Could ‘Intimacy Anorexia’ Be Ruining Your Sex Life?
Back when I wrote my first book, I coined a phrase called "sexual misuse". Being that I went through quite a bit of sexual trauma while growing up, I thought it was important to find a way to separate the difference between sexual abuse (what was done to me) and sexual misuse (poor decisions that I made on my own). That phrase came back to my mind a few days ago as I read a term I had personally never heard of before—intimacy anorexia.
Before I get into what that is and how it can both affect and infect a couple's sex life, let me first say that I know quite a few women—including Black women—who have dealt with the eating disorder anorexia (although reportedly, bulimia tends to be more common within our community). I don't want to make light of how that affects so many and so, for the record, I just want to share that one definition of anorexia is "loss of appetite"; what we're going to explore today is how a loss of an appetite for intimacy can ruin sex overall.
With that being said, if you're also not familiar with the phrase intimacy anorexia, let me take a moment to explain signs of this "disorder", along with what you can do to address it if you happen to recognize some of these signs in your own relationship.
How Can You Know If You or Your Partner Has Intimacy Anorexia?
I gotta admit that when I did some research on who came up with this term and read some of the signs that are directly linked to intimacy anorexia, I immediately sent Dr. Douglas Weiss's site to a married couple I know. It's a husband and wife who has basically been in a sexless marriage for close to five years now (to be real, things weren't going all that well even before then). The reason why I thought the site would be helpful is because, two years before an affair (by the husband) transpired, there had still been no sex going on. And although I've shared with the wife that she might want to look into how that played a direct role in the infidelity, she still refuses to see it. To her, withholding sex isn't nearly as "bad" as infidelity. Meanwhile, I'm over here like, even the Bible says, "Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." (I Corinthians 7:5—NKJV) Withholding sex deprives. Withholding sex tempts. Withholding sex ain't a good look—point, blank and period. A big part of the reason why is found in the word "withhold". Can anything healthy or beneficial be rooted in choosing to refrain from giving or granting sexual intimacy to your partner? Man.
The reason why I was so grateful to Dr. Weiss's breakdown is because it provides quite a bit of insight into how a couple can end up having sex less than 10-15 times a year (which is the textbook definition of what a sexless marriage is). According to him, this is how you know that you or your partner (if not both of you) are suffering from intimacy anorexia:
- You're too busy to make time for your spouse
- You constantly blame them for the problems in your relationship
- You refuse to express love in the way that your partner needs it
- You neglect to praise your partner so that they will feel respected and appreciated by you
- You consciously withhold sex and/or intimacy during sex
- You don't make it a point to spiritually connect with your partner
- You do not express your feelings with your partner
- You constantly criticize your partner
- You use money to either shame or control your partner
- Due to a lack of emotional bonding, you and your partner are basically like roommates
I must say that reviewing this list actually confirms what I once heard and totally believe—what goes on in a couple's bedroom sets the tone for what's happening in the rest of the house.
Because, think about it—if your partner doesn't make time for you, refuses to fluently speak your love language or is always on your back complaining about any and everything, why would you want to be sexual with them? And if they are treating you this way, doesn't it seem like they are sending not-so-cryptic messages that they don't want to be intimate with you either?
Now let me just say this, also for the record. If you just looked at the list of warning signs and thought to yourself, "well damn", don't write yourself off as having this disorder—one that the founder of it actually refers to as an addiction—just yet. For better or for worse, virtually all couples experience at least a couple of these red flags. According to Dr. Weiss, the way to know if it's full-blown intimacy anorexia or not is if you or your partner display five or more of these traits at the same time (you can confirm this by taking the only test here). If you do, that is somewhat of a cause for alarm.
The good news is knowing is half of the battle and there are things that you can do to start healing in this area.
Pinpoint What the Specific Issues Are. Then Discuss Them.
There's another married couple I know who've been together for well over a decade now. The wife says that they pretty much only have sex when she initiates it and, her husband sucks at foreplay. During an impromptu session with them, when I asked the husband what the deal was, he said that his wife's constant yelling and berating totally turns him off. Meanwhile, she said that the selfishness that she felt in the bedroom seemed to be pretty indicative of how he is towards her, period. Do you see what's going on? His ego is bruised and she is resentful. Who's having good sex in that kind of space?
