Start Celebrating Your Small Wins
It can be so easy to get distracted or even discouraged; especially when the wins are few and far between.
Focus.
Know what you want to accomplish and figure out what needs to be done to do so. Set big goals, goals that may seem unattainable to someone else; then do what's necessary to get closer to achieving them. By taking small steps and making progress towards whatever it is that you're after, you get to win a little bit at a time. Celebrate that.
A win is a win. Acknowledging even the smallest wins and giving yourself a pat on the back will motivate you to keep going.
It's natural to want to stop when you don't see results because we feel as though what we're doing is not working. But it is.
When we congratulate ourselves for our achievements, the fire we need to keep going remains lit.
Nobody can dim your light except you.
You must know that you don't need anyone's validation regarding your win, because it's yours. Remember that success doesn't look the same for everyone because everyone doesn't have the same concept of it. What's a win for you may not be for someone else, and that's fine. Your vision isn't meant to be seen or understood by everyone, because it's your vision. Don't let that deter you from what you're after. You'll have some people that get it, and some that don't; then there are those that see the excellence in you but try to downplay it in an effort to deter you.
Celebrate consistency.
You know what you're capable of, and even if you're not sure, be strong enough to continue anyway. Things will happen the way they should. The saying "hard work beats talent" is such a true statement because there are so many people that have the talent but don't have the will. If you have the will to succeed, then you're going to do just that. Consistency in itself is an accomplishment, toot your own horn just because you've maintained consistency. Giving up is so easy, so if you have decided not to, that's a win. Celebrate that.
Allow progress to push you forward.
When you take notice to every win, attaining the bigger goal doesn't seem so farfetched. It's like when you have a to-do list, checking off the smallest things gives you a sense of accomplishment and even lightens the load. Counting the small wins has this very same affect. You're able to see the progress you've made and how that progress has pushed you a little further toward what you're trying to achieve.
Round of applause.
We cheat ourselves when we don't find some form of happiness in the progress we've made. Giving recognition to the things we accomplish is so necessary for us to keep going. We must learn to build ourselves up, and clap for ourselves even if there is no one else around. In a world where validation is at the forefront of everything that we do, self-validation is all that matters. This is necessary for us to be strong enough to keep going when there's no one around to tell us to.
Have the will to keep going, find happiness in how far you've came and celebrate every milestone along the way.
xoNecole is always looking for new voices and empowering stories to add to our platform. If you have an interesting story or personal essay that you'd love to share, we'd love to hear from you. Contact us at submissions@xonecole.com.
Featured image by Plume Creative/Getty Images.
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Blondes Have More Fun: 7 Celebs Going Lighter This Spring And How You Can Too
If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Do blondes have more fun?” it could be time to answer the call for change with a new hair color.
As summer quickly approaches, many celebrities are taking the plunge and embracing lighter hair tones, infusing their tresses with blonde tones to match the season's vibrancy.
Whether you’re looking to add a few golden highlights through your mane or go the bold route of platinum, it's essential to understand how to go lighter in the safest way possible. We’re all about preserving the health and integrity of our hair; that’s why we’ve solicited the help of Crystal Arinze, a WellCapped Affiliate hairstylist, to provide you with the best tips and insight to achieve your desired bleach blonde look without compromising your crowning glory.
On how to prepare your hair before bleaching:
“When prepping to bleach hair, a protective barrier such as Vaseline should be applied to the scalp and around the edges of the head to prevent the bleach from touching the scalp/skin, to avoid burning and chemicals entering the pores, avoid washing, specifically shampooing the hair before bleaching. Shampoo strips the hair of its natural oils that act as a protective layer.”
Rihanna
Monica Schipper/WireImage via Getty Images
Zendaya
Marc Piasecki/WireImage via Getty Images
On consulting with your stylist before bleaching your hair:
“Stylists should also ask their clients about their prior history of bleaching their hair for better knowledge of the current state of the hair. Ensuring the state of the hair is moisturized and healthy enough before bleaching is very important. If the hair is weak, dry, or has been incorrectly colored in the past, bleaching is not a good idea. If bleached on already damaged hair, one’s hair could fall out within minutes.
"To achieve a blonde moment without sacrificing the integrity of the hair, clients can opt to wear a wig instead.”
Beyoncé
Serena Williams
Kelly Rowland
On how to avoid common mistakes when bleaching their hair at home:
“Many people do not properly calculate the appropriate amount of time the bleach should be in their hair. Not ensuring the consistency of the bleach is being mixed correctly is also a problem. Lastly, many neglect post-bleaching maintenance and care after bleaching their hair, which may cause the hair to become dry, brittle, and damaged. Anyone who would like to bleach their hair at home should do their due diligence and research step by step for the best results.”
Saweetie
Phillip FaraoneVF24Getty Images for Vanity Fair
Da'Vine Joy Randolph
JC Olivera/WireImage via Getty Images
On the best post-bleaching hair aftercare:
“Biweekly or monthly hydration treatments to ensure the hair stays moisturized. Regular maintenance trims help to remove dead ends and promote growth. Avoiding color long or bleaching again for at least 6-12 months after initial bleaching.”
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Featured image by Monica Schipper/WireImage via Getty Images