Aside from creating beauty content, you can find me 10,000 feet in the air traveling the world as a flight attendant. Every day isn't all glitz and glamour, but overall the benefits make everything worth it. To be completely transparent, there are bad days. You'll be away from your friends and family, customers aren't always nice, the days are long, and you're always on the go. On the flip side, no day is the same. I meet so many different people on a daily basis and I get to travel anywhere with whomever I want. The world is literally at my fingertips.
One of my favorite things about being a flight attendant, besides the travel, of course, is the flexibility. Some days start earlier and some days start when the rest of the world is ending theirs. I can choose what type of trip I want: if I want to go away for a few days, I can; if I want to come right back home, I can do that too. I personally prefer three-day domestic trips. I like to see a couple of places and then go home, but that can also change depending on what my plans are. To balance out my creative schedule with my work, sometimes it's necessary for me to go to work and come right back home.
My schedule varies a lot so it's important that I make planning a priority. There's no such thing as a routine for me and I like it. I love knowing that every day is going to give me a new thrill and nothing ever becomes mundane. Today is one of those days, I decided to do something completely different, challenge myself, and make a little extra cash so I picked up an international trip to Amsterdam. Picking up a trip is as simple as checking our board to see what flights need to be staffed. I want to make more money so I'm looking for high-time (high-hour trips because we get paid by the hour) and international because we get paid more for those flights.
Now, follow me on my three-day work trip to Amsterdam.
Monday
The first day probably won't be the most exciting, it will consist of a lot of preparation. Keep in mind I can't share as much as I would like because of security reasons (a girl ain't tryna lose her job) but I will share as much as possible.
10:00a: I wake up and check my phone (Instagram, emails, texts, etc.); not the best habit in the morning but I'm working on it. I also check what time I'm supposed to get to the airport, which is 18:50 aka 6:50 p.m.
10:15a: Brush my teeth and wash my face. Then, I charge all my devices: my work phone, camera, computer, and personal phone. Next, I check the weather: it's looking like it's going to be 40-55 degrees in Amsterdam while I'm there.
10:30a: I make a cup of coffee and some breakfast. Then watch my training materials on international trip service. I don't do international trips often, so I need to reacquaint myself with the material. I've also never been on this plane so I also need to get familiar with that.
11:45a: Start ironing my uniform, pack my bags for my trip, turn on my diffuser, listen to music, set my intentions, and get ready for the day. This is the self-care part of my day so I spend a lot of time just getting my mind right.
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
1:00p: Squeeze in a quick 45-60 minute workout. I'm going to focus on just abs and cardio today. I get on the elliptical machine in my garage and get it in. It's hard to create an actual schedule so I squeeze in workouts as often as I can. I should also mention that I just got back into working out again after a month-long hiatus.
2:00p: Start getting ready for work.
3:30p: Eat again and finish working on articles.
Sidebar: My days are long AF! You see my day has started way before my actual work day because there are still personal and creative things that need to be done. I also had to review some material for work. Even though we're trained for multiple aircrafts and services, we don't use them every day so it requires a little reviewing.
5:00p: Head to the airport, go through security, and head to the crew lounge.
6:50p: Meet my crew and pilots then do our briefing for our 7hr 48min flight to Amsterdam. I can't spill too much about our briefings but that is where we go over the need-to-know of our trip before we actually head to the plane.
7:40p: Get to the plane and check our emergency equipment, and set up the in-flight amenities.
7:50p: Start boarding.
8:44p: Takeoff.
9:15p-ish: We've taken off and we start our service. I worked up front in first class as the aisle flight attendant. Aisle flight attendants usually interact with the first class customers, serve meals and beverages. I wish I was able to take more photos but this part of the flight happens so fast there just wasn't enough time. Once in the air, we begin bar cart with beverages and warm nuts.
9:30p: Now it's time to bring out the food. I serve all the meals and bring out our base cart. This cart has soups, bread, and more drinks!
9:50p: Pick up all the trays and meals and get ready to serve dessert.
10:10p: Now it's time for me to serve dessert. For this service, I serve fruit, cheese, ice cream, cake of the night, and teas/wine.
It's back-to-back so we can take care of the customers, give them everything they need before they go to sleep.
10:40p: Clean-up all the trays and galley area.
11:00p: First crew rest break. This isn't my break but the first set of flight attendants take a break and we cover for them until their break is over.
Tuesday
1:30a-ish: It's my turn to take a break. On international trips, we have a crew rest area that allows us to take a nap. We have 2 sets of breaks, crew rest 1 and crew rest 2. I was a part of the second round and I slept for about 1 hour and 20 min before I started service again.
3:20a: We begin our pre-arrival breakfast service.
5:02a: We land in Amsterdam. It's technically 11:02a in Amsterdam.
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
Let's switch over to CET (Central European Standard Time)
12:15p: We check into the hotel and get settled. I took a shower and changed so I can start my 24hr layover. I usually take a nap but since I got in later than expected, I want to head out.
1:40p: Head out to the city. I took the Ferry out into the city and explored.
