Plenty of men avoid claiming one woman while Deray Davis, comedian and star of Living With Funny, is claiming two, girlfriends Coco and Caro. The throuple, a three-person couple, has been happily existing for more than three years. Forget for a minute that many would consider their romantic situation a social taboo. All things considered, they are realistically in a successful, long-term relationship.
If you do your Googles, you may come across Deray’s ex, Claudia Jordan, who tweeted that their split was because “he had too many b-tches.” So, instead of cheating, Deray decided to keep it real. Who knows if this three-way love situation has more or less problems than a twosome. Either way, Deray's unapologetic approach to love will work for some people.
Here's why:
Relationships aren't always pretty.
Sure, the bae photos we rush to post to Instagram are cute as hell, but when the shit called life hits the fan, you better be in a situation that speaks true to who you are so you don’t lose yourself in the fray.
Relationships , specifically the relating part , are gritty and downright ugly at times. Therefore, you should only entertain a relationship that represents what you truly need. You may not need two committed lovers like Deray, but you should at least learn to accept your relationship exceptionalities.
[Tweet "You should only entertain a relationship that you truly need"]
Some couples live in separate homes, others take separate annual vacations, and some decide to never have children. Their decisions may go against the norm, but one thing is certain : at some point two people sat down and had a very honest conversation about what they need. And when you keep it 100 about what you're looking for in a partner, you're sure to find it.
We bend and break our own rules too often.
Plenty of women think a good man who is able to fully commit is a unicorn. We say we don't want this or that in a relationship when, in fact, often times, we less than our expectations in fear that speaking up will send him running to another woman's arms.
If Deray never spoke up and admitted to his penchant for variety, Coco and Caro would just be additions to the string of scorned women trailing behind him. Ladies, we need to be just as brutally honest about what we need. You can’t stay open to love if you’re not ready to accept your truths and stick to your "hell nahs."
Life shouldn't be harder than it already is.
[Tweet "We are constantly met with opinions we didn't ask for by people we don’t even know. "]
But it’s the time to fully embrace our Black Girl Magic, especially in relationships. It’s OK to love differently than other people. Gay, straight, trans, couple, throuple, situationship, monogamy — hell, some women have even married themselves (side eye). Be brave enough to own everything you want in love.
Customizing your relationships doesn’t have to be extreme. You don’t have to be willing to have a Friday night orgy just to exist in the fullness of your personal truth.
But you do have to be OK with yourself.
Be OK with who you may (or may not) find as you navigate through love’s waters.
Be OK with building something that may not fit into what’s expected.
Be OK with the growth that is supposed to happen when you love yourself enough to love someone else.
And if you feel so compelled , cop two boyfriends and see what it’s about.
Just make sure you report back to us! :)
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THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Hyatt Centric Beale Street Memphis
Hyatt Centric Beale Street Memphis rooftop bar Beck & Call
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Sitting along the Mississippi River, both hotels offer breathtaking water views from the rooms, and Hyatt Centric’s rooftop whiskey lounge, Beck & Call, which is the city’s only riverfront rooftop bar, captures expansive views of both the river and the Memphis skyline. Grab a cocktail and take in the beautiful sites Memphis has to offer or enjoy the light show the Hernando de Soto Bridge, aka the “M” Bridge, has every night. On Fridays, guests can unwind and listen to live music.
Hyatt Centric also has CIMAS Lobby Lounge, which provides breakfast bites in the morning and cocktails in the afternoon and evening. CIMAS restaurant has a delectable menu that includes Latin-infused dishes for breakfast and lunch. Other amenities include room service, an outdoor pool with a cabana and poolside dining, a concierge, a fitness center, and more. My room was comfortable and the perfect place to unwind after a full day of exploring the city. I even had a view of the river.
Caption by Hyatt Beale Street Memphis
Caption by Hyatt Beale Street Memphis
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While I didn’t stay at Caption by Hyatt Beale Street Memphis, I did frequent its coffee shop/eatery called Talk Shop. Talk Shop is a laidback hangout spot that encourages community among its locals through its events like Blues & Brews and everyday activities like work (for all the remote workers) or meeting a friend for coffee or a cocktail in its beer garden. Its menu is full of variety, having everything from soft pretzels to BBQ pork sandwiches.
