As a marriage life coach, I'll admit that it's kind of funny (and ironic) that I'm even broaching this topic. I mean, what I do for a living is give out advice. But I think that's kind of the point. When you're someone who is constantly offering up insights and perspectives, in the hopes that it will benefit other people, you learn, sometimes the hard way, what the right and not-so-right approaches are; especially when it comes to giving out advice that relates to matters of the heart.
I already know. Some of you are probably thinking that there's no real need to read an article like this. The way you see it, so long as people mind their own business, everything will be just fine. You're entitled to your opinion, but I respectfully and totally disagree. Something that all of us battle with is our egos and "wanting what the heart wants". The definition of heart is "center of emotions" and only letting your feelings navigate your choices is a surefire way to end up in some pretty painful, if not flat-out devastating situations—ones that could've been avoided if we had simply been open to hearing a from-the-outside-looking-in-perspective in the first place.
So no, the key to a thriving relationship is not to be out here living like an island and ignoring what people who truly care about you have to say. The objective should be to listen to people you trust; ones who have already proven that they care about you and that they respect you and your ultimate right to do what you want.
At the same time, for those of us on the giving end of relationship advice, our job is to making sure that we're sharing and not dictating, that we take the amount of influence that we have in the lives of others seriously, that we are careful and cautious with what we dish out (along with how we do it), that we are seeking to help and not harm and that we do our absolute best to avoid starting off our pearls of wisdom with the following phrases (you'll see why in just a sec).
“If I were you…”
GiphyWhenever skeptics wonder what makes me qualified to be a marriage life coach, being that I've never been married before, one thing that I share is the fact that there's a challenge that comes from only listening to other married couples that tends to go completely overlooked. When a married counselor, therapist or life coach is offering advice, it tends to be really hard for them to do it without bringing their own marriage into the dynamic. But here's the thing—what works or doesn't work for their relationship may not be as effective for two totally different individuals. In other words, they can sometimes come to the table with a level of bias that ends up doing more harm than good.
That's why I'm not big on the whole "If I were you" approach to relationship advice overall. Even if you and I are in very similar situations, the fact that you are you and I am me, that already makes things very different. The bottom line is, "I ain't you", so there's really no point is trying to advise you solely based on my personality, value system and feelings about your situation.
"If I were you" brings a lot of arrogance to the table. Arrogance is not a good foundation for great advice giving.
“I know how you feel…”
Back before one of my girlfriends and I got tight, we shared a somewhat similar experience. My fiancé died a few years before her child's father was murdered. When I saw her at church, a few weeks following his funeral, I said to her, "I know how you feel…" She looked at me like I was speaking a foreign language and said absolutely nothing. Later, when we got closer and I brought that exchange up, she told me that what I said didn't comfort her; it totally pissed her off. "Shellie, you didn't know him. Hell, you barely knew me at the time, so how could you possibly know how I felt'?!"
She's right. Although I don't believe that when a lot of us say this, we mean it literally, it's still something to shy away from conveying. Again, each experience is unique, so while we may be able to empathize (share similar feelings or thoughts about something or someone) or even understand to a certain degree, unless we are them, there is no way that we can ever truly or fully know what they are going through.
This kind of approach to giving advice can be offensive and off-putting (trust me, I would know).
“If he was my man…”
OK, so stop it. Stop it right there. He's not your man, so why are you even approaching the situation from this angle? Out of all of the things that we really need to stop saying while giving relationship advice to others, this one tops this list. I say that because, the reality is that if "he" was yours, the relationship—the interaction, the issues, the entire dynamic—would be totally different. Why? Because every person is unique and their connection with every other individual they come into contact with is unique as well.
So, whatever it is that your friend is going through with her man, if you were in that very same situation, things would not be the same. That's why it doesn't even make sense to talk about what you would do if someone who isn't your man actually was.
It's far more productive to speak on what you know about the character, history and pattern of the couple that actually exists than to be basing things on hypotheticals anyway.
“There’s no way that could ever be me.”
Don't you just love—by the way, I'm sarcastically using that word here—when you're in a jacked up situation with a guy and one of your friends thinks that she's helping by saying something along the lines of it being something she would never do or a situation she would never tolerate. Whatever, girl.
