
Depending on what side of TikTok you’re on, you’ve been seeing an uptick in content about the 4B Movement. In response to South Korea having the world’s lowest birth rate, TikTok user @denimchromosome gave a brief synopsis of the movement on February 16. “Korean women are so done with Korean men that they’re literally just deciding to die out," she said in her post.
Decoding the 4B Movement
While the video is only 30 seconds, this user broke the movement down to its essence and sparked a broader conversation for people to fully dive into knowledge about the movement and why some Korean women have decided to fully commit to this push for gender equality and social justice.
What Is the 4B Movement?
The 4B Movement gained notoriety and prevalence in 2019 when a collective of Korean feminists decided they would no longer marry men (비혼 bihon), have children (비출산 bichulsan), date men (비연애 biyeonae), or have sex with men (비섹스 bisekseu). The name of the movement came from all four agreements, starting with the letter B in Korean. The women who have chosen to participate in this movement are doing so as a result of the blatant misogyny that exists in their society.
They are challenging the cultural norms of their country by removing themselves from the dating scene, ignoring the beauty standards and consumerism propagated toward women, and calling out the pay disparity in the Korean job market.
Go Min Hee, a political professor at Ewha Women's University in Seoul, told NPR, "Gender gap in education has disappeared with the declining number of children and growing attention to education.” As of 2003, women’s college enrollment rates in the region have surpassed men’s.
“But the income gap in the post-education labor market hasn't closed," she continued. South Korea has the largest gender pay gap in the developed world, as of 2022, women still made 31% less than their male counterparts.
In the same report, Jeong Han-Wool, head of the Research Institute of Korean People, shared “For a long time, patriarchal norms governed South Korean society. But those social norms dissolved with democratization, and I don't think we have established new norms that can fill the vacuum.”
Han-Wool said the 4B movement was ignited by the Me Too movement here in the U.S., which he said sparked a new wave of young feminists in South Korea.
While others don’t connect it directly to the movement, they do acknowledge that 4B emerged after multiple incidents of high-profile murders of Korean women, a rampant culture of revenge porn, and spy cam sex crimes were at an all-time high.
Additionally, there is blatant discrimination against women in the workplace; married women are often subjected to gender-based violence, and women are expected to take on the majority of household and child-rearing responsibilities.
The 4B Movement: Tackling Gender-Based Bias
sexual assaultDigital creator Ryan Carriger said, “Through amplifying the voices and the experiences of the movement, it can illuminate the far-reaching nature of gender-based bias and challenge the social structures that reinforce inequality.”
However, some, such as Anna Lee, have said that the Western media is sensationalizing this movement in South Korea. Despite the fact that reports from the country’s Ministry of Education support the quickly diminishing juvenile population, which many argue is a direct result of feminism. As of February 2024, 157 elementary schools throughout the country will have zero first graders. The lowest reported since the ministry began keeping records in 1970.
Likewise, because of the uptick in feminist voices, young men have shared their feelings of “reverse discrimination” and want the government to get rid of the Gender Equality Ministry in large part because it’s making the job market even more competitive.
Yet, this government entity focuses on more than career equity. One of its main purposes is to protect Korean women who are victims of gender-based crimes such as sexual assault and rape. Opponents of the government’s desire to dismantle this ministry believe it is a dangerous idea and will only lead to more harm toward women in the future.
As the online dialogue continues to build around the 4B Movement, many women from across the world are standing in solidarity with the women of South Korea. Some American women online are sharing a similar sentiment that they’ve already committed to the agreements of the 4B Movement in their personal lives without knowing it was associated with any deliberate social activism.
@wtfaleisa Replying to @user9720585462941 ♬ original sound - wtfaleisa
The 4B Movement: Decentering Men and Toxic Patriarchy
As many women’s studies scholars have found throughout history, to truly gain gender equality, you have to destabilize patriarchal systems and institutions. Activist, feminist, and author bell hooks once wrote, "Feminism is a movement to end sexism, sexist exploitation, and oppression. Decentering men is a central aspect of this movement." Judith Butler, a gender studies scholar, has further added that decentering men "does not mean erasing men or their experiences, but rather acknowledging that our social and political structures have been built around a narrow understanding of masculinity."
