A new year is upon us, girl. I know you've got new goals to achieve, new ground to cover, new practices to master. You're on your "new year, new me" vibe and excited, maybe even slightly anxious for how it will go. I get it. I'm there too.
With all the big dreams and goals we set out on our journey to achieve, it can get overwhelming to figure out how to fight off all the things that vy for our attention on a daily basis. The inward commitment is strong but the practical tools are sometimes unclear.
Never fear! I caught up with 7 DOPE Black women to get a variety of tips, tricks, and motivation for how to combat distraction and how to feel good doing it!
Check out their nuggets of wisdom and comment, letting us know how you plan to kick distraction's butt in the new year!
xoQuestion: How do you successfully combat distractions from your calling/work in the age of social media?
Ashley Sharie
Business Advisor, Mindset Master, Founder of Aspire Business
Follow her on Twitter & Instagram: @loveasharie, @2aspireco
"I combat distractions literally by minding my business – in both a literal and figurative sense. Not only do I worry about myself and #slayinmylane, but I also practice a great deal of mindfulness and mindset mastery. When I get distracted in any form (comparison, over-consumption, perfectionism), I stop and ask, 'Why?' Rather than reprimand myself or rationalize the behavior, I take a step back and look at the 'why.' What is my trigger? How am I feeling?
"I assess my answers, course correct, and get back to business. Whether that means silencing notifications, unfollowing certain accounts, adjusting deadlines, unsubscribing from newsletters – whatever I need to do, I do it."
Gabrielle Hickmon
Writer. Founder & EIC of TheReignXY. Author, sunny.
Follow her on all social media: @gabbyhickmon, @thereignxy
(Photo credit: - Damola Akintunde)
"I get off social media. Anytime I feel myself getting too caught up in scrolling, I delete the apps and have a friend change my passwords. Sometimes it's for a week or two, others for a few months. It helps me refocus and get grounded. I try to remind myself that the work is the work. Posting about it isn't.
"In order to look like you're getting things done, you have to be doing something – even if it's crappy. So, get to work. Learn your cycles and work when you can. Rest when your body and spirit tell you to. You can't cheat the game. Well, you can. But don't you wanna earn your keep?"
"I try to remind myself that the work is the work. Posting about it isn't."
Inacent Saunders
Nonprofit Consultant
Follow her on Instagram: @groundworkforchange, and Facebook: www.facebook.com/G4CLLC
"First, I try my best to conduct my business in business settings. So, I find it easier to focus and ignore social media if I'm sitting at a desk in a coworking space, surrounded by other people doing their own work, than if I was at home on the couch, or in a local café, bumping the latest pop and hip hop tunes overhead. I rarely ever wander over to social media if I'm in a work/business environment.
"Second, regarding [online distraction/comparison], that's mitigated by simply remembering that my success is going to look different anyway! As a woman of faith, one of the things I've learned is that the path I have to take to get to my destiny and to fulfill my purpose, looks NOTHING like anyone else's path. My success won't look like their success. Who I'm called to, won't be who their called to. And my results won't look like their results. I'm learning to use social media in ways and at times that are not distracting to me. And when I do use it, I'm rarely distracted by the images of success and triumph I see folk sharing. If anything, I've learned to celebrate their success, because I know it's going to be just as sweet for me, in my own way, and in my own timing."
Lia Epps
Social Worker, Photographer
Follow her on Instagram: @liaeppsphotography and Twitter: @liaephotography
"I combat distractions by setting aside specific days where I dedicate several hours to my photography; I also am very fond of the Do Not Disturb feature. Additionally, I have accountability with other creative friends about new projects or upcoming deadlines and they keep me in check. One of my biggest drivers to keep me focused is that someone is depending on me to do what God called me to do. When I get off track, I am standing in the way of someone getting free or reaching their full potential."
Alisha Robertson
Founder, LivingOverExisting.com
Follow her on all social media platforms: @TheAlishaNicole
"I try to automate everything as much as possible so that I am not connected to my phone and social media all day. Automation helps me to stay consistent without always being present 24/7. Leaving my phone in a different room or on Do Not Disturb helps a ton when I am trying to focus and push through my to-do list. Also, whenever I feel like I'm starting to compare myself to certain people or whenever a post doesn't put me in a good space, I don't hesitate to unfollow."