I've been pretty open about my past abortions on this site before. Well, during one of my pregnancies, a "friend" at the time went on and on to me about how she would never have one and how I was going to hell. She was a virgin. Fast forward a semester or two later and here was the same girl asking me what clinic I went to. SMDH. What changed? Her circumstances.
It's easy to for a single woman to say what she wouldn't tolerate in a marriage. It's easy for a virgin to not get how another woman could get completely sprung on the "d". It's easy for someone who's never been in abusive relationship to not understand why someone who is would struggle with getting out.
If you're one of those folks who's notorious for starting off your advice by reminding someone of what you would never put up with, be careful. Sometimes your lack of compassion will end you up in a similar state, just so that you can humble yourself.
“See, what you need to do is…”
I'll raise my hand in this class and say that this is something I had to learn to stop saying. One reason why it's not a smart approach to giving advice is if someone really does value your opinion and they do what you say and then it backfires, you've got a world of hurt (or more hurt) to deal with. Another problem with this is timing is everything. What someone may need to do today may look totally different a week from now. And finally, need is a really big word.
The mistake that I used to make is convey that what someone needed to do was really no more than a want. If a couple is going through a rough patch, they may need some space but since I don't like what or both of them are going through, I'll want them to break-up. But the word I will use is "need".
Need is a necessity or requirement. If you're out here actually telling someone that they need to do—or not do—something, make sure that's the truth and that you have some hardcore facts to back that up. Make sure you're not imposing your wants instead. Otherwise, what you may need to do is apologize for being so reckless with your words later down the pike.
“When are we gonna stop talking about this?!”
Love is patient. I didn't make that up. It's in the Bible (I Corinthians 13:4). Patient is a difficult word too. It means "bearing provocation, annoyance, misfortune, delay, hardship, pain, etc. with fortitude and calm and without complaint, anger, or the like". A whole lot of us are out here professing to love people but the minute they go through a hardship or something painful—especially if it's something that we don't understand—we're out. Or at least unavailable until "the storm" passes over.
If there are fellow Leos reading this, I'd like to hear your comments about what I'm about to say. Two of my closest friends are Leos and a common trait of theirs is that they will be your greatest support system…so long as they see that you are making progress. But if you're in an uncomfortable pattern—or even if you're simply justifying counterproductive behavior—their tolerance is shorter than a mother. They basically disconnect.
To a certain extent, I get it. Giving advice to people who are going to keep doing unhealthy things is exhausting, to say the least. At the same time, some of us need a little more, yes patience, than others. And so, when you start off giving your perspective with a long sigh, dramatic eye roll and a "this…again?!" approach, it can make the other person feel embarrassed at best, humiliated and berated, at worst. None of that is good. Or healthy. Or helpful.
Honorable Mention: “God told me to tell you that…”
GiphyLet me start off by saying this—God is always communicating with his children. And sometimes, he will give us messages to give to others. At the same time, if it's God, it's going to be helpful and beneficial. It may challenge someone (even correct them) but it will also bring forth a sense of clarity and peace. Oftentimes, what it will also do is speak to something specific that you may know very little about (meaning, it will confirm something in the person; something that you may not know or even need to know). It will also make them better, not worse.
Here's what it won't do. It won't hurt them. It won't put fear into them. And it won't be slick controlling or manipulative. Here's an example. There's a woman I know who wanted me to date her son. I wasn't interested, so she used to say that "God told her" that he was my husband. Really? The guy with a boatload of kids, a police record a mile-long who sells and doesn't pay child support? That's who my husband is? Nooooo…your son is a hot mess and you want some woman to take him off of your hands, so you are "using God" to do your bidding—not the God of the Bible but the one that you made up, by the way.
Moral to the story. It's pretty bold to start off any advice with "God told me to say". So, before you do it, make sure that is true. If you're not sure, don't say it. If you ignore my—eh hem—advice on this, there's a chance that you'll end up irritating the person you're talking to and God. Then you'll be the one needing some insight on what to do about the mess you NOT GOD made. (I'm pretty sure that's the last thing you want on your plate!)
