For decades, the beauty industry has maintained a culture that prioritizes correcting and concealing our outward blemishes while overlooking our inward needs. As brands sell products with the promise of flawless skin, Devin McGhee, co-founder of the adaptogenic brand, Deon Libra, suggests that the key to one’s wellness starts by getting to the root of their stress.
After losing her father to a stress-induced heart attack in 2018, McGhee began to have difficulties sleeping. “A lot of people were like, ‘just take Xanax,’ because there were days where I was up anywhere from 48 to 72 hours with no sleep. Meaning no nap, nothing,” she recalls. Armed with firsthand experience of the effects that long-term stress can have on the body through the loss of her father, she began researching natural stress solutions to cope with her grief.
“I didn't want that to be my fate,” says McGhee.
Through her research, McGhee found out about a profound natural remedy that gradually put her mind and body at ease. “Adaptogens are essentially a specific group of herbs and non-psychedelic mushrooms that help your body regulate your cortisol levels,” she explains.
“I came across a sleep study that studied Black people sleeping versus white people sleeping. They monitored their heart rate and blood pressure and what they realized was that when Black people are sleeping, they're not truly at rest because their blood pressure and heart rates do not drop to the normal level of a sleeping human,” she says. “When I realized that, everything in my world and what happened to my dad clicked.”
Deon Libra CEO/co-founder Devin McGhee
Courtesy of Devin McGhee
It wasn’t long before she began seeing changes in her mood and after just two weeks of taking adaptogens, McGhee was finally sleeping again.
“I looked at Brit, our co-founder, and I was like, this works. Why isn't anybody teaching Black people about this?” she says. “There were no brands marketing this to Black people and teaching Black people." She decided to create her own.
Deon Libra, named in tribute to McGhee’s father’s middle name and his astrological sign, is an adaptogenic brand fostering beauty and wellness from the inside out. In November, the brand launched its ingestible adaptogenic powder, Unbothered, along with Big Up, a luxe, adaptogenic full-body oil serum that aims to make Black folks feel and look good.
Deon Libra COO/co-founder Brit Kirkland
Courtesy of Devin McGhee
McGhee and her co-founder/fiancée, Brit Kirkland, aim to supply “stress care to every hood.” Through their bold, luxurious, and educational products, the duo strives to challenge the “white, skinny, and feminine” standard within the wellness industry that often treats Black folks as an afterthought.
“In the wellness industry, we've been excluding so many people by trying to make it this cookie-cutter thing,” she shares. “I think what keeps a lot of people away from wellness is that it's so intimidating, and nothing looks fun,” McGhee continues. “Wellness can be fun; not everything has to be a meditation or yoga pose.”
xoNecole: Being a new founder, are there any obstacles or challenges that you've encountered along the way? If so, what have you learned from them?
Devin McGhee: As a founder, it feels like every day is an obstacle. Outside looking in, it just seems like everybody wants to be ‘the perfect founder,’ and everybody wants to have their shit together. But I've learned that that's impossible. If you're a founder, most times, it's your first time doing this. At one point in your life, it was your first time taking a physical step and you had to learn how to walk. I look at my founderhood the same way: every day, I'm going to do something and learn something. If I've never done it before, and I don't understand it, that’s okay.
I think a lot of times, the lack of knowledge and the lack of access to certain knowledge on your founder's journey scares a lot of people. The difference for me, and my co-founder—who's also my fiancée—is that we never let not knowing scare us. Just because you don't know something about a certain area doesn't mean that you can't learn it. And that doesn't mean that you can't find somebody to help you learn it or help guide you through that process.
"Outside looking in, it just seems like everybody wants to be ‘the perfect founder,’ and everybody wants to have their shit together. But I've learned that that's impossible.”
xoN: The wellness industry is a traditionally white space that can often feel exclusionary to Black people. How do you hope to shift this with your brand?