I visited the Red Light District, Primark, and tried some french fries. Amsterdam is known for its french fries and mayo, so it was only right that I try it!
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
I want to include this because it's important. I explored alone and before every trip I make sure I'm prepared to travel and have fun alone. The crews that I work with don't always want to do something and that's fine. So, it's important to be comfortable and open to going out solo.
I also visited over the edge to take in the beautiful view of Amsterdam.
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
Courtesy of Krissy Lewis
6:00p: Took a holiday light boat tour. (Sorry, I couldn't get much pictures because it was so dark and rainy).
8:00p: Got back to the hotel and got ready for bed. Getting ready for bed includes: removing my makeup and doing my bedtime skincare routine, showering, preparing my clothes for work, and unwinding in my thoughts.
Wednesday
Time to go home!
11:00a: Get picked up from the hotel. We have drivers that take us to and from the hotel whenever we layover anywhere.
11:45a: Arrive at the airport and go through security.
12:15p: Get to the plane, brief with the captain, and start setting up and boarding to head back to Atlanta.
1:11p: Takeoff.
1:30p: We're starting service. As a crew, we tend to rotate positions, so instead of working in first class, I'll be working in the main cabin. The first step in our service is to distribute menus and water. I'm working on the left side of the main cabin so I make sure every passenger has menus, water, and silverware. We continue service for about an hour and a half.
3:00p: It's time for the first crew rest break. Because the flight is longer (9 hours going back to Atlanta) and we finished service a bit earlier, our rest is 2 hours.
5:00p: The next crew takes their break and we start preparing for the second service.
7:00p: We start our pre-arrival service.
8:30: End service and prepare for landing. By this time it's 3:30 p.m. EST.
Switch over to Eastern Standard Time.
4:20p: We land in Atlanta and clear Customs.
5:10p: Get home and unwind.
This wraps up my three-day trip to Amsterdam. It's a pretty long three days but, to me, it's definitely worth it. I can travel and stay in nice hotels on the company's dime, I can check out places in and out of the country to see which ones I may want to travel back to for leisure and it exposes me to so many things — culture, self-revelations, travel, etc.
Featured image via Krissy Lewis
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Ding. Ding. DING.
A life coach by the name of Thomas Leonard once said that “Clarity affords focus” and, believe you me, when it comes to dealing with other human beings, if you don’t get clear on where you stand when it comes to your interactions with them, you can very easily find yourself “focusing too much” on those who don’t deserve it and too little on those who absolutely do. And y’all, this lil’ PSA couldn’t be more relevant than when it comes to what I call “casual friendships.”
Let’s dig — and for some of us, dig our way out of — what it means to have a casual friend, so that you can get clear on if you really need those in your life…and if so…why?
Article continues after the video.
It Can’t Be Said Enough: Always Remember What “Casual” Means
GiphyThere’s a reason why I decided to share two videos by mental health coach Isaiah Frizzle at the top and bottom of this article. It’s because a lot of what he shares in both of them complements a piece that I wrote for the platform last year entitled, “This Is Just What Purposeful Relationships Look Like.”
It’s the author M. Scott Peck who once said, “Until you value yourself, you won't value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it” and please believe that the older (and hopefully more mature) you get, the more you tend to see just how valuable — and fleeting — time is; and that is what plays a huge role in motivating you want to only involve yourself with people, places, things and ideas that will honor your time — and when something is casual? In my opinion, it’s highly debatable that it’s worth much of your months, days, hours, or even too many of your minutes.
The main reason why is addressed in an article that I wrote back in the day entitled, “We Should Really Rethink The Term 'Casual Sex.'” The gist? When it comes to relationships, “casual” is certainly not a favorite word of mine because I know what it means. Have mercy — why would you want to invest your time, energy, and emotions into something that is, by definition, apathetic, indifferent, careless, lacking emotional intimacy, and/or is without purpose?
I don’t know about y’all but that sounds like a complete and total crap shoot to me — especially if you are going to go so far as to consider this type of dynamic a true friendship (check out “Ever Wonder If A Friend Is Just...Not That Into You?,” “6 Signs You're About To Make A Huge Mistake In Making Them A Close Friend,” “5 Signs Of A Toxic Friendship That Is Secretly Poisoning Your Life,” “12 Friend Facts That Might Cause You To Rethink (Some Of) Your Own,” and “Less & Less Of Us Have Close Friends These Days. Why Is That?” ).
To me, when you decide to call someone “friend,” it means that they are loyal, reliable, consistent, trustworthy and willing to be there to support you to the very best of their ability — even if it’s inconvenient to do so sometimes (check out “Life Taught Me That True Friendships Are 'Inconvenient'”). How in the world can you expect that from something that has the word “casual” in it?
And you know what? That actually segues into my next point about casual friendships pretty darn well.