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RELATED
Whether you're planning to meet a certain financial or fitness goal, or you're simply trying to maintain and build on the progress you made this year, having something to look forward to is always a good look. Setting actual goals, according to research, actually leads to more success than just playing things by ear. So here are a few to get you started, sis:
(Disclaimer: Not everything is for everyone, so do like my Granny always says: "Eat the meat. Spit out the bone." Take on five out of the 40 and focus on that for the remainder of the year, or do them all. Either way, this is just to get you started.)
40 Ways To End The Year Strong and Inspired
Money Moves
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1. Increase your retirement (or other savings/investment) contributions by 1%.
Experts have found that you could be leaving money on the table by not upping your contributions when you can.
2. Cancel two to five subscriptions.
You could be missing hundreds, even thousands, of dollars a year due to sneaky price hikes and "updates."
3. Create a "fun" in a high-yield savings account.
This is especially important if you struggle with the dreaded b-word (budget) and will make next year's efforts a lot less intimidating. Even if it's $10 a month, do it.
4. Put on your big-girl panties, and set up automatic transfers and payments for at least one bill.
It reduces the stress of managing bills, lessens the chance of a missed payment---and the fees that come with that---and there can be cost savings for doing so.
5. Invest in a cleaner or housekeeping service.
Bosses who value their time (and mental health) invest their dollars into areas where the time they'd spend doing those tasks themselves could be better used to focus on other money-making projects. (And yes, rest is part of that.) Get a housekeeper, sis, or drop off that laundry, even if it's once per month.
6. Donate to a charity.
Beyond the tax benefits, it's a win-win for the greater good of communities you care about.
7. Review your insurance policies and negotiate a better rate (or move on) before their end dates.
Experts often agree this is a small but mighty step to take each year, especially since insurance rates are competitive, you could be spending more money than you need to (or not enough) and your insurance rates can affect your mortgage payments.
8. Call your loan provider and refinance.
As interest rates fall, “millions of borrowers may be able to refinance and get more affordable payments. As interest rates eased down to 6.5%, about 2.5 million borrowers could already refinance and save at least 75 basis points (0.75%) on their interest rate,” the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau reports. You can also refinance student and other types of loans.
9. Stop buying individual items and stock up via going bulk.
Research has found that, among 30 common products, buying in bulk could save you 27% compared with buying in lower quantities. Water, paper products, and baby products like diapers, toiletries, and garbage bags are the top items where people see the most cost-effectiveness. (This has been a lifesaver for me—children, large family, or not—especially when it comes to toothpaste, deodorant, toilet paper, and feminine hygiene products, saving stress, time, and money.)
10. Go cash-only for the holidays.
If you set smart goals and stick to limits on things like gifts, going out to eat, or groceries, you'll see the benefits of this. Cash-stuffing is one method recommended, but something as simple as taking a $10 bill out for lunch, disabling that card for an hour, and leaving your card in a safe place at the office can give you that mindset jump start to see how far you can take your money without the need to splurge.
Love And Romance
11. Say "no."
There are clear mental and physical health benefits to saying no including the setting of healthy boundaries, creating time and energy for other self-care activities, and protecting yourself from physically harmful situations (i.e. unprotected sex or abuse). Just say it, clearly and simply, when you need to.
12. Set a fun, free, adults-only date night for once a week or twice a month with your spouse.
If busy, high-profile folk have touted the success of this, even you can make the time for quality time with your partner. And it's even better when it costs nothing. The best connections are made doing something chill, challenging, or outside the usual dinner-and-a-movie date. Play a game that allows you to reconnect, take a walk in your neighborhood to chat and laugh, or try a little erotic chocolate/edible liquid/paint episode a la Mea Culpa.
13. Go out with Mr. or Ms. "Not My Type."
I love my man, but if I were waiting out for my "type" at the time, we wouldn't be celebrating seven (going on eight) years together. Sometimes having strict, unrealistic expectations for a spouse (especially related to things like height, physical features, or career path) is what's keeping you alone and lonely.
Take the pressure off and explore all your options. I'm not telling you to stop popping the balloon on the guy who earns $20,000 less than you if that's a hard no that Jesus himself told you to skip. I'm asking you to explore other options and see what else God might have out there for your love journey.
