Feeling Yourself Is The Vital Step To Finding The Love Of Your Life
When are you going to start loving yourself unconditionally?
Six months from now when you lose that weight and your waist is snatched? After bulking up your slim figure and doing squats for booty gains? After contouring your nose for the gawds? After getting that perfect angle while damn near breaking your neck?
Girl, stop with that nonsense!
If not now, then when?
If not you, then who ?
To my surprise, I ran across an interview from recording artist Tweet revealing that her hit song "Oops" was not about giving herself an orgasm but the gift of self-love:
"It was empowering for me to write the song because I felt like I didn't love myself. I came from a time where my skin — being a dark-skinned woman — it wasn't really 'in'. I would always be teased for my skin color. I would always be called different names for my skin color, so I was empowering myself in writing the song."
The time is now for you to look in the mirror and love what you see. This cannot wait until tomorrow next month or next year! It takes practice, and requires you to (surprise) start to like the not so pretty parts of yourself little by little until you fall in love with yourself.
Read on to check out the 5 steps to loving what you see in the mirror.
1. Tear yourself apart.
Put it all on the table by writing it down. What are some of your perceived physical flaws? You think you have a big nose, a five-head, a fupa? Get it all out of system, be brutally honest as you can, and read that list out loud in the mirror. Start each insecurity on the list with, "I don't love myself because_________."
The most important part of this step is to let these insecurities leave the darkness of your mind's negative self-talk off onto your lips so you can hear how ridiculous you sound. I want you to really grasp how harsh you are towards yourself. You may laugh at many of your insecurities, and cry because of some but it vital to your self care that you release them out of your head where they fester.
Featured image by Getty Images
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New Jersey native creating a life that she loves while living in gratitude. She loves using beauty, and fashion to create a balanced lifestyle while prioritizing wellness. A devoted fur mom, and a full-time lover of laughter. She is out for revenge against the darkness by being light, taking her own advice, traveling the world, and letting you know that you are so lit! Connect with her via IG @iamzaniah and please visit Zaniahsworld.com
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Rihanna Talks Shedding Expectations And Finding Balance As A Mother
Since becoming a mother in 2022, Rihanna has defined parenthood by her terms and hopes to pass that sense of autonomy on to her children.
For Vogue China’s April cover story, Rihanna shared her perspective on raising her two sons with A$AP Rocky, and how she hopes to preserve her children’s uniqueness, devoid of societal expectations.
"The most beautiful thing...is that [children] come into the world with their own individuality and sincerity, without any logic or conformity,” she told the publication. “Which usually makes you feel that you must fit into a certain group."
The “Work” artist, known for her trendsetting style and captivating persona, expressed her desire to support children in fully embracing their individuality and encouraging them to be whoever they want to be. "It's really beautiful to see and I want to continue to help them navigate that and make sure that they know they can be whoever they want to be,” she says.
She continues, “They should embrace it completely, because it's beautiful, and it's unique. I love them just that way."
From shattering music charts to shaking up the beauty industry, Rihanna has forged a path that has since created the “dream” life we see today. One that she says has made her parents proud of.
“I’m living my dream,” she continued. “My parents were very proud of that because they just wanted me to be happy and successful. So, I think the key thing is to find some kind of balance. Yes, balance is important. Do this and you get the best of both worlds. You can write your own life the way you want, and it will be beautiful. Sometimes, you just need to let go of everyone’s expectations and start living your own story.”
Rihanna, who shares sons, RZA, 23 months, and Riot, 8 months, with rapper A$AP Rocky, recently shared her vision for expanding her family in the future in Interview Magazine.
When stylist Mel Ottenberg asked about the number of additional children she hoped to have, Rihanna replied, "As many as God wants me to have.”
"I don't know what God wants, but I would go for more than two. I would try for my girl,” she adds. “But of course, if it's another boy, it's another boy."
Featured image by Neil MockfordWireImage
