These High School Sweethearts Have Kept Their Love Alive For Nearly 15 years
High school is one of the best moments of your life. You're young, carefree, and the world is literally at your fingertips.
While some of us use this as a time for exploration on all things professional to romantic, others luck up early on and discover just what they want out of life pretty much before the "real world" hits. As for these highschool sweethearts, Dani and TJ Byerson, it didn't take long after being introduced to each other, for them to know they were meant to be together.
These two met at a random afternoon park outing with friends. While they were both there just as tag-alongs for the other people they were with, in reality, this initial meeting would be the beginning of the first and last romantic relationship they would ever know.
The second TJ laid eyes on his now wife, Dani, he knew he had to make a move. And he did just that! The two began their relationship that summer and have now been together for 14 years. From teenage love, to college, to now being parents to a beautiful baby girl, the Byersons show that true love knows no age limit, and finding your soulmate in high school is indeed possible.
While some may believe puppy love is just something you experience while you're young and not actually real, the Byersons prove otherwise, and show how their young love has grown throughout the years.
But I know you're wondering, after all these years how does one still keep the love alive right? After all, they are both each other's one and only romantic partner.. EVER! How did they do it? "Communication! We talk to each other about what it is we want both romantically and sexually. We explore all of our wants and needs, always," Dani shared.
These two have taken the power of their communication and love story to create their own podcast entitled The Lovers Quarrel Show where they get real about marriage, parenting, and everyday life. While they know their relationship is far from perfect, communication continues to keep their love thriving and they just want to help other couples get better at communicating and problem solving as well. It's what has led these high school sweethearts to build a life together throughout these 14 years, and their love journey is just getting started.
This is their journey.
The One
Dani: I knew he was the one by how dedicated and committed he was to seeing us go the distance. You don't meet young men who are convinced of who they want to spend their life with, with such conviction. He loved me and respected me and wanted to be with me.
"You don't meet young men who are convinced of who they want to spend their life with, with such conviction."
TJ: Everybody loving her, my friends, family, and myself. Dani is an amazing spirit. She is a great conversationalist, and she is intelligent enough to speak in any setting. But the defining moment was when I had the ring purchased and we had a big argument a few days before I was set to propose. That argument could've changed my mind to proposing but it didn't. That's when I knew that this was forever.
Lessons In Love
Dani: Marriage is not a job, but it is WORK. But in loving one another, I am always willing to dust myself off and get back to working at it. Because I love him, and he loves me.
TJ: Make sure you are friends first. Dani and I were friends. So our relationship was built on our friendship. Make sure you can be friends with the person you love and plan to marry.
Deepest Fears
Dani: My biggest fear walking into marriage was how would things change? We had been together so long but were also so young, and I wondered how things would be different (in both the good and bad sense). The fear of the unknown did linger a little. However, I let that fear go by understanding that TJ and I had faced so many unknowns before this and came out stronger and for the better as a couple. So I knew marriage would be no different.
TJ: I had no fears. She was the one, I was ready. I had the perfect woman and I wasn't letting her go. My only fear would've been to lose her.
"I had the perfect woman and I wasn't letting her go."
Building Together
Dani: Some of our early challenges were adjusting to living together, alone. All the years prior, we lived together we had roommates as well, so no "buffer" of sorts when he and I were on the outs. I also realized how "not handy" TJ was around the house. I'd like to think I'm more of a "Mrs. Fix It" than him. (laughs)
TJ: We lived together before we were married, but me being junky is probably her biggest pet peeve along with my shopping habit.
Learning Each Other's Love Language
Dani: I think it was enlightening to have evidence of the differences between TJ and I as far as what love language we speak. It put into words that we feel loved in very different ways, which is truly validating. But, it took time to understand each other's love language and how to convey that type of love to each other. So often, we express love in the way that we wish to receive it, and then end up disappointed at the lukewarm reception we get as a result. But, like with many things, TJ and I get better with time and understanding and conveying love in a language that each other would truly appreciate.
"So often, we express love in the way that we wish to receive it, and then end up disappointed at the lukewarm reception we get as a result."
TJ: It's work, just like marriage. It's not a job but it is work. So we learned and relearned and communicated through the process.
Common Goals
Dani: We want to be happy and provide for our family in the best possible ways we can. Our purpose is to enjoy life while also being in service to others as well. Our individual goals serve that common goal in that they include obtaining a quality education, remaining continuously hard-working, and community service oriented.
TJ: Being the best versions of ourselves, providing a great future for our daughter and future children. We are working hard in our profession, educational, and everything else to better ourselves.
The Power Of Prayer
Dani: [In relationships] when things are good, pray. When things get tough, pray even more.
TJ: [In relationships] when things get hard you pray, the harder it is you pray harder. You have to be willing to work, it's not something you can give up on.
For more on their love story be sure to follow them at @Daniwrote and @Byerson4 or on their joint account @loversquarrelshow. Also be sure to tune into The Lovers Quarrel Show, for all things love, marriage and everyday life.
Ashley McDonough is a writer and producer in New York City. When she's not busy writing or producing culturally conscious content, she is patiently waiting for Oprah and Stedman to adopt her. Keep up with her journey via social @Ashley_Milani or check out her work on www.AshleyMcDonough.org.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Rihanna Talks Shedding Expectations And Finding Balance As A Mother
Since becoming a mother in 2022, Rihanna has defined parenthood by her terms and hopes to pass that sense of autonomy on to her children.
For Vogue China’s April cover story, Rihanna shared her perspective on raising her two sons with A$AP Rocky, and how she hopes to preserve her children’s uniqueness, devoid of societal expectations.
"The most beautiful thing...is that [children] come into the world with their own individuality and sincerity, without any logic or conformity,” she told the publication. “Which usually makes you feel that you must fit into a certain group."
The “Work” artist, known for her trendsetting style and captivating persona, expressed her desire to support children in fully embracing their individuality and encouraging them to be whoever they want to be. "It's really beautiful to see and I want to continue to help them navigate that and make sure that they know they can be whoever they want to be,” she says.
She continues, “They should embrace it completely, because it's beautiful, and it's unique. I love them just that way."
From shattering music charts to shaking up the beauty industry, Rihanna has forged a path that has since created the “dream” life we see today. One that she says has made her parents proud of.
“I’m living my dream,” she continued. “My parents were very proud of that because they just wanted me to be happy and successful. So, I think the key thing is to find some kind of balance. Yes, balance is important. Do this and you get the best of both worlds. You can write your own life the way you want, and it will be beautiful. Sometimes, you just need to let go of everyone’s expectations and start living your own story.”
Rihanna, who shares sons, RZA, 23 months, and Riot, 8 months, with rapper A$AP Rocky, recently shared her vision for expanding her family in the future in Interview Magazine.
When stylist Mel Ottenberg asked about the number of additional children she hoped to have, Rihanna replied, "As many as God wants me to have.”
"I don't know what God wants, but I would go for more than two. I would try for my girl,” she adds. “But of course, if it's another boy, it's another boy."
Featured image by Neil MockfordWireImage