14. Immediately apologize and pray together.
I've learned that always being "right" isn't always ideal when you truly care about someone and you're in a relationship for the long haul. Defaulting to an apology when necessary, even when things aren't 100% resolved, is a good way to prioritize peace and save your energy for more worthwhile battles. Research has even supported the benefits of apologies in relationships, and how couples married for five or more years do it often.
15. Get a Rose and discover true self-love.
Do I really have to explain this? You've gotta know what satisfies you, and how better to figure that out than to practice self-love in the bed by yourself? You can also try this with a partner, but as a woman who got on this train very much later in my sexual activity journey. I have a lot more learning to do on my own, and even in a satisfying relationship, I like to find out new things about myself, by myself.
Figure out what you're into, watch what you want to watch, and read what you want to read to define pleasure for yourself. There's a freedom and empowering element there especially if you're used to prioritizing pleasing your partner.
16. Be direct and have the "money talk" with bae.
Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce, so you need to have those conversations before you even think about marrying someone. And true, nobody can predict the future so you won't be able to avoid some challenges altogether, however, talking with your potential spouse about how they view money, their spending habits, and the pain points in terms of their approach to money management can at least give you a glimpse into what's in store if you do walk down the aisle, move in with them, or decide to share a bank account/business/child with them.
17. Invest in the "paid" version of that dating app.
I know plenty of successful, married folk who did this and met "the one" as a result. Let's be honest: The free version is for playing around. I had a lot of fun with my "free" profile back in the day, trust me. Upgrade that photo, profile, and package, and see if the quality of your dating adventures changes when you're serious about finding a true partner. Dating coaches and matchmakers cosign this.
18. Solo travel to meet that long-distance connection.
Sometimes, your perfect match isn't within 100 miles of you, and that's okay. Make it an adventure, enjoy the memories, and book that ticket. I met my man this way and it's been a whirlwind escape ever since. If you're not comfortable traveling solo, travel or (network to plan travel) with a group via Facebook.
Career And Business
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19. Schedule coffee or virtual meetups with smart people from your graduating class, previous employer, or current employer.
I have gotten many freelance opportunities by doing this. It's as simple as connecting and offering value (or simply learning how you can better equip yourself to do so.) It's also a great way to expand your network, spark new friendships, or find out about new job opportunities.
20. Invest in a well-made suit.
I don't care what industry you're in, a suit says "power," and it's not as old-school or out-of-style as you'd think. Plus the whole experience of looking for a new one (or getting one tailored) is fun and affirming. Try these options. I swear, anytime I wear a blazer, I'm treated like a celebrity or boss, especially when traveling. I was once upgraded to first-class wearing a yellow blazer outfit, and the airline professional literally said, "You look like somebody important. Here you go."
21. Volunteer for a worthwhile project or cause that's important to your company.
If you're overworked and underappreciated, skip this one, but if you truly have the time, love what you do, and want to advance, this move is clutch. Volunteering for extra projects got me where I am today in media because I had foresight, and knew that was the only way at the time to leverage relationships, and I was able to challenge myself to learn skills that 20 years later are still bankable. That VP you can't get a meeting with will be at that gala your company is planning, so join that committee, sis.
22. Write down why you deserve a raise and ask for it in your next one-on-one.
Gather those receipts (ie sales increase numbers, KPIs met, deals closed, people acquired via recruitment, the impact of systems updates, or other tangible success metrics) and ask for that raise before the first or second-quarter budgets are being finalized.
23. Instead of quitting, write down your exit plan.
While revenge quitting is set to be a thing next year (and maybe you're among those who will be leading the trend), try the better boss move and quit with a real plan.
24. Start automatically separating that estimated self-employed quarterly tax estimate.
If you have side hustles (or you're collecting 1099 income,) baby, you do not want to neglect those quarter tax payments. Talk to a professional, do your research, and set up automatic transfers to an account specifically for paying these at the appropriate due dates.
25. Sign up for a free one- to 11-week course related to your industry—or the industry you want to be in next year.
Institutions like Harvard University and platforms like Coursera offer free courses that can enhance your skills. You can also invest in certificate courses with accredited colleges as well as tech training.
