narrative. By addressing the viral moment on her own platform, she was able to stir the conversation and keep the focus on her adoration for Braxton, an artist she says she grew up listening to and who still makes her most-played playlist every year. Elsewhere, she likely would’ve received questions about whether or not the costume was a subliminal aimed at her ex-boyfriend and his pop star fiancée. “I think that people will try to project their own narratives, right?” she said, hinting at this in the episode. “But, for me personally – I think it’s very important to say this in this moment – I’m not in the business of tearing other women down. I’m in the business of celebrating them.”
Kayla Nicole is among xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, powered by SheaMoisture, recognized in the Viral Voices category for her work in media and the trends she sets on our timelines, all while prioritizing her own mental and physical health. As she puts it: “Yes, I’m curating conversations on my podcast The Pre-Game, and cultivating community with my wellness brand Tribe Therepē.”
Despite being the frequent topic of conversation online, Kayla Nicole says she’s learning to take advantage of her growing social media platform without becoming consumed by it. “I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out,” she says.
On The Pre-Game, which launched earlier this year, she has positioned herself as listeners “homegirl.” “There’s definitely a delicate dance between being genuine and oversharing, and I’ve had to learn that the hard way. Now I share from a place of reflection, not reaction,” she says. “If it can help someone feel seen or less alone, I’ll talk about it within reason. But I’ve certainly learned to protect parts of my life that I cherish most. I share what serves connection but doesn’t cost me peace.
"I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out."
Credit: Malcolm Roberson
Throughout each episode, she sips a cocktail and addresses trending topics (even when they involve herself). It’s a platform the Pepperdine University alumnus has been preparing to have since she graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, with a concentration in political science.
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Featured image by Malcolm Roberson
My main motive? Mostly, I hope that it will serve as a solid reminder to embrace all of the things that you adore about this time of year, so long as you do it in moderation and you weigh the costs.
Especially as far as drinking alcohol is concerned.
PRO: Manages Blood Sugar Levels
GiphyHere’s something that you may have never seen coming. Were you aware of the fact that alcohol can actually help to stabilize your blood sugar? Yep, according to the American Diabetes Association, so long as you leave it to no more than 1-2 cocktails a day, alcohol may be able to lower your A1C levels. Pretty cool, right?
CON: It’s a Carcinogen
GiphyAlcohol is a carcinogen. The reason why this should somewhat alarm you is because carcinogens are things (like tobacco, UV rays, processed meats, etc.) that can increase your chances of being diagnosed with cancer (especially mouth, throat, esophagus, stomach and breast cancer). There are various ways this happens including the fact that alcohol, specifically, can hinder your body from breaking down certain nutrients, it can cause your estrogen levels to spike and alcohol can also cause certain toxins to damage your DNA and certain bodily proteins over time.
PRO: Cultivates Euphoric Feelings
GiphyIf you find yourself feeling more euphoric while you’re enjoying a drink, it’s not all up in your head. Although, for the more part, alcohol is considered to be a depressant, when consumed in small amounts, it can provide a stimulant effect. This happens due to the fact that when you first start to consume alcohol, it causes the production of the feel-good hormone known as dopamine to increase — and since dopamine makes us all feel more relaxed and confident while heightening our senses of pleasure too…well, there you have it.
CON: May Increase Anxiety/Depression
GiphyAs they say, “what goes up, most come down” at some point — and that is what you have to be careful of when it comes to alcohol consumption. For instance, when you drink alcohol, although it tends to initially cause your dopamine levels to uptick, because it is a temporary bodily response, sometimes the dips are lower than the rises…and that is when anxiety starts to kick in. A similar point is made with depression because oftentimes, people with depression-related symptoms, will use alcohol as a way to deflect from what’s really going on with them — and that can make them feel even worse than ever once the buzz of alcohol starts to wear off.
PRO: Has Some Heart-Related Benefits
GiphyWhen it comes to your heart, there are interesting findings surrounding its relationship to alcohol. For instance, some research states that, so long as the consumption is moderate, alcohol can actually help to increase the good cholesterol in your system while also breaking down proteins that can potentially lead to blood clots; both of these factors alone can reduce your chances of dying from heart disease.
CON: Packs on Pounds
GiphyIt’s no secret that alcohol tends to contain quite a few calories. That’s why, it’s not uncommon for people who’ve lost weight to mention “I’ve stopped drinking” as one of the causes for the shed pounds. That’s not to say that there aren’t some alcoholic beverages that have less calories than others including vodka (133 calories per serving), white wine (148 calories per serving) and tequila (99 calories per shot). Just keep in mind that the more you drink, the more calories get into your system and the more weight you stand to gain.
PRO: Lowers Inhibitions
GiphyAlthough you really should only be uninhibited around people who you absolutely trust, if that person is your partner and you’re looking to have a pretty — eh hem — active evening, alcohol can certainly help to make that happen. The science of it all is the prefrontal cortex of your brain is what regulates your inhibitions and levels of self-control. Meanwhile, alcohol suppresses your inhibitions which can cause you to be more spontaneous and open to trying things that you might not immediately do if you were sober. And with the right individual, that can be sexually beneficial (emphasis on “right person”).
CON: Makes It Harder to Orgasm
GiphyOn the other hand, as odd as it may seem (in light of what I just said), if you have too much alcohol in your system, it could make climaxing difficult. That’s because orgasms happen, in part, due to your nervous system being stimulated — and since alcohol is technically a depressant…well, it could reduce nerve sensitivity (especially as far as your clitoris goes) for you while making it challenging for your partner to remain erect or have consistent stamina. And yeah, that sucks.
____
‘Tis the season. And with that, if some wassails or hot buttered rums are in your immediate future — hey, don’t let me stop you — not even a lil’ bit.
All I’m saying is now that you know what alcoholic drinks have to offer (both ways), you can know exactly how to incorporate them into your holiday plans. Enjoy!
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