Caption by Hyatt Beale Street Memphis is built into the historic Wm. C Ellis & Sons Ironworks and Machine Shop building. Everywhere you look, you are reminded of its history due to the building’s industrial charm. But that doesn’t mean that it isn’t modern. The rooms are colorful and incorporate a lot of iron rods into the design, a nod to the ironworks building.
What is the Difference Between Hyatt Centric Beale Street Memphis and Caption by Hyatt Beale Street Memphis?
Caption by Hyatt Beale Street's Talk Shop and Beer Garden
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If you’re looking for more luxury or traveling with family, then Hyatt Centric might be the better option for you. If simplicity and vibrancy are key, then you may prefer to stay at Hyatt Centric’s sister hotel, Caption by Hyatt. Either way, you can’t lose.
Memphis Attractions
Beale Street sign
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Both hotels are walkable to all the city’s attractions, but of course, I have to start with the iconic Beale Street. Beale Street is where blues orginated and it is one of Memphis’ most popular places for tourists. Walking down Beale Street, you are quickly transported into another world, especially at night. Lights fill the streets as an array of restaurants and bars entice guests with its electrifying music. If you enjoy live music, B.B. King’s Blues Club is the place to go. The restaurant was created by the legendary singer B.B. King, who got his start in blues performing on Beale Street.
BBQ Chicken Nachos at Rendezvous
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As revered as Beale Street is, it's not the only spot in town to find good food and a good vibe. For breakfast, take a quick ride to Sunrise Memphis and take your pick from the mouthwatering biscuits on its menu. If BBQ is your thing, then you are in the right spot. Memphis is known for its BBQ, and Rendezvous is one of the city’s best BBQ joints. The highlight for me is the BBQ chicken nachos, which is a Memphis stable. If you’re looking for fine dining, then Amelia Gene’s is a must. The food is exquisite as it serves food pairings that are unique and full of flavor. I especially love the food presentations of each dish, which adds to the restaurant’s ambiance.
Amelia Gene's
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Other walkable attractions are the National Civil Rights Museum, the Blues Hall of Fame, and the Orpheum Theater. The National Civil Rights Museum is located at the Lorraine Motel, which is where Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was killed. However, the motel has become a memorial for Dr. King as well as the work that many historical figures have done over the years, specifically during the civil rights movement.
National Civil Rights MuseumCourtesyThe Blues Hall of Fame is near the National Civil Rights Museum, and it features exhibits dedicated to blues artists and culture. It has over 400 inductees and focuses on the history and achievements of each one. The Orpheum Theater is across the street from the hotels, and it is one of Memphis’ treasured venues. Its opulence is displayed inside and out as it stands at the intersection of Main St. and Beale St. As you walk in, you are greeted by a grand staircase and crystal chandeliers hanging above.
The Orpheum Theater
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Touring the theater, you see its beauty, but like many southern businesses that have been around for generations, you also learn about the segregated history. Walking around to the side of the building, there’s a “colored entrance” that was used during segregation. You can even watch a video from people who grew up during that era as they each reflected on their experiences of going to the theater. Many cited all of the steps that they had to take to get to the balcony, which was the only area Blacks were allowed to sit.
Issac Hayes 24k gold Cadillac in Stax Museum
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If you want to take a ride around the city, then hop on the Memphis Mojo tour. This bus tour stops at many landmarks, including Sun Studios, where Elvis Pressley and other artists recorded music. Or you can explore on foot by visiting all the haunted properities on the Memphis Ghost Tour. But we all know Memphis is known for blues, so I can’t end the story without mentioning Stax Museum.
The museum is named after Stax Records, which was a record label based in Memphis that housed a number of talented musicians like soul singer Otis Redding and Grammy award-winning artist Issac Hayes. What makes this museum exciting is that it showcases a variety of photos, records, costumes, and more from the artists on the label. But the highlight was Issac’s 24k gold Cadillac, which was put on full display.
Memphis is a charming city with a rich history and tons of activities for solo travelers, friend groups, and even families. So why not add it to your travel bucket list? By staying at one of the sister properties, Hyatt Centric Beale Street Memphis and Caption by Hyatt Beale Street Memphis, you will be surrounded by everything you need.
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