26. Hit "Easy Apply" for 10 dream jobs listed on LinkedIn.
While you shouldn't solely rely on this when actively job-seeking, using this convenient LinkedIn option is a great way to get into the habit of applying for positions. And if you're already employed, you should still be "dating" other employers if you're looking to make a move in the next six months. Keep your interview skills sharp, practice toughening up for the "nos," and get a bit of an ego boost in the process.
Self-Care And Wellness
27. Pre-schedule three month's worth of massages.
Oftentimes this is cost-effective since some spas offer deals for multiple bookings. Also, it makes an act of self-care deliberate and important, not an option. When you get that reminder call, you'll know it's real.
28. Fire that therapist and try another one.
Cultural competency in mental health support is one major problem that can hinder Black women from even bothering with therapy. And who wants the added stress of spending multiple, paid sessions explaining why something is a microaggression? Cut the cord and move on to try someone else, either via a Black women therapists channel or recommendations from others.
29. Join a small group at church.
Bedside service ain't gonna cut it and neither is going to the usual Sunday service. Join a smaller group and upgrade your efforts to connect, network, and elevate spiritually. Even if virtually, take a step to dig a bit deeper with more targeted Bible study and discussions.
30. Say no, even to loved ones.
This is on here twice, for a reason. Saying no is the simplest, most powerful micro-action you can take today to make 2025 better. No explanations. No guilt. Say no.
31. Choose one "luxury" beauty product for skincare and stick to it.
This was trending big on social, especially for millennials hitting their 40s. There's just something so freeing about not giving in to every trend and sticking to the basics that work, especially when there are quality, healthy ingredients involved. Put those orders on auto-renew.
32. Sign up for a new sport or fitness class just for fun, not for results.
It's great to be on a weight-loss or weight-lifting journey, but try something just for the fun of it. Switch things up with a couple of these fitness activities.
33. Book a staycation.
Leave the passport at home and explore a nearby community or another town in your state. There's so much enrichment in your own backyard right here in the U.S., and you don't even have to break the bank.
34. Pre-schedule your mammograms, Pap smear, and peri-menopause checkups for next year.
Take control of your health by pre-scheduling essential appointments like mammograms, Pap smears, and peri-menopause check-ups for 2025. Prioritizing these screenings early ensures you stay on top of your wellness and make time for self-care in the new year.
35. Cut off support of beauty and wellness professionals whose customer service is below standard.
This is another one that many Black women have been vocal about—from unrealistic pre-appointment requirements, to booking fees, to long waits, to unsavory in-salon experiences. Spot the red flags early, and just stop accommodating foolishness. Support salons or experienced stylists who are kind, have proper systems in place and value your time.
36. Schedule five to 10-minute moments of silence on your calendar.
Again, wellness is not optional, and if it's not on my calendar, it's not official. Sit quietly. Pray. Meditate. Or do nothing. The benefits of silent moments are almost endless.
37. Download a meditation app.
If you've found that meditation is difficult to schedule or to even start, an app can help. Try this, this, or this one, and take that step to embrace something new to enhance your wellness routine. If you're tired of downloading apps, create a playlist for meditation via Amazon Music or Spotify and schedule a reminder to do it once a day or week.
38. Invest in a healthy meal prep or delivery service.
Time is emotionally expensive, so save as much of it as possible. Getting into meal prep to keep to your goals is a great way to save time, stress, and effort. The health benefits of meal prepping have also been proven via research.
39. Create a positive playlist on Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube, or other streaming platform.
It can be podcasts, music, affirmations, or somatic sounds. It's a game-changer. You can even set an alarm to wake you up to start your day with the positive playlist. Not into creating your own? There are plenty to choose from with a quick search.
40. Set up reminders for Alexa (Siri or other AI) to remind you, "You are loved," and "You are okay."
This simple effort can boost your endorphins and remind you that you're indeed, not alone, and you will be okay, regardless. To set mine up, I simply commanded, "Alexa, remind me everyday 'Jesus loves me,'" and like clockwork she does. She almost scared the ish out of me one day when I'd forgotten the reminder was active, but it was the reminder I needed when anxiety had gotten the best of me that week.