Ponder the Purpose “Casual Friends” Serve in Your Life
GiphyA couple of years ago, Verywell Mind published an article entitled, “How the 4 Types of Friendship Fit Into Your Life.” The four that it listed were acquaintances (which I actually don’t consider to be friends; check out “6 Differences Between A Close Acquaintance And An Actual Friend”), casual friends, close friends, and lifelong friends. After reading the piece, I think they consider casual friends to be the “pleasure” friends that I mentioned in the article, “According To Aristotle, We Need ‘Utility’, ‘Pleasure’ & ‘Good’ Friends.”
And although I certainly get that, I think my “cause for pause” is calling those people “friends” when they probably should be called something like an associate or possibly even a buddy instead. Why do I feel this way? Well, I’ve shared in other articles that I think social media has jacked up vocabulary words and their true meaning on a billion different levels.
Take “friend,” for example. Facebook had us out here calling everyone we connected to on their platform “friends” when some of them, we’ve never even spoken to before — and I personally think that influenced, affected and perhaps even infected our psyche to the point where we will call folks, both online and off, “friend” even when they haven’t earned it and/or who possibly don’t deserve it.
That said, do I think that we all could use lighthearted interactions that don’t go very deep and are filled with not much more than fun? Sure. However, if we were to move this over into a sexual thing — those types of people would probably be called a sneaky link, and there is nothing significant or substantial about ‘em. In fact, if anything pretty much automatically comes with an expiration date, sneaky links would have to be it.
And that’s kind of the point that I’m trying to make about a casual friend — so long as you know that the word “casual” is being used to describe them, while you may enjoy the people who fit that bill, they aren’t really anything that you can or even should fully rely on. Instead, take them for what they are and don’t really expect much more than that. Otherwise, you could be in for some profound levels of disappointment. And who wants that?
Final point.
How a Casual Friend Can Become a Huge Red Flag
GiphyI’m telling you, y’all gonna quit clowning Tubi. LOL. To me, the best way to describe it is it’s the Cricket of current streaming apps. What I mean by that is, back when Cricket (the cell phone service) first came out, people, like me, who used it service got incessantly clowned because it was seen as a bootleg provider. Now it’s owned by AT&T, and as someone who has rocked with them since I was in my 20s, I don’t have one regret for doing so. Cricket has always been good to me, chile.
And Tubi? Well, when you get a chance, check out CNBC’s article, “CEO at 33, Tubi’s Anjali Sud on success hacks she learned at Amazon, IAC on way to top of Fox streaming” — take note of the moves the streaming app is making and the quality of programming that is transpiring in real time.
Anyway, I find myself bringing up Tubi more and more in my content because it helps to amplify some of the points that I like to make. This time, it’s a movie that’s (currently) on there calledRight Man, Wrong Woman. If you haven’t seen it before, I don’t want to give too much of the film away. What I will say is that the main female character, she had a casual friend and then she had a close friend.
That casual friend—the one who liked to kick it all of the time—was a lot of fun; however, dealing with her came with a ton of semi-unforeseen consequences. Meanwhile, the close friend? She’s what the Aristotle article (that I mentioned earlier) would call the “good friend” because she tried her best to hold her friend accountable.
And really, it shouldn’t be a shock that the casual friend turned out to be a plum trip because if someone is loads of entertainment and pleasure and yet they are indifferent towards you, they make careless decisions around you and/or they don’t really make known the purpose for you being in their life other than to pass some time — where really do you and that person have to go past drinks after work or dinner on a rooftop restaurant from time to time? And if that is all that the two of you are doing, again, why are they deserving of the word “friend”?
Hmph and don’t get me started on the lack of reciprocity that typically transpires when it comes to dealing with people like this because, while they won’t mind you spending your coins on them, taking their calls in the middle of the night or listening to all of their issues — when it comes time for them to show up for you, they very well may gaslight you into thinking that you are being dramatic, clingy or “doing the most.” Why? Well, it’s mostly because the two of you never really established what the hell the both of you are to one another.
And so, while you’re somewhere taking them seriously, they are out here seeing you casually, and as much as it might hurt to hear, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily make them a bad person. You shouldn’t expect much where no clarity is involved. After all, casual is just that: CASUAL.
____
I’m hoping that you can now see why I entitled this piece in the way that I did. It’s because a red flag is pretty much a warning, and to me, a casual friend is about as big of an oxymoron (again, to me) as casual sex is. Friends and sex are both too intimate to be seen or treated casually. Oh, but if you step out and take that risk, you could find yourself getting far more involved than the other individual ever wanted to go, because casual is how things have always been. “Friend” was simply to get you more mentally and emotionally invested. SMDH.
American columnist Walter Winchell once said, “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” A wise person once said, “One good friendship will outlive forty average loves." Former President Ulysses S. Grant once said, “The friend in my adversity I shall always cherish most. I can better trust those who helped to relieve the gloom of my dark hours than those who are so ready to enjoy with me the sunshine of my prosperity.” Does any of this sound casual to you? Yeah, me neither.
Again, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t have people in your life who aren’t on deep levels. I’m just saying that you might want to consider putting them into another category than friend, because what friends do for people? There ain’t nothin’ even remotely casual about it, sis. Not even a lil’ bit.
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