So yeah, if you do recognize that you or your partner are experiencing some of the flags that I shared, it's important to not only acknowledge that with one another, but to try and see where these issues derived from. Then, be open and patient enough to listen to what both of you think can—and should—be done in order to remedy the matters at hand.
See a Therapist/Counselor/Life Coach
I watched T.I. and Tiny's Red Table Talk about their marriage. There is A LOT that I could say; for now, I'll just go with "good for them" when it comes to the fact that they went to counseling in order to save their union.
Personally, I don't think that married couples should wait until they're at the brink of divorce before they see someone. After all, it's one thing to get help when you smell smoke; it's another matter entirely to want someone to save your house when one-half of it is already burned to the ground. Yeah, I definitely believe that counseling should be treated like marital maintenance more than a last-ditch effort.
That said, once you and your partner have realized what the root of your intimacy anorexia is, sometimes that can make things worse, long before they start to become better. A professional can help the two of you navigate how to address your problems and also how to find real and lasting solutions. I know a lot of folks tend to give push back on counseling, but look at it this way—if you could handle things well on your own…they'd be handled. Right?
Work on Restoring Emotional Intimacy Before Revising Your Sex Life
Did you notice how the list of signs that point to intimacy anorexia only mentioned sex once? Things like a lack of a spiritual connection, feeling like you're roommates with your partner and not taking ownership for your own actions have nothing to do with physical intimacy; what they do speak to is how much of a mental and emotional breakdown that there is, though.
If there's a "loss of appetite" for sex itself, spend some time getting back to the basics in the sense of restoring your intimacy via going on dates, being affectionate without being sexual, affirming your partner, being supportive and yes—making them feel loved in the way they need to feel it vs. the way you wish to receive it from them. If you don't know what that way is, ask. A lot of drama can be avoided in a relationship if we'd stop being so busy thinking that we know more about our partner than they know about themselves.
One of the reasons why I'm grateful for insights like this one is, I can't tell you how many couples have tried to convince me that sexless marriages aren't "that bad" or aren't a "big deal". If you are in a long-term committed relationship, you're physically capable of having sex but you're not having it is—it is a big deal. Sexual intimacy is not to be treated as a perk; it should be seen as a necessary staple. Thanks to terms like intimacy anorexia, hopefully more sexless relationships can get to the root cause of their situation so that sexual intimacy can be restored.
If you're just realizing that intimacy anorexia is what you and/or your partner suffer from, it's nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed of. Now you know more of where your loss of appetite is coming from; now you can start on your journey to getting your groove back. Give thanks. A really good thing just happened—to you and your relationship. It really did.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
The Signs Of A Truly Intimate Relationship
This Is How To Feel Emotionally Safe In Your Relationship
10 Wonderful Reasons Why Consistent Sex In Marriage Is So Important
10 Things Couples Who (Consistently) Have Great Sex Do
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- Get to Know the Signs of Trauma Bonding - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Why Writing Love Letters Is A Surefire Way To Revive Your Marriage - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- How To Talk About Intimacy Issues With Your Partner - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Here's How Trauma May be Affecting Your Sex Life - xoNecole: Lifestyle, Culture, Love, & Wellness ›
- Sex Problems Ruining Sex And Possibly Your Relationship - xoNecole: Lifestyle, Culture, Love, & Wellness ›
- Intimacy Anorexia - Characteristics, Treatments & Resources ›
- What's Intimacy Anorexia? ›
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- Intimacy Anorexia: Healing the Hidden Addiction in Your Marriage ... ›
- Intimacy Anorexia: The Workbook: Douglas Weiss, Ph.D ... ›
- Intimacy Anorexia - YouTube ›
- 7 Tell-Tale Signs Your Partner Has "Intimacy Anorexia" | Argie ... ›
- Intimacy anorexia - Wikipedia ›
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- What Is Intimacy Anorexia? | Heart to Heart Counseling Center ›
Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
The Reality Of Living With Severe Asthma – As Told by 2 Women On Their Disease Journey
This post is in partnership with Amgen.