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The energy of the year is about wrapping things up, tying up loose ends, and completing one cycle or phase in your life. We close the door to one experience or way of being and enter a new one. A 9 Year pushes us to change and also invites us to nourish in the abundance that has come from such change and efforts.
Astrology’s Blueprint for 2025: Let Go, Level Up, and Thrive
There will be a lot of letting go this year, but these are necessary transitions as we focus on what is essential and a true priority for our lives right now. For those who are Life Path 9s, this will be a significant year for you, when life comes full circle and changes for the better. Next year is overall about letting go, culmination, growth, and being the master of your reality.
YOUR 2025 KEY ASTROLOGICAL INSIGHTS
THE BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR LOVE
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January 2, 2025 - February 4, 2025: Venus In Pisces
Venus is exalted in Pisces, and magic comes through in love. This is the time to believe in miracles and to envision what your heart wants right now. Keeping an open mind and heart is key, as the possibilities of love unfold for you. Emotions are running high, and people are looking to connect and build new relationships right now.
June 6, 2025 - July 4, 2025: Venus in Taurus
When Venus is in Taurus, Venus is home. Venus is the planet of love, security, and romance, and is the planetary ruler of Taurus. During this transit, love matters take shape more strongly, and there is a sense of stability blooming now.
This is the perfect time to go on a date, put yourself out there, or treat someone special with something special.
Love is the vibe right now, and this is the time of the year when romance is high. This is also a great time of the year for wedding bells or engagements.
October 21, 2025: New Moon In Libra
A New Moon in Virgo signifies a new beginning in love. New doors open and new chapters begin, and not only is this a good time to experience love, but it’s also a great time to manifest it.
Love may surprise you right now, as the New Moon aligns with the Sun and Venus currently in Libra as well.
Partnerships matters are experiencing a breakthrough, and expect the good energy you’ve been putting out to be coming back to you right now. Write down lists of intentions for your new beginning in love right now, and let your blessings come to you.
November 6, 2025 - November 30, 2025: Venus In Scorpio
Venus in Scorpio brings passion and intimacy to love. During this time, you can see relationships take it to the next level, and more commitment being nurtured here. Venus in Scorpio doesn’t want superficial love- it wants the real thing, and that’s the energy you are getting right now. This is the perfect time of the year to cuddle up with your boo and plan a special night with just you two. Venus in Scorpio transforms love and makes it more concrete.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR TRAVEL
June 26, 2025 - July 18, 2025: Mercury In Leo
This is a good time of the year to travel, and do something that makes you happy. The focus right now is on your pleasure, your joy, and the excitement your heart is looking for right now. The vibes are high with Mercury in Leo, and this is a good time to put yourself first and have some fun.
This is a good time to take a trip before Mercury will be Retrograde in Leo from July 18 - Aug. 11, making travel plans more chaotic after this period.
September 13, 2025 - November 15, 2025: Vesta In Sagittarius
Vesta in Sagittarius helps us step outside our comfort zone. This is the time of year when people are more inspired to travel, as the energy is high for adventure.
This is the perfect time to embrace your inner free spirit and take a risk.
Dedicate yourself to your passions, and be prepared to learn something new in your explorations. This is a time to travel with good company, have fun, and gain a new perspective.
December 19, 2025: New Moon In Sagittarius
This New Moon in Sagittarius is a good time of the year for travel matters, and this is also a good time to set your intentions for travel matters you want to see through but haven’t gotten to yet. When the Moon is in Sagittarius, emotions are high and so are the possibilities. Surprise opportunities for travel may fall into your lap right now, and this is a good time to go after the things you want. If you have the opportunity to travel, this is the perfect time to go to a new place or explore a new location.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR CAREER
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February 4, 2025 - June 9, 2025: Jupiter In Gemini
This is Jupiter's final leg in Gemini for the next decade or so, and Jupiter in Gemini is great for making new business connections, coming up with new ideas, and getting projects done. Jupiter in Gemini things big and doesn’t doubt or judge the ideas it comes up with. This is the time to bring creative and exciting energy into your career and push forth your efforts, especially if you have a career revolving around communication, social media, travel, writing, or publication.
