This Is How Actress Kat Graham Achieves Flawless Skin
I'm not a skincare aficionado by any means, but as I enter my late twenties, I am becoming more and more aware of how important it is to develop a skincare routine with tiers and layers and to partake in that routine religiously. Skincare is genetics meet preparation, after all. Here on xoNecole, we talk everything from the right way to layer skincare products to the best hyperpigmentation products on the market. So as I look for more tips and tricks to add to my ritual in Operation Flawless Skin, there's no wonder actress Kat Graham is on my beauty radar.
Most known for her starring role in the CW hit The Vampire Diaries, the 29-year-old does a little of everything, from singing and dancing to modeling and acting. Recently, the starlet took The Cut behind the scenes of her getting ready for the Dior show during Paris Fashion Week, all the while filling us in on her biggest beauty and wellness secrets. Check them out below.
Kat Graham On Her Beauty & Wellness Routine During The Day
Featureflash Photo Agency / Shutterstock.com
Juicing has been all the rage as of late. In addition to the many benefits juicing does for the body, it also has an amazing effect on the skin. For those who struggle with acne or other skin problems, detoxing the body through juicing might be just what the doctor ordered. Kat loves juicing and makes sure to get some aloe into her diet as well:
"When I have a big day where I might have a lot of press, I'll juice during the day. There's a lot of really great juices that really bring out your skin. I didn't juice all day today, I snuck in a few French fries, but I did drink a lot of aloe as well."
Just as important as taking care of your skin on the inside is taking care of your skin on the outside. Kat reiterates that eating well and drinking copious amounts of water day in and day out are fundamental to her approach to skincare:
"You've got to eat well. A lot of people think they're going to have great skin just through topicals, and sure, there are plenty of products that can get you to a really great place. But if you're not eating well, if you're not drinking enough water, if you're leading a stressful life, if you're smoking, if you're sponsoring your bad habits, your stress and anger will show and it will manifest into a pimple, or redness, or an extra wrinkle you don't want. How you treat your body and deal with the world is huge."
And don't let the melanin fool you, protecting the skin is still of the utmost importance to Kat. She said:
"I have to protect my skin even though I'm a black woman because I will still get a lot of sunspots and freckles if I don't take care of my skin. I like a lot of drugstore products, to be honest. I mean I like SK-II and Laura Mercier, as far as fancier things, but I really love argan oil on my hair or my cheekbones for an event."
Kat Graham On Her Nighttime Routine
Kat might have to be dolled up for her day job, but at night, she prefers to let her skin breathe ASAP and removing her makeup is the ultimate first step of her nighttime routine:
"It consists usually of taking off my makeup and then kind of locking in some moisturizer. I'm a pretty big fan of Neutrogena and Aveeno wipes, but I've noticed that sometimes I need a little bit more because a lot of the makeup I wear is long-lasting from being on set or at a photo shoot or an event. After the makeup remover wipes, I usually go and use the Dior Hydra Life makeup remover. It's insane, I don't know what's in it but it's pure magic to me. I thought I lost it once and haven't felt that kind of panic in a while."
Sleep is also a big necessity for her in terms of maintaining her state of mind and her flawless skin. And since she starts her days at the crack of dawn, the earlier, the better:
"If I had my way I'd be in bed by 9 p.m. I'm not a night person at all. After 9, I'm pretty useless. I'll honestly go to bed around 10:30 p.m. I get up at 5:30 a.m. every day, no matter what."
"I love a good charcoal face mask, and I'll do that the night before a big event. When I'm jet-lagged I use a little lavender oil under my nose and it makes me sleep like a baby."
To read her feature on The Cut in full, click here.
Featured image by Featureflash Photo Agency / Shutterstock.com
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LISTÂ HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:Â Â
​Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
​Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
​Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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Featured image by Courtney Hale/Getty Images