The seemingly simple task of taking a breath is something most of us don’t think twice about. But for people who live with severe asthma, breathing does not always come easily. Asthma, a chronic respiratory condition that inflames and narrows the airways in the lungs, affects millions of people worldwide – 5-10% of which live with severe asthma. Severe asthma is a chronic and lifelong condition that is unpredictable and can be difficult to manage. Though often invisible to the rest of the world, severe asthma is a not-so-silent companion for those who live with it, often interrupting schedules and impacting day-to-day life.
Among the many individuals who battle severe asthma, Black women face a unique set of challenges. It's not uncommon for us to go years without a proper diagnosis, and finding the right treatment often requires some trial and error. Thankfully, all hope is not lost for those who may be fighting to get their severe asthma under control. We spoke with Juanita Brown Ingram, Esq. and Jania Watson, two inspiring Black women who have been living with severe asthma and have found strength, resilience, and a sense of purpose in their journeys.
Juanita Brown Ingram, Esq.
Juanita Ingram has a resume that would make anyone’s jaw drop. On top of being recently crowned Mrs. Universe, she’s also an accomplished attorney, filmmaker, and philanthropist. From the outside, it seems there’s nothing this talented woman won’t try, and likely succeed at. In her everyday life, however, Juanita exercises a lot more caution. From a young age, Juanita has struggled with severe asthma. Her symptoms were always exacerbated by common illnesses like a cold or flu. “I've heard these stories of my breathing struggles, but I remember distinctly when I was younger not being able to breathe every time I got a virus,” says Ingram. “I remember missing a lot of school and crying a lot because asthma is painful. I [was taken] to see my doctor often if I got sick with anything so I was hypervigilant as a child, and I still am.”
Today, Juanita says her symptoms are best managed when she’s working closely with her care team, avoiding getting sick and staying ahead of any symptoms. Ingram said she’s been blessed with skilled doctors who are just as vigilant of her symptoms as she is. While competing in the Mrs. Universe competition, Juanita took extra care to stay clear of other competitors to ensure she didn’t catch a cold or virus that would trigger her severe asthma. “I would stand off to the side and sometimes that could be taken as ‘oh, she thinks she's better than everybody else.’ But if I get sick during a pageant, I'm done. I had to compete with that in mind because my sickness doesn't look like everybody else's sickness.”
Even when her symptoms are under control, living with severe asthma still presents challenges. Juanita relies on her strong support system to overcome the hurdles caused by a lack of understanding from the public, “I think that there's a lot of lack of awareness about how serious severe asthma is. I would [also] tell women to advocate and to trust their intuition and not to allow someone to dismiss what you're experiencing.”
Jania Watson
Jania, a content creator from Atlanta, Georgia, has been living with severe asthma for many years. Thanks to early testing by asthma specialists, Jania was diagnosed with severe asthma as a child after experiencing frequent flare-ups and challenges in her day-to-day life. “I specifically remember, I was starting school, and we were moving into a new house. One of the triggers for me and my younger sister at the time were certain types of carpets. We had just moved into this new house and within weeks of us being there, my parents literally had to pay for all new carpet in the house.”
As Jania grew older, she was suffering from fewer flare-ups and thought her asthma was well under control. However, a trip back to her doctor during high school revealed that her severe asthma was affecting her more than she realized. “That was the first time in a long time I had to do a breathing test,” she describes. “The doctor had me take a deep breath in and blow into a machine to test my breathing. They told me to blow as hard as I could. And I was doing it. I was giving everything I got. [My dad and the doctor] were looking at me like ‘girl, stop playing.’ And at that point [it confirmed] I still have severe asthma because I've given it all I got. It doesn't really go away, but I just learned how to help manage it better.”
Jania recognizes that people who aren’t living with asthma, may not understand the disease and mistake it for something less serious. Or there could be others who think their symptoms are minor, and not worth bringing up. So, for Jania, communicating with others about her diagnosis is key. “Having severe asthma [flare-ups] in some cases looks very similar to being out of shape,” she said. “But this is a chronic illness that I was born with. This is just something that I live with that I've been dealing with. And I think it's important for people to know because that determines the next steps. [They might ask] ‘Do you need a bottle of water, or do you need an inhaler? Do you need to take a break, or do we need to take you to the hospital?’ So, I think letting the people around you know what's going on, just in case anything were to happen plays a lot into it as well.”