April 27, 2025: New Moon In Taurus
This New Moon is a great time of the year to set your intentions for your career and your financial world. A New Moon in Taurus aligns you with your desires and helps you see concrete steps you can take to get there right now.
Whatever you have been patient for in career matters is coming to fruition for you now, and this is also a good time for seeing past efforts manifest into success for you.
Write a list of the financial and professional accomplishments you want to see come true for you this year and remember that you are worth every bit of it.
December 15, 2025 - January 23, 2026: Mars In Capricorn
Mars in Capricorn helps us develop in our careers, and also be recognized for our skills and talents. This is a great time to go after a promotion, ask for a raise, or see a level up in your career. Professional matters come full circle around this time, and the things you are known for here are coming to the surface now. Mars in Capricorn brings the passion and the energy needed to succeed.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR TO MOVE
February 23, 2025 - April 18, 2025: Mars Direct In Cancer
Mars will be direct in Cancer for a little over a month, after being retrogade here at the start of the year. With Mars now direct, any initiatives you have been looking to set in regards to the home, family, and your foundations, are more likely to succeed right now. This is a good time to gain some more stability in your life, revamp the home, or move into a safer, or more nourishing environment. Mars in Cancer understands the importance of personal needs and emotional well-being and helps us align with what you need to feel safe.
June 9, 2025 - November 11, 2025: Jupiter Direct In Cancer
Jupiter enters Cancer for the next year and will be direct for five months out of the year. During these five months, this is one of the best times in over a decade, to see blessings happening within matters of the home. Many people will be moving homes, locations, and cities, during this time, and with expansive Jupiter involved, a lot of these changes are creating something bigger and better for you. This is the time to figure out what home means to you and to see your blessings expand here.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR HEALTH
May 18, 2025: Jupiter Sextile Chiron
This is a significant time for healing, and seeing the blessings that come from it. Jupiter in Gemini Sextiles Chiron in Aries, and the insights you can gain now will help you see the bigger picture in health matters. This is a time for feeling more inspired to take care of yourself and heal, and seeing more immediate benefits for doing so. This is healing on a broad scale, and some powerful events in health matters can occur for you now.
June 17, 2025 - August 6, 2025: Mars In Virgo
Mars in Virgo marks a time of new development in health. Mars gets things done in Virgo, and a lot of these initiatives will be taking place when it comes to the body, daily routine, and lifestyle. This is a good time to commit to a new health regime or practice and to find new ways to take care of yourself. You have more energy and stamina to take care of your health, and the initiatives you take will benefit you overall right now.
THE BEST TIME OF THE YEAR TO MAKE A CHANGE
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January 2, 2025 - March 21, 2025: Vesta In Scorpio
This energy embraces change. Vesta in Scorpio represents your commitment and responsibilities, and in Scorpio, helps us readdress and acknowledge ours. This is the time of the year to look at what you have planned for yourself, to rewrite or to recommit where needed, and a lot of this has to do with the inner work. The changes that benefit now, are coming internally, and where you want to devote more of your passions, time, and self.
August 11, 2025: Saturn Sextile Uranus
Saturn Retrograde in Aries forms a Sextile to Uranus in Gemini, and this is the time to shock people with the changes you are making right now.
Change is favored during this time, as there is more support for not only seeing your goals through but also making something out of them that helps you succeed in the long run.
With Saturn, the planet of long-term planning, forming a harmonious Sextile with Uranus, the planet of sudden changes, you are supported as you try something new right now.
August 23, 2025: New Moon In Virgo
A New Moon in Virgo encourages change and evolution. When the Moon is in Virgo we feel more inspired to make a positive change in our life, in also to experience “something better.” We are pushed to face where things have been out of place or disruptive, and Virgo helps us get things right. This is a great time of year to make a new plan or set a new initiative, and to do what is going to benefit you in the long run.
September 22 - November 4: Mars In Scorpio
Mars in Scorpio is all about transformation. During this time of the year, motivation is high to overcome a challenge or a fear, and we are more willing to do so now. Mars in Scorpio energy brings the courage we may need to make an important change in our lives and helps us feel confident enough to do so. Mars in Scorpio is driven to overcome and evolve and there is a lot of support to do so right now.
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