Shay Duriel Davis
Digital Marketing Strategist and Creator, The Bronze Hustle
Follow her on all social media platforms: @shayduriel and @thebronzehustle
"I used to think that in order to really be successful, you would need to put yourself in a bubble and just never interact in order to really have solid work done within your work. Now, I believe there are also times when coexisting and creating a balance is just as important. Some of us do well with deactivating or handing off all social media duties but for those of us who not only weave it through our work but also enjoy connecting with our counterparts, there are a lot of dope connections and opportunities that can come from just scrolling your (curated) timeline. Regardless of if the people on your timeline enjoy your process and what the glam side looks like, it's the results that truly matter."
"Some of us do well with deactivating or handing off all social media duties but for those of us who not only weave it through our work but also enjoy connecting with our counterparts, there are a lot of dope connections and opportunities that can come from just scrolling your (curated) timeline."
Gynai Kristol
Videographer. Freelancer.
Follow her on Twitter & Instagram: @_KristolKlear
"When it comes to social media or notifications in general, I am the queen of Do Not Disturb. My phone lives on it and if I could turn it on for my life I would (my friends slightly dislike me for this haha). I tend to stay off of it especially when I'm in work mode. I don't really use Twitter, but Instagram had a lot of my time. When I was in the process of rebranding and relaunching my website about a year ago, I had completely deleted the Instagram app off of my phone. I found myself comparing where I was (like most of do) to where someone else was in their journey and career. So in order to just focus on myself and get my sh*t in order, I removed those distractions from my phone. And now, I occasionally turn the notifications off in the app itself."
Featured image of Gabrielle Hickmon by Damola Akintunde.
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The episode was the perfect way for the multihyphenate to take control of her own narrative. By addressing the viral moment on her own platform, she was able to stir the conversation and keep the focus on her adoration for Braxton, an artist she says she grew up listening to and who still makes her most-played playlist every year. Elsewhere, she likely would’ve received questions about whether or not the costume was a subliminal aimed at her ex-boyfriend and his pop star fiancée. “I think that people will try to project their own narratives, right?” she said, hinting at this in the episode. “But, for me personally – I think it’s very important to say this in this moment – I’m not in the business of tearing other women down. I’m in the business of celebrating them.”
Kayla Nicole is among xoNecole’s It Girl 100 Class of 2025, powered by SheaMoisture, recognized in the Viral Voices category for her work in media and the trends she sets on our timelines, all while prioritizing her own mental and physical health. As she puts it: “Yes, I’m curating conversations on my podcast The Pre-Game, and cultivating community with my wellness brand Tribe Therepē.”
Despite being the frequent topic of conversation online, Kayla Nicole says she’s learning to take advantage of her growing social media platform without becoming consumed by it. “I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out,” she says.
On The Pre-Game, which launched earlier this year, she has positioned herself as listeners “homegirl.” “There’s definitely a delicate dance between being genuine and oversharing, and I’ve had to learn that the hard way. Now I share from a place of reflection, not reaction,” she says. “If it can help someone feel seen or less alone, I’ll talk about it within reason. But I’ve certainly learned to protect parts of my life that I cherish most. I share what serves connection but doesn’t cost me peace.
"I refuse to let the internet consume me. It’s supposed to be a resource and tool for connection, so if it becomes anything beyond that I will log out."
Credit: Malcolm Roberson
Throughout each episode, she sips a cocktail and addresses trending topics (even when they involve herself). It’s a platform the Pepperdine University alumnus has been preparing to have since she graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, with a concentration in political science.
“I just knew I was going to end up on a local news network at the head anchor table, breaking high speed chases, and tossing it to the weather girl,” she says. Instead, she ended up working as an assistant at TMZ before covering sports as a freelance reporter. (She’s said she didn’t work for ESPN, despite previous reports saying otherwise.) The Pre-Game combines her love for pop culture and sports in a way that once felt inaccessible to her in traditional media.
She’s not just a podcaster, though. When she’s not behind the mic, taking acting classes or making her New York Fashion Week debut, Kayla Nicole is also busy elevating her wellness brand Tribe Therepē, where she shares her workouts and the workout equipment that helps her look chic while staying fit. She says the brand will add apparel to its line up in early 2026.
“Tribe Therepē has evolved into exactly what I have always envisioned. A community of women who care about being fit not just for the aesthetic, but for their mental and emotional well-being too. It’s grounded. It’s feminine. It’s strong,” she says. “And honestly, it's a reflection of where I am in my life right now. I feel so damn good - mentally, emotionally, and physically. And I am grateful to be in a space where I can pour that love and light back into the community that continues to pour into me.”
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image by Malcolm Roberson