DM: I always like to emphasize that the wellness industry is very white, feminine, and skinny. When we were doing all those polls and surveys while trying to initially build the brand, one thing that stood out to me was how whenever I mentioned something with wellness and color, it came down to very muted, light things. And so for me, I had to first define what wellness looked like to me. And for me, it was balance.
If practicing yoga once a week or meditating is your thing, that's a form of wellness and it looks different for everybody. I really wanted to create a brand that allowed our people to create space for themselves during the day.
"For me, I had to first define what wellness looked like to me. And for me, it was balance. If practicing yoga once a week or meditating is your thing, that's a form of wellness and it looks different for everybody. I really wanted to create a brand that allowed our people to create space for themselves during the day."
Deon Libra
Courtesy of Devin McGhee
xoN: As someone who has battled with stress and seen the impact that long-term stress can have on the body, how has your relationship with wellness evolved since first starting Deon Libra?
DM: I think I'm very much a ‘do as I say, not as I do’ type of person right now, and it's not 100% intentional, but I am a founder, and there are sacrifices you make. I tell people it's really important to get sleep and take your adaptogens daily, and I try my hardest to practice that. But we run a whole company with just two people and I'm very straightforward about that. Like on Instagram, if I'm having a bad day, I have no problem saying that this journey is really, really hard right now. I think we talk a lot about founders making entrepreneurship look really glamorous, online and it's not, this shit is ghetto. I tell anybody who wants to do this that it’s worth it, but it's very ghetto.
Although I know how to take care of myself, I don't do the best and that's because I'm trying to make sure other people do it. There's a line on the Kendrick Lamar song, "Mr. Morale" where he says, "I'm sacrificing myself to start the healing," and that’s literally my mantra. I'm not gonna let this company kill me, but somebody has to make the sacrifice for Black people to understand how detrimental stress is to our life and that it can kill you. It killed my daddy and he was 54.
I think there are a lot of things that are challenging as a founder, especially as a Black, female LGBT founder. There are a lot of things you have to take and tolerate, so I think the hardest part about my wellness for me is balancing what I'm going to tolerate, what I want to change for other founders and entrepreneurs, and what I can deal with.
"There are a lot of things that are challenging as a founder, especially as a Black, female LGBT founder. There are a lot of things you have to take and tolerate, so I think the hardest part about my wellness for me is balancing what I'm going to tolerate, what I want to change for other founders and entrepreneurs, and what I can deal with."
Deon Libra
Courtesy of Devin McGhee
xoN: Overall, how do you hope Black people will feel and take away from their experience with Deon Libra?
DM: I hope that our people know that they are worthy of anything and everything good, to them and for them. Down to our branding, Brit was like we really need a little monogram that looks like luxury; like the LV of Louis Vuitton, because as Black people, we deserve to have luxury.
Luxury doesn’t have to equate to a dollar sign. Luxury for me is things that make you feel good and that make you proud to be exactly who you are and where you are at any given point in your life. I just want Black people to know that they are worthy of feeling good. I think everything cool and everything innovative comes from Black culture, I will stand by that until I die.
For more of Devin and Deon Libra, follow her on Instagram @devinkielle and @deonlibra_.
Featured image courtesy of Devin McGhee
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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And so, since this is the time of year when catching a cold (and/or the flu) is common, let’s talk about the impact that sleep (and again, a lack thereof) has on your immune system. That way, you can remain as healthy as possible during the fall and winter seasons.
1. Less Sleep Means More Colds
GiphyLike I stated in the intro, I’m pretty sure you’ve heard somewhere that the fall and winter are the seasons when people are most susceptible to catching a cold or coming down with the flu. And that’s exactly why I thought I would start this all off by sharing the fact that some studies reveal that if you get less than six hours of sleep, on a consistent basis, you end up making yourself more vulnerable to coming down with both. In fact, some research says that only 18 percent of people who get six-plus hours of rest caught a cold while almost 40 percent who got less than that did.