Yet, in true social media form, some of the discussions that are emerging online are demonizing, shaming, and insulting women who are choosing to distance themselves from men, that are collectively harmful to their overall well-being. Proponents of the movement are providing counterarguments to these videos.
Some people can’t seem to wrap their heads around the fact that there are women who would rather be single, have full autonomy over their bodies, and build a life that they want for themselves. Many naysayers of the 4B Movement are calling these actions misandry.
Carrieger disagrees with the notion that the movement is discriminatory against men and says, “Just as Black individuals have long fought against systemic racism and oppression, women have faced their own battles against gender-based discrimination and inequality.” He continues, “The 4B movement's call to challenge traditional gender roles and advocate for the empowerment of women reflects the struggle for equality that resonates within the Black community.”
The 4B Movement: Finding Common Ground for Social Justice
Historically, any oppressed group looking to gain equal citizenship in a society is always met with pushback, violence, shame, and blame. We saw it with America's civil rights and women's suffrage movements. We saw it with the anti-apartheid movement in South Africa and, most recently, with the women’s movement in Iran. This conversation could continue for hours upon hours, and the debates on whether women hate men could rage on for millennia.
The one piece of the conversation that some people are failing to address is that women, not only in Korea but globally, have decided they’d rather be single, child-free, and at peace than have to be subjected to constant trauma, discrimination, and abuse.
It goes without saying that not all men fall in line with patriarchal beliefs or disagree that there are toxic men in the world. However, this conversation is about a collective experience women around the globe share when it comes to their roles in a misogynistic world.
Even women who are in loving relationships and happy to be mothers have shared their understanding of why women would not want to have anything to do with men. Women standing up for themselves and not wanting to feel like second-class citizens isn’t an attack on men, but a call for them to be held accountable for their behavior, both past and present.
And for men to acknowledge that women play just as important a part in society as they do.
I’ll leave you with this quote from activist and scholar Angela Davis: "Decentering men is not about diminishing men or their contributions, but about recognizing that true liberation requires challenging all forms of oppression, including patriarchy."
This quote fully embodies the essence of the 4B Movement and similar movements that aim to decentralize men in our global society.
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Exclusive: Viral It Girl Kayla Nicole Is Reclaiming The Mic—And The Narrative
It’s nice to have a podcast when you’re constantly trending online. One week after setting timelines ablaze on Halloween, Kayla Nicole released an episode of her Dear Media pop culture podcast, The Pre-Game, where she took listeners behind the scenes of her viral costume.
The 34-year-old had been torn between dressing up as Beyoncé or Toni Braxton, she says in the episode. She couldn’t decide which version of Bey she’d be, though. Two days before the holiday, she locked in her choice, filming a short recreation of Braxton’s “He Wasn’t Man Enough for Me” music video that has since garnered nearly 6.5M views on TikTok.
Kayla Nicole says she wore a dress that was once worn by Braxton herself for the Halloween costume. “It’s not a secret Toni is more on the petite side. I’m obsessed with all 5’2” of her,” she tells xoNecole via email. “But I’m 5’10'' and not missing any meals, honey, so to my surprise, when I got the dress and it actually fit, I knew it was destiny.”
The episode was the perfect way for the multihyphenate to take control of her own narrative. By addressing the viral moment on her own platform, she was able to stir the conversation and keep the focus on her adoration for Braxton, an artist she says she grew up listening to and who still makes her most-played playlist every year. Elsewhere, she likely would’ve received questions about whether or not the costume was a subliminal aimed at her ex-boyfriend and his pop star fiancée. “I think that people will try to project their own narratives, right?” she said, hinting at this in the episode. “But, for me personally – I think it’s very important to say this in this moment – I’m not in the business of tearing other women down. I’m in the business of celebrating them.”
Kayla Nicole is among xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, powered by SheaMoisture, recognized in the Viral Voices category for her work in media and the trends she sets on our timelines, all while prioritizing her own mental and physical health. As she puts it: “Yes, I’m curating conversations on my podcast The Pre-Game, and cultivating community with my wellness brand Tribe Therepē.”
Despite being the frequent topic of conversation online, Kayla Nicole says she’s learning to take advantage of her growing social media platform without becoming consumed by it. “I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out,” she says.
On The Pre-Game, which launched earlier this year, she has positioned herself as listeners “homegirl.” “There’s definitely a delicate dance between being genuine and oversharing, and I’ve had to learn that the hard way. Now I share from a place of reflection, not reaction,” she says. “If it can help someone feel seen or less alone, I’ll talk about it within reason. But I’ve certainly learned to protect parts of my life that I cherish most. I share what serves connection but doesn’t cost me peace.
"I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out."

Credit: Malcolm Roberson
Throughout each episode, she sips a cocktail and addresses trending topics (even when they involve herself). It’s a platform the Pepperdine University alumnus has been preparing to have since she graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, with a concentration in political science.
“I just knew I was going to end up on a local news network at the head anchor table, breaking high speed chases, and tossing it to the weather girl,” she says. Instead, she ended up working as an assistant at TMZ before covering sports as a freelance reporter. (She’s said she didn’t work for ESPN, despite previous reports saying otherwise.) The Pre-Game combines her love for pop culture and sports in a way that once felt inaccessible to her in traditional media.
She’s not just a podcaster, though. When she’s not behind the mic, taking acting classes or making her New York Fashion Week debut, Kayla Nicole is also busy elevating her wellness brand Tribe Therepē, where she shares her workouts and the workout equipment that helps her look chic while staying fit. She says the brand will add apparel to its line up in early 2026.
“Tribe Therepē has evolved into exactly what I have always envisioned. A community of women who care about being fit not just for the aesthetic, but for their mental and emotional well-being too. It’s grounded. It’s feminine. It’s strong,” she says. “And honestly, it's a reflection of where I am in my life right now. I feel so damn good - mentally, emotionally, and physically. And I am grateful to be in a space where I can pour that love and light back into the community that continues to pour into me.”
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
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What Happens In Vegas Ends In…Wellness? My Black Girl Luxury Weekend At Caesars Palace
Caesars Palace showed me that Las Vegas isn’t just the city that never sleeps — it’s also a place where Black women can rest, play, and find joy.
On TV and in movies, you always see the nightclubs, the casinos, the action of the Strip. And yes, that’s true. So I naturally didn’t think that I could find rest in Vegas, but I’ve never been more glad to be wrong.
Aside from this trip, I’d only been to Vegas once — and it was quick. I was speaking on a panel in LA for CultureCon during Juneteenth weekend when I realized Usher’s residency had a date when I’d be nearby. I bought a last-minute (expensive, but worth it) ticket and flew in for less than 24 hours just to see him. Worth every dime. This time, though, I was curious to see what else the city had for me.
As a guest of Caesars Entertainment, I was invited to experience the softer side of Vegas, specifically their first-ever spa buffet experience. We often look at Vegas as a place for casinos, elaborate shows, world-class dining, and nightlife. Now I won’t debate that all of that is true — but there’s so much overlooked relaxation tucked away in every corner.
Let’s Talk Accommodations
I stayed at Caesars Palace and my suite in the Augustus Tower opened to sparkling views of the Strip, with the Eiffel Tower twinkling in the distance. My itinerary was filled with champagne dinners, luxury SUV car service by Caesars Entertainment (that knew how to navigate around the Strip traffic effortlessly), and hours indulging in their new All You Can Spa program at The LINQ — a playful twist on the buffets the city is so famous for.
Honestly, my first thought of Caesars Palace was Think Like a Man Too, which was filmed here. But walking into the property myself, it felt bigger, grander. Like I’d stepped out of the country without leaving the desert. Caesars Palace was originally built to bring the grandeur of Rome to the strip— and it worked. The first time I experienced Rome was as a teenager, and staying here felt like I had some of that nostalgia with me, only a four-hour flight away.

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From my room, I could see the Eiffel Tower glittering across the way. All of it, as designed, felt very royal. My dad has called me the Princess of Zamunda since I was little (so much so that I thought Zamunda was a real place lol), so it was very on-brand for me to stay at Caesars Palace for her first full weekend in Vegas.
Because the legendary Qua Baths & Spa at Caesars Palace was under renovation (I can’t wait to return when it opens), I had the chance to try The Spa at The LINQ — home of the new All You Can Spa experience. And truthfully, every treatment felt curated just for me. Guests are given four hours to build their own spa “buffet,” choosing from facials, scrubs, wraps, and massages.
Here’s every service I had:

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- 80-Minute CBD Mud Wrap with Foot Massage My first mud wrap ever. The therapist guided me through it, even letting me feel the clay, and ended with a foot massage I’m still dreaming about. She was so sweet and a local who gave me the 411 on how to experience the Strip the way locals do.
- 50-Minute Signature Facial I was paired with a Black esthetician who understood my skin. She gave me thoughtful recommendations and sealed my treatment with a serum that left me glowing and ready for a night out. She even complimented me on my daily skin care.
- 50-Minute Body Scrub I’ve never been a scrub girl (I had a Turkish scrub once that turned me off), but this one converted me. My skin felt renewed, and she even warmed up my lotion.
- 80-Minute Mind & Body Massage with Hot Stones + CBD I love firm pressure, and my therapist delivered. She let me choose an aromatherapy blend called Love, and the hot stones melted every ounce of tension.
All of my therapists were women of color, and that intentionality mattered to me. Each service ended with an affirmation card, and I left every treatment feeling cared for in a way that was personal.
Between services, I had a champagne lunch that felt like an episode of Girlfriends. I remembered watching those spa-day scenes growing up, thinking I couldn’t wait to have moments like that as a grown woman. Sitting there in my robe with my best friend beside me, sipping champagne and catching up on life before we got into the action and excitement of Vegas is a moment I’ll always remember. That and how crisp those grapes were that they had on our charcuterie board.

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My Black Girl Luxury Vegas Recs
- Nobu at Caesars Palace My welcome dinner and the perfect kickoff to the weekend. Yellowtail jalapeño, wagyu beef, spicy tuna, shishito peppers, and a 24K gold-draped dessert you’ll only find in Vegas. Pure decadence. I also peeked at the Nobu Hotel tucked inside Caesars. If I came back, I’d definitely stay there.
- Rock + Roe at Caesars Palace I’m more of a R&B girly than rock-and-roll, but after some Veuve Clicquot and two caviar bumps, I was singing along to Stevie Wonder’s "Superstition," making friends with strangers (I had a very funny chat with a couple next to me who thought I was stood up and then discovered I was a journalist on a work trip and loved that for me) and I ended up staying until they closed at 2 a.m.
- Flamingo’s GO Pool Cabanas The go pool just underwent a $20 million renovation - and they truly spared no expense. My cabana felt more like a living room by the pool than a daybed, complete with couches, flat-screen TVs, IV drips, and a swim-up bar. I loved being close enough to the energy but tucked away enough to nap in peace, and I appreciated that they offered both cocktails and mocktails.
- Bacchanal Buffet One of the best brunch restaurants in Vegas. I went for the crab brunch, with short rib benedict, hashbrowns, eggs, seafood towers, and southern breakfast options that rival my favorite spots when I visit family in the deep South.
- Caramella at Planet Hollywood Their king crab scampi with fresh capers changed my life — and I was literally whisked into their speakeasy hidden behind a wall that looked like a candy shop. I thought the manager was just offering me a sweet for the road, but instead I ended up in a stunning club with some of the best music I heard all weekend. My only regret? Not staying longer because I had tickets to DISCOSHOW at The LINQ which was also fun! It felt like I was being transported back into the 70s and each floor had their own speakeasy bar.

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What I Love Most About Vegas: It’s A Side Quest Playground
You could start your day at a crab brunch, end up in a salt cave by 3 p.m., and then find yourself in a beach club at 3 a.m. screaming every word while Jeezy performs. That kind of spontaneity felt healing in its own way.
As we get older, side quests become things we tell ourselves we don’t have time for. But the truth is, we need them more. Life gets heavier, and joy becomes an act of radical self-care. A reminder that you deserve to rest deeply and play wildly. There’s room for both.
Black women are leading leisure travel spending in the U.S., yet simultaneously report some of the highest daily stress levels. That’s why side quests aren’t indulgent for us. They’re necessary. Escapes filled with 24-karat gold desserts, naps in luxurious cabanas, healing waters, and spa days with our best friends aren’t frivolous — they’re what keep us grounded and remind us that rest and joy can coexist.
Black women don’t always get the mental space to play. Even if we have the financial means, so many of us don’t have the time or permission to just… daydream. To imagine. To follow a whim. Vegas gave me that space — and reminded me how much I deserve it. I can’t wait for my next side quest, whether it’s in Vegas or halfway across the world.
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