Like Juanita, Jania’s journey has been marked by ups and downs, but she remains an unwavering advocate for asthma awareness and support within the Black community. She hopes that her story can be an inspiration to other women with asthma who may not yet have their symptoms under control. “There's still life to be lived outside of having severe asthma. It is always going to be there, but it's not meant to stop you from living your life. That’s why learning how to manage it and also having that support system around you, is so important.”
By sharing their journeys, Juanita and Jania hope to encourage others to embrace their conditions, obtain a proper management plan from a doctor or asthma specialist like a pulmonologist or allergist, and contribute to the improvement of asthma awareness and support, not only within the Black community, but for all individuals living with severe asthma.
Read more stories from others like Juanita and Jania on Amgen.com, or visit Uncontrolled Asthma In Black Women | BREAK THE CYCLE to find support and resources.
Let's Create A Nighttime Routine For Our Vaginas, Shall We?
If you’re someone who has trouble sleeping, let me ask you something real quick: do you have a nighttime ritual that you follow on a consistent basis? If you don’t, you should definitely consider getting one because there are plenty of sleep experts who vouch for the fact that doing things like setting a standard bedtime, disconnecting from electronics, taking a warm bath, doing some meditation, and reading before turning in can make all of the difference in the world when it comes to improving your quality of rest.
And while you’re out here being all proactive about sleeping well, why not show your vagina some love by implementing a nighttime routine for “her” too? When you’re tired after a long day, it might seem trivial on the surface; however, after reading this, I’m pretty confident that I can convince you to take giving your vagina some end-of-the-day TLC super seriously.
1. Give Your Vagina a Massage
A yoni massage might be what your vagina secretly craves.
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Reading an article on a yoga website is what inspired me to make this point. Although it should go without saying that there is a myriad of benefits that come with getting a professional massage (check out “12 Different Massage Types. How To Know Which Is Right For You.”), have you ever thought about why it’s a good idea to give yourself a self-massage on a weekly basis too? Not only is it a cheap and easy way to de-stress your mind, body, and spirit, but it also can help to detoxify your system and rejuvenate yourself.
Your vagina is no exception here. By rubbing your pubic mound, vulva, and the outer rim of your vagina, that can help to bring relief to minor discomfort, increase blood flow to that area of your body and help to boost your sexual self-confidence.
For the record, although masturbation and even vaginal mapping (check out “Why 'Vaginal Mapping' Needs To Be Part Of Your Healing Journey”) can be seen as forms of vaginal massaging, to learn more about how to give yourself the type of vaginal massage that is basically designed to bring you nothing more than rest and relaxation, check out “A Yoni Massage Might Be Your Tantric Ticket To Sexual Healing;” there are some techniques in there that I’m pretty sure will make you want to follow through with this tip, just as often as possible.
2. Invest in a Humidifier-Diffuser and Put a Calming Essential Oil in It
Keeping your stress levels low benefits you and your vagina in the long run.
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One of the best investments that I’ve personally ever made is buying a humidifier that doubles up as a diffuser. Humidifiers are bomb when it comes to keeping moisture in the air, reducing snoring, keeping allergens at bay, and so much more (check out “10 Really Good Reasons To Get Yourself A Humidifier This Fall”). Diffusers are cool because they can help to put essential oils into the air. Well, as far as your vagina goes, it needs moisture, and it can also have moments when it needs to chill out a bit (check out “Ever Wonder If Your Vagina Is Stressed TF Out?”).
Putting calming scents like lavender, clary sage, chamomile, orange, rose, bergamot, or frankincense into it will significantly increase your chances of sleeping (more) soundly — and that will only benefit you, your vagina, and every other part of your body in the long run.
3. Take a Magnesium, Calcium and Zinc Supplement
Supplements that keep the vagina healthy? Yes, please.
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Something that my mother used to give me was a magnesium, calcium, and zinc supplement. Listen, if you’re looking for a natural way to bring your nervous system down a few notches, I can speak from very up close and personal experience that this will get the job done!
As far as your va-jay-jay goes, magnesium lowers oxidative stress and makes PMS (and menopause) more tolerable; calcium (especially if it’s combined with vitamin D) can reduce vaginal dryness, and zinc is not only a solid libido booster, it can also help to keep your vaginal tissues nice and healthy.
Personally, I prefer to take vitamins at night because, if there is any minor discomfort while digesting them, I sleep right through it. Plus, if you want to be calmer as you sleep, a nerve relaxant makes all the sense in the world, especially if/when it’s all-natural.
4. Drink Some Kefir
Maintaining your vagina's pH balance can be as easy as drinking more kefir.
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Lawd, when it comes to vaginal care, if there’s one thing that I’ve learned that you damn near have to become your own chemist about, it’s maintaining your vagina’s pH balance (check out “Sis, This Is How To Keep Your Vagina's pH Balanced”). One way to do that is to take a probiotic; that’s because it keeps the bad bacteria that is (probably) inside of your vagina from overtaking the good bacteria. Plus, there’s plenty of science to support that probiotic intake helps improve sleep quality as well.
That said, if taking supplements aren’t really your thing, a nice workaround is drinking some kefir. Kefir is basically fermented milk (think drinkable yogurt that’s on steroids as far as probiotic content goes). If that sounds nasty, I’ve been drinking Lifeway’s brand for a few years now. It comes in different flavors and tastes pretty damn good. Now, if you hate yogurt…umm, a supplement it is, I guess. *Elmo shrug*
5. Rinse Your Vulva with Some Water
Whatever your personal wash routine, a little rinse never hurt nobody.
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Some health experts say that water is all you need to cleanse your vagina. Others say that you should just make sure that you use all-natural ingredients (check out “Love On Yourself With These 7 All-Natural DIY Vaginal Washes”). A cleanser that I am a huge fan of is Boric Fresh PH Balancing Daily Feminine Wash with Boric Acid, Tea Tree Oil, Coconut Oil & Essential Oil. It is so soothing and non-irritating.
Anyway, whatever your personal wash routine is, do make sure that you at least rinse your vulva before turning in. With any luck, you’re about to get 6-8 hours of rest and so, the less bacteria you’ve got lurking around your skin’s folds, the better.
6. If You’re Shaving, Follow It Up with Some Witch Hazel
Prefer to shave? Get yourself a bottle of witch hazel.
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If nighttime is when you do your vaginal upkeep, get yourself a bottle of witch hazel. It soothes skin. In a broader sense, it helps to speed up the healing of breakouts. It helps to treat psoriasis and eczema. It brings relief to a sore throat. It’s a strong astringent that contains anti-inflammatory properties. And because of that, it’s also a solid treatment when it comes to soothing skin after shaving and also helping to prevent ingrown hairs. It’s one of the best all-natural, inexpensive remedies for your skin from head to toe, no question.
7. Soothe Your Labia with Some Coconut Oil
Your vulva loves some coconut oil.
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I won’t lie — coconut oil and I have a bit of a love/hate relationship. Although, when it comes to natural hair care, I know that some women adore it, it tends to leave my hair dry (although it is a nice soother for my scalp whenever it’s irritated). And even though others like to “seal their skin” with it when they finish bathing, I personally prefer plum oil (check out “Plum Oil Is The Oil You Should Ease Into The Fall Season With”).
Oh, but if there is one time when I will TOTALLY sing its praises, it’s when it comes to applying coconut oil to my inner and outer labia. The saturated fats keep those areas naturally lubricated, the lauric acid that it contains helps to naturally heal yeast infections (and even a couple of STDs), and it’s also full of antioxidants and has antimicrobial and antifungal properties too.
So, get in those nooks and crannies with some of it; your vulva will totally love you for it if you do.
8. Soften Your Pubic Hair with Some Fur Oil
Prevent ingrown hairs and nurture your pubic hair with this oil.
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I’ve gotta admit that ever since I’ve become more intentional about literally nurturing my pubic hair, it has gotten so much softer to the touch. If pampering your own is something that you’d like to get more into, you honestly cannot go wrong with Fur Oil. It contains a blend of different lightweight oils that will moisturize your hair, help prevent ingrown ones, and leave that part of your body feeling smooth as silk. Is it cheap? Nope. Is it worth it? Absolutely, especially since a little bit tends to go a very long way. You can learn more about and cop some of it here.
9. Sip on Some Honeybush Tea
Drinking honeybush tea can do wonder for your body.
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Now ain’t THIS a trip? As I was doing a bit of prepping for this article, even though tea is totally my thing (check out “8 Teas That Are Really Good For Your Vaginal Health”), I’ve gotta admit that my “something new” for the day is the fact that there is a tea out here called honeybush — and boy, if that ain’t a new word that I’m going to use to define vaginas, moving forward, boy! Anyway, honeybush is an herbal-infused tea that hails from South Africa (this just keeps getting better and better!).
Some of its health benefits include it being loaded with antioxidants (which can help to keep vaginal infections from becoming an issue), it boosts immunity, it helps to bring relief to menopausal symptoms, and it also can keep your skin — on every part of your body — nice and healthy. So, if drinking tea at bedtime is totally your thing as well, pick up some honeybush the next time you’re at a local health food store.
10. Wear Nothing Down Below
There are gonna be times when your vagina needs a break from wearing panties.
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Even when you’ve got on the right kind of panties (check out “These Are The Kinds Of Panties Your Vagina Actually Prefers”), there are gonna be times when your vagina is gonna need a break. Between being cooped up in fabric all day long and the moisture and bacteria that can get trapped in panties after hours of wear, going without drawers can be quite beneficial. That said, even if you’re not someone who would even consider going without underwear during the daytime hours (check out “10 Women Told Me Why They Stopped Wearing Panties (And They Don't Regret It)”), at least try your hand and going to sleep without any panties on. There’s simply too much evidence out here to support that it can help to keep vaginal infections at bay; plus, sleeping naked is a great de-stressor as well.
11. Tell “Her” Something That You’re Grateful to Her For
When was the last time you gave gratitude to your vagina?
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Question: when’s the last time you told your vagina that you were grateful to her? No matter how crazy that might sound, if you really stop to ponder what life would be like without her (hell, just on the sex tip alone!), she definitely deserves a high five (umm, so to speak). And since there are proven health benefits of expressing gratitude, in general (including the fact that it relieves anxiety, decreases stress levels, and improves one’s quality of sleep), before turning in, at night, audibly tell your vagina one thing that you love her for. Something tells me that making that a nightly practice could probably end up helping you out in the sexual self-confidence (check out “10 Sensuous Ways To Boost Your Sexual Self-Esteem”) department, too.
12. Listen to Some Natural Sounds As You Fall Asleep
Nature sounds can do more than just increase your quality of rest.
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Although getting some z-z-z’s has never really been a problem for me, I will say that since I’ve been intentional about going to sleep with some rain sounds in the background, my quality of rest has increased in a major way. I’m pretty sure that it’s not by happenstance either because I once read a study that said listening to relaxing music for 45 minutes before turning in can affect your brain in a similar way that a sleeping medication would (the more you know). Know what else will do this? Sounds of rain, thunder, or nature.
YouTube is chock full of videos that will give you all kinds of nature sounds for hours on end for free (just go to the site and put the kind of sleep sound that you want into the search field). And since the less stressed you are, the more you decrease your chances of having a vaginal infection — anything that you can do to rest better would be a wise move, wouldn’t you say?
BONUS: Follow a Vaginal Pre-Sex Routine Too
Your vagina will appreciate the extra effort of prep before sex.
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If you’ve ever wondered when the best day of the month is to have sex, reportedly, it’s the day before your period; your hormones are in a state where you’ll have the most intense orgasms then. The best time of year? Right now — fall and winter. Rain makes us hornier. Testosterone levels rise. Being indoors more makes it easier to make sex plans. And although science actually says that around 7:30 a.m. (I’m not sure which time zone…LOL) is the best time for sex, we all know that nighttime is when things tend to be more convenient.
So, as I close this out, if your vagina is gonna be getting some serious action tonight, put a pin in this article, save it for tomorrow and check out “Here's How To 'Pregame' Your Vagina For Sex.” She’ll appreciate your extra effort, and ultimately…so will you. Sweet sex…sweet dreams or…BOTH. #wink
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