The logic behind it all is sleep gives your body time to build up the proteins and cells (like cytokines and T-cells) that you need to fight off certain viruses. So, if nothing bothers you more than having a stuffy nose or stubborn cough when it’s cold outside, getting more sleep is one way to prevent that from happening to you.
2. Less Sleep Means More Allergy Symptoms
GiphyAt the end of the day, an allergy is basically what transpires whenever your immune system “overreacts” to something that other people’s systems do not. And since sleep is what helps to keep your immune system nice and strong — well, I’m sure you get how less allergy-related symptoms and more sleep go hand in hand. Also, since sleep helps to decrease bodily inflammation (more on that in a bit) and inflammation can also intensify allergy symptoms, that’s just one more reason to get as much shut-eye as possible.
3. Less Sleep Means Potential Diabetes and Heart Disease
GiphyDid you know that in 2024, Black women were diagnosed with diabetes 24 percent more than any other adult demographic. Also, it continues to be a reality that heart disease is the leading cause of death for Black women. These two sobering statistics alone should be enough of an incentive to do whatever you can to keep the risk of diabetes and heart disease way down.
One way to do that is by getting more sleep. Aside from the fact that sleep strengthens your immune system to where it is easier for you to fight off illness and diseases, sleep can keep your blood sugar levels in a healthy space; plus, when it comes to your heart, it gives it, along with your arteries and blood vessels a break.
4. Less Sleep Means Less Time for Your Body to Push “Reset”
GiphyIf you really stopped to consider all that your body goes through during the day (you can read some about that here), you definitely would respect it enough to do your best to thank it by giving it no less than six hours of sleep, each and every night. Sleep is what helps to slow your brain and body down so they are able to “refuel” for the next day. After all, how can your body prevent you from getting sick if your immune system is too worn out to fight ailments off? Exactly.
5. More Sleep Helps You to Fight Off Infections
GiphySpeaking of, in order for your body to fight off infections, there are certain cells and antibodies within you that need to be healthy and strong — one way that they get and stay that way is by you getting a good amount of sleep. For instance, remember when I touched on cytokines earlier? Well, the same way that they help to prevent colds, they also help to prevent infections too. And since sleep lowers your cortisol (stress) levels, rest gives your body the time and space to build up an army that can fight off free radicals and other health-related challenges while you are awake.
6. More Sleep Lowers Bodily Inflammation
GiphyWhenever a health-related issue is mentioned on this platform, inflammation is something that is mentioned quite a bit. Probably the easiest way to explain inflammation is it’s how your body responds/reacts whenever something is happening to your body that shouldn’t be, whether it’s an illness, an injury, a germ or something that you may be allergic to.
If you happen to have chronic inflammation, some symptoms that are associated with that include fatigue, stiff joints, skin rashes, weight gain and moodiness.
The interesting thing about all of this is if you aren’t getting enough rest, you could be triggering inflammation in your body. That’s because studies reveal that a lack of sleep can elevate molecules that are associated with inflammation. So, if you don’t want inflammation to increase within your system, you should definitely catch more zzz’s.
7. More Sleep Regulates Hormones
GiphyWhen it comes to hormones like serotonin, estrogen and cortisol, believe it or not, they play a role in how your immune system acts and overreacts. That’s because, if your hormones are out of balance, that can cause your immune system to work harder than it actually should and that can make you more vulnerable to sickness. One way to keep your hormones leveled out? SLEEP.
That’s because sleep gives your body the opportunity to rest, repair and restore your hormone levels. On the other hand, when you are sleep deprived, that can put/keep your hormones on the ultimate roller coaster ride. #notgood
8. More Sleep Strengthens Vaccines
flu shot GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphyIf you’re someone who is good for getting some sort of vaccine around this time of the year, make sure that you rest up before and after getting your shots. Not only does adequate rest before a vaccination help your immune system to be better receptive to your shots but sleep also helps your body to build up enough antibodies to make your vaccinations effective after getting them. Because if you’re gonna get pricked, shouldn’t it be worth it? My thoughts exactly.
Get some freakin’ sleep! Your immune